/detox/ Detoxify Yoself
The last thread isn't bumping since it's beyond the post limit. So, time for a new thread.How long have you been sober and what reasons do you have for quitting drug(s). For those who are completely sober from said drug or drugs, how has your life changed?As for me, I've been on suboxone for a few days now. My outlook on life is becoming positive compared to when I was popping pills. I'm still smoking weed and that's the extent of my current drug use. Everyday gets easier and easier. I hope for the best and will put the time and the effort in to better myself as a person.
trying to get the fuck off my pregabalin prescription after a year of abusing it & a misfired attempt at medicating with it which wound up to the last three months taking 900-1200mg a day. brought it right back down to 200mg yesterday & i feel like death incarnate .
>>28885you might feel like shit now. But, when you're done your taper and are clean you'll thank yourself for sticking the WD out until you're better. Keep going foward no matter how hard things might get. If you want this bad enough you'll do whatever needs to be done. Good luck to you.
>>28884sober today cause test tmrfeels good mon ..taking blue skate fish oil and collodial gold. think im healthy for itStay Clean bros
16 days sober right now, feels good mane
>>28888keep it up! it gets easier as the days go by. this weekend will make it a week since i got on subs and started meditating again. feels good to know that you're doing something that will improve yourself and your life which in this case is sobriety. same thing with me. but, i plan on doing more than just get clean this year. make some goals for yourself and work your hardest to achieve them. you can do this.
So today makes a week since I started my taper on suboxone. So far so good. As the days pass by I become someone with more willpower and resistance. I don't even think about taking opiates let alone become tempted by the thought. I have no cravings whatsoever. I bought two weeks worth of suboxone earlier this morning so I'm set for a while. I'll be all out on the 20th, the day my grandfather died which will be four years. I know he's looking down at me, proud of me for the person who I'm becoming. I will make him and my loved ones who are still here proud of me. I will show them the true person that I am on the inside, waiting to break out of my shell. I will "hatch" and spread my wings and fly. The more I meditate the more happier I become. So, I've been improving myself more than just getting off the opiates. I've also been reading self help books. The bottom line in any kind of self help book is to do the work. I'm already putting in the work to better myself as a person and be the best of a person that I can be.
OP here.It's been ten whole days since I got on suboxone. Everything just gets easier as the days pass by. I've been thinking a lot and I've had a lot time ponder on what I need to do first to get an important part of my life in order; get my GED so I can go to college and get my degree in whatever it is I want to pursue. I dropped out of school over ten years ago and I still have yet to get my GED. Well, I'm going to focus heavily on this so I can take the right steps to get to where I want to be out in the real world. But, first I'm going to focus on my taper and after I'm done tapering (which will be in April) is when I'll move onto that next step to get my life in order. I know I can do it because I want to be successful as bad as I want to breathe.
this saturday will make 2 weeks since i started my taper off of opiates with suboxone. I'm feeling really good right now. everything in my life is finally starting to click together with my new sense of self. i took many things for granted back then if not just about everything in life. but, now i feel fortunate to have what i got in my life; health, family, a source of income, and a roof over my head. their are people who are poor and have nowhere to go. i never thought of the glass being half full rather than half empty. but, its the opposite now. I'm going to keep growing as a person to be the best of a person that i can be. i will become the person who I'm destined to become, the strongest version of myself. i will do whatever the fuck it takes to get to where i want to be. no doubt about that.
tomorrow makes 2 weeks since i got on suboxone. I'm so proud of myself and my family is proud of me too. i will NEVER EVER touch another pill again after this. shit isn't worth it in the long run. it held me back from doing what i set out to do in my life. you only have once chance to live. fuck if I'm going to live my life an addict. i saw my father become consumed by alcohol and coke. he's all fucked up in the head because of it and his past. i will not turn out to be like him. fuck that! i will make a life for myself no matter what and stay sober (besides smoking weed) and thats all there is to it.
Today makes two weeks baby! Fuck yeah!! I've come this far and theirs no way in hell im going back to pills ever again. The more days that pass by the better of a person I become. Loving life right now and I feel so positive all the time rather than when I was negative all the time back then. The feeling that's come over me... No drug can make you feel how I feel about life and myself. I will keep pushing and do whatever the fuck it takes to get to where I want to be in life.
17 days of being on suboxone. Can't believe I made this far. I'm truly happy and proud of myself of sticking with it for this long. I'm going to keep going until I am completely off opiates and clean. I have so much to gain and so little to lose in life. I'm looking forward to the days ahead to see the person who I am becoming more and more.Today makes 11 years since I dropped out of highschool. I always think back and reflect on everything that I went through from then and all the way up to a year ago. I was a weak person inside and out. But, that's all starting to change with all the progress I'm making with what I'm aiming to achieve and conquer. Yeah, it was a huge mistake for me to drop out. But, it's not too late for me. I can still get my GED and go to school and get a degree in something that I want to do for the rest of my life. I realize now that if it wasn't for the hardships I went through I wouldn't be who I am today. In a weird way I am thankful for my past which I never thought I'd say.I'm going back to the gym on Thursday and losing the rest of this weight. Going to start lifting again too which I'm really excited about. I'm just doing everything I can do at the moment to improve upon myself without doing too much at once and end up failing. I'm going to train hard like a motherfucker and set to where I want to be, inside of the gym and out.Just you wait. I have this whole year to set out and do what I plan on accomplishing for myself. No more wasting time. Time to get serious.
Made it to the 20 day mark! Tomorrow makes three weeks since I got on suboxone. After next week I'm tapering down from 4mg suboxone to 2mg. As each day passes I get closer and closer to being sober from opiates. I cannot wait to be done with this. But, putting in the effort and work to taper off of opiates has made me grow as a person inside and out. It's like they say, "if you need to get something done you must do it yourself". I use to rely on my dealers for my fix and to keep my sanity. But, I don't need them anymore. I can finally stand on my own two feet and take care of myself more than I ever have. Life is great. As time goes by everything keeps getting better for me. After 10 long grueling years of pain, torment and suffering, I have finally "awakened" from the abyss that I was trapped in. I will never look back and keep going foward no matter what gets in my way.
Today makes three weeks. Im proud of how far I've come even though I got a ways to go. Over the past three weeks my life has changed so much. I am forever grateful for my life and everything and everyone around me. The grass is always greener on the other side. I never once thought I could turn myself around because of how weak of a person I use to be. But, I sure as hell proved myself wrong. Their is still a lot of progress made with myself. But, progress is a process. I'm enjoying the journey and not thinking only of the end result. Everything is going great in my life and I'm going to keep pushing onwards no matter what gets in my way.
>>28884Proud of you nigga
BWSI'm finally ready to quit the liquor. I got out of detox a few days ago and I think sobriety is going to stick this time. I hurt someone who has only ever treated me with respect and kindness even though I was a drunk piece of shit.I feel physically I'll when I see a liquor store now. Wish me luck.
>>28930Good for you. Taking the first step to sobriety is always the hardest part. But, once you get started on that path things will get easier. Hang in there and keep your head up. Be positive and optimistic about yourself and getting clean. No matter how hard things might get, never give up. In the end it'll be all worth it. Good luck.
It's been 23 days now. Can't wait for this week to go by so I can taper from 4mg to 2mg. As time goes on I keep getting closer and closer to becoming sober. Everything in my life is improving because I'm putting in the work to better myself. I am proud of myself and so is my family. They are so happy for me and it feels good to know that you're work and efforts are getting noticed and paying off. Hell yeah!
It's been 25 days, almost a month now. My meditation sessions have been better than ever and it's helping me immensely. I feel so grounded and in control of my whole life. I will keep going down the path I started on over a year ago. All the hard effort and work I'm willing to put in to become happy and successful will be worth it. I will keep growing as a person, being the best of a person that I can be.
It's been 27 days now. On Monday I will taper from 4mg to 2mg as it will be exactly a month since I got on suboxone. Then, I'll stay on 2mg for another month and then after that come completely off. I can't wait for that day to come. I'm gunning for it. I saw an old friend of mine yesterday who I haven't talked to in a couple years. He's doing really good for himself which I am proud of him for. He really has his shit together now. It felt really good seeing him again and made me really happy. I'm going to keep in touch with him and see if he wants to hang out and do stuff whenever he has the time. To be honest, everything he was telling me in terms of school and his life in general; he really inspires me and motivates me even more to change as a person and forever grow to be the best of a person that I can be. This old friend of mine might see me as that weak person that I use to be. But, he's in for a surprise when he sees that I'm a changed person.
I'm coming up on 14 months without a drink and it's been a year since smoking reefer.My last drink was the night I crashed into a tree on the way home from a bar. I know the community here isn't too religious but it was definitely a come to God moment for me. I was arrested for the fourth time (at the age of 23) and decided it was time to not try to stop drinking but actually do it. My family's the big driving factor for me; I was disgusted by how often I put them through worry and sadness over my drinking. I was also sick and tired of being sick and tired. The DTs sucked noodles but since then it's been the best year of my life, hands down.Keep it up, faggots. It truly does get easier with time and your perception of reality will change for the better after you've given your brain some much needed rest. If I can do it, you can too.
>>28962Damn, good for you dude. 14 months is huge. Keep going!
Day 29. Tomorrow makes exactly a month since I started suboxone. Now, I will be tapering from 4mg-2mg and staying on that dose for a month and then coming completely off the subs. I'm one step closer to getting clean. I've come this far and I'm not going back. Never again.
Month and a half. Fucking drug testing company is a subsidiary of a major company client. Nobody I work with, leadership included, is onboard with it, yet politically there's nothing we can do about it. Follow the money...
Today makes a whole month now. I am proud of myself and surprised that I made it this far. But, I'm stronger mentally and spiritually more than I ever have been. Tomorrow I'm going down to 2mg. I hope this lower dose works out well for me. I'm afraid to start having bouts of restless leg syndrome like I did last time when I only took 2mg daily. But, I think things will turn out well for me. I have all the faith in the world that I can do this successfully. Meditation over the past week has been incredible. I'm so much different than I was a month ago. I've grown so much in such little time. I'm going to keep improving upon myself and make a life for myself. I know I can do anything as long as I put my mind to it.
Okay out of hash but feeling nice and clean headed this evening. I know smoking it can help me kotch and not get bored but it can also make me cringe about really minor things I wouldnt normally care about, or get into bad thought patterns. Also Ive realised I need a detox from on screen violence its normalised by news, films and video games. I wake up and the first thing I see is stories of horrific shit. The other day I played Wolfenstein then binged on WW2 Nazi docs, shits unhealthy.
Coming up on 3 months without dxm. Feels good to be able to remember simple things again.And knowing what day of the week it is.
Day 31. Tapered down to 2mg today. No symptoms at all from taking a lower dose than I did before. Thank god. Now, i feel much better about being able to get sober and straight. I'm in a good place in my life at the moment. I'm happy and fortunate for who and what I have in my life. With that said, I'm going to keep pushing foward and even after I'm off the suboxone I will keep improving upon myself.
>>28983Keep it up dude, glad to see the steady progress!Personally I'm trying to not smoke weed, which gets pretty difficult when my roommate fucking loves smoking weed. Also I have 7-8 week old weed plants that I'd rather not just throw away. hopefully i can sell any weed that comes out of it to a friend or two for cheap just to recoup the costs for soil and pots. I'm so tired of all the internal bargaining that goes on every day in my head about whether or not I should smoke. I feel like i need to set up some kind of reward to give myself for not smoking, then maybe I would stop failing every time i try to quit.
>>28985Thanks. I don't think I could ever go without weed. It's like my medicine for my mental illnesses. It really keeps me grounded and leveled out. But, since you're trying not to smoke then more power to you. Good luck.
Along with tapering on suboxone, I'm quitting cigarettes very soon. My grandfather died of copd and my uncle has it and is on oxygen 24/7. I do not want to have the same fate as them and go out like that. I'm just slowly killing myself and it's going to stop.
Day 33. Doing alright with being on 2mg despite having a tiny bit of RLS. Only lasts for a few minutes once a day and then it goes away. Tomorrow I'm done with cigs and start vaping. I can't handle all the coughing and feel like I'm going to die. Not worth it. Your health is one of the most important things to take care of. So, no more of this.
2 weeks no weed. I'm sweating like crazy and feel really depressed. Really want to stop for real this time though. Post nasal drip sucks. Coughing up bloody snot sucks. I'm scared of the nightmares.
>>28992Good luck to you. I don't know if I could ever quit smoking. Weed keeps me grounded and leveled out. I use it for medicinal purposes and not just recreational. I would get mental side effects. But, no physical effects like you're going through. That must really suck. But, just keep plugging away and stay strong.
day 6 of no alcohol after almost 2 years of drinking every day. I drank 6-8 5% beers per night.main reason I'm quitting alcohol is due to the fact I've become a fat slob almost gaining 40 pounds since I started my new job, along with the fact alcohol FUCKS your sleep up so much.I'm not 100% sober because im still smoking weed, but the weed helped immensely those first 3 days of withdrawal. I smoked 1/2 an ounce in those 6 days but I finally am starting to feel normal. I feel really good because I'm actually getting sleep and I don't get random anxiety for no reason like I used to. Also my random paranoia from smoking weed went away the day after I quit drinking. I realized I was perpetually hung over and malnourished the last 2 years.
