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Just Alcoholic Things~ by Caroline Perryspear - Mon, 15 Jan 2018 08:30:57 EST ID:rOlg7+2Y No.277176 Ignore Report Quick Reply
File: 1516023057685.png -(537174B / 524.58KB, 704x528) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size. 537174
post shit only truly forsaken alcoholics would understand

>when you finally bring yourself to eat actual food and you get so nauseous you start pouring sweat just trying not to puke it up

>when you gotta hide your fine motor actions from friends and colleagues or use both hands so they don't notice you shaking

>when you have alcohol on your breath after brushing your teeth 3 times

>when a firm, solid shit makes your week
Cornelius Cemmerdale - Mon, 15 Jan 2018 15:23:17 EST ID:q1qMVNVX No.277177 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>When you are literally hiding booze from friends and family because you know that they won't even notice if you have a few drinks, but will get upset if they see you drinking.
Dextrolord - Mon, 15 Jan 2018 21:18:38 EST ID:UBa+RGXH No.277180 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Lol I'd say that goes for most substances. For me it was do opiates in private so I didn't look sick as shit
Cedric Brosslebury - Mon, 15 Jan 2018 21:43:33 EST ID:pS6JYQov No.277183 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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>when you pretend you had a late breakfast and didnt wake up at 2pm and have no appetite because the only thing you've eaten was whiskey for 48 hours
>when you have a magical day when you don't wake up anxiety ridden and sick
>when you get off work and become giddy at the prospect of getting drunk at home for 3 days
Angus Sandlefone - Tue, 16 Jan 2018 20:12:37 EST ID:EriIG+/g No.277188 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>pretending it was just a "stomach bug" even though you've puked in the toilet once a week for the past 2 years
Hedda Sondershaw - Tue, 16 Jan 2018 21:57:09 EST ID:0iL/IY0w No.277189 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>customers at your wage slave job commenting on how much your hands are shaking

"YOU okay mister? Yo hands be shakin' an' shit hahahahahahah"

Holy shit I want a drink.
Eliza Sellernare - Wed, 17 Jan 2018 13:14:07 EST ID:JvF9TeVI No.277196 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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>when u homeless bum and are able to give a fuck
Eliza Sellernare - Wed, 17 Jan 2018 13:17:59 EST ID:JvF9TeVI No.277197 Ignore Report Quick Reply
fuck this unable
cuntilinguangina - Wed, 17 Jan 2018 16:10:57 EST ID:y38fmUVW No.277198 Ignore Report Quick Reply
fappo is a god

check out my new drinking strat: eating as much food as you possibly can
i can't tell you how insane my toilet is, now. it's something you must experience for yourself.

i actually enjoy steel reserve reserve, not regular but reserve reserve
Martin Sicklewene - Thu, 18 Jan 2018 18:49:43 EST ID:rOlg7+2Y No.277208 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>when your coworker complains they are hungover and you pretend to be sympathetic when you've been hungover 99% of the days you have ever been at work

>when you are chatting with someone and you mention subtly that you enjoy drinking and they ask "oh what do you like to drink?" and you fervently avoid admitting the answer is malt liquor and start talking about IPA's or Tito's to hide your depravity
Basil Fibbleville - Sat, 20 Jan 2018 00:32:06 EST ID:LazM8mpU No.277222 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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>when you drink to relax but you get so jittery from that whiskey and coke that you need more whiskey to calm your nerves.
Charles Honeylock - Sat, 20 Jan 2018 15:18:21 EST ID:FB9rdrjx No.277231 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>when you don't even enjoy drinking anymore but you still keep going
George Focklehall - Sat, 20 Jan 2018 17:55:35 EST ID:WVEl/fwu No.277233 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>Thinking you've slowed down drinking, but then realizing you can't remember the last night you were sober
>Spending more on booze than your rent/food

>and they ask "oh what do you like to drink?"
LOL. Yeah. That one always gets me, because my reflexive answer is "Anything".

