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drug test evasion by Jellyfish - Fri, 16 Dec 2016 02:35:45 EST ID:1x9SSyVl No.28759 Ignore Report Reply Quick Reply
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hey guys
/v/irgin here desperate for some surefire quick as fuck detoxing advice

got hired at a call center and part of their pre-employment requirements includes drug testing on urine and feces (not sure why feces is included don't ask) for meth and weed
been smoking more or less full-time for 2 years now and I have 3 weeks max to turn in all my required paperwork

am I fucked? do I have to ditch this job? or is there a surefire way I could possibly (lol) rid myself of all the toxins built up in my body?
5'6" 161 lb here

thanks so much in advance
2 posts omitted. Click Reply to view.
Wesley Lightstock - Sun, 18 Dec 2016 10:12:06 EST ID:nn6uH/Td No.28764 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Who gives a fuck
You will either pass or not
If there's one thing in this world, it's 500 million call centre jobs. Worst case get another.
Don't change your life over a call centre job.
Jellyfish - Sun, 18 Dec 2016 23:07:23 EST ID:hQlyt2En No.28765 Ignore Report Quick Reply
yeah I know that much
I just don't know what I should be doing
here if my test ends up positive they'll send the results to the government and they'll force me to go to rehab
I don't want that to happen
should I ditch?
Lillian Soffingdale - Mon, 19 Dec 2016 02:48:08 EST ID:nn6uH/Td No.28766 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Can they really do that? I guess it depends where you live
Rehab sucks don't go there
Phyllis Dankinnidging - Fri, 23 Dec 2016 03:14:38 EST ID:z8srR6Mi No.28768 Ignore Report Quick Reply
wondering where is here?
Ian Tootspear - Fri, 06 Jan 2017 14:12:52 EST ID:YnLTJ3mj No.28807 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Try fasting i heard it does some hella good detox.basicaly glorified starvation lol
look it up its a real thing

Drug Test Soon! by Archie Beblingshaw - Mon, 12 Dec 2016 11:43:25 EST ID:x1ePO7hN No.28749 Ignore Report Reply Quick Reply
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Will this detox shit work? I have to get this job. I'm a pretty regular user but stopped three days ago. I don't know exactly when, but the test will be this week. I got pic relatedo to take two days before and also vale triple strength from a head shop
Caroline Menningham - Mon, 02 Jan 2017 09:02:37 EST ID:po/7JmQq No.28788 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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Look at the ingredients, its bull shit but it should work. Its the same method as drinking a fuckton of water and taking vitamin B and creatine. I was going to buy some my self for my upcoming employment tests but its waaaaay more exspensive than buying vitamin B and creatine.
Ian Tootspear - Fri, 06 Jan 2017 14:10:03 EST ID:YnLTJ3mj No.28805 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Don't try any retarded shit because shit is mostly overpriced placebo.
If you have strong enough will or you're poor as fuck then you will quit easily lol

Giving someone else's pee by Martin Duckson - Tue, 03 Jan 2017 14:23:52 EST ID:szdbRPJZ No.28793 Ignore Report Reply Quick Reply
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I'm being tested in a year and I want to prove that I've been away from pot all this time.
So I'll have a sober friend take a test every month, proving that I didn't smoke at all.

Is it possible to deduct from my friend's results alone that the tests are not mine?
We're both males, in our20s. I'm thin and he's pretty average.
Martin Duckson - Tue, 03 Jan 2017 14:29:30 EST ID:szdbRPJZ No.28794 Ignore Report Quick Reply
For clarification: I'm doing this all by myself. The ones who test me and the doctor will never contact each other. I get to switch urine samples as much as I please and they will definitely believe me.
My question is just if it's possible to tell through my bullshit based alone on my friend's toxicological results.
Nigel Clurringson - Wed, 04 Jan 2017 12:53:30 EST ID:JzxvTBYa No.28797 Ignore Report Quick Reply
In my experience in florida, they literally make you turn around and watch you whip out your dick when you pee. The lab they use won't give a fuck if you can pull it off if it's clean with average hormone levels for your genders age. But getting the piss in the cup is the hard part.
Nigel Clurringson - Wed, 04 Jan 2017 12:55:33 EST ID:JzxvTBYa No.28798 Ignore Report Quick Reply
In that case you should be fine unless he's becoming a woman and is on estrogen, or that nigga takes drugs like a mf.
James Tootson - Wed, 04 Jan 2017 20:05:50 EST ID:1sPVXLTl No.28799 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Worked for me for a job, when I had to go to a diagnostics place. Make sure its fresh, i.e. a day old or less
Frederick Dongerhood - Sun, 08 Jan 2017 20:13:20 EST ID:tIxOPyg6 No.28810 Ignore Report Quick Reply
thx a lot guys gals and non-binary people