>>28994Best of luck to you. I honestly don't know how people can even become alcoholics. Drinking everyday and being hungover all the time really doesn't sound all that fun to me.
Day 36. So, it's been about a week since I tapered down to 2mg of suboxone. No more rls even though it was very minor of a symptom for me. Been meditating as usual and I also quit smoking cigarettes 2 days ago and started vaping. I will not end up dying like my grandfather did and now my uncle has copd and is on oxygen 24/7. I'm giving this everything I've got and am putting in a major effort to stay away from cigs. Six months from now I want to be done with nicotine period; no more vaping or taking in nicotine in any way, shape or form.
>>28993Thanks bro/sis. It's getting a little easier. I just keep telling myself that I have to do this. I want to be healthy. I want to be strong. I want to spend all the fucking weed money on something "cooler", like a car or something. I used to think that I could never/would never quit. But then I decided to go travelling a few weeks so no hookups etc. Also harsher weed laws. So that's my catalyst. I used to delude myself with the medicinal thing, but now I think it's bullshit. You should be able to be grounded and leveled out without using drugs.Also it really depends on how much you smoke. I smoked super heavily, probably 2-3g/day..
>>29001I would like to be able to quit smoking or just greatly cut back on it. But, right now I need it. But, I will eventually find a way to live without it or live without it for a few days or weeks in between smoking. I'd like to keep my time occupied so I don't think about it as much. I'm looking into taking GED classes later this year so I can take the test and then be able to go to college. That's just one thing that can occupy some of my time. Another thing I want to do is get a job. But, first I have to buy a car and get my license. Guess I better start saving up now.
Day 38. Surprisingly had a craving for pills for the first time last night since being on subs. But, I overcame it and just moved on. Temptation sucks sometimes. But, I know in the end it's not worth it so I stay away from it mentally and physically. This shows me that I'm stronger as a person than I was 38 days ago. I've come a far away and I'm not going to fuck it all up by giving in to just taking pills for "one last time". We all know what happens when someone's does that; relapse. I've relapsed many times and I'm not going to do it again. I'm a much different person than who I used to be.
Starting a program where they test for alcohol as well as other drugs. So now I'm totally sober and will be for 16 weeks. Previously was shitfaced but with no hard drugs. Wish me luck. Cigarettes are still an option but a crappy one.
Day 40. Damn, 40 full whole days has passed since I got on subs. I've come a far way since the first day. I should be done with my taper around the first week of May. After that I'll be completely sober (besides weed) and I'm not going to fall back into addiction. If I did then all the work I put in to get clean will have all been for nothing.Two nights ago I slipped up and took 20mg methadone. I didn't even enjoy myself while on that shit for a few hours. It made me remember why I chose to get clean and all the problems it caused me and my family. Never again will I slip up or even relapse. But, I don't exactly regret doing it because it's apart of my recovery. This moment has reinforced my mind and has me more self aware than I was. They say when someone relapses or slips up while going through a taper or detox, that it's apart of your recovery. It happens to everyone atleast once. That's why I'm not stressing out about it. To me, it's just a life experience that I learned from. That will be the very last time that I do something like that.
Day 41. Nothing much to say. But, day 45 will make it a month and a half since I got on subs. The days are just flying by and everything gets easier and better for me. Haven't had any cravings since Tuesday when I slipped up. That one last time has really reinforced my mind and my resistance and willpower to steer clear of that shit.I started a diet a few days ago. So far I've lost 5lbs in three days. I got 50+lbs to lose and I'm going to give this everything I got. I'm starting to feel "awakened" from within. My mind is so clear and sharpened. I'm starting to figure out what I want to do with my life; become a physical therapist or get involved in sports medicine. I want to be able to make a lot of money so I can help my mom out when she needs a helping hand. All my life she has struggled with money and still gave me what I wanted. She has been by my side through thick and thin. I want to return the favor by being a good son and make her happy. I will do anything for her and I'd go to the ends of the earth for her no matter what.
Day 43. My life is becoming more positive and I feel the "light" embracing me. The glass is always half full and not empty. I never feel down on myself anymore like I use to. Back when I was abusing opiates I had no confidence or self esteem whatsoever. Now, it's the total opposite. I'm in a good place in my life.
Day 45. It's been a month and a half since I got on subs and decided to get clean and sober. I can't believe I've made it this far. I'm proud of myself and I'm going to keep pushing on until I'm done my taper and be off the suboxone. After that's all said and done I'm going to focus on getting my GED and go to college and pursue a degree in physical therapy or sports medicine. The human body and its functions amaze me and fascinates me. I'd easily go through six years of school without regretting it as I'm going to need grants/loans to pay for school. Don't want to change my major and have to pay back all that money that went to waste getting into a sector of the medical field. Besides all that, everything is going good.
Day 46. Feeling good today. Nothing out of the ordinary. I'm just going to keep plugging away like I've been with everything in my life that I've been doing. My mind is completely clear now and no longer cloudy or foggy. The world seems so much different to me than what it use to look like before I got on subs. I'm starting to figure out what I want to do and achieve in life. I got high expectations for myself as I know I can keep getting better and better at what I do and focus on. Thank god or whoever or whatever for giving me a second chance at life. This time I will create, conquer, and what I aim to achieve no matter what what gets in my way.
Day 13 no dopeI feel okay. That's a big thing for me. I have energy. I forgot you could feel this way without taking opiates, or making the call to get some.I feel like I'm coming out of a major depressive episode. I quit my job and physically could not get any drugs. Physical withdrawals didn't get me, I was pretty much always in the mild stages anyway. I felt very suicidal for about, 11 days. The smallest thing would spring me into full self-attack mode. It makes sense. Opiates make all of my problems disappear, so my problems are going to feel very real when I come off them. At least I couldn't have killed myself, because my preferred method would be OD and I could not get any dope for the life of me.I just want to know when the dreams stop. I'm always hanging out with a dealer and they're about to give me drugs but keep jerking me around. Had one an hour ago where a guy I haven't talked to in months was gonna sell me some lean. I've never even had lean wtf.
>>29032Great job so far dude! I never did dope, just pills. But, nonetheless it's good that you're motivated and determined to get clean and change your life for the better. The physical symptoms will eventually go away. Keep up the good work bro! It'll all pay off for you soon enough. Just take everything day by day, step by step. Progress is a process and you must enjoy the process, the journey. Keep going dude!
>>29033Thank youI just can't believe I even started with this. I'm a part of the statistic of young people who got started on pills and jumped to heroin because it's cheaper. I tried it once to see what it's like and its all I did from that point.It would be so easy to fall back into it. I see what people say about triggers and stuff. From getting money to being locked in a one person bathroom to struggling to open a little bag, I can almost taste it.
3 months without dxm, and counting.I'd love nothing more than to down some robo and space to some music.When do the cravings actually stop?They get less intense each time, and they come less frequently now, but I'd love for them to go away entirely.
Day 49. In the next week and a half I'll be tapering down to 1mg. Keep that up for a month and then come completely off. It's almost been two months since I got on subs. Awesome feeling to know that you can do something as long as you put your mind to it. I have no more cravings which is really good. It's all smooth sailing from here.
Been sober (no alcohol, weed, stimulants, dissociatives like MXE and DXM, mild opis like codeine and various psychedelic drugs like LSD and DOM) for 80 days now. Can't say that I like it one bit. Can't wait for rehab / probation to be over so I can start using again. However, I'm proud that I've had the willpower to abstain for now. I wish you all the best.
>>29046That's almost three months. Damn you're farther along than I am. If I were you I would just stay sober (smoke weed erryday) and keep on going with making improvements in your life. You can do it brah!
>>29048Thanks for the encouragement. You can make it, too!Smoke weed errday
Day 50. I'm just a little over a week away from being on subs for two months. But, today I will celebrate this 50 day milestone by being outside and be around nature and people. I'm just embracing everything that I can that will make a positive impact in my life. I'm happy that I've come so far. But, the most important thing is how I've changed as a person over this course of time. I no longer need pills to use as a crutch or excuse to ignore my problems from within. I have faced my problems head on and have won my battles within my mind. Meditation has immensely helped me become the person who I am today. I'm not that weak and scared little boy that I once was. I can finally stand on my own two feet and face the world head on. My mind is sharpened and awake. I'm no longer engulfed in the dark abyss that I once couldn't get out of. I'm a much more happy and positive person than who I use to be. I have so little to lose and yet so much to gain. I might be getting a late start in life. But, it's never too late for anything that you want out of life. I will become happy and successful. Most of all, I'll become the person who I'm destined to become.
24h without smoking weed after toking errday for almost a yearI feel sad
>>29053Are you taking a t-break? I've been smoking everyday for two years and I'll never stop smoking.
>>29053me too, just hit the 24 hour mark. it's 3:30 in the morning and I can't fall asleep even though I'm dead tired. Have to take a break since I don't even enjoy getting high anymore. The last few weeks I just got really twitchy and anxious when I got high and my heart felt like it was going to stop at any second. Fuck, the weed was the only thing keeping me away from alcohol and other drugs, I thought I would never get tired of weed.
>>29055Nah, my lovely mother is staying for 2 weeks, which means I can't blaze the fuck up until my pockets are empty and my lungs collapse. Luv u mom, but damn, let yo boy get retarded. I mean shit....>>29056>it's 3:30 in the morning and I can't fall asleep even though I'm dead tiredThat's fucked up. It takes me a little longer to fall asleep when sober, but I don't get intense insomnia like you. My appetite is completely fucked up though. Yesterday I barely ate one full meal. It's frightening how little I eat when I am sober. Pass me a blunt and I'll eat a house, but I'm finna get malnourished when sober. Good luck, man!
>it's 3:30 in the morning and I can't fall asleep even though I'm dead tired
Day 52. I have no more cravings for opiates. Slipped up a couple times and after the last time I promised myself that I would never do it again and haven't since. No longer need to use opiates as a crutch for my problems in my mind. I smoke weed and that's the extent of it. I'd rather be a daily smoker than a daily opiate user. Happy spring everyone! We're all gonna make it!
Day 83 totally sober, no alcohol, no weed, no psys, no "other" drugs. I'm beginning to get used to being sober again, but I still can't say that I like it. Anxiety is high, irritability is high. Appetite is up in a bad way. Motivation to work out is down in a bad way. I am convinced that drugs made me a better, fitter, more motivated person and am ticked off to be stuck in court-ordered rehab. Fuck the propaganda. Without drugs, life is just laborious slavery and little rewards. Trying to take a Buddhist viewpoint on it and living simply without desire, but honestly I think psychedelics actually improved my emotional wellbeing, stimulants improved my fitness, and weed relieved my anxiety. The rest like codeine and MXE were just for shits and giggles. I find myself wishing I could convince the world of the value of these things as medicines for individuals like me but cynically believe that nobody would listen. In my life I have tried ( as far as I can remember):Peyote (Twice) San Pedro Cactus ( Many times ) Methylbuphedrone ( For a solid month or so )Ecstasy ( A few times )Ethylone ( Many times )4-ACO-DMT ( A few times ) 4-HO-MET ( Once )5-MEO-DMT ( A few times )MIPT ( Once )DMT (Many times )Cannabis in many forms ( Errday for like 8 years )Promethazine Codeine ( Many times )Demerol ( For like a few months )DOI ( Twice )DOM ( Twice )MXE ( For a month or so )DXM ( Many times )1P-LSD ( Twice )LSD ( Once )Etizolam ( Once )Mescaline powder ( Once )Allylescaline ( Once )Amphetamine ( Many times )Dexedrine ( A few times )Alcohol ( Socially )DPH (hurr durr once recreationally, often for prescribed purpose ) Mushrooms ( Many times )3-MEO-PCP ( Once )Ephedrine ( Habitually as part of fitness stack )Clenbuterol ( For like a month )Yohimbine ( Habitually as part of fitness stack )I can see how this could be construed as a drug problem. But on the other hand, I believe my experiences on these drugs made me a stronger person. The psychiatric drugs I am on now (seroquel and lithium) do jack shit to help me cope with the horrors of my life. I just wish society would accept drug users as a lifestyle choice instead of forcing us to conform. I feel I was more productive and a greater contributor ON drugs than OFF of them. Now I just have crippling depression, anxiety and PTSD. I've gained 10 lbs and feel miserable. Sex and food are all I look forward to. I have zero hope for the future or my former career in engineering. Anyway, I just needed to vent. I don't think my habits constituted an addiction since most of the drugs weren't that habit forming, and the ones that were I kicked many years ago. It's easy to stay off of them physically but life still feels miserable without them emotionally. My doctors say I was 'self-medicating' with weed, but the medication they give me to do the same job is just bullshit. "And the pills your mother gives you don't do anything at all." Modern medicine really ought to take a good long look at itself and realize that people self-medicate because their own drugs do jack shit to help the symptoms of depression, anxiety and PTSD. I'm sick and tired of doctors and people telling me that I was stupid for self-medicating when their own treatments don't do jack shit.Anyway, I'm sure I can make it sober all the way through rehab and a few months necessary to keep things cool before I start using again. I just hope I'm smarter this time and won't get caught. Best of luck to you all.