Saying "anything" is apparently a dead giveaway.
Fucking Dodgestut - Sun, 21 Jan 2018 02:26:45 EST ID:IIo3Rfav No.277237 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>at line in subway buzzed on the ass end of a 4 day bender
>cannot for the life of me say "lettuce"
>stand there looking at it and wondering why I cant remember the fucking word
>"sir.. this?"
>"yes, that green shit"

This is when I know my brain cells are dying in droves
James Ninderhure - Mon, 22 Jan 2018 00:59:41 EST ID:pNmZ+kD0 No.277258 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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that was way funnier than it should have been
Sophie Crugglenat - Mon, 22 Jan 2018 14:45:24 EST ID:gVgWPnJz No.277262 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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>Be reminded of blacking out cause you load up a videogame save and find the result of what happens when a retard plays your games
Jenny Faffingfuck - Mon, 22 Jan 2018 18:21:05 EST ID:pS6JYQov No.277264 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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Holy shit last time I played Stellaris drunk as fuck I accidentally ceded half my empire away to a species I had Uplifted anyways. Tried to get it back but it ended up causing the now powerful and wealthy race to declare war against me, form a Federation with most of allies and orbital striked my ass into the stone age.
Would angrily quit and laugh about it later/10
That being said, today I forgot the word "plug" for about half an hour
My brain is turning to applesauce
Samuel Bommleted - Tue, 23 Jan 2018 14:23:48 EST ID:vOFnu5YH No.277272 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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I giggled while reading it. Then I remembered that I fucking hate myself and that's why I'm an alcoholic.

>when you tell yourself that you are gonna cut down on drinking but keep going because you already had 6 shots this morning.
Cedric Clorryfield - Tue, 23 Jan 2018 17:58:25 EST ID:q1qMVNVX No.277273 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Nothing like getting into a good conversation at a bar and then forgetting every other word you're trying to say.

>It's like that time I went to the *snaps fingers* aww shit whats it called *snap snap snap* the GYM that's it. And I was running on the, uhh, *looks at ceiling like there's writing up there* *snaps fingers* ELLIPTICAL!

This shit happens to me way too often.
Martha Dommlefun - Wed, 24 Jan 2018 01:42:19 EST ID:ikDoAUUs No.277282 Ignore Report Quick Reply
this is what happens when you mix autism + alcohol, and I know it all too well, life is suffering friend :(
dr. m !gWLn19/oKs - Thu, 25 Jan 2018 23:39:34 EST ID:g580SA28 No.277312 Ignore Report Quick Reply

>get home in the early evening and slam four shots of 40% back to back with sips of OJ

>30min later saying to yourself "man that shot didn't even do anything I'm 100% sober"

>wait I did four shots in 90 seconds but I'm 100% sober

George Nobblemedge - Fri, 26 Jan 2018 15:09:03 EST ID:oK6kMSGj No.277318 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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>When you're a full time college student (16 units) and you drink to curb the anxiety of all the work you have to do and then end up waking up the next morning with anxiety caused by hangovers/WDs
>When you're shaking and have a tight feeling in your chest and random body pains
>When it takes roughly an hour to wake up

Coffee truly is one of the best hangover cures. Gets rid of my grogginess right away but that anxiety does not go away man...

>When you smoke weed but you start feeling anxious and paranoid so you drink to calm down

I remember when weed by itself used to be fun. Now it just bumps up my anxiety to another level. I blame alcohol
Caroline Sizzlesere - Fri, 26 Jan 2018 22:12:24 EST ID:WVEl/fwu No.277321 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>Scrounging change to buy a 40 so you can sleep at night
>The 40 isn't nearly enough

>Resisting the urge to steal roommates' booze
>Stealing your roommates' booze
Ebenezer Buzzbury - Sat, 27 Jan 2018 09:45:52 EST ID:OFbvPhGk No.277331 Ignore Report Quick Reply
I remember a co-worker asking "what whiskey do you drink?". Since I don't really drink whiskey (mostly beer) I answered Wild Turkey. Damn did I look like an alcoholic that day.
Frederick Cringerwell - Sat, 27 Jan 2018 12:11:52 EST ID:BAikgIuL No.277335 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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Ian Happerson - Sat, 27 Jan 2018 15:01:23 EST ID:NUTCl//l No.277337 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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This thread makes me feel better about my own alcohol habit.
Basil Sidgechadging - Mon, 29 Jan 2018 02:55:50 EST ID:q1qMVNVX No.277364 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Just did this and immediately thought of this thread.