New years break? by what !!QJGTUbuf - Sat, 31 Dec 2016 03:55:46 EST ID:6cyt7Swl No.28781 Ignore Report Reply Quick Reply
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So I've pretty much been trying to quit, unsuccessfully, for about 9 months now. I've /finally/ tapered off my usage, going from about a gram of heroin a day to about a half gram every 3-4 days, and have enough for tomorrow and nothing else.

I'm aiming for 2 weeks clean. Anybody else tryin' to take a break?
David Smallville - Sat, 31 Dec 2016 13:17:25 EST ID:qF/LIONV No.28783 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Yeah, I only smoke weed though. I probably won't smoke again until 4/20
John Parrysig - Wed, 04 Jan 2017 00:31:24 EST ID:D6Pkji5b No.28795 Ignore Report Quick Reply
30 days clean off of benzo's which started as a break but now I think i'm going to turn it into a permanent thing. Was scared of the PAWS but i'm handling it better than I expected I would and feel like I absolutely don't want to start fucking up my GABA receptors again. I'm mostly pissed I wasted my early 20's fucking up my mind and body with them but i'm on the right track now. Anxiety and brief thoughts of suicide creep in once and awhile but no panic attacks so far but if it happens it happens.

Good job on taking a break on the heroin and I bet you'll make your goal of 2 weeks clean a reality. Once you reach the 2 weeks set a goal for another day and then another. Don't take the counting thing too seriously till you get about a week down imo though then you can start marking the days on paper. If you start marking from day 1 it will seem like everything's happening at turtle speed and you might get discouraged. After enough days you can take your mental notes and put them to paper and the fact that you got multiple days under your belt will really boost your confidence and you'll feel like you're conquering shit like a boss.
Nathaniel Wuttinggold - Wed, 04 Jan 2017 09:31:43 EST ID:/ceJSt+S No.28796 Ignore Report Quick Reply
I've been clean off opiates for ten days now. Lately I feel happier and more upbeat and motivated to achieve goals that I've made for myself. I smoke weed now and that's it. Meditation plays a keyhole for my sobriety and my outlook on life. With every passing day it gets easier.

30-day sober living house by Skizzlepuss !dO744cvTW. - Fri, 30 Dec 2016 13:26:48 EST ID:E5goLQFH No.28780 Ignore Report Reply Quick Reply
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So next Wednesday I'll be moving in to a sober living house for a month.
I'm gonna assume some of y'all have been in one, this being a detox board on a drug-friendly imageboard and all that.
I'm waiting for some house manager to email me an itinerary thing, but I come to you lot with a question;
What am I to expect as far as living there. I got a general overview of activities and such from my IOP counselor, but I'd like to know what to expect living there. Also any form of advice to keep in mind while living there.
I'm sorry for the length of this post, I'm pretty excited to get this shit going and all that jazz.

Benzo by Lydia Honeyshit - Sat, 24 Dec 2016 20:16:25 EST ID:TVtHHct6 No.28770 Ignore Report Reply Quick Reply
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How long will 10 mg diazepam stay in my system?
Lydia Honeyshit - Sat, 24 Dec 2016 20:21:06 EST ID:TVtHHct6 No.28771 Ignore Report Quick Reply
One time use
Alice Hennerstig - Fri, 30 Dec 2016 10:23:10 EST ID:go6KeH0M No.28777 Ignore Report Quick Reply
it'll only affect you for a few hours but its detectable for like 3-5 days

detoxing from heroin by Matilda Fosslehidge - Sun, 11 Dec 2016 22:01:41 EST ID:Qzvccu3S No.28745 Ignore Report Reply Quick Reply
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sup /detox/ so coming off a moderate heroin habit today after tapering from 2 grams daily to 1/4 gram,it's been 12 hours since last time I took it, have 1 sub 8mg and some lyrica 10 pills 150mg to help keep the wds at bay.

also is 12 hours enough to start with the subs or do I have to wait more, now I feel very mild wds, which is weird since at 12 hours I usually very miserable.

