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Bottle Opener by Stephen Underhill - Wed, 09 Aug 2017 22:38:48 EST ID:xKLxSawl No.275220 Ignore Report Quick Reply
File: 1502332728120.jpg -(36674B / 35.81KB, 636x358) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size. 36674
I just used the claw side of a hammer to open a bottle. What's the crudest tool you've ever had to use in order to open a bottle?
Phineas Cladgesin - Wed, 09 Aug 2017 23:13:31 EST ID:Qh/x7OSJ No.275222 Ignore Report Quick Reply
for pry offs if you do it correctly you can open a bottle of beer with another bottle of beer so that you have 2 open bottles.

beyond that the crudest would be nail clipppers
Rebecca Cleblingcocke - Thu, 10 Aug 2017 04:06:40 EST ID:ydJmX8xf No.275227 Ignore Report Quick Reply
The edge of a table and my hand
Hannah Dusslefield - Thu, 10 Aug 2017 07:19:41 EST ID:xDJ++mYR No.275228 Ignore Report Quick Reply
> for pry offs if you do it correctly you can open a bottle of beer with another bottle of beer so that you have 2 open bottles.
Huh? You only get one open bottle if you do this right?
Crudest tool was definitely a knife.
John Blubberkot - Thu, 10 Aug 2017 07:37:30 EST ID:cSp6H+dr No.275229 Ignore Report Quick Reply
A rectangular metal pole that was cut off at the top or the end of the rope for pulling another car
Phyllis Greenwell - Thu, 10 Aug 2017 09:01:27 EST ID:XpSQmDVn No.275230 Ignore Report Quick Reply
What are these retards doing? You're supposed to use your molars
Phineas Cladgesin - Thu, 10 Aug 2017 14:42:05 EST ID:Qh/x7OSJ No.275231 Ignore Report Quick Reply

Right so this video shows it to where you only get one open bottle. However if you pry the bottle you're trying to open the way the video shows but once it's slightly open use it's cap to pry open the bottle you used for leverage you can end up with 2 open bottles. Just takes a little practice.

You can also use this same method shown in the video with the end of a lighter to pry caps off
John Blytheman - Thu, 10 Aug 2017 16:58:50 EST ID:9IgV0JKx No.275232 Ignore Report Quick Reply
my friend's anus
Gnarly McGoblin - Thu, 10 Aug 2017 17:07:35 EST ID:LKraj6R1 No.275233 Ignore Report Quick Reply
A DIN A4 piece of paper.
If folded correctly you'll get an almost stable handle with a relatively sharp edge.
Walter Dropperwill - Thu, 10 Aug 2017 21:19:17 EST ID:QJ2Jjm/S No.275237 Ignore Report Quick Reply
one time i was in a hotel without a bottle opener so we just smacked the edge of the lid against a metal dresser handle. scratched it up a bit but otherwise worked like a charm
John Femmerwater - Fri, 11 Aug 2017 22:18:57 EST ID:6CB99bga No.275255 Ignore Report Quick Reply
This 60-something year-old guy who lived a few doors down from me could slam a beer bottle against a hard surface at such an angle as to break the top part of the neck off, but not any more, so that he'd be left with a sharp rim to drink from.
I'm sure he ended up with broken glass in his stomach, but goddamn, it was cool to see him do it.
Thomas Drusslepitch - Sat, 12 Aug 2017 13:43:34 EST ID:k6yZAmzl No.275266 Ignore Report Quick Reply
If you're the kinda person who always has a lighter then you always have a bottle opener.
People who use their teeth fuck me up, anyone have any dental damage experience related to this or am I bein a wimp?
Nathaniel Cuvingsuck - Sat, 12 Aug 2017 18:50:15 EST ID:QJ2Jjm/S No.275268 Ignore Report Quick Reply

there is no doubt in my mind people have chipped their teeth from this, though i havent witnessed it myself, makes me internally cringe like a motherfucker when i see it
Jarvis Dibblesedge - Sat, 12 Aug 2017 19:59:13 EST ID:rIAw48vy No.275269 Ignore Report Quick Reply
One time I was at a barbecue that was BYOB and we brought our beers but forgot to bring a bottle opener and then this guy opened like 8 in a row with the wedding ring on his finger.
Ebenezer Gommersotch - Mon, 14 Aug 2017 19:38:45 EST ID:9aZZ5J5q No.275285 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Edges of bricks and tables n stuff, one time a friend of mine actually took a sizeable chunk out of a curb doing this lol. But the crudest way ive opened a bottle of wine is with a huge wood screw and a pair of pliers.
Fanny Niggleked - Wed, 16 Aug 2017 18:07:38 EST ID:k6yZAmzl No.275292 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Anyone ever open corked wine by putting the bottle in a shoe and whacking it against a wall?
Nice alternative to smashing and just incredibly funny to witness when you're fucked up.
Nigel Sunningwell - Wed, 16 Aug 2017 23:14:01 EST ID:QJ2Jjm/S No.275296 Ignore Report Quick Reply