>Literally move beer cans out of the recycling so you can hide that 5th you've had in your room under all the empty cans
Reuben Honningsatch - Mon, 29 Jan 2018 04:46:18 EST ID:s9nu9NwX No.277365 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>when your coworker complains they are hungover and you pretend to be sympathetic when you've been hungover 99% of the days you have ever been at work
Oh god so true. The other one being when you are incredibly hungover and need to go along with shit thinking that there's no way most people would have made it into work on this kind of hangover.
Emma Morringworth - Mon, 29 Jan 2018 17:01:45 EST ID:WVEl/fwu No.277368 Ignore Report Quick Reply
My fave is going to work still dunk from the night before
Angus Grimhood - Mon, 29 Jan 2018 17:21:42 EST ID:jpRxU7G1 No.277370 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>When you're staying with a friend and his dad calls asking if you can help pick up and drive his car back from the shop but he wanted to make sure you weren't asleep or shitfaced

>Step into his car "I smell alcohol anon"

>mfw six drinks

>"I had A beer earlier..."
Jack Blythefoot - Tue, 30 Jan 2018 23:09:07 EST ID:rOlg7+2Y No.277384 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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>when you go to grab the 2nd 40oz. but you realize you already drank them both
>barely have a buzz, just drank two fucking 40's
Eugene Fibberbadge - Wed, 31 Jan 2018 00:04:15 EST ID:xo2lO6yt No.277385 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Holy shit, been there my dude
Clara Pittson - Wed, 31 Jan 2018 12:21:02 EST ID:EsYxBPYc No.277386 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Same tbh. My weed habit on the other hand.
Charles Chidgedock - Wed, 31 Jan 2018 19:58:57 EST ID:93JrBQAJ No.277391 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Nothing wrong with a weed habit

Weed is the drug of gods, i love alcohol but weed is just a whole different level of good
Priscilla Shittingham - Sat, 03 Feb 2018 23:09:52 EST ID:kVagurMJ No.277425 Ignore Report Quick Reply
toasting in a post AIDS
Edwin Cresslewell - Sun, 04 Feb 2018 20:59:18 EST ID:WVEl/fwu No.277437 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Anyone else always get the shits when they stop drinking?
Cedric Hibblesat - Mon, 05 Feb 2018 12:57:19 EST ID:swB5ZpH7 No.277443 Ignore Report Quick Reply
i dont drink much but i recently drank heavily 4 days in a row for the first time in a long time and my shits look terrifying.
Clara Cinningpad - Mon, 05 Feb 2018 16:09:48 EST ID:wlA2DW1g No.277447 Ignore Report Quick Reply
It's been a while since I've been on /hooch/ or this site in general and these threads have never failed to make me feel better about my rate of drinking and behavior, my shit is usually limited to blowing all my money on cases of beer and food or being told to leave drinking establishments
Nell Cobblestock - Mon, 05 Feb 2018 18:10:18 EST ID:hHiYWhSc No.277448 Ignore Report Quick Reply
When you’re scared to stop drinking because you’ve had 10-20 drinks everyday for the past 3 months or so
Lillian Bunbanks - Mon, 05 Feb 2018 21:37:56 EST ID:b1wOgn54 No.277451 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>i want to slip an entire person up my ass
>pretty sure the constant diarrhea will help
Phineas Medgeson - Tue, 06 Feb 2018 19:27:04 EST ID:/by1tcg2 No.277474 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>fall asleep wasted as shit
>wake up and there's a full glass of booze right next to you
>immediately start drinking it
William Bronderway - Tue, 06 Feb 2018 20:38:38 EST ID:LazM8mpU No.277475 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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I have never been asked to leave a bar establishment because of my behavior.
I have been stumbling getting out of a bar establishment after blowing over 100 dollars on liquor and barely making it into the cab, and not being sure how i got home.
Emma Parringwater - Wed, 07 Feb 2018 10:45:32 EST ID:WVEl/fwu No.277481 Ignore Report Quick Reply
I mean, why waste it? While we're on the subject...