>>29059We're with you 1hunnid, bro. Some people need to be sober for their wellbeing, but people like you do it for your wellbeing. With that said, don't emphazise drugs too much. No fun that you are a different person without drugs :/
>>29059I can see where without weed you'd feel irritable and depressed. I get that way too when I'm dry. Your doctors can go eat a dick. So, weed is bad for you and yet it's legalized in multiple states. Yet, they put you on lithium and say that's okay? I know if you take lithium you have to get blood work done quite often. I'd rather smoke weed than take a medication that could kill me. My doctor put me on zyprexa in place of lithium. Works just fine. I still smoke weed as I feel self medicating with a plant based drug is better for me and keeps me grounded and leveled out. Doctor tried telling me that weed is bad. Yet, I'm still smoking because I know what's best for me. How much do you want to bet a lot of these doctors smoke weed and still have the audacity to say that weed is bad and you shouldn't be self medicating? Fuck them.
>>29061Yeah, I wish I lived in a legal state. Weed is much better medicine for keeping me calm and on the level than toxic metals for sure.>>29060I've used them for so long, I guess they became a part of me and my personality. They were definitely a part of my daily life. Thanks for the support. I'm hoping I can make it through the next year until the eyes are off me so I can at least smoke weed again. I'll probably steer clear of the harder drugs for the time being just to keep the stress to a minimum.
Day 87. Smoking like a chimney, the one vice still allowed for some reason.
Hey Ranty. The medicinal industry don't want you healed up. Only your self can heal you up. Entheogens may help you if you are in the right set of sate of being and open to surrendering completely to however it wants you to be. Peyote kills the weak. Mary Jane does her thing, LSD can kill your brain cells and, probably, the shrooms are the most 'humane' to communicate with, or best guides. I have heard ayahuasca is the best healer in the world of plant remedies.All drugs are bad, mmkay? (Sorry, had to)Let go and let god. You are not sick. You probably just believe in your own suffering and thus have a really bad time. Take care. Stop believing in the chems for real. You are a perfect being, and you need to tap into that if you wanna get better. Peace and love are the only things that truly matter.Peace and love. To your self.
>>29080 Replying to >>29059 This guy.
>>29080I've taken Ayahuasca ttwice.If all drugs are bad, I should stop my psychiatric meds, too.
>>29080I don't believe in God. Sorry.
First week of Smug Month 2017 completed! Only 4 more weeks to go.Seriously guys, being smug really makes not doing drugs easy peasy.
Day 55. Just five more days to go until I hit two months clean. On April 1st I'm going down to 1mg suboxone. I will stop taking subs as of May 1st. Good timing as I'll be clean completely from anything (besides weed) just in time for summer. On Sunday I'm going back to the gym and losing the rest of this weight and starting on a diet. I'm also looking into taking GED prep classes over the summer so I can get take the test asap and just be making it in time to able to sign up for college courses in the fall. If I don't make it in time then I'll start college classes next spring. I've been thinking a lot and I want the best for myself out of life. I can't wait to get a start on everything as it'll make me happy and also gives me something(s) to look foward too. I'm more optimistic than usual. I know I can achieve my goals as long as I put in the work. I'm going to keep grinding and accomplish what I want to set out to do.
Now one week sober after quitting weed. Don't even have any cravings, even though I still have a decent amount of weed lying around. It's like I'm a totally different person, my anxiety is gone, I can suddenly talk to people, I'm extremely motivated and productive, worked out a lot this week and my depression is gone, just like that.What the fuck guys, I thought I smoked to treat my depression, but did weed actually cause my depression? I still can't describe how much better I feel now.
I'm off for yet another piss test and I'm definitely gonna pass. Thanks for all of the support. The hard part now is just producing urine on demand. I'm guzzling coffee and iced tea, I've got about an hour or so.
Yesterday was my last day smoking weed, for real this time. I told everyone that I'm not doing it any more and I need clean piss to get a job. I'm glad I planned it this way. My gf and I are both quitting for my one week spring break, and we're going camping for my birthday tomorrow. With all the rain we've had this winter, it's going to be so pretty. It's nice to feel confident about quitting for once. Some of my friends will want to smoke while camping, but as long as my gf and I encourage each other, we should be able to stay away from it.Now I just have to figure out what to do with my weed plants and silly weed pictures
>>29086>>29088Good stuff guys. I think I could never quit smoking. I use weed medicinally for my mental issues. But, I've gotten a lot better over the past year from doing more than just sitting around and getting stoned. I sometimes think to myself that I'd like to quit. But, for now I'm just going to do smoke and get my life in order. When my time is occupied by school and a job, I won't be even thinking about toking. Maybe I'll still smoke. Who knows?
Fuck, I thought that I'm finally over my ex after three months. Felt like a normal functional human being again. Now that I've stopped smoking weed I'm dreaming again and every fucking night I dream about my ex. Either we're somehow back together and she cheats on me, or I meet her at some random place and she became a total slut or she taunts me about her new boyfriend (even though she's still single), always some fucking bullshit. Every morning I wake up completely angry or depressed, those dreams are ruining my whole day, I can't even stop thinking about them. This morning I got so angry I smashed several plates and broke some other stuff in my room, I'm so angry, frustrated and just want to break something. Fuck. I'm so tempted to start smoking again, just so the dreams will finally stop, every single night for the last three weeks. Sorry for the rambling, just needed to vent.
>>29091Why did you quit smoking? Maybe you should start up again? I'm going through something similar. But, my dreams aren't about a girl or anything like that. It's about people who I haven't seen in years and some of them were just complete dicks. I was waking up in a bad mood every morning. But, the dreams aren't as "severe" as they were about a week ago. Saw a lot of fucked up shit in those dreams that had to do with these certain people. So, I just started smoking again and I'm doing fine. Weed helps me with staying grounded and leveled out. Weed isn't bad. Fuck those assholes who says otherwise.
>>29091I would smoke if I could.I have now been drug free for 90 days. My brain still feels fried. Cigarettes help with the anxiety and irritability, but they're also a disgusting habit. For the rages, I guess I have the mood stabilizers my shrink prescribes me, but I doubt I'd break things. Something else must be up. Don't worry, man, plenty of fish in the sea. Marijuana never interrupted my dream cycles although I hear it does that in some people and you must be one of them. Maybe you could go to the doctor and get some medicine instead, if you really don't want to smoke.
>>29093Damn three months sober? Great shit right there. Good job. I'm comingUp on 60 days in the next couple days. Let's keep going! We're all gonna make it!!
>>29094I hate it. I can't wait for the weekly urine tests to stop so I can go back to smoking weed at least, or for it to become legal and for it not to matter. Although they test me for alcohol, too, so I imagine I wouldn't be cut loose until the end of all of this bullshit.I will not have a VOP on my record, I will wait till it all blows over and then move far away or maybe to a legal state and chill.
Day 59. Tomorrow will make two months. I've come so damn far and I will never look back. I will admit, in the past two weeks I've slipped up a few times. But, after last night I will never again touch this shit. Why the fuck am I regressing back and letting myself go back to my old ways? I was so close to just throwing those pills down the toilet. But, I gave in. It's so much like having an angel and devil on your shoulders. I feel ashamed and feel like I let myself down. What a shitty feeling this is. After how far I've come and I'm just throwing it all away just for some high. Really? Well all I can do now is put it in the past and just when I feel the cravings coming on I'll just smoke weed. That's what I should've done all those other times that I gave in to my cravings. But, I'm okay overall and am just going to move foward from this.Tomorrow comes two months. So fucking stoked!
>>29097Don't sweat slip ups, just don't let them happen again. If it makes things easier, have somebody test you like a rehab program and hold you to it. What drug are you trying to kick exactly? Some klind of pill? Benzos? Opis? That can be tough, but you can make it, you have the will.Weed is a great treatment for opi withdrawls in conjunction with medication, you can do it.
>>29098I'm kicking my opiate habit and that's the only thing I was addicted too. I smoke weed and that's all I need. I'm currently on suboxone and am tapering down to 1mg on Thursday. Yeah, no more slip ups. I'm glad you guys can understand what I'm dealing with ATM.
Wrapping day 2 of experimenting with being clean and sober. Mostly doing it to set my head back on straight, I'm going in knowing it won't last forever this time so I have it easier than most people ITT. Not sure how long it will last, I set a week at least as my goal but the first week is the hardest so who knows. This is kind of the first real day since yesterday I still had a decent afterglow from what I did the day before. Only thing that keeps me doing it is that I know when I finally do go back to using it will be that much better.
Day 60. Finally, two months sober as of today. I am so proud of myself and really happy that I've made it this far. Now, just one more month to go and I'll be off the subs entirely. Going down to 1mg tomorrow. All the work I've put in to stay sober has made me more mature and has me growing as a person. No more slip ups as of three days ago and I'm never letting myself do that again.
Day 93. I've got the greater part of a year of this ahead of me, I wonder when I will lose count of the days. I long for the day I'm cut loose enough to at least drink alcohol again, although I suspect I will have to watch it on weed since now I have a record. I live in NYC. I am praying and hoping that one of the two marijuana legalization bills will pass this year, but I'm not optimistic because of the conservative bent certain parts of the state and city have. Massachusetts gives me hope. I don't think I will experiment with drugs nearly as extensively after all of this, but I do still want my weed back. It just always made me feel like everything was going to be alright. I have my girl and family to live for I guess. I've been playing video games and they're starting to feel fun again, but no where near as pleasurable as when drugged. I used to play the game "Lineage 2" while tripping bizzalls, the graphics aren't next generation now but it was still fun and free. I played other MMOs with my girl but that was our go-to game since it was free. Now it just looks like lame playstation 2-tier graphics instead of the HD hallucination-augmented graphics on shrooms, DOI, DOM and LSD. So I've switched to Starcraft, which is more of a thinking man's game anyway.Sex is still fun, but I still miss the mind-blowing sex on drugs. She does, too (she's going clean as well). Sorry in advance to all the wizardchan users.When I first quit all drugs (and I used a lot of different ones) my appetite went through the roof and I gained ten pounds. Now I'm finally getting back into the swing of exercise and eating right again. So that's a plus. I miss weed. I miss DMT, lucy and shrooms, and all their buddies. I don't miss the dissos as much although they were fun. The opi I kinda miss but had been off of for a while so I don't want to go back. Stims I miss, but they're more tools than recreational drugs in my opinion.Anyway, ranty is ranty as usual. Good luck to all you /detox/ers.
>>29109Already sounds like you're getting adjusted to being sober and appreciative of life. Just keep going and keep plugging away. It gets easier by the day. Youre farther along than me.
>>29110Thanks, you keep it up, too! I still really miss drugs, I have like "drug attacks" where I think of relapsing, but the consequences are what keeps me clean.
>>29111I just got over my cravings as of two days ago. I did slip up. But, not like total relapse. Cravings suck.
>>29112Yeah, they do. Just keep fighting them, man, you can kick it.
>>29113Yeah that's all I can do. Weed usually takes the cravings away. Atleast for me it does. I've come too far to fuck up now.
Day 95. Still here, still alive, still sober, still hating it. Intense cravings for weed, but not withdrawal or anything lame and non-existent like that. I dream about drugs a lot, and sometimes in my dream I realize I'm not supposed to be doing drugs and panic myself awake. Like dreaming you're smoking a bowl and then waking up in a panic that you're gonna fail your next piss test. Other than that, I'm actually doing OK.
Day whatever, I don't know. About a month since I did heroin or any opiate.My social anxiety has gotten a lot worse. My depression has gotten worse, too. Finding it hard to do anything that doesn't have instant gratification.No job still. I'm around my parents a lot more and I'm realizing how fucked up and unhappy they are. I don't want to be anything like them. I want to move out, but I don't think I'd be able to sustain myself, or stay away from drugs if I lived in town.I have absolutely no plans for the future. I need to get my GED but Khan Academy makes me feel like a fucking idiot and I don't remember the stuff I do.I can still taste heroin when I have a runny nose. Not having many dreams about it anymore, but I had one the other night where my dealer/friend came over but wouldn't talk to me.Still ugly, covered in acne and slightly deformed. Just thinking about myself makes me want to do some H and forget for awhile. I don't have any friends that support/care about my abstinence. My brother is doing meth and dope almost every day and shows no signs of sadness or depression. Makes me jealous.
>>29121You need some kind of motivation beyond getting your GED to focus on to stay clean. Do you work? Do you plan on getting a job? Do you still live with your birth family? How about friends, do you have friends that are supportive?It might be pretty hard to stay off dope if you're always around your brother doing it, but it's not impossible. Like I said, you just need a motivation to focus on. The GED sounds like a good start.
