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Bottle Opener by Stephen Underhill - Wed, 09 Aug 2017 22:38:48 EST ID:xKLxSawl No.275220 Ignore Report Quick Reply
File: 1502332728120.jpg -(36674B / 35.81KB, 636x358) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size. 36674
I just used the claw side of a hammer to open a bottle. What's the crudest tool you've ever had to use in order to open a bottle?
>>
Phineas Cladgesin - Wed, 09 Aug 2017 23:13:31 EST ID:Qh/x7OSJ No.275222 Ignore Report Quick Reply
for pry offs if you do it correctly you can open a bottle of beer with another bottle of beer so that you have 2 open bottles.

beyond that the crudest would be nail clipppers
>>
Rebecca Cleblingcocke - Thu, 10 Aug 2017 04:06:40 EST ID:ydJmX8xf No.275227 Ignore Report Quick Reply
The edge of a table and my hand
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Hannah Dusslefield - Thu, 10 Aug 2017 07:19:41 EST ID:xDJ++mYR No.275228 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>275222
> for pry offs if you do it correctly you can open a bottle of beer with another bottle of beer so that you have 2 open bottles.
Huh? You only get one open bottle if you do this right?
Crudest tool was definitely a knife.
>>
John Blubberkot - Thu, 10 Aug 2017 07:37:30 EST ID:cSp6H+dr No.275229 Ignore Report Quick Reply
A rectangular metal pole that was cut off at the top or the end of the rope for pulling another car
>>
Phyllis Greenwell - Thu, 10 Aug 2017 09:01:27 EST ID:XpSQmDVn No.275230 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>275220
What are these retards doing? You're supposed to use your molars
>>
Phineas Cladgesin - Thu, 10 Aug 2017 14:42:05 EST ID:Qh/x7OSJ No.275231 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>275228
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nrKTKQVsib4

Right so this video shows it to where you only get one open bottle. However if you pry the bottle you're trying to open the way the video shows but once it's slightly open use it's cap to pry open the bottle you used for leverage you can end up with 2 open bottles. Just takes a little practice.

You can also use this same method shown in the video with the end of a lighter to pry caps off
>>
John Blytheman - Thu, 10 Aug 2017 16:58:50 EST ID:9IgV0JKx No.275232 Ignore Report Quick Reply
my friend's anus
>>
Gnarly McGoblin - Thu, 10 Aug 2017 17:07:35 EST ID:LKraj6R1 No.275233 Ignore Report Quick Reply
A DIN A4 piece of paper.
If folded correctly you'll get an almost stable handle with a relatively sharp edge.
>>
Walter Dropperwill - Thu, 10 Aug 2017 21:19:17 EST ID:QJ2Jjm/S No.275237 Ignore Report Quick Reply
one time i was in a hotel without a bottle opener so we just smacked the edge of the lid against a metal dresser handle. scratched it up a bit but otherwise worked like a charm
>>
John Femmerwater - Fri, 11 Aug 2017 22:18:57 EST ID:6CB99bga No.275255 Ignore Report Quick Reply
This 60-something year-old guy who lived a few doors down from me could slam a beer bottle against a hard surface at such an angle as to break the top part of the neck off, but not any more, so that he'd be left with a sharp rim to drink from.
I'm sure he ended up with broken glass in his stomach, but goddamn, it was cool to see him do it.
>>
Thomas Drusslepitch - Sat, 12 Aug 2017 13:43:34 EST ID:k6yZAmzl No.275266 Ignore Report Quick Reply
If you're the kinda person who always has a lighter then you always have a bottle opener.
People who use their teeth fuck me up, anyone have any dental damage experience related to this or am I bein a wimp?
>>
Nathaniel Cuvingsuck - Sat, 12 Aug 2017 18:50:15 EST ID:QJ2Jjm/S No.275268 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>275266

there is no doubt in my mind people have chipped their teeth from this, though i havent witnessed it myself, makes me internally cringe like a motherfucker when i see it
>>
Jarvis Dibblesedge - Sat, 12 Aug 2017 19:59:13 EST ID:rIAw48vy No.275269 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>275220
One time I was at a barbecue that was BYOB and we brought our beers but forgot to bring a bottle opener and then this guy opened like 8 in a row with the wedding ring on his finger.
>>
Ebenezer Gommersotch - Mon, 14 Aug 2017 19:38:45 EST ID:9aZZ5J5q No.275285 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>275220
Edges of bricks and tables n stuff, one time a friend of mine actually took a sizeable chunk out of a curb doing this lol. But the crudest way ive opened a bottle of wine is with a huge wood screw and a pair of pliers.
>>
Fanny Niggleked - Wed, 16 Aug 2017 18:07:38 EST ID:k6yZAmzl No.275292 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Anyone ever open corked wine by putting the bottle in a shoe and whacking it against a wall?
Nice alternative to smashing and just incredibly funny to witness when you're fucked up.
>>
Nigel Sunningwell - Wed, 16 Aug 2017 23:14:01 EST ID:QJ2Jjm/S No.275296 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>275292

haha what the fuck? im having trouble picturing this, can you describe it a little more please?
>>
Lydia Pittingstack - Thu, 17 Aug 2017 06:35:06 EST ID:wLCeqsvp No.275303 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>275296
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8EZZVIyVeQI
>>
Nigel Sunningwell - Thu, 17 Aug 2017 14:06:04 EST ID:QJ2Jjm/S No.275310 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>275303