>breakfast beer
True breakfast of champions is coffee and beer. I know some will say whiskey in the coffee is better, but I'm all about the hydration of beer in the morning. Gotta stay hydrated.
Phineas Medgeson - Wed, 07 Feb 2018 11:51:54 EST ID:/by1tcg2 No.277484 Ignore Report Quick Reply
whisky in tea is GOAT
Wesley Ponderway - Wed, 07 Feb 2018 21:48:51 EST ID:kVagurMJ No.277488 Ignore Report Quick Reply

it's a hard knock life
Rebecca Sunningchag - Wed, 07 Feb 2018 23:57:22 EST ID:rOlg7+2Y No.277490 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>when you find hidden bottles of liquor or hidden 40's stashed inside your square stand-up lamp, or in the back seat of your car, or random shit where you hid it when you were drunk
Frederick Banderhare - Fri, 09 Feb 2018 01:29:48 EST ID:b77HkJcy No.277500 Ignore Report Quick Reply
That there is called instantly drunk and feeling good and keep drinking. Used to pour the last of vodka bottle in water. wake up, take a big drink and think, oh shit,
I'm fucked now. Keep drinking knowing easy $$ is passing by every time the phone
rings but too buzzed to do simple tasks, like talking to people over said phone.
Barnaby Wamblepatch - Sat, 10 Feb 2018 21:34:05 EST ID:euanRhX+ No.277518 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>when you have alcohol on your breath after brushing your teeth 3 times

Alcohol primarily exits the body through the lungs, you retard.
George Wollybag - Sun, 11 Feb 2018 20:01:36 EST ID:A6a1fxGY No.277527 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>tfw you mix alcohol and first time snorting Ketamine (actually anything really)
>Tfw end up puking guts out at the end of the night
>tfw had friends who were just as fucked up as I was who helped me out and got me a trashcan when I asked for it
>Tfw when I said something about burning up my friends reached for the rum in the freezer and rubbed it against my back/let me put it on my forehead
Get you fuckers some friends like that. They're some real life savers
Molly Fuckleville - Tue, 13 Feb 2018 09:13:06 EST ID:ue9Pet16 No.277538 Ignore Report Quick Reply

do you feel better now that you established your superiority to an anonymous internet stranger? did it distract you from your creeping loneliness and existential dread, if only for a brief moment?
Priscilla Hinnerdale - Tue, 13 Feb 2018 20:06:10 EST ID:ukl4Ta26 No.277543 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Not knowing basic fundamental facts about a drug you're doing would get you laughed off any other board, but yes, I enjoy exercising my superiority. Why wouldn't I?
Dextrolord - Wed, 14 Feb 2018 01:45:29 EST ID:FHvsELTS No.277547 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Bitch Bill Cosby we are all drunk here just roll with the punches please
Martin Gonkindale - Wed, 14 Feb 2018 08:06:27 EST ID:mN/EyxSf No.277551 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>angry drunk
Edward Worthinglock - Sat, 17 Feb 2018 08:47:24 EST ID:LazM8mpU No.277566 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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Just had a random vomit at 630am.
Got drunk and partied last night.
Got a pizza on the way home at like 230.
I had no expectations of being up this early but I suddenly snapped awake to vomit into the garbage can at the foot of my bed.
In my stupidity and the darkness, I knocked it over and puked all over the side of the can, spreading my puke onto my clothes, sheets, and stuff.
Took a shower, swiffered the room, and took out the trash. Laundering bedsheets and lots of clothes now.
Martin Boblingset - Sat, 17 Feb 2018 15:10:03 EST ID:ue9Pet16 No.277568 Ignore Report Quick Reply