>>29122I'm not motivated to do anything. My GED isn't going to matter when I'm gonna be a shelf stocker/line cook for the next 10 years anyway. Work doesn't interest me, but I should be saving up so I can move out I guess. I'm conflicted because I want to move out, but moving out would mean holding a steady job no matter what. Also it would mean paying bills, when I could potentially work AND stay at home rent-free, which seems stupid to give up because you don't like the people you live with.I just have no energy for anything. When I work, I'm miserable all day (unless I'm on opiates) then I come home as fast as possible and just go to sleep (unless I'm on opiates.) I don't have any friends at all.I know it's possible to work, take care of your home/self AND study for college or something, but that seems fucking impossible to me. I'm not like that.I've come to terms with the fact that I'll never be able to kill myself, but it feels the only thing I'm capable of anymore.
>>29123First of all, don't kill yourself. You're just going through a rough patch, there will be plenty of good times later. There's the Radiohead song High and Dry. "The best thing you ever had has gone away." It's going to be tough but don't give up.Second, you gotta build a support network. That means making friends who will form meaningful relationships with you. If you have a hobby, try to find friends who enjoy the same hobby. I'd stay at home until you at least get your GED or maybe even college. It just makes sense economically, unless it's really bad and you want to move out. The GED is just a stamp on your record, it doesn't really mean anything. A high school degree doesn't mean anything either. But employers will filter you out in the screening process alone if you have neither. Sucks, but true. I'd stay at home, avoid dope, maybe talk to your brother and ask him to do it in private if he's smoking/shooting where you can see. You gotta have a dream or a hope for the future. Otherwise, it all just becomes bleak and hopeless. Maybe a career where you can advance vocationally to earn more money. You could maybe save up for a downpayment on a condo or house and live like a boss. That's a goal. You could also go to a doctor and maybe get some psychiatric meds for the depression, although your mileage may vary on those. If you tell them you're a recovering addict, they may have other meds to help you out, too.Good luck.
Day 64. Started on 1mg suboxone today. So far so good. Not much to say. But, the days are flying by and I'll be completely done with subs before you know it. I'm putting all this behind me and going on with my life.
Day 67. Feeling good and I feel better than ever. I'm about to sign up for GED prep classes real soon and take my test after my classes are over. Can't wait to start this process and work hard for that piece of paper. After that, start applying for college courses and get grants to pursue my degree. I want to be involved in physical therapy or some sector of sports medicine as my career.It's time to start the rest of my life and live happy and successful.
Day 100. 100 days sober, another big milestone. I have a court date coming up, and I'm squeaky clean, so I expect things to go well. I hope they go better than expected. Almost no craving for weed anymore since I sort of understand now that it will be a very, very long time before I can experience it again. I don't wish for psychedelics right now because I'm almost certain it would be a bad trip given my current mind. I wish I could drink alcohol, I think it's unfair to force someone to not use a legal drug just because they got caught with illegal drugs, but it's part of the rehab program. I've pissed in a cup every week - sometimes twice a week - so far. I'm hoping I can make it to early January next year and at least celebrate the end of the rehab program with a beer. I have a feeling I'll be monitored closely afterwards by even some friends and family so I'm going to keep a low profile until mid-next year. At least I still got my woman. Stay strong, everybody, and stay motivated.
Clean and sober for over 2 years now, before that I struggled with an opiate addiction for about 3 years. Trust me, boys. It gets easier. To the guys above me that are like 70 days and 100 days sober (really anyone else trying to get clean, for that matter), stick with it. The bad feels are bad but they're only temporary and then you're free from it all and can live happily without this shit holding you back.
So I run out of weed yesterday after a friend gave me some for free. I scraped some of the thc dust as well in a bowl. got high and went really OCD. Weed can amplify fucked up delusional ways of thinking for me. I might give it a long break until I get too highly strung and give in again. Im trying to do drums and treadmill everyday before work which is also physical. I dont drink like I used to and avoid drugs mostly. Every so often I might have a blow out and then not do it again for months. My emotions can be mixed but I want to know if this just life or drugs. Id be interested to know if Ive fucked my serotonin in anyway from using drugs, but then the most coke Ive ever done in one night is half a gram and the most MDMA 1g ..sometimes I would do E every week or two over a short while until my shit fucked up. and Ive mucked around with occasional minor benzo abuse. I dont think any of things would be enough to do long term damage. Ive always been a bit crazy anyway which is why I shouldnt do drugs. Found this for anyone wanting to chat with some ppl http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/
Three weeks sober from weed now. Drinking A LOT less. Since my last acid trip I can suddenly stop drinking when I want to and don't have to drink compulsively until I pass out. Have less anxiety and can talk to people like a normal human being. I feel like a completely different person. Life is going great. Have been more productive than I have been in years. Working out a lot, eating healthy, have a regular sleep pattern. I just can't believe how much time I wasted over the last four years, maybe I'm really gonna make it. I'm just scared I'm going to crash sometime in the future and the cycle will begin anew.
>>29078Because bill w smoked the founder of modern rehabSo it's ok because it was in 1939 or whateverGod can cure any addiction aside from nicotine of course
>>29139Talk to a doctorI tried stuff like on that link, 12 step etcDoes nothing but make you insane. Doctor helped me with the imbalance chemicallyThen it all became easier12 steps is a waste of time/money/life
3 months clean from a daily meth addiction. It's still very hard to get out of bed. I think about going out and getting more all the time. I can focus on anything and I have trouble feeling good like I used to.
>>29146That's fairly normal for 3 months clean. Stick with it. You're getting a lot closer to the point where you'll feel actually normal again. I'd say 6 months (in total, not 6 months from now) until you feel like you're really getting your general mindset/focus back (still might have the odd craving here or there buy they WILL fade the longer you stay clean) and maybe about a year to really get your energy back, depending on what you're doing right now. The process will feel a lot quicker if you're exercising and eating right though. After I dropped opiates it was fucking insane to me how much energy I lost during that time. Like, I was a good 6 months clean and it felt like a fucking struggle to even lift my blankets and shit to make my bed. Like almost any movement I made took a lot of energy out of me. Then I started eating better and getting some exercise, building myself up a bit, and everything has been fine since. The cravings have long passed and I feel about as normal as I did before I ever touched opiates. Seriously, stick with it. You will feel good again without drugs. I promise. It's just a matter of time.
>>29145I agree that 12 step is some brainwashing bullshit, and is a total waste of time and money for something you can absolutely accomplish on your own, but I guess it works for some people. Too bad they won't stop preaching to you about their "higher power" and shit later on, though.
>>29148If I hear "Let go and let God" one more time, I think I will puke. >>29144I'm just glad they aren't trying Belladonna still, I found it dicking around in the BIll W. wikipedia article.https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Charles_B._Towns#The_Belladonna_CureI actually ended up trying to quit smoking again, but not for any reason except it's fucking expensive and I'm on a shoestring budget now. I'm coincidentally on Wellbutrin so maybe that's helping.Anyway, day 103 I guess. If I stop caffeine now, I will be the most sober man on the planet. If my life ween't in ruins around me, I'd probably be saying something about enjoying being sober now, but the drugs and alcohol really helped me cope with the sadness and depression. That being said, I really appreciate all the encouragement people on this board have made and want to return some of it. We can do it!
Day 70. I'm not doing as good as I've been doing. I slipped up and took opiates twice this week. It happened last week too. But, all I can do is put this behind me and keep on going with my goal of getting clean and sober and stop fucking up. I honestly don't know why I did what I did. But, I do have a great support system from my family and from you guys on this board. Their really is no excuse for what I did. I feel like an idiot for letting myself do this as far as I've come in the past two months. But, it is what it is and I know better now than to slip up another time. I can't progress in life if I just keep popping pills. So, no more slip ups. Time to truly move foward and work on myself and get my shit together.
Did something stupid (mixed klonipins w/ heroin) and ended up nodded out on the side of the road with a bag full of caps. Got picked up by the cops and rushed to the E.R. I guess this is the end of my 3 year opiate journey. I just want to kill myself right now rather than listen to all of the family drama that will come with it along with my career likely being ruined.
>>29151I hear you, buddy. I had a seizure after a heroic dose of DOI and ended up in the hospital and in trouble because of the weed and shit I had in my house. It's gonna be tough but you can get through it. I hope you have a good lawyer.
Day 108. I've now quit smoking nicotine cold turkey, resulting in some discomfort but it's managable. The only mind altering substances I use are my medications and caffeine. It's a completely different lifestyle and I think it's really boring. I have crippling ennui and depression which I am taking Wellbutrin for at the maximum dosage of 450 mg daily which might also be helping with the smoking. I have difficulty focusing and concentrating, but they won't prescribe me ADD meds because of my drug history (my shrink is affiliated with my court-ordered rehab program). I'm on the tightest budget I've ever been on, so I can't even indulge on food, although that's been very good for my weight loss. When I stopped drugs, I initially gained about 10 pounds, maybe from the new medication or from depression, but I'm taking them off now. Sex and old vidya games is about the only thing to look forward to now. There's a light at the end of this tunnel I hope.
Day 77. I decided as of today that no longer am I going to fuck up and keep slipping up. Over the past week I've been struggling with keeping my cravings down. I gave in and kept getting high. Honestly, only did it once a day over a week. I'm not using that as an excuse. It's bad enough. But, as of now I am going to get 100% clean and become totally sober from opiates. This shit isnt worth it. I know that. I took my regular suboxone dose of 1mg earlier. I must have purpose in my life and targets I want to hit. I'm going back on my diet and going back to the gym on Monday and lose this weight. I made a promise to myself and my doctor that the next time I walk into his office that he will see healthier and better person and a new person at that. I haven't been meditating over the past two weeks. Going to start that back up after Easter. I will become the person who I'm destined to become.
>>29167We believe in you
7 days, im the disso chick from that other thread. honestly, this is going to be easy until the 6th month mark, i think.
>>29167Good man, I was an opi addict for a long time. That shit is far from worth it.I've seen the progression in every form, in all kinds of different people.I've seen it take the lives of even "moderate" users. My best friend liked to do H every now and then, and one time he got hit with some fentanyl bullshit, and bam it's all over. GG.Just stick with it man. I went through a period, probably a couple years where I really wanted to get clean but just slipped up over and over again. It was really demoralizing. But eventually you just get to a point where you can actually think straight and weigh the consequences. You just have to have enough time and a clear mind to actually be able to think about those decisions right.When you're in the shit, and you start getting cravings, it totally shuts off the rational center of the brain. The impulse/reflex/instinct part of your brain is rewired to get you that dope no matter the cost, so the addict brain ignores all rationality when making those kinds of decisions.It takes a little bit of time to get healed enough that you can think straight. Just keep sticking with it, and it gets better.I've been clean for a couple years now and my body feels great. It still hurts to think about friends lost, and all the people I know that are still struggling day to day to stay high, but that's on them. You keep doing you, stay thinking clear and being healthy in body and mind and you'll get everything you need. Even if we don't become wealthy, or hugely successful in other ways, we're still leading a better life than being chained down by an addiction that saps your happiness, willpower, and energy.
>>29196the 5g dck that i thought was lost/seized (and that my vendor refunded me after i told them i was going to "quit research for the good of my business" (good guy vendor, thumb up) showed up today. like, are you fucking kidding me.so fucking salty about it. whatever, its flushed. had to willpower thru it. really upset though, part of me wanted that shit SO FUCKING BAD. hate being an addict
>>29201boyfriend was encouraging me to do it, said IT NEVER EXISTED (since i got refunded)that was a rough 45 minutes or whatever of wanting to slam my head into a wall, but honestly, its....already feeling like it didnt. its nice.
No heroin in three months. Had the worst dream earlier.I had found a tiny bag of white on my floor and instantly took off to the bathroom. Poured it on my phone screen and realized I had no card to cut it and nothing to snort it through. Went to get up and spilled some on my shirt. Sat there trying to get it out somehow until I woke up.So vivid and not even a taste. I'd do it again any day honestly.
>>29201Damn, that's impressive. Good for you.
I quit smoking weed a while ago, not sure how long it's been. I still feel like I'm high all the time. My short term memory is nonexistent and I feel like I'm in a haze all the time. I'm worried I permanently fried my brain. I was dabbing like an eighth a week at the end and it had been going on for almost 2 years this time. I smoked myself retarded no doubt about it. I'm just nowhere near as smart as I used to be. The isolation probably had something to do with it too but I know that being permanently stoned for that long can't have been good for me. Please let my brain come back, I don't want to be this retarded forever.