haha what the fuck? im having trouble picturing this, can you describe it a little more please?
Lydia Pittingstack - Thu, 17 Aug 2017 06:35:06 EST ID:wLCeqsvp No.275303 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Nigel Sunningwell - Thu, 17 Aug 2017 14:06:04 EST ID:QJ2Jjm/S No.275310 Ignore Report Quick Reply

wow i have never heard of this method before and its ghetto as fuck but it certainly seems to work
Martin Blackworth - Thu, 17 Aug 2017 18:42:13 EST ID:ydJmX8xf No.275313 Ignore Report Quick Reply
that's really cool
I'm gonna bust that out at a party sometime
Shit Medgedock - Thu, 17 Aug 2017 19:16:40 EST ID:2gxTVo8k No.275314 Ignore Report Quick Reply
I feel like I would like to but none of the parties I'm at have those kinds of heels. Nor are there many bottles of wine. And the ones that ARE there are most likely capped.
Phoebe Bligglesudging - Sat, 19 Aug 2017 00:38:08 EST ID:MQDLb6Zz No.275340 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Years ago I was preparing for a night out I had 2 liter bottle of red wine, but me being a dumbass didn't realize it was was corked and not capped when I bought it. So I spent a good 20 minutes in a drunken stupor digging away at the cork with a pocket knife.
Ebenezer Sondlekun - Sat, 19 Aug 2017 03:03:06 EST ID:qJOyCJpH No.275344 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Opened a beer with my skateboard the other day
Barnaby Fondlepen - Thu, 24 Aug 2017 00:15:09 EST ID:GDpDLvcZ No.275391 Ignore Report Quick Reply
1503548109465.jpg -(10033B / 9.80KB, 250x250) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size.
>Niggas dont even saber your beer
Johnny Coppafeild - Thu, 24 Aug 2017 04:54:04 EST ID:ZBagwb2Z No.275399 Ignore Report Quick Reply
1503564844018.jpg -(312689B / 305.36KB, 1280x960) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size.
One time I untwisted a cap off a corona extra.
Matilda Blumblesutch - Sun, 27 Aug 2017 00:45:25 EST ID:LJb3WDBO No.275430 Ignore Report Quick Reply
shopping cart
Cornelius Worthingdock - Sun, 27 Aug 2017 09:41:26 EST ID:eKXmBRm0 No.275433 Ignore Report Quick Reply
As a kid I sometimes used my teeth. Also I'm not fucking shitting you, the fat kid in high school actually opened a bottle with his stomach. Anyway, I just used a lighter, but who hasn't opened a bottle like that. Spoons are also common - they're better than knives because of the good grip on the head.
Hugh Blabbleford - Sun, 27 Aug 2017 11:36:29 EST ID:iC7TyiE9 No.275434 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Reminds me of when I was trying to figure out how to open a bottle of beer in this parking lot and then my friend was like "i got you bro" and then proceeded to bash the head of the bottle on the concrete curb. Of course it instantly shattered and all my beer went down the sewer gate. I then asked him what the fuck he thought was going to happen and he was like, "I dunno I thought it would just pop off". Dumbass.
Alice Menderfoot - Tue, 29 Aug 2017 16:48:26 EST ID:rTJmGfiv No.275461 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>Be Christmas in 2013/14
>Be sad 15yo who didnt get any presents and had to deal with yelling children and parents for a whole week
>Say fuck this shit and hike 2 miles into the woods near my house in 1.5 feet of snow
>go to local hangout smoke spot with my bowl and some ganj
>see a bottle in the snow
>Its totally full and unopened fuck yeah!
>big ass smirnof Ice 5% but hey its a xmas miracle
>spend a half hour trying to pop the damn thing open
>use a screwdriver i use as a pockey tool and a brick to hammer the screwdriver into the cap
>use leverage to fuck up the cap and finally pop it open
>cut myself abit
>drink it, smoke a few bowls, look at the bottle and realize it was a twist off
>KEK hard and go home feeling slighty better cause no tollerance to alcohol

>MFW my only present was probably from a drunk hobo that forgot his bottle in the snow