ah yeah 2 of the classic alco symptoms: disrupted sleep where you wake up earlier than normal, and delayed nausea that hits you when you think you are good. sometimes i will have the whole morning pass by no problem then out of nowhere i get a debilitating wave of nausea at like 2PM
George Lightdale - Sun, 18 Feb 2018 18:27:30 EST ID:yUxcMQzo No.277575 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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>When you don't know what being sober feels like anymore because you've been in a cycle of drunkenness/hangover with the occasional withdrawl for most of your adult life.
Nathaniel Ficklekare - Sun, 25 Feb 2018 07:05:34 EST ID:dwauyInm No.277633 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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AAAAAAA FUCK. Man i have quit for 3 months or so (which is a major triumph) but i resonate with all of you.
You are actually quite retarded.

Free K (god tier drug) and people on standby? I need some of these friends.
Phineas Bizzlehone - Tue, 27 Feb 2018 15:18:32 EST ID:qtoU1J0S No.277650 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>sometimes i will have the whole morning pass by no problem then out of nowhere i get a debilitating wave of nausea at like 2PM
it's not exactly out of nowhere, it's because you sober up at that time, get in tune with your body and you will be able to time your pukes
Augustus Blobberhon - Tue, 27 Feb 2018 18:59:55 EST ID:LsM6uqna No.277653 Ignore Report Quick Reply

lol nigga it's not about sobriety at that stage. sober occurs during the sleep, the wave of afternoon nausea is withdrawal
Sidney Seddlelon - Wed, 28 Feb 2018 10:00:49 EST ID:WVEl/fwu No.277657 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>sober occurs during the sleep
You'd be surprised. Try out a breathalyzer the morning after heavy drinking.
Hugh Fuffinghall - Thu, 01 Mar 2018 03:10:49 EST ID:GHFLwdVq No.277662 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Yeah this. They say your body can only metabolize ~1 drink every hour so If you have 12 drinks in a night in a few hours, there's gonna be a couple drinks left in you when you wake up depending on how long you sleep.
Eugene Drullymun - Thu, 01 Mar 2018 23:44:41 EST ID:gYtwoKTb No.277668 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Can confirm. I knew a friend who got fired after management surprised him with a breathalyzer the morning after he drank until 2am.
Shitting Pammerlock - Fri, 02 Mar 2018 19:40:33 EST ID:xrAsjA7D No.277677 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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how about
>shaking plus nausea makes cooking even ramen an adventure
>your drinking stories are always the best
>you were fired because of drinking on the job
>every chance at a better life was ruined due to selfish love of drinking
>you wouldn't know how to express your joy at being diagnosed with cirrhosis, but already know two family members who have died from it
It's ugly, but there is a better way. seek help, friend it's never too late
Simon Pocklekut - Sat, 03 Mar 2018 00:35:07 EST ID:k+MnW2fk No.277680 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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Bump on one of those sad/tired drunks that tend to happen sometimes when you drink everyday and then have nothing to do. Trying to watch some anime or the wire but can’t keep focused because I’m super lethargic atm but don’t want to sleep. Anyways bump on the like 15 beers and 5 shots I’ve had today (more than usual since I got off work early)
Simon Pocklekut - Sat, 03 Mar 2018 00:36:10 EST ID:k+MnW2fk No.277681 Ignore Report Quick Reply

Oops wrong thread though this was BWD

guess it still fits tho

Nathaniel Nuddlewill - Tue, 06 Mar 2018 01:37:04 EST ID:kFJmPfVa No.277692 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>Bump while alcoholic