>>29210It's very likely your brain is just ''out of practice''. It's a little rusty for your newly sober state and the tasks that requires. Look into neuroplasticity, the brain shapes itself to optimally do whatever it's most frequently used to doing. After years of being high all the time, it's reasonable to consider that your brain's structure and neural pathways shifted in a manner to facilitate the frequent amount of time it spends in an inebriated state. Plus if you were smoking a ton and decided on quitting, I'm gonna go on a limb here and say that you were being unproductive and lazy in some way too, and probably weren't exercising your brain with complex tasks or activities requiring focus either.Luckily this means that with prolonged sobriety and regular practice mentally stimulating activities, you'll eventually end up feeling alert and focused.I'd recommend regular exercise and daily meditation if you want to feel back on track as quickly as possible, but try and work out your brain in various ways. being confronted to new knowledge and new experiences helps strengthen brain cells. read books, try and learn a language, take a zumba class or something, whatever you want man. Just get up and try and do something. Being more active rather than passive is the key to maintaining sobriety. Life is probably not gonna fix your problems or make you content unless you yourself take shit into your own hands. Good luck, and grab life by the fucking balls man. It feels great.
OP hereI relapsed a couple weeks ago which I severely regret doing. But, I've been back on suboxone for a few days. Going to stay on it for a month and hopefully be done with it after that. I'm meditating again and keeping up with my hygiene. Going back to the gym on sunday and I'm going to lose the rest of this weight. I've had a whole year to think about my life and myself. Now, I know what I must do and take action. Don't think about it, be about it. That's what I've learned.
>>29222keep it up dude! you can do it! your progress was inspiring. I haven't smoked the kush since 4/20 and It really feels like I'm over it. I'd better be since I need a job when I graduate in June. It's amazing you've done so well with such a hard drug to quit. Have a silly image.
>>29223I'm glad I could help you with your sobriety by staying dedicated to this thread and posting daily so you could see how I was progressing. If I can help just one person such as yourself then that makes me happy. Keep it up with your sobriety from weed. I'm actually having thoughts of quitting myself. Post your progress in here as I do. I'm sure you could help some people fighting the same fight as you are.
So, it's been exactly a week since I started taking subs. Things are different than they were before. I have a new outlook on life and I'm the happiest I've ever been. The glass is always half full rather than half empty. I'm going to make it in life no matter what it takes. I will not let my mental ailments dictate who I am. I'm forever changing into a happier person who has so much to look forward too and I will not falter this time. I won't give up so easily like I did last time. I have so many goals and and targets that I want to hit and achieve.looking forward to all these opportunities that are coming up in my life gives me purpose. It feels good.
Day 9 of being on suboxone.I'm feeling pretty good lately. But, I had a panic attack yesterday and had to go to the hospital. I got some Xanax prescribed to me before I see my psychiatrist today. Going to see if he can put me on a benzo for no longer than 1 month. I was really bad with klonopin back in the day. Haven't touched a benzo in over 2 years until now. I could take the rest of my script and get fucked up. But, I'm beyond that bullshit and I'm better than that. I was put in a hospital for drug abuse 5 years ago. After that I didn't and still don't want anything to do with anxiety meds. But, sometimes shit happens and you have to do what you feel is best for yourself. All in all I have no worries about being addicted to benzos again. I'm a lot wiser and smarter now and have my head on straight. I'll make it through this just fine. I can do it, I know I can.Other than that I'm doing good with everything else in my life. Just about everything is looking up all around me and within me.
I feel like I can't function without opiates.I haven't had any in four months. There have been good days, but I've wanted to kill myself for the most part. Everything about my life is fucked, especially me.I'm getting another job soon and hopefully a connection. I'm going to be happy again, for a little while. I want to drown in pills and dope.
Day 14. It's been 2 weeks since I got on subs. Everything is looking good for me as I keep making changes to myself and my life. I cut back on smoking weed. Only smoke 2-3 times a day instead of smoking every damm hour. When the rest of this weed is gone I'm quitting completely. I'd like to save my money and use it for better things in life. Weed was just a crutch I used to get by. But, I no longer need it. I'm doing a lot better this time around with making more changes to myself and my life like I did before. SLAYER!
I smoked weed on Sunday after abstaining for nearly a month. Feels kinda bad. But really smoking weed once in a month is pretty responsible use, even if I do need clean piss when i graduate college in 5 weeks. I'd like to be able to smoke just rarely - once a month or so at max, and just homegrown. However, I feel like I won't really be able to enjoy it fully, or at least it will take a new mental viewpoint. I've really convinced myself smoking is something bad now, and I really feel guilty about it even though an occasional escape is hardly an awful thing. I've been doing such a good job lately too.Once I graduate, I'll move somewhere with my girlfriend and have a job and be a real workin' adult, and grow some shrooms. /psy/ is nice because, at least for me, it's something I can do once and not really want to do again for at least a month or two, usually longer.I'm a little buzzed, I apologize for the rant that went off topic but it feels good to get it out.
>>29237Good job keep it up brah! I've cut back significantly smoking weed. Use to smoke all day everyday. But, I only smoke 2-3x a day. You're doing better than me with this. Keep going. I could learn a thing or two from you. I'm currently on suboxone and I'm a bit over two weeks into my taper. Just you alone motivate me to do better and achieve what I want to accomplish in life. SLAYER!
a few weeks ago I smoked after like 5 months of abstaining to see how it'd affect my HPPD. Didn't help at all and made me a little worse, but I've gotten better since then. I still need more time before I'll be back to normal but I'm definitely never going to smoke again.
I've been off of synthetic opioids for about 4 months, but can't fucking keep myself away from alcohol. The corner store is so close, and it's so inexpensive. I feel better mentally compared to opiatetimes, but my body is degrading with cigarettes and booze. Ah, fucking hell, life is odd.
Day 16!I fucked up big time. I'm pregnant. I could never get clean for myself, but for my child I am going to get my shit sorted out. As cold turkey as I can without killing myself. There's no way I am going to fuck up my baby's life just because I'm a screwup.No girls on the internet and everything, but this is something I really have to confess. I want people to yell at me and tell me to do better and to clean my shit up for someone else's sake.
>>29237me again. I haven't smoked but I've been pretty tempted. Once I have a job and don't need to be sober it really seems like I'll go back to smoking. It'll be a lot more under control, one hopes, but it's hard to see where it will go. It really seems like everyone I care about smokes weed. Of course it isn't everyone, but most of my good friends do, especially the only ones I ever get to see. The more I type about it the less true it seems. Shit's hard either way yo.>>29242shit dude that is no bueno. What a terrible curse. I would never want a child even under good circumstances (it's pretty much the worst thing you can do to the environment), so I can't imagine getting pregnant under not-so-great conditions. Best of luck, all I can offer in help is a silly image or two.
>>29242DO BETTER AND CLEAN YOUR SHIT UP, YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE A KID NOW, YOU CAN'T BE SELFISHLY GETTING HIGH ALL THE TIME!That work?
>>29241I hit 30 months clean from heroin a couple days ago. Started drinking about a year ago. I'll NB this because I'm drinking now. There are two paths that the recovering /opi/ addict can take when it comes to drinking. On your left, you have eventual relapse. Drinking might not be the bees knees for you. Heroin might seem a lot better. It's not sustainable when the thing you want is also just as easy to get. More people seem to follow this path than anything. On your right, you have casual to habitual drinking. I keep it to 2-3 times a week. I always liked booze. It's socially acceptable. It feels nice. It helps me sleep. Some of my fellow recovering /opi/ addicts are complete boozehounds now, however.I know you wrote this post almost a month and a half ago, but godspeed.I don't know where I'm going with this.
>>29242Children are wonderful and the absolute worst, but if you want to have the baby, then you want to be the best mother you can be. Being 100% there for them, even before birth, is the best thing you can do for them and yourself.I'm not going to yell at you to clean up. I'm just going to say that having a child is the best reason in the entire world to get/stay sober. They are the best reason.Bumping because I've gone off the rails with /dis/ and alienated my wife and friends in the last few weeks. Going to an NA meeting later today for the first time in 3 years. Normally I prefer SMART meetings, but whatever. My wife is coming with me because she wants to know how to help me, and she simply doesn't know what to do these days. She's so supportive it's amazing though. Much gratitude to her.
>>29243>>29255>>29286Thanks for the support, y'all. This is a baby I plan on keeping, because I'm married and I know it's his. Bringing a kid into this world, even a horrible world like this one... well, I hope I can do right by them. I'm going to do everything I can.
Started on suboxone today. Feeling good and optimistic about it this time around. Started on 2mg and everything is okay so far, no cravings or WD symptoms. I'm going to keep myself occupied with photography and the gym and getting my drivers license. Won't be thinking about getting high.
>>28884Sober, but only because my job requires it. My outlook on life is shit like it was before I ever did drugs (although maybe a little less shit thanks to the enlightenment from LSD). How people could obtain any positive stimuli from the meaningless grind of modern life without social aptitude is beyond me. I'm sure that if life wasn't so dependent upon sobriety to keep our economic system functioning, much of the stigma of recreational drug use would be lessened.
>>293093 days has gone by quickly since I initially got on subs. Started meditating again and I feel a lot better. I haven't been in a bad mood as much as I usually am. Been waking up early and going for a nice brisk walk in the morning. It feels really good to get back on the wagon and start moving again. I've lost 5 inches off my waist in one month since I've been dieting and hitting the gym hard. I'm good. We're all gonna make it!
>>29316Well, today makes a week since I got on subs. I'm doing other things in the meantime to better myself as a person. I'm feeling so upbeat and positive. My confidence and self esteem is through the roof! I feel like I can do anything now since I truly believe in myself again. I'm happy, so fucking happy with what lies in front of me; the path I decided to walk down. So many good things are coming up soon in my life. What a great time to feel alive!
So I've abused alcohol for probably the last 5 years. The last 2 years my drinking has escalated to every day. I usually drink about 6-8 budweisers a night. The last month I've been waking up every day super anxious and extremely paranoid which I suspect was due to alcohol use. Along with that I would puke up half digested food + bile first thing in the morning.I decided to quit last week and I experienced some minor withdrawals that weren't too bad. The anxiousness and paranoia I was experiencing before hand were 90% gone for the most part and for the first time in a long time I felt great. I saved $30 from not drinking and I looked so much healthier. I was doing good until I decided to buy a six pack last night to reward myself for being sober for that long. Big mistake.I woke up today so hung over that I had to call off work, which made me feel like shit. I'm still puking everywhere and I still feel super dizzy. I'm angry at myself that I knew I would be hungover and still decided to drink and because of that I missed work for the first time in 2 years. I am done with booze.my body just cant take the abuse anymore BWS
>>29323We all relapse at least once. It's just part of the process to getting clean. Don't beat yourself up over it. Just make sure it doesn't happen again. You can do it bro. Believe in yourself and take back control of your life.
wew OP. i tracked your whole journey through the 3-4 different ID's you had autogenerated for you, and i gotta say as someone also struggling to detox, quit fucking lying to yourself bro.>lol im on suboxone and smokin weed and im sober and it feels so good>oops popped pills yesterday but tomorrow is 50 days sober!if you 'slip up' or 'relapse' then the number starts back at 0. only when you are honest and real with yourself do you have a chance.
>lol im on suboxone and smokin weed and im sober and it feels so good>oops popped pills yesterday but tomorrow is 50 days sober!
>sober>on suboxone / replacement therapypick one.
>sober>on suboxone / replacement therapy
dont kid urself O.Pif you pop a pill today aint no way ur still gonna be on day "52" or whatever number u tell urself trying to rationalise ur relapse to yourself and/or to the board. I want to encourage you and your stab at sobriety..I wish I was strong enough at the moment to check my 5bag heroin habit but thats a story for another day..point is u gotta be honest with urself. accept shame, accept defeat, and move on and learn from it.
I'm getting sober because I've lost myself. It's just weed, but it's not good for me, personally. Been smoking for nearly a decade, every day, all day-- if I wasn't working I was getting high. I used it to stop thinking so much, to get away, to self medicate. Never went to counseling, just kept ignoring my issues and my addictive personality couldn't see I was isolating myself further, reinforcing my bad habits and driving my need to smoke more. I lost two relationships because I wasn't myself and couldn't connect with people, couldn't think. I'm ashamed to be around other people when I'm high, so I just hide.Weed wasn't fun anymore, just a crutch holding me back. I have traded so much for so little. It has to stop while I still have a future and my sanity (and even that is doubtful). 6 days sober. I hope I don't replace this with something else harmful to me.
>>29349nice dude, after a week the withdrawals are pretty much gone. Do NOT start drinking alcohol or do any other drugs.I made the mistake of drinking every night after quitting weed for a 3 month period in order to find a job. I figured oh whatever it's legal and I'll just quit when I can smoke pot again. After I found the job I wanted I continued to drink + smoke every night for a 2 year period until my body was completely destroyed and I felt insane every morning. just stay sober and go for a walk anytime you experience cravings, adding another drug into the mix can easily get you into some other shit.