wow i have never heard of this method before and its ghetto as fuck but it certainly seems to work
>>
Martin Blackworth - Thu, 17 Aug 2017 18:42:13 EST ID:ydJmX8xf No.275313 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>275303
that's really cool
I'm gonna bust that out at a party sometime
>>
Shit Medgedock - Thu, 17 Aug 2017 19:16:40 EST ID:2gxTVo8k No.275314 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>275313
>>275310
I feel like I would like to but none of the parties I'm at have those kinds of heels. Nor are there many bottles of wine. And the ones that ARE there are most likely capped.
>>
Phoebe Bligglesudging - Sat, 19 Aug 2017 00:38:08 EST ID:MQDLb6Zz No.275340 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>275303
Years ago I was preparing for a night out I had 2 liter bottle of red wine, but me being a dumbass didn't realize it was was corked and not capped when I bought it. So I spent a good 20 minutes in a drunken stupor digging away at the cork with a pocket knife.
>>
Ebenezer Sondlekun - Sat, 19 Aug 2017 03:03:06 EST ID:qJOyCJpH No.275344 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Opened a beer with my skateboard the other day
>>
Barnaby Fondlepen - Thu, 24 Aug 2017 00:15:09 EST ID:GDpDLvcZ No.275391 Ignore Report Quick Reply
1503548109465.jpg -(10033B / 9.80KB, 250x250) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size.
>>275220
>Niggas dont even saber your beer
>>
Johnny Coppafeild - Thu, 24 Aug 2017 04:54:04 EST ID:ZBagwb2Z No.275399 Ignore Report Quick Reply
1503564844018.jpg -(312689B / 305.36KB, 1280x960) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size.
One time I untwisted a cap off a corona extra.
>>
Matilda Blumblesutch - Sun, 27 Aug 2017 00:45:25 EST ID:LJb3WDBO No.275430 Ignore Report Quick Reply
shopping cart
>>
Cornelius Worthingdock - Sun, 27 Aug 2017 09:41:26 EST ID:eKXmBRm0 No.275433 Ignore Report Quick Reply
As a kid I sometimes used my teeth. Also I'm not fucking shitting you, the fat kid in high school actually opened a bottle with his stomach. Anyway, I just used a lighter, but who hasn't opened a bottle like that. Spoons are also common - they're better than knives because of the good grip on the head.
>>
Hugh Blabbleford - Sun, 27 Aug 2017 11:36:29 EST ID:iC7TyiE9 No.275434 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>275220
Reminds me of when I was trying to figure out how to open a bottle of beer in this parking lot and then my friend was like "i got you bro" and then proceeded to bash the head of the bottle on the concrete curb. Of course it instantly shattered and all my beer went down the sewer gate. I then asked him what the fuck he thought was going to happen and he was like, "I dunno I thought it would just pop off". Dumbass.
>>
Alice Menderfoot - Tue, 29 Aug 2017 16:48:26 EST ID:rTJmGfiv No.275461 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>Be Christmas in 2013/14
>Be sad 15yo who didnt get any presents and had to deal with yelling children and parents for a whole week
>Say fuck this shit and hike 2 miles into the woods near my house in 1.5 feet of snow
>go to local hangout smoke spot with my bowl and some ganj
>see a bottle in the snow
>Its totally full and unopened fuck yeah!
>big ass smirnof Ice 5% but hey its a xmas miracle
>spend a half hour trying to pop the damn thing open
>use a screwdriver i use as a pockey tool and a brick to hammer the screwdriver into the cap
>use leverage to fuck up the cap and finally pop it open
>cut myself abit
>drink it, smoke a few bowls, look at the bottle and realize it was a twist off
>KEK hard and go home feeling slighty better cause no tollerance to alcohol

>MFW my only present was probably from a drunk hobo that forgot his bottle in the snow

>
>>
Nell Fonnerhood - Wed, 30 Aug 2017 13:36:32 EST ID:8SEAjeQ5 No.275469 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>275220
Always a lighter.
>>
George Pockwell - Wed, 30 Aug 2017 19:50:56 EST ID:sw512Eec No.275476 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>275461
If there was a homeless guy who chose to spend his few precious coins on fucking Smirnoff Ice then we're better off without him in the gene pool
>>
Polly Wummerlat - Fri, 01 Sep 2017 07:16:38 EST ID:b4WOhddj No.275493 Ignore Report Quick Reply
I usually use a lighter.
>>
David Hinnerstone - Sun, 03 Sep 2017 00:32:07 EST ID:rEMxTAuu No.275515 Ignore Report Quick Reply
I generally use a lighter. It's kinda a party trick, but as someone who smokes and drinks, I found it pretty damn useful.
>>
Shit Mottingdon - Thu, 07 Sep 2017 10:56:15 EST ID:xEb5i1/g No.275565 Ignore Report Quick Reply
my bare hands
it left a hell of a bruise and tore a cut in one of my thumbs
but it was one of my proudest moments
>>
Hamilton Chenningwure - Mon, 11 Sep 2017 09:33:56 EST ID:VVJPDrPa No.275624 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>275220
I can't remember the single crudest one but some common ones I do return to are
Table edge
Other end of fork or spoon
Snus case

A crude tool I'll never use: my teeth
>>
Hamilton Chenningwure - Mon, 11 Sep 2017 09:36:14 EST ID:VVJPDrPa No.275625 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>275493

Forgot lighter, I use that too.
>>
Jack Hagglegold - Thu, 14 Sep 2017 00:07:50 EST ID:51ubZhu/ No.275648 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>275515
Once you learn the technique for using a lighter you can apply it to basically any object.


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