What's the best way to take this?
should I take the suboxone first 8mg on 3-4 days 2 mg daily. then take the lyrica as needed?

is it safe to take lyrica and subs together?
How would you do it?
Sophie Pockspear - Mon, 12 Dec 2016 21:40:54 EST ID:KIypMeYM No.28750 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Sophie Pockspear - Mon, 12 Dec 2016 22:01:25 EST ID:KIypMeYM No.28751 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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waited 24 hours and took 2 mg suboxone, was afraid of precipitated wds but none happened, so I guess I have one question answered, will wait 24 hours more then take another 2mg ,followed by 1 mg each 24 hours and lyrica as needed.

My question now is.
since suboxone is an opioid will heroin wds start after I stop the subs ?
planning to start work after 10 days so I don't want any unpleasant surprises.
Oliver Nicklewill - Thu, 15 Dec 2016 22:53:49 EST ID:Xj5AnXgv No.28758 Ignore Report Quick Reply

PO drug test by David Clollerworth - Wed, 14 Dec 2016 11:25:23 EST ID:M3jtk+j0 No.28753 Ignore Report Reply Quick Reply
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I had not smoked weed in months, and I did a bunch of edibles one day. I then took a probation drug test 24 days after and they sent it to a lab.

Before I took the test at the PO office I took an at home test the same day with my first void and passed with a feint line, I also drank a gallon of water and peed like 6 times before the actual drug test .

Do you think I passed?

I'm gonna find out later today anyways so I'll let you know even if I dont get any responses.
Matilda Fepperberk - Wed, 14 Dec 2016 13:49:55 EST ID:4zHjCjCT No.28754 Ignore Report Quick Reply
They might make you piss again if you diluted your urine too much.
Walter Clundlehall - Wed, 14 Dec 2016 14:03:16 EST ID:vIUeMfHE No.28755 Ignore Report Quick Reply
thats fine if they do because now its been 55+ days without smoking
Matilda Fepperberk - Wed, 14 Dec 2016 16:29:46 EST ID:4zHjCjCT No.28756 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Edibles tho ...
Charles Trotwater - Wed, 14 Dec 2016 18:36:57 EST ID:g1vWbD7O No.28757 Ignore Report Quick Reply
I passed.

Wew what a load off. Not gonna fuck with it again

Feeling... *too* clean by Hedda Brivingfack - Wed, 30 Nov 2016 21:12:03 EST ID:lcVZhURA No.28720 Ignore Report Reply Quick Reply
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So I just spent 4 days drinking water, smoothies, eating good food and having baths - in between extended periods in bed sleeping off weed and nicotine withdrawals.

I've actually came out the other side feeling a little, too fresh. It's impossible for me to describe such an abstract feeling with much precision. But my best attempt would sound something like the following...

I have such a clear head, that it feels too clear. To the point where it's almost a little weird, this isn't what I'm used to. My brain feels weird, like it's had it's rhythm turned up and I can't quite feel comfortable with the pace. My skin feels more alert than I like.

I've spent years numbing myself with weed and cigarettes, it's hardly a deadly drug but between that and the shitty lifestyle/lack of diet - the last few days have been a massive change in parameters. It's really jumpstarted me.

Any input. Any similar experiences?
Augustus Pucklemedge - Wed, 30 Nov 2016 22:59:58 EST ID:VQ4K9bgx No.28721 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Four days isn't long enough, you'll settle into your current self well enough eventually.
David Worthingwater - Mon, 05 Dec 2016 00:17:03 EST ID:LuxnZNU/ No.28729 Ignore Report Quick Reply
I also went through this feeling when I stopped doing opiated and decided to start eating better. Still on the cigarettes though.