OP here. You all are right. I was an idiot to think I was still clean after relapsing all those times while on subs. I'm a fool to think such bullshit like I did back then. I know better now.It's been 23 days now. I'm starting to enjoy life without opiates. I got myself on a diet and am going back to the gym this Monday coming up. I'm really excited to get back to doing something I love and have a passion for. No cravings at all, not even once. I'm really looking forward to getting jacked and strong again. I finally have some purpose in my life and I can finally wake up knowing that I have something to look forward too. Everything will fall into place soon enough.
Been smoking weed and cigarettes for 10 years... tried stopping many times, then I read a book about nicotine, which changed it all.... I didnt know about ALL the bad things nicotine really does to you apart from bad health.... I still wanna smoke weed once in a while, but I am now aware that Ive spent 10 years brainwashing myself... I guess I learned that the hard part about addictions (some) is not the physical symptoms, but the mental ones you create. Nicotine really is a prison that prevents you from truly being calm.... Im just so amazes that it was the nicotine all this time, fuck that cancerous and stressing shit
I have been struggling with alcoholism for about a decade. In the last couple of months I have started to taper my usage, and for the first time in a year I am shitting solid shits.
Been sober off of my DOC for about 9 months now. Have recently been cycling through a variety of medicines(stimulants, depressants, opis, weed) and I have it all charted out to where there is no possible way I can become addicted and relapse because the half-life and everything has been carefully calculated, the only way I can run into trouble is if I stray from the chart but I have no intention to do that. Being sober feels alot better than when I was getting fucked up all the time then crashing and wasting all my money to get high and repeating it. There is still days I wake up with a real urge to abuse again but I just busy myself with random chores or something. I reward myself once a month for my sober time with a night on the town playing around at the slots with some chump change or having a few pops with some friends.
Been 49 days now. I'm getting bouts of rls . But, I can handle it. Im getting closer and closer to the end of my suboxone taper. Cant wait to be done with this. Me getting clean from opiates will make it much easier to live my life how I want to live it. I can focus on my goals and not getting high instead. Everything is going good.
Clean off Heroin and Meth for 7 months now. Just recently stopped craving meth all the time. Now I'm craving Heroin for the first time since withdrawal... I hope it passes... Its like, just when I get a break from the meth cravings, the nodded out junkie in my head wakes up and starts nagging me to go for a big nod.... One day at I time I guess...Positive note, tracks are almost completely healed, got most of my belongings back from pawn, putting life together piece by piece...
>>294267 months clean is a great accomplishment. Keep it up! Just take everything step by step, day by day. Before you know it you'll have been 1 year clean.Day 56. So fucking close just 4 more days to go and then I'm done. I can put this all behind me and go on with my life. After this is all said and done I'm going to get my life together by getting my GED and then go to college to pursue a career as a physical therapist or have a career in sports medicine. I know i can do anything that I put my mind to. Have a vision of your goals because seeing is achieving.
Been clean from opiates for well over 2 years now. Trying to quit the cigarettes now. On my second day without one, I'm getting there. Drinking lots of water is helping. Can't wait for the cravings to stop though. The withdrawal symptoms themselves are barely noticeable, it's just the cravings. I think most of it is a mental thing though.
I'm all out of drugs and it sucks ass.
I smoked a pack a day for 10 years. I've gone 72 hours without a cigarette, and I don't even miss 'em. Allen Carr's Easy Way to Quit Smoking is a fucking godsend. If you want to quit smoking, check this shit out. It's very likely to help you.PDF to the bookhttp://prdupl02.ynet.co.il/ForumFiles_2/15119301.pdfORa video explaining all the same shit basicallyhttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=11SMwQl2qHQ
I still don't have any drugs and it still sucks ass.
Day 3 of no suboxone. Getting bouts of rls which isn't a big deal considering I have rls medicine to calm my legs down. I'm going to stick this out no matter how long the rls stays in my body for. I've come so far and I'm going to keep going no matter what. It's only been a few days. But, it's good to know that you're totally clean from opiates and suboxone.
>>29434I'm currently in the process of trying to quit smoking too, i went ahead and tried the patches this time but we'll see if i can properly wean off them and stay off nicotine, however everyone is saying this book works, so i might try it out.
>>29440Try the book, or at least the video. It's real talk. It also explains why substitutes like patches or gum don't often work, so if you find that the patches aren't helping you out when you decide to not use them anymore, then check out the book. I vouch for it. I've been over a week off the cigarettes now, cravings are becoming less and less noticeable every day, breathing has gotten easier, food tastes better, etc. etc. And I still don't miss the cigarettes at all.
>>29434I've seen this book suggested a few times, and even read about half of it, but I'm trying to quit weed, not cigarettes. Does anyone know a similar book for weed?I don't smoke alone, but all of my friends smoke and its really hard not to with the social pressure. I keep quitting and failing, quitting and failing.
>>29446Put Irish spring soap under the bed sheet on the foot of your bed. I couldn't believe it either after seeing it on YouTube. It really works though for my Kratom withdrawals rls.
10 days of no suboxone. The restless leg syndrome is starting to subside. Not happening as often as it was just a few days ago. Feeling good at the moment. I've been getting cravings lately. But, I handle it well considering I haven't done opiates in months and have no desire to do so. I don't give into it like I use to.
I'm over 100 days without weed and around 50 days without taking any drug. Last drug was 2cb. Feels great, man. My mood is finally regular and i've been very fit. I overeat to get my surge of dopamine but I always feel better after an eating binge than I did after smoking. I think I'm done with weed; considering doing dxm tonight though. I never really wanted to quit drugs in general tbh. Good luck to everyone reading this.
How can you guys live like this?!Even cats, elephants and monks get high. Get off your drugs of choice sure, but adhering to complete sobriety will one day be considered a form of neurosis, it's going against animal instinct not ever getting intoxicated on something.
>>29456Honestly i was clean and sober (besides caffeine and nicotine) for 3 1/2 years and after a certain point it just becomes normal. You find other ways to escape (video games, sex, food etc.) can be just as unmanageable as drug use if you're not mentally secure and satisfied with yourself and your life. Really its your experience in life thats going to make the most difference in how you handle addiction in my opinion. i was still sober when everything came crashing down around me, and i held out for awhile before making the decision that using weed or booze or lighter drugs to help ease the pain was no worse then sitting in the pain until i completely lost my mind. But there is not doubt that getting sober to help springboard yourself into self improvement mode is a really good thing. Life is just more complicated then the sober/fucked up dynamic.
33 days sober. Had to get sober to control my borderline personality disorder and generalized anxiety disorder. Went from 9 year recluse to productive societal member of the world. An amazing change, I'm a different person. I have confidence and prefer to walk and take the city bus as I'm open to accepting society for what it is. I HAVE SELF ESTEEM. Still on pills though, but the psych ones as doctor said "they dont work unless you are clean". Sooooo I feel a bit eh about that because it's a lot of shit. Effexor, Wellbutrin, Navane, naltrexone, trazodone, and Robaxin and Tylenol and ibuprofen for chronic low-back pain. Side effects have been subsiding lately. Life is good in general which has never been words I've uttered before.
sober for like a week now. this was easy at first,but I don't have a job and I do have a couple grams of herb, so I don't know how long it can last. actually I also have a ton of booze, but that's not add tempting as my desire to smoke. I don't know,I guess having weed and booze isn't that bad a problem to have,but I know that it's going to interfere with a drug test for a job that I have coming up next month.
>>29478Keep it up, I'd say in about a month's time is when you're really gonna start feeling like a new person. It's all gonna pay off, I promise.I haven't read through all your posts, but if you haven't started exercising yet, do it. When the fog clears and you feel better, but haven't exercised, you're gonna realize you still have no energy. After I quit opiates and got over all the hard shit, I came to feeling pissbaby weak, and really had to work to get myself back to where I needed to be. Like even getting out of bed in the morning took real physical effort, and I'm not even 30 yet.Also don't start overeating when you get to feeling better. Eat more, and eat healthy for sure, because I know with opiate addictions you tend to ignore food unless you have to have it, but once you get to feeling a bit better you're gonna be eating a lot more because for one, your body needs it after being neglected, and two, it's easy to replace your addiction with food. Don't be stupid and do this, because I did and I gained like 80 pounds within a year. I managed to lose that weight and I'm healthy now, but still, just wanted to pass on advice from experience here.
>>29486Yeah I hear you. I think I'll be feeling better than I've ever been within the next month or two like you said. Everything's going okay right now. I want to go to the gym and lose weight. I'll feel a lot better mentally and physically. I also have been meditating lately which is doing only good things for me. Getting benefits already out of it. Good stuff.
I have been sober from crystal methamphetamine (smoked, shot up, snorted) for 2 weeks and 1 day. My reason for quitting is I want people to remember good things about me, I want my family to be happy, for me and theirselves. I want to make them proud and I cannot achieve that by staying on this drug. The withdrawals are mental, but i'm not the most strong-minded person and it really seems to be hard for me but with enough of this chronic I think I can stay off it. I am currently 20 years old and have had to move back in with my parents. If I stay on this shit I will also never have enough motivation to do anything with my life. What I find hardest is that it numbs the manic depression and acute anger problems I have accumulated from 3 years in a manipulative relationship as well as my own personal demons I have already. When i'm not on it, I find it to be harder and harder to keep my sanity, ironically.
>>29510Good shit dude. Keep it going! I have been reading your responses over the last few weeks.
Day 60 post suboxone taper. I took pills everyday for 2.5 weeks before getting a hold of myself a few days ago. I was just so stressed out that I stopped giving a fuck about my sobriety. But, it's not worth it. All the guilt and Shame I felt after this binge is a fucked up feeling to have. I'm not doing this to myself anymore because I'm better than that of an addict. I will get nowhere in life if i keep doing drugs. Im at the point in my life where I want to get my shit together and become happy and successful. I want to be a good member of society. Most importantly, I want to live on my own terms someday after putting in the time and effort to get through college so I can live stress free and be financially comfortable. I'm ready to gain control of my life and am ready to get the things done that are very much needed such as getting my GED and my drivers license. It's time for me to go after everything I want and need in my life. Things are starting to look up.
bunk seedsschool tomorrowstressin hard
>>29520Do you feel creative after a couple months off of subs?I know that for some people the anxiety and anhedonia can seem ever lasting but then other people bounce back after just 3 weeks and that is why most in patinet programs are only 21 or 28 days?The problem is weighing the pros and cons versus just staying on subs. But subs seems to only make a person more vulnerable and peak what they are capable of feeling naturally. Have you trying psychedelics? Do they help? How much cannabis are you using? Do massive doses help regain neuroplasticity? Do you ever feel like you cannot breath or your heart is beating too fast when you are really high on cannabis while withdrawing? A temporary oppertunity to jump off the sub wagon has presented itself with a reduction in workload temporarily. Considering committing to restoring naturall brain chemistry and quitting subs. Is it worth it? How long before a person can be creative again after sub cessation?So many other times have squandered oppertunities to quit but again feeling the need to cut my losses. Tired of being a vulnerable addict in a world that preys on us and sets up traps for addicts to fall into. So tired of brain not producing chemicals and balance on it's own. Worried that it wont be worth it and just be a waste of time. What kind of chemicals can help produce feelings of pleasure like dopamine without being an addict? Cannabis? LSD? DMT? Magnesium? Exercise?Links to any guides?
1 day off drugs. Broke a seven year streak with nutmeg of all things. I don’t even know why I did it. Random cravings for fuck it who cares, gimme 2 handfuls. Drug use seems pointless and pretentious, sobriety much of the same.
Day 4 off booze and tramadol, almost through with this vape cartridge then im gonna quit weed too. I have a good supply of herbal suppliments to help the detox process. Overall not as bad as detox ive had to go through before, but it's always better to quit while ahead
>>29526>how long before a person can be creative again after sub cessation?That's a pretty subjective question, some people aren't creative on or off drugs. I think you asked about the same thing on /opi/. It takes at least a month to start feeling normal after getting off subs in my experience. Physical WDs are over in ~10-21 days (the worst is over by 14 days usually). It can take a lot longer to get over the post withdrawal anhedonia, pessimism and lack of motivation though. Look into ULDN. Low doses of DXM (60-90mg) are pretty helpful for PAWS, but probably not something you want to be doing for too long. Exercise is definitely something you want to get into, get your body producing endorphins again.I find weed is far more anxiogenic during withdrawals, I usually stop smoking it or smoke very little for that reason. I definitely think getting off suboxone is worth it in the long term.
>how long before a person can be creative again after sub cessation?
bumping my last day sober cause i got etiz showing up tomorrow...love the few days ordering online gives you to stew in your relapse shame
>>28884Tried to quit heroin ~9 days ago, relapsed 5 days in, now 4 days without opiates. Feels like most of the physical withdrawal is over with. Ketamine helped a lot with that. Now I just have to deal with sobriety, which has never been easy for me.