>Switched from shots to whiskey gingers because I was drinking shots too fast
Emma Shittingstone - Tue, 06 Mar 2018 19:16:25 EST ID:SMGwsMP2 No.277695 Ignore Report Quick Reply
yeah that's the way, flavors mix much more naturally than with coffee
cools your tea down for immediate drinking too
Simon Sezzleheck - Wed, 07 Mar 2018 03:05:02 EST ID:Eav1GPjt No.277699 Ignore Report Quick Reply
i'm so glad i quit drinking
Rupert Pupkin - Wed, 14 Mar 2018 23:56:40 EST ID:qMBr91T0 No.277790 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Coming to
Glued to the floor
By something that leaked out of you
On the night before
Then it hits you
The disappointment
The Pain
It wasn't enough
You have to do it again
David Dubberham - Thu, 15 Mar 2018 01:08:52 EST ID:jLLgcdg9 No.277791 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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I feel ya. I drink like 10-15 drinks everyday after work and I’m kinda scared to stop now cuz I’ve been doing it for probably close to 6 months now. I haven’t been drinking at work because it would wreck me and I wouldn’t even be able to do it. But some days I come up with excuses to be late or not show up so that I can nurse a hangover or whatever. I’m probably going to try to taper off soon before it gets even worse. I’m thinking after st. Patty’s but we’ll see if I can even do it.
Lydia Drobbleman - Thu, 15 Mar 2018 13:43:16 EST ID:pX9MKmDg No.277799 Ignore Report Quick Reply

at first i was gonna be like 'no dont do it' but then i saw this post. yeah. please do it as fast as possible.
Albert Mezzleridge - Sat, 17 Mar 2018 23:31:14 EST ID:3iLXOpjn No.277824 Ignore Report Quick Reply

Don't you have anything you hate and rather walk to the next gas station instead of drinking this shit? I grew tired of Jägermeister pretty quickly.
Betsy Sennerhune - Sun, 18 Mar 2018 06:49:07 EST ID:pIoTNzLh No.277826 Ignore Report Quick Reply
have you tried switching to liquor? unless you shat yourself in which case i am all out of ideas
Phyllis Wuvingnedge - Wed, 21 Mar 2018 23:41:40 EST ID:0iL/IY0w No.277867 Ignore Report Quick Reply

It's bad when you perform better when still drunk, or drinking in the morning. My job involves collecting money from the indigent and I feel on fire when I drink a few shots before work and collect much more than normal and get props for it. On hungover, didn't-drink-before-work days I don't do much at all.
Samson - Wed, 04 Apr 2018 10:45:42 EST ID:iiqDNW1e No.277989 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>tfw used to just do this, but now even that's not enough and I have to take shots in the morning to even function at work
I started drinking heavily because I want to die, but this is just making my life even shittier, and now I can't stop
Eugene Dartridge - Wed, 04 Apr 2018 15:19:58 EST ID:4XluSafC No.277992 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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>drank heavily all day yesterday
>not sure if I even ate food or water
>puking all morning, can't even hold down water
I mean I fucked up but yay alcoholism so fun kill me plz
Jarvis Lightwell - Wed, 04 Apr 2018 22:14:01 EST ID:pX9MKmDg No.277997 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>when you go to talk to your boss about your alcoholism because you have no one you can talk to and because you have a good friendship and you trust her but it turns out she's more of one than you
Thomas Simmlenack - Sat, 07 Apr 2018 04:29:02 EST ID:tSz4loN+ No.278012 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>When you wake up in the morning still a bit drunk, and you know you have to rush to the shop, buy drinks and start drinking because WDs can hit in any time and then you're fucked

>When you reach the shop, buy beers, but you can't wait till you go home, so stand in the corner and drink a liter of beer as fast as you can