Nell Fonnerhood - Wed, 30 Aug 2017 13:36:32 EST ID:8SEAjeQ5 No.275469 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Always a lighter.
George Pockwell - Wed, 30 Aug 2017 19:50:56 EST ID:sw512Eec No.275476 Ignore Report Quick Reply
If there was a homeless guy who chose to spend his few precious coins on fucking Smirnoff Ice then we're better off without him in the gene pool
Polly Wummerlat - Fri, 01 Sep 2017 07:16:38 EST ID:b4WOhddj No.275493 Ignore Report Quick Reply
I usually use a lighter.
David Hinnerstone - Sun, 03 Sep 2017 00:32:07 EST ID:rEMxTAuu No.275515 Ignore Report Quick Reply
I generally use a lighter. It's kinda a party trick, but as someone who smokes and drinks, I found it pretty damn useful.
Shit Mottingdon - Thu, 07 Sep 2017 10:56:15 EST ID:xEb5i1/g No.275565 Ignore Report Quick Reply
my bare hands
it left a hell of a bruise and tore a cut in one of my thumbs
but it was one of my proudest moments
Hamilton Chenningwure - Mon, 11 Sep 2017 09:33:56 EST ID:VVJPDrPa No.275624 Ignore Report Quick Reply
I can't remember the single crudest one but some common ones I do return to are
Table edge
Other end of fork or spoon
Snus case

A crude tool I'll never use: my teeth
Hamilton Chenningwure - Mon, 11 Sep 2017 09:36:14 EST ID:VVJPDrPa No.275625 Ignore Report Quick Reply

Forgot lighter, I use that too.
Jack Hagglegold - Thu, 14 Sep 2017 00:07:50 EST ID:51ubZhu/ No.275648 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Once you learn the technique for using a lighter you can apply it to basically any object.
Augustus Drabberchork - Sun, 29 Oct 2017 10:47:32 EST ID:gWDEu4zd No.276203 Ignore Report Quick Reply
I have chipped 2 teeth in my teens from opening beer bottles with my teeth.
not to mention my own mother is a dentist and she had seen them was pretty bad to explain at 16.
Sidney Pockcocke - Sun, 29 Oct 2017 17:07:51 EST ID:VVJPDrPa No.276212 Ignore Report Quick Reply

I'm >>275624
My friend does it without a second thought but he also looks like someone who can handle it. He looks like a gorilla. I'll never use it as long as edges tables, chairs, stairs are available and something always is, not to mention a lighter that makes it easy peasy or a snus box.
Snot Havisham - Sun, 29 Oct 2017 20:47:59 EST ID:cliyRR7L No.276216 Ignore Report Quick Reply
A pair of pliers for a shot bottle that was sealed too tightly for a hand to twist off!
Jack Binningfoot - Fri, 03 Nov 2017 17:20:50 EST ID:mmW8GAoR No.276312 Ignore Report Quick Reply
another beer
David Granddale - Tue, 07 Nov 2017 21:07:47 EST ID:xnU87HAn No.276365 Ignore Report Quick Reply
1510106867153.jpg -(175213B / 171.11KB, 1004x1500) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size.
shit dude ive used tons of shit but CRUDEST has to be teeth.
Ernest Bricklekig - Tue, 07 Nov 2017 22:21:26 EST ID:dzdf5Vlt No.276368 Ignore Report Quick Reply
I used to open bottles with my teeth all the time when I was a teen thinking it looked cool, obviously everyone just thought I was an idiot but it always got a reaction. chipped parts of my teeth off both sides my mouth they're kinda fucked now.
Matilda Chigglehad - Wed, 08 Nov 2017 03:09:41 EST ID:4SI8rXug No.276377 Ignore Report Quick Reply
I've opened a wine bottle with a shoe before
Isabella Snodwill - Wed, 08 Nov 2017 09:37:39 EST ID:Phm/2JmS No.276381 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Yeah it's very retarded to permanently damage your teeth for something so unnecessary. We were all teens once though.
Fucking Tillinghood - Wed, 08 Nov 2017 16:35:24 EST ID:416iXYuG No.276389 Ignore Report Quick Reply
My teeth are already shit, so I've never tried.