Like the other guy said, yeah, just give it time. You're not far in yet. Give it at least a few more months. Feeling clean is a weird feeling after you've eaten terrible food and put terrible shit into your body. Just stick with it. You'll eventually prefer it, vastly.
Fuck Clillerstock - Fri, 09 Dec 2016 04:33:59 EST ID:LKQzB6Ue No.28737 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Yup, the secret is to go weekend warrior and binge on fridays and saturdays. Otherwise you'll relapse
William Pittson - Tue, 13 Dec 2016 01:45:39 EST ID:nn6uH/Td No.28752 Ignore Report Quick Reply
This is very true
I used to wonder how long I could make it without booze, smokes, or fast food (and meat etc in my case), now I'd rather get punched than drink a beer again
Still medical mj tho, but starting to get sick of it
Either way, you will get healthier in ways you didn't even realise you could be
Ppl will mention that you look better (or don't look dead anymore)
Stick with it

Quitting stimming by Ebenezer Lightgold - Sun, 27 Nov 2016 14:33:25 EST ID:VWCn2EdB No.28711 Ignore Report Reply Quick Reply
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People keep saying quitting stims is a walk in the park, so how the fuck do you do this exactly?! Say, you have a ~100mg a day amphetamine habit and you quit, because you're a little wuss, who can't take a wee bit of mood swings and stabbing sensations in the fingers. How do you wake up every morning? How do you not get debilitating panic attacks upon waking up? How do you keep your job and pay your rent?
3 posts omitted. Click Reply to view.
Henry Buzzson - Sat, 03 Dec 2016 04:49:40 EST ID:ej7S7d54 No.28725 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Not really quitting. But if one just lacks resources to keep using it should be easy enough for most.
Archie Nicklebury - Sun, 04 Dec 2016 00:38:59 EST ID:/6EA5qK+ No.28726 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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I am quitting too for a while. The day after tomorrow I will already have my first sober day ;-)

My plan is to see it as a challenging build-up game. I am rebuilding my health, forging my body, fixing this wreck I am to some degree. After being up for three days I just feel so damn sick, it just pisses me off and I don't want to live my life in that downward spiral.

A good friend (non-user) is taking care of my leftovers, because the last time I flushed all my shit I regretted it after half a year or so. This way I know it is still there and available (peace of mind, no regret about the waste), but the barrier of shame for begging my friend to feed my daemon and his stubborn character will safe me from that "ah fuck it, let's get ripped" attitude.

Also I'm counting on the benefits of some healthy sleep, doing sports and eating hot for dopamine release compensation again.

Finally my goal is to stay completely sober (except of low-dose caffeine) for one week. After that time some weed or beer on a few days of the week might be acceptable, but no hard drugs for a good while and no more binging that's for sure. Maybe I even let my friend manage that supply as well. After all he is the only one I know and can trust to not send me to the psychiatric ward of gossip about my problems.

I am so thankful to know a person like him. Challenging a vice like this is so much easier with the helping hand of a comrade.

/stim wall of text

My advice is to reach out for help that suits your goals, trying to imagine or even visualize your progress on this grand battle against yourself and (common problem for everything I want to accomplish) not setting your goals too high. If you are weak, you won't be able to push the boulder all to the top, to see it roll down the other side. Just take your time and improve in a way you can handle without being crushed.
Comment too long. Click here to view the full text.
Wesley Blablingsadging - Sat, 10 Dec 2016 05:56:44 EST ID:VWCn2EdB No.28739 Ignore Report Quick Reply
OP here, you sound exactly as someone daydreaming on that stim buzz.
Good point about sugar tho.
Thanks for your input, good luck to you too.
Wesley Blablingsadging - Sat, 10 Dec 2016 06:00:08 EST ID:VWCn2EdB No.28740 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>/stim wall of text
just noticed this part hah
careful about this stuff, because ime it leads to extreme self-deprecation on the next day/comedown/next time shit goes south.
Basil Masslehat - Mon, 12 Dec 2016 04:17:42 EST ID:sm7B5NrW No.28748 Ignore Report Quick Reply
I say keep a notice of how long one stays away from whatever for a while, but move that over to noticeable improvements in health, thinking. Being able to project projects, hobbies, health , attitude. I used to project what the next day would be. What should be expected by the end of the day week, weeks, and should be able to kind of just rebuild yourself, personality, thinking any way
you like. Speed may know onedows ans many drugs do, take the same
amount effort, of relying on speed/drugs to accomplish what you would like to be instead. I quit drinking, smoking cigs and projected in a month that I could do
5 full fingertip pullups in a week after doing this for a day. Well it took some help
by using my feet to help me get a few, not cheating but just a starting pint. I projected that I coud mayne do 5 after that in a week. Well yea, 43, 4 without any modification. So next projected goal was 7 to 10 in a week. Got that so eventually it was 50 in three weeks, 100 in another two.