>When that 1 liter you just drank is only enough to make you a bit more comfortable and not panic that much until you get home and start to drink the remaining 8 liters.
Nathaniel Pappernock - Sat, 07 Apr 2018 17:53:24 EST ID:pX9MKmDg No.278016 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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i definitely know that feel brother
Samuel Trotforth - Sun, 08 Apr 2018 01:15:16 EST ID:ZcKTuuPo No.278019 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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>when you drink everyday because it's the only thing in your life that you get enjoyment from
Samuel Soshsod - Sun, 08 Apr 2018 14:13:52 EST ID:VVJPDrPa No.278020 Ignore Report Quick Reply

I don'¨t yet I guess I'm luckier than I sometimes think.
Graham Pockstock - Mon, 09 Apr 2018 00:10:12 EST ID:GHFLwdVq No.278022 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Give it time, grasshopper.
Henry Shakeshit - Mon, 09 Apr 2018 07:45:31 EST ID:ksfr6Cfq No.278023 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>throwing your life away
>even when high-end peeps love yer sheets
Barnaby Turveywell - Mon, 09 Apr 2018 13:01:38 EST ID:WVEl/fwu No.278026 Ignore Report Quick Reply
They're lying.
Shit Babberspear - Tue, 10 Apr 2018 11:12:17 EST ID:wZ2WeAtk No.278035 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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>when you finally bring yourself to eat actual food and you get so nauseous you start pouring sweat just trying not to puke it up
That's me on a t-break.
Edwin Sidgewog - Thu, 12 Apr 2018 04:50:56 EST ID:pdmV3gDg No.278060 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>scrounging around in your pockets for dimes and nickels in the middle of the night so you can buy a 40 of steel reserve so you can sleep
Sophie Fashmot - Thu, 12 Apr 2018 14:27:28 EST ID:s6Ea+XLV No.278063 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Me too
Graham Saddleham - Thu, 12 Apr 2018 21:39:12 EST ID:7eR5yfL2 No.278068 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Primary metabolism occurs in the liver, metabolites are passed in the urine.
the last 5% of the alcohol leaves unchanged through the lungs and urine in comparable amounts.

But yeah brushing teeth clears the smell of drink out of the mouth, not the smell of alcohol leaving the body through the lungs.
Albert Sorringtune - Fri, 13 Apr 2018 16:09:41 EST ID:2GpamE+y No.278075 Ignore Report Quick Reply

>when you finally bring yourself to eat actual food and you get so nauseous you start pouring sweat just trying not to puke it up

That's especially bad when i completely run out of weed and alcohol at once after i've been drinking hard without eating for days at a time. Try to smoke resin and it takes the edge off for about 15 minutes.

Trying to guzzle lukewarm tap water down while you're shivering in bed in a pool of sweat just puking up warm water and bitter green bile every 5 minutes. Feels nice for about 5 minutes after the puking then I crawl back in bed again with that feeling. It only lasts about a 1 or 2 days and I go out and get food weed and more booze afterwards.
Shitting Blammerfun - Sun, 15 Apr 2018 11:43:49 EST ID:H2H/ny52 No.278097 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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>when you can't fucking hold on to anything without using two hands

>when your phone looks like a splintered jigsaw puzzle

>when you're actually surprised that your shit is solid

>OJ tastes weird without vodka

>when your friends all want to go out partying that night, but you've been drinking since nine am so you show up to the first bar already drunk

>when there is more than one establishment that you're no longer allowed in for all the blacking out and skipped bar tabs
Clara Nonnerchane - Fri, 20 Apr 2018 01:36:12 EST ID:whxSa7Jp No.278132 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>"shitting" 5 times a day. aka water leaking out your ass in the morning and after every time you eat anything or drink too much liquid
Nigel Blinningfig - Fri, 20 Apr 2018 02:34:53 EST ID:gGocJqsm No.278136 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>un opened bottle of beer

Henry Wisslebirk - Sat, 21 Apr 2018 15:23:08 EST ID:WVEl/fwu No.278161 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>Liver pain after a really heavy night
> Stomach pain when eating