Using my phone usually gets a reaction. An empty or full can of beer also gets a good reaction for some reason.
Betsy Horryhood - Wed, 08 Nov 2017 21:17:27 EST ID:6RGdH7zF No.276390 Ignore Report Quick Reply
my teeth
Betsy Horryhood - Wed, 08 Nov 2017 21:18:15 EST ID:6RGdH7zF No.276391 Ignore Report Quick Reply
my teeth
Clara Cugglefield - Wed, 15 Nov 2017 15:11:06 EST ID:oYCadkgD No.276502 Ignore Report Quick Reply
My teeth. Unlike the pussies in the OP.
Esther Bardstone - Wed, 15 Nov 2017 15:24:12 EST ID:YW7pGJQ6 No.276503 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Probably a newspaper. Others include a shovel, a bike helmet, an axe and a chainsaw. Mostly use my lighter like everyone else around here but it's fun to improvise once in a while.
Lillian Clayfuck - Wed, 15 Nov 2017 15:34:31 EST ID:rkrzN22U No.276504 Ignore Report Quick Reply
This isn't crude, but my ski boot as a latch that's made to also function as a bottle opener. I've used it a few dozen times on ski mountains.
Hedda Brockleville - Fri, 17 Nov 2017 09:03:36 EST ID:2YaDN6Bj No.276540 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Occasional table. Put the rim of the crown top on the edge of the table and give it a good whack with your fist. The tables have dents in them from this.
Phyllis Geckleteck - Fri, 17 Nov 2017 12:28:26 EST ID:7mFWVyov No.276543 Ignore Report Quick Reply
This. I have a desk in my room where the edges on one side of it are all torn up from doing this. I would just crack them open with my teeth but they're pretty sensetive and I'm honestly worried I'd damage them if I do this shit.
Shitting Mizzleson - Wed, 29 Nov 2017 05:22:37 EST ID:qIM8HNqw No.276686 Ignore Report Quick Reply
1511950957462.jpg -(49471B / 48.31KB, 576x494) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size.
Impresses the chicks everytime
Dextrolord - Thu, 30 Nov 2017 02:09:01 EST ID:DaACn/xk No.276694 Ignore Report Quick Reply
I just used a shopping cart on my way home
John Wunnerdock - Thu, 30 Nov 2017 04:40:35 EST ID:dTgEtY40 No.276695 Ignore Report Quick Reply
I was watching the “LA beast” on YouTube and that glorious fucker was opening bottles by flicking a cd disk at the cap which seems like it wouldn’t work. I tried it after and it works suprisingly well.
Samuel Memmerworth - Thu, 30 Nov 2017 08:45:21 EST ID:Z4RAr2Ky No.276696 Ignore Report Quick Reply
My list is as follows
>my teeth
>womans belt buckle
>hard coasters (have girl hold, and throw hard like frisbee, can at leasg pop half top
>anything solid like tables, lighters, bottles. You can roll up a dollar bill and use that.

Other teens practiced zippo tricks, I practiced opening beers.
Hugh Hovingstone - Thu, 30 Nov 2017 13:00:39 EST ID:Ks09+eK0 No.276697 Ignore Report Quick Reply

A compact disc disk? You don't say?
Rebecca Gushnud - Fri, 01 Dec 2017 00:42:24 EST ID:whxSa7Jp No.276707 Ignore Report Quick Reply
I see a lot of replies about people doing it with their teeth...I had a friend who did it with his bare teeth all the time and I thought it was dumb as fuck, and for two years he did it when there was no bottle opener w/ no problem. Then, he slightly chipped a molar but barely at all and since then he's just put his shirt or a towel or something around the cap and hasn't had a problem injuring his teeth since.

I have never been able to open a bottle purely with my teeth but since I saw him do it with a shirt or towel. I've been able to open a top enough w/ my teeth combined with something covering the top to easily remove it with my hand afterwards. Honestly, that seems like the safest method among those that people worry about teeth damage or broken glass. The stuff about the lighter I've seen before and other shit. But in a pinch and shirt around a top and some teeth will work.
Jack Blomblewater - Mon, 04 Dec 2017 17:13:27 EST ID:utM2rzAr No.276744 Ignore Report Quick Reply
once you learn how to do the lighter trick you can open a bottle with whatever, ive used keys, knives, forks, spoons, table edges, lamp posts, anything
Emma Suttingworth - Tue, 05 Dec 2017 04:34:14 EST ID:HL1Z0uAQ No.276752 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Fucking weak fucks. Dent the center of the cap with a knuckle and push it off with your thumb. It works if you don't have boy hands.
Sidney Maggleshaw - Tue, 05 Dec 2017 20:48:46 EST ID:tn58jTEg No.276765 Ignore Report Quick Reply

I can't believe this shitty thread has 55 replies... fucking board is dead.
Betsy Mumbleway - Tue, 26 Dec 2017 21:50:38 EST ID:DxQcq3zy No.276987 Ignore Report Quick Reply
I opened a bottle using my teeth when trashed and broke my tooth. It fucking sucked the next day.
Betsy Nicklegold - Wed, 27 Dec 2017 07:31:55 EST ID:KuSeeESR No.276990 Ignore Report Quick Reply
have chipped two teeth from this and am only 18. my family is also dentists...
Sidney Purrywell - Thu, 28 Dec 2017 19:31:28 EST ID:wFLd8yTh No.277001 Ignore Report Quick Reply
lol this is the only way I open bottles at home
Wesley Pattinglock - Fri, 29 Dec 2017 08:21:43 EST ID:JBQtRrj9 No.277005 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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UK plugs can open bottles
Wesley Pattinglock - Fri, 29 Dec 2017 08:25:57 EST ID:JBQtRrj9 No.277006 Ignore Report Quick Reply
1514553957292.webm [mp4] -(2627357B / 2.51MB, 720x720) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size.

As can the lower part of the ceiling on most UK trains.

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