Bike riding projected riding 5 miles a day, to 20, 40, sure it hurt but I was putting as much effort into not smoking cigs, I drank little at the time, but. Was am minor setback in progress in my mind. In all doing these My thinking was rewired
from dumb default craving alcohol (addictive traits) smoking and had a forward always train of thought. Yea visualization of moving forward by default can be realized.

Timeline for detoxing? by Sidney Sebbleford - Tue, 06 Dec 2016 12:43:20 EST ID:eBL9wkqm No.28731 Ignore Report Reply Quick Reply
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I took a break from smoking pot for about 3 months in the summer, then started up in Aug. I would smoke every night (a pinner, so it wasn't even a lot). I'm 20 pounds overweight. I still smoked pinners but I haven't smoked in 2 days.

Would it be out of my system within 2 weeks based on this information?
Jenny Dindlechedging - Thu, 08 Dec 2016 18:42:33 EST ID:0e27MsQM No.28735 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Probably not. 3 weeks min, more likely 4, but cutting out fatty food and exercising will help clear it faster
Eugene Gommlefetch - Sun, 11 Dec 2016 16:29:02 EST ID:4zHjCjCT No.28744 Ignore Report Quick Reply
While increasing metabolism would theoretically clear the weed from your system faster, when bodyfat is oxidized for energy (as in, losing weight due to decreased caloric intake) the cannabinoids stored in your bodyfat WILL be released into your bloodstream and can cause you to test positive, even if it's been months of abstinence. There's no chance you'll piss clean in just 2 weeks unless you void your bladder a few times before pissing for the test. Your tolerance, however, will be much lower than before and you'll get high AF off that same pinner you probably didn't feel that much.

dtox by Shit Blenningsan - Mon, 05 Dec 2016 16:27:06 EST ID:eu0vN5cZ No.28730 Ignore Report Reply Quick Reply
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I have an important drug test (dipstick piss test) at the end of January (23rd or 24th). I've been completely clean for the past 2 months. Before that I was a daily weed user for years. I'm visiting some friends this weekend and I want to smoke weed with them. Knowing them it will probably be an all-out consumption fest, smoking nug, dabs, and taking edibles every waking moment for 3 days straight. Can I afford to partake with them and still beat the test with about 7 weeks of detox? I'm 26 y/o 5'11" 165 lbs. I'm in great shape and I run an average of 50 km per week.
Alice Buzzgold - Wed, 07 Dec 2016 16:31:43 EST ID:CR/3V/zR No.28734 Ignore Report Quick Reply
you just need 3 weeks - 1 month max of detox, what the hell are you talking about?
Graham Drummerlat - Fri, 09 Dec 2016 15:38:54 EST ID:eu0vN5cZ No.28738 Ignore Report Quick Reply

just wanted to be sure. I havent taken a piss test since before I starting smoking weed so I'm new to these things.
Eugene Gommlefetch - Sun, 11 Dec 2016 16:25:24 EST ID:4zHjCjCT No.28743 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Do this: Fill and empty your bladder a few times and take a B-Vitamin complex before you piss for the test.

Even with 7 weeks of abstinence there is a chance that you'd screen positive if a) they test your first piss of the morning, which will have the highest-possible metabolite concentrations b) you piss for the test after metabolizing bodyfat for energy (thus releasing stored cannabinoids) which will also spike the metabolite concentrations.

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