I've been sober since aug 23rd of 2016. Shot dope crack and meth since 2007 as well as done everything under the sun in combination.I got sober because i had ruined everything for a decade, albeit i was ruining it before i was shooting up.Ama
Stopped with cigs and weed a few weeks ago after 10 years of smoking erryday.Brain is trying to trick me back into it, but nah bro, it's time.
soooo i quit heroin a little over 7 months ago, and honestly pretty much everything in my life is better. i mean, like... physically, mentally, fiscally. emotionally i'm still a wreck and i can't really figure out how to bridge the damage i did as an addict, but hey, at least i'm clean. i've been craving it pretty strongly, and as an alternative, i've been getting stoned and playing guitar. it's nice, but i dunno if it's really the best thing for me. i had been drinking a lot, and i work in bars, so i had to cut that, too. i am starting to think that just plain sober might be my best option.i dunno. i'm stoned and rambling and sad. what do you do to fight cravings?
>>29590cool man, what songs do you like playing on guitar? in terms of cravings I never used opiates before, so im unsure if other drug cravings are similar. But I was a very heavy alcohol user and anytime I experienced cravings for booze I would go for a walk or do something physical until that 15-20 minute frame of "i need to get fucked up right now" ends.
No drugs in the house. Ahhhhhhhhhh. Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.Considering huffing butane
>>29618Feels like I'm walking on sunshine
I'm going to be sober for the foreseeable future. Don't have any money or connects. My plan is to head to the gulf coast and try to find some work and then head to California for some weed. Hopefully there's a shortage of labor there because of the hurricane.
Coming off Subutex rn day 3. I feel like when rent got his sex drive back in transpotting except also lot of bad feels coming back that I was masking.
>quitted weed in 2014it was the year where i had the balls to drink ayahuasca. i still smoke every three months but there is no addiction anymore.my brain isnt craving to get high and this is the most wonderful gift i got from this trip. your insights convert to a new, lasting behavior. hard work, tho.now i can fuck my girlfriend for hours without cumming. thanks ayahuasca!i still do molly and psychedelics - bc why not
>quitted weed in 2014
>>29634Subutex is pure buperenorphine. Suboxone is buperenorphine with naloxone which is added to discourage abuse. They can do the exact same thing for you mentally and physically. However, If you attempt to inject a Suboxone pill or strip you could put yourself in to immediate wd and get really sick. You might of heard of narcan the brand name for injectable naloxone which is used to revive people who have overdosed. I was on suboxone for years and Subutex for 6 months and in my experience Subutex has a lot less side effects and is much easier to stop taking. Doctors where I'm originally from (the south) did not prescribe Subutex because you can inject and snort it. I told them I wouldn't do that and would prefer Subutex but they wouldnt budge. When I moved up north I found a doctor who trusted me and actually valued my opinion in my recovery. I told him i would prefer Subutex and he didnt mind at all. I snorted a few pills but mostly took them orally and eventually got down to crumbs. Now I havent had any in 8 days.
So, I've decided that after today I'm done with smoking cigs. I don't need it anymore. But, I will start vaping tomorrow and never touch another cigarette ever again. I'm just going to ween myself down on the lowest dose of juice I can and then I'm done with nicotine period.
I quit weed about 3 months ago because I wanted to save up money to go on a road trip. My life has gotten significantly worse since I stopped. Weed only makes me smarter and more able to enjoy things. It's always been like that. If I abuse it too much, the positive effects on cognition diminish and after a time it causes some problems with things like memory, but if I don't abuse it it just makes me able to think so much clearer, faster, and deeper and I miss it so much. I'm having trouble getting motivated to go on my trip now even though I was planning to leave in 3 days. The only time I can get hyped about it is when I smoke, but I don't have a connect anymore. Maybe I'll just skip the rest of the country and head straight to California now that weed is legal there because I don't think I can keep living like this.
I've stopped smoking bud and hookah.I've stopped drinking alcohol.I've stopped drinking coffee and tea.I'm doing just water. Cold, hot, or sparkling.Ever drug I consume made me feel good, but they all have a downside which I was fed up of dealing with.>Weed/hookah made me want to smoke all day, everyday and ruined my cardio>Booze hangovers are just the worst and I'm addicted to the stuff, so no mo.>Coffee and tea, while very tasty and fulfilling, actually made me lazier and too comfortable, and I couldn't hold a conversation for more than 2 minutes.I'll give an update in a month or so to record progress.
>Weed/hookah made me want to smoke all day, everyday and ruined my cardio>Booze hangovers are just the worst and I'm addicted to the stuff, so no mo.>Coffee and tea, while very tasty and fulfilling, actually made me lazier and too comfortable, and I couldn't hold a conversation for more than 2 minutes.
I stopped smoking weed. I want to go to grad school and I feel like the haziness from smoking every night isn't helping with my academics. I miss it so much but I can't be in denial any longer, I'm not as sharp as I used to be
>>29677I wish i was strong enough to quit CT everything right now but i know myself well enough to know thats not the case. Day 5 off Kratom, it was only a few weeks of mild use (3-5g a day) but still enough to give me light w/d and convince me that its not worth it. I'm preparing to attempt to quit Tobacco too, i got plenty of patches so it will only become a struggle once i ween down and get off nictotine replacement completely. I want to quit smoking weed but i know that i have to keep that going until i get to a spot where getting off the other shit won't amplify the shitty feelings, in my experience anti-depressants and mood stabilizers are necessary to keep from going back to poly-drug use, good luck to everyone trying to go the straight and narrow.
>>29683Day 8 off Kratom, the w/d from it is definitely unique, not like any other opiate w/d i've experienced. I'll literally feel completely fine one minute then the next get hit with some anxiety, sweating, extra salivation, but then it goes away again, but the fact it keeps coming back after a week makes me realize that people underestimate the addiction potential, i know for sure im over the worst of it though. Day 3 of no ciggarettes, on the patches since i have enough to last a month, once i get to that point though then the real struggle will begin for about a week, i have toothpicks and a tincture called smokers replacement for when that time comes, i'm hoping having a month to get used to not smoking in the car, on my breaks etc will make the transition easier.
>>29687kratom withdrawls sound crazy, especially after watch psychedsubstance's video on it.
>>29687Hey dude how are you doing with the kratom and cigs? Give us an update when you can.
>>29692Damn i'm surprised someone cares, let alone on this board. Its been 2 weeks today since i last used Kratom, and 9 days without cigs. The Kratom w/d has been completely gone for a week now but it worse than i thought it would be, not like anywhere near an average heroin habit w/d, but similar to hydrocodone w/d. Since there are so many alkaloids in the kratom leaf its like coming down from a bunch of different shit. I've heard similar things about the w/d from a poppy tea habit. Either way the feelings isn't really worth the risk anyways, though it is pretty damn safe in comparison to any synthetic or semi-synthic opioid but ive still met people who get themselves pretty heavily addicted to the stuff, so i think im done for good. As far as cigs go the patches are carrying me through but i don't miss them as much anymore, mint toothpicks help a ton, tobacco addiction is more complicated then people realize i think, when i let go of the weed i'll see how i do, in the meantime i've been more motivated to reel in all my bad habits, easier said than done. Thanks for letting me blogpost.
>>29693When you quit weed, get ready for some intensely vivid and downright bizarre dreams that last week's. Maybe longer, I'm only 3 weeks off it. Though insomnia will no doubt be your initial problem, the dreams can be just as bad at times. They're especially annoying when you do drugs in them then wake up utterly confused and angry at yourself for getting high before a few minutes pass and you realise it was all just a dream and you were in fact not smoking a blunt and doing fine with spiderman and your highschool crush in Kuala Lumpur.
>>29694I definitely have experienced some intense drug dreams, especially when i first got sober from heroin, coke and benzos years ago, i would actually get high in my dreams and wake up in a panic thinking i had relapsed.. Tbh weed is one of the hardest drugs for me to quit, not because the w/d is super bad or anything like that, but simply its easy to just be bored and think "why not". But i'm already getting over being stoned all the time, it makes me way too lethargic and out of it. i think once i run out of my current stash im gonna see how long i can go without smoking, it doesn't effect my life super negatively like other shit does, but it also hasn't really benefited my life as it did in the beginning. Day 15 no Kratom and Day 10 no cigs, thats a pretty good streak by my standards. Good luck to everyone else in this thread, hope things are working out.
Seeing a suboxone doctor in the next 3 weeks. Want to get clean and this time stay clean and sober and appreciate and enjoy life sober. I've gone 45 day post suboxone taper and dabbled in some opiates and then I got addicted again. This time I can get clean and stay totally clean from opiates. I don't live where I use to so I lost all my connects. Been taking a normal dose of opiates from my stash so I don't go through withdrawal. But, not enough to get high. Have to conserve my shit until I see a doctor who can prescribe me subs. Been smoking weed to curve the cravings. I know I can do this.
I used to be an alcoholic/meth/heroin addict. It's been over a decade since I stopped drinking regularly. I gave that up after the first time I went to rehab. I've been off methadone for over 6 years now. I've gotten high a few times within that span, but I haven't had any major relapses or gotten strung out again. I only really did meth when I was already loaded or drunk, so quitting that wasn't an issue. That stuff is disgusting anyways. I tried to stop using a bunch of times for legal reasons and friends and family and all that shit, but when I got clean for realsies, I had just had enough of the life and wanted to do it for myself. Living off and on the streets and getting hassled by the pigs and doing sketchy shit to score dope all got old. I tried meetings when I was forced too, but I didn't like them. Now, I just keep to myself mostly and avoid the types of people that seem like they're using. That works for me. I still smoke weed, but I'm slowly stopping that because in order to get treated for hep c, I have to have a clean piss test. Quitting weed is hard just because I know it's nowhere near as bad for me as all those other drugs I used to do, and it legitimately helps with things I used to take prescription pills for like insomnia, back pain, and depression. It's stupid that I have to stop, but it's worth it in the long run. That's another reason I don't like NA. They get all dumb about me still smoking weed while they're smoking cigarettes and pounding caffeine, 2 things I don't do. Some people in NA just have shitty attitudes and can't grasp the fact that different things work for different people. That "work the steps or die" mentality is retarded. Anyways, overall I'm more happy since I stopped the hard stuff, but sometimes I feel like I already ruined my life by wasting all those years getting loaded. Now, I'm stuck in a low paying job, and I'm too old to go to college because getting in debt at my age would just take forever and would defeat the purpose of getting an education with the goal of getting into a higher paying job. At least I'm not dead or in jail, I guess.
Smoked my last cigarette and I'm done. I'm quitting smoking as of today. It's starting to fuck with me to the point where I throw up every morning because of all the flem and mucus in my throat from smoking the previous day. I can't keep doing this to myself anymore. I want to get my lungs healthy again and feel healthy again. That's it. I'm done.Im meditating again and been going to the gym for about 2 months. I'm doing everything in my power to change myself and my life. Big or small steps... either way these steps will get me closer to happiness and success until I'm where I want to be. It's time that I become independent and become able to stand on my own two feet in every way I can.
day 4 of no more ganja, had to quit that shit
I'm pretty sure that my dopamine and serotonin levels are low, either that or the receptors have too high of a threshold. The "highs" I feel don't even feel good, it's more just like an annoying feeling in my head and it causes panic attacks. I'm pretty sure I'm fucked up for life even though my stint with drugs was brief but intense. I've still had to retreat to the bottle and benzos on occasion to handle the panic attacks. I can't tell if I have HPPD or am legitimately losing my mind. My heart doesn't seem to regulate correctly and I'm sure my life is shortening because of it. I can't life like this.I just want to go back to normal. And not the normal I was before, that was lethargic and couldn't get out of bed, but a real normal. Just something that can at least survive without thinking of killing itself every day.
I've decided to quit smoking weed. My lungs and throat are fucked up from it from the abuse of chronic smoking and to be honest it's eating a hole through my wallet. Also, it doesn't help me mentally at all like it used to. It's just a huge waste of money. I've used weed as a crutch for my problems for a long time now. It's time for me to go see a therapist for my demons and issues and be able to love life being sober and not needing drugs to get through my day. I want my mind to go back to normal like it was before making a huge and bad habit of smoking and using that to cope, which wasn't the right thing to do period.I'm ready to hit life hard and kick ass each and every day. I'm ready to become the strongest version of myself, mentally, physically and spiritually. I'm ready to become sober.
Day 6, going on day 7 of no opiates after a 6 month H/PST/fentalogues/oxy habit. My last fuckups were with oxy so thank god that means this shits almost over. I haven't been sober exactly, but this is the longest period of time in 6 months I've been off the /opi/. Gabapentin has made this MUCH easier and is a fucking miracle drug for opiate detox. Gabas >>> benzos. I don't plan on being sober, but I'm hoping I never have to be thrust into an addiction as bad as this one was again. It's a nice feeling to know the money in your wallet isn't just waiting to be spent on dope.
welp. today is day 365 with no weed. not sure how to feel about that. smoked all day errday for the preceding 6 years. got to the point where I just needed to stop, and I might be getting a better job soon. Is it bad that I kinda don't want to get a good paying, stable job that does random drug tests so I can go back to smoking? I don't knowI definitely miss it
3 days have passed since I quit smoking weed. Already my mind feels so clear than it has in a long time. The cravings are just about non existent. So glad I got away from this shit. This is much easier than I thought it would be. Weed has been a crutch for me which I don't need anymore. I'm much better off without it.
>>28884Sober off alcohol just a little bit over a month. Miss it so much. BWS.
How do you deal with HPPD if it's affecting you cognitively too? My psychiatrist diagnosed me with major depressive disorder and I'm taking SSRIs and trazadone now but I feel like my whole body is out of whack and my cognitive ability is all kinds of fucked up. I did everything, from DXM to DPH to LSD to coke but now I feel like I'm just permanently fucked up and there's nothing I can do to heal.
Hopping on suboxone starting Sunday. I'm so glad I finally have the chance to get clean and this time I'm not relapsing.With that said... I don't care or give two fucks about my mother needing meds off the street because she's a addict. She better not come to me asking me for dope money or come to me and starts crying about how pain management took most of her meds and cant function even though they switched her meds. Her pill problem will no longer be my problem anymore. I'm done with this bitch and in 2 months I finally will go my separate ways from her and my brother when I move out. Good riddance whore.
Day 1 of no weed, i know its a pretty weak addiction to have but after getting away from hard drugs for years and limiting my alcohol intake to a moderate amount my weed usage has skyrocketed. I use it as a crutch to an extreme and quitting has been way harder for me now then it was in the past. Im sick of the paranoia, spacy-ness and general laziness from smoking all day erry day, i just have to resist the temptation of going to the dispensary up the street when things get stressful and/or boring. probably will still drink at least initially since i seem to be super sensitive to cannabis withdrawal.
Sober from alcohol for 15 days, it's probably the longest I went without alcohol in 5 years or so. The biggest thing I notice is the free time and progress that I'm making on things that I want to. I might have not been drinking everyday, but getting fucked up every few days and spending the rest thinking about alcohol and planning when I'll be able to drink again was unproductive and frankly boring. Also just when I quit alcohol I used GHB (BDO) a couple of times and I've since used Phenibut weekly. I've no idea if it has any relation, but I haven't had any cravings (knock on wood), which I'd usually start having after a week sober at the latest. In any case, I've already loved this period of my life so whatever comes, comes
Lost my license because I rode my bike drunk with a BAC of 0.233 a few years agoThey told me I have to get regular liver screenings for a period of 6-12 months to show that I'm capable of "controlled drinking", which I did. Barely drank for 9 months and got a check-up every 4 weeks, all the results were fine. Now the equivalent of the DMV in my country tell me that this is not enough, since my BAC at the time of my incident was so high. To proof that I've changed my drinking habits I now have to proof another 3 months of total abstinence and on top of that another 6 months of liver screenings to proof I'm capable of "controlled drinking".Just wanted to vent, I really hoped I could finally get my license back after 9 months, this shit is fucking retarded and costing me a fortune. The fact that I never drove a car drunk in my entire life and would never do it just frustrates me even more, fucking hell I just rode my bike down a barely used bicycle track for 1km at 2am, far away from the main road so no cars I could endanger and this shit is ruining my lifeAnd even if I pass all the medical exams I still have to pass the conversation with the psychologist, "How much did you drink that night exactly, How much did you drink before that, how did your drinking start, why did you drink, what strategies did you come up with so this won't happen in the future, are there risk factors in your life that will make you start drinking again, hows the situation with your family, do you have a stable relationship, do you have a path in life, where do you see yourself in 5 years". I barely drink anymore and the only reason I want to start again is because of this shit
>>29855Never got any subs. I've decided to go cold Turkey starting today. I only took 10mg methadone daily so I wouldn't go through withdrawal. So, I wont be THAT miserable since I took such a minuscule dose. It'll take 2-3 weeks to get over withdrawal. But, I'm willing to do whatever it takes to get clean and sober. I'm sick of being an addict and taking everyone broke. I'm sick of having to depend on drugs to get through my day. No more. I'm done. Today is day 1. All the hardship that I'm about to go through in terms of withdrawal will be worth it in the end.
>>29859What insane nanny state do you live in?
>>29859>"How much did you drink that night exactly, How much did you drink before that, how did your drinking start, why did you drink, what strategies did you come up with so this won't happen in the future, are there risk factors in your life that will make you start drinking again, hows the situation with your family, do you have a stable relationship, do you have a path in life, where do you see yourself in 5 years". Jesus fucking christ, they believe this shit is helping people? Prying forcefully into their personal lives as if they had the right and moral authority?
>"How much did you drink that night exactly, How much did you drink before that, how did your drinking start, why did you drink, what strategies did you come up with so this won't happen in the future, are there risk factors in your life that will make you start drinking again, hows the situation with your family, do you have a stable relationship, do you have a path in life, where do you see yourself in 5 years".
>>29861>>29862I live in GermanyComplaining isn't an option because "Rules are rules" and "If you didn't want to go through this bureaucratic nightmare you shouldn't have rode your bike drunk LOL"They want to be a 100% sure that I won't drive a motorized vehicle under the influence of alcohol anytime in the future, so I have to prove that-I changed my drinking habits (prove abstinence and/or ability for "controlled drinking" for a period of 6-12 months)-My life is in order (job, mental health, family, relationship), so there are no risk factors for me to start drinking heavily again-I have a plan for how to handle critical life situations without using alcohol (like sports or other productive substitute activities, but don't call them a substitute for alcohol, because that means I'm still addicted)Also had to go to meetings on how this reevalution test is going to work and see a psychologist to prepare me for the test, which is costing me a fortune ("I'd recommend to also go to this other preparation meeting for these tests, group sessions cost only 600€"), the test is another 400€ for each try, +350€ for driving my bike drunk +140€ for the psychology preparation session 2x200€ for the abstinence checksBitch I just rode a bike, I only endangered myself and never even thought about driving a car drunk you fucking insane kafka-bureaucrats
>>29865Huh, I thought Germans loved their beer? Fact is, I live just across the border and I'm 99% sure that I rode a bike in Germany after having some wine. Hell, there are loads of older people cycling and then hitting up the schnitzel and beer. Granted it's not a BAC of 0.233 but stillAlso the money for courses is obviously just a way to pocket some money for the psychologists
>>29865I'm a very left leaning person with social libertarian beliefs but thats extreme and a pointless waste of tax dollars.
>>29866The legal limit for riding a bike is 0.159 BAC or 1,59 Promille which is the unit we use. If you get caught with a higher BAC you have to do the MPU (Medical-Psychological-Examination) which is the only way I can get my license back. There seems to be a huge industry surrounding the MPU including special practices just for Verkehrspsychologen (traffic/driving psychologists) where at least one session de facto mandatory.The preparation courses are also de facto mandatory, if you didn't visit any preparation courses it's interpreted as an unwillingness to confront my drinking habits and that I'm not taking my punishment seriously enough for the heinous crime I did. In the eyes of the MPU examiners everyone who has to take the test is an alcoholic/has severe problems with alcohol and it's my duty to proof to them without ANY doubt that I will be completely abstinent in the future OR be a responsible/controlled drinker (which basically means I have to note of and plan every occasion where I will drink alcohol, not more than 12 times a year and never over 0.07BAC or 0,7 Promille)I've been researching this stuff for a few days now, and there's a huge market for preparation courses and SEVERAL internet forums just dedicated for users to prepare for the MPU and this shit is getting more complicated the more I learn about it. "You mustn't see the MPU as a hassle, you must see it as a CHANCE!"-My psychologist who charges 4€ a minute and talks really slowly and repeats the same information several times with different wordsSorry that I'm venting so much in this sobriety thread, I really don't want to talk about this with my friends, no one knows that I lost my license
Just out of my second rehab and now on daily naltrexone to avoid a relapse with H.That's one thing, but yesterday I started injecting Coke worth 90 Bucks. The only thing that let me stop this madness was buying Hash instead of fresh needles in front of the needle exchange. Smoked it all at home crying looking back at last year and looking at my scarred arms. Fuck this strange obsession with sticking needles into my arms.Well today I'm kinda fine, cleaned my apartment, drank some tea and took a bath.Dunno if I can mantain a life in abstinence but hell am I tired of the life of a junkie.
Im sober rntook about a few codeine yesterday and smoke a bit of hash but thats nothing really.I just received some St Johns Wort and 5htp. I dont know if they can fix a broken heart but here's trying anyway.
Drank bottle of whisky with a cigarette last night, but now Im clean until monday. I'm telling you my cigarette smoking days are over starting today, and I will drink much less from now on.
just got out of a 6 and 1/2 day detox. the hospital i went to does detox in the psych ward. it was alright except for one dude who not only didn't want to be there, but was completely oblivious of his surroundings and very vocally complaining about everything, cussing out the nurses, etc. everyone else was pretty chill for the most part. (one schizo guy's thorazine wore off and he started yelling about everyone needing to turn to jesus but he was really cool when he was baseline.)anyway, yeah, 6.5 days sober. been meditating a lot. i actually had the money and wherewithal to buy mother's day gifts today. now i'm chilling in a cafe. it's pretty dope.
>>29884oh yeah, also got that fancy naltrexone shot, which is supposed to make me not want booze for a month. i guess it works because i haven't had any cravings yet. or maybe it was all the meditation and group therapy. who knows. we'll see in a month!
>>29885update:i now feel like life is a daydream. my speechy parts of my brain are a bit floaty. i do not know if this is from the naltrexone or the continuation of the not being drunk all the time. the shakes are completely gone though.
I'm seeing a suboxone doctor in a week. Need subs to get clean. Im 28 and I need to get my life on track. I'm not getting any younger. I don't want to keep being addicted to drugs anymore. But, for months I've been taking 10mg methadone a day. Just enough to keep me from going through withdrawal. Now, I want to be clean and move on with my life.
>>29786The steps are total fucking voodoo jumbo jumbo.It's just to guilt trap you in their cult. Yesterday doesn't matter, but we will talk about it everyday for the rest of your life. That makes sense.
>>29895No more having to go see a suboxone doctor. Someone I know had some subs they still had and sold them to me. So, I'm starting my sub taper tomorrow. I'm lucky this happened
>>29900Started my suboxone taper today. 2 months is all I need to get clean and time will pass by fairly quick. Disgunbgud
34 days off painkillers. Started working out again, pretty happy since my lifts are only a little below where they were 6 months ago. The anxiety hasn't been as bad as I thought it would be, but the boredom gets to me more than I thought it would. Doing things sober just reminds me of how great they were high and I lose interest in about thirty minutes. Been drinking still, but no more than I did when I had painkillers. At least I feel better emotionally, not doing shitty things to get high. Good luck bros.
Day 4 of being on suboxone and it's going good. I'll be done with my taper on the 20th of July. Everything is going to be ok.Also, I have an e-cig coming in the mail today. Will be getting juice and some batteries for it. I'm quitting cigarettes and I'm going to start vaping. I wake up and throw up immediately in the mornings because of cigarettes. Happens every day now and its scaring me. Plus, vomiting and dry heaving is no fun. Don't want to get cancer later on in life either and die like some of my family members have.
>>29906stay strong my dude
>>29907Thanks homie. Dieting, suboxone tapering and quitting cigs all at once is starting to freak me out a little bit. But, I can handle all of this because I know I can. I just have to stay positive.
Today makes 1 week since getting on suboxone. My mind is so clear for the first time in a long time. Can't wait to see how much better I feel in the next month. I'm focusing on more in my life right now than just getting clean. I'm making a life change for myself for many reasons. Everything is going good.
I should probably post here and stay away from /opi/ considering, at least for now.Had to wait 2 months for my appt but I finally got my sub script on Friday and am elated. She gave me 24mg a day to start with which isn't bad. I got Subutex too because it's cheaper if you're paying out of insurance so that was nice of her. Got another appt Tuesday in case she needs to up my dose but I've been keeping it about 12 a day honestly.Feeling great though, last two months I was broke so I was in and out of WD every week just feels really nice to not be in WD for once. Hopefully I can source some MR-2096 in the near future but now that I basically got an unlimited supply of subs I'm in no rush to score for once in my life.Happy subbing guys
It's been 10 days since I started my suboxone taper. I had little bouts of RLS for a few days. But, I'm over it and my body is getting used to having no opiates in my system, besides the subs of course. But, I'm doing great.Along with doing this taper, I've been seeing a therapist for the past 3 weeks and I've made so much progress in such little time. I'm meditating twice a day and I've been on a diet for a while now that has caused me to lose 70lbs so far. I'm trying to stop smoking cigs and vape instead. But, it's pretty hard. I've been smoking 4-5 cigs a day and the rest of the time I vape. But, I would smoke 2 packs a day. This is a great improvement. But, I'm weaning myself down until I vape completely and not touch a cigarette again.Overall, I'm feeling better than ever and I'm finally beginning to realize so many things about myself that I thought I could never be and things that i can do with my life that I thought I could never do before. This taper is more than just getting clean. This is the start of a life change for me and I'm not going to give up on myself so easily like I did last time. Its for real this time.
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