Charlotte Drudgehun - Sat, 21 Apr 2018 16:19:14 EST ID:GHFLwdVq No.278162 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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Nathaniel Brannerstine - Sun, 22 Apr 2018 11:23:30 EST ID:tkw83Qzv No.278174 Ignore Report Quick Reply
that looks like america
Shizam - Thu, 26 Apr 2018 00:55:12 EST ID:ad+NRNor No.278193 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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>when you start shitting blood
>when you eat maybe every 2 days
>when you almost lose your job cause you passed out and didnt show up
>when you can barely pay your rent cause you spend all your money on alcohol
>when you start getting stomach pains
Charles Fuckingwell - Sat, 28 Apr 2018 00:29:37 EST ID:FhctVRDM No.278210 Ignore Report Quick Reply
I know the feel. I wanted to get a bottle earlier today but couldn't think of an excuse to go out. Finally decided to go get some food around 730 pm.

>tfw your state's (SC) liquor store closes at 7pm
Augustus Clozzlefotch - Sat, 28 Apr 2018 07:01:09 EST ID:tFV6tIKR No.278213 Ignore Report Quick Reply
I've switched from drinking a litre of whiskey to a few lines of meth. No cravings for booze, well I"m drink a few shots a day to stave off withdrawals I don't want to have a seizure and meth prob ably would make that more liekly.

I had to stop because I couldn't get drunk anymore, only barely tipsy and it wasn't worth it. Having to drink to feel normal is shit.
Fucking Brookson - Sat, 28 Apr 2018 14:43:07 EST ID:vPJWCXof No.278215 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>substituting meth for alcohol
Ya dun goofed
Beatrice Gucklecocke - Sat, 28 Apr 2018 20:03:23 EST ID:a64nAo5c No.278217 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Yeah, to the guy who started taking lines of meth in place of his booze habit......Bad idea man. Keep it up and you'll be shooting meth within a year. Guaranteed.
Polly Blugglewill - Sat, 28 Apr 2018 22:05:57 EST ID:pX9MKmDg No.278218 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>when, like clockwork, the delayed withdrawal symptoms hit you exactly 1 hour before your drinking time and you have to wait for the most intense waves of nausea to pass before you can start drinking to make the withdrawal go away
Graham Worthingshit - Sun, 29 Apr 2018 00:51:07 EST ID:FAM9BgDz No.278219 Ignore Report Quick Reply
i blame meth for ruining weed, but i can only get stoned when im absolutely wasted and barely feel it or else i'll get so anxious i almost have a panic attack
life is a shit
John Soddlefit - Sun, 29 Apr 2018 02:25:45 EST ID:mlBDc0Vo No.278220 Ignore Report Quick Reply
another one if it's not posted yet:
>finding a bunch of stale-smelling empties whenever you open a drawer or cabinet at home
Beatrice Pinnersuck - Mon, 30 Apr 2018 10:08:09 EST ID:7n/nIkNd No.278239 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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>Pee in empty can
>wake up in morning
>mistakenly drink out of can
>piss tastes like alcohol
Basil Nicklespear - Mon, 30 Apr 2018 17:39:01 EST ID:UD085gBj No.278243 Ignore Report Quick Reply
awesome invention, got to try it out myself
Samson - Mon, 30 Apr 2018 22:45:50 EST ID:iiqDNW1e No.278247 Ignore Report Quick Reply
my room is about 60% empty liquor bottles at this point
Augustus Piblingchidging - Tue, 01 May 2018 20:15:57 EST ID:GHFLwdVq No.278251 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Not as bad as

>be drinking 40's of steel reserve
>also be sick and hacking up tons of phlegm
>can't finish the nasty bottom part of a 40
>use it as a spitoon for my disgusing phlegm
>get piss drunk on 3 or 4 40's
>go to drink the dregs of one of the beers
>it's my phlegm
Simon Darrynadge - Tue, 01 May 2018 22:14:22 EST ID:0rVI/BZr No.278252 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>waking up with your family and friends pissed off at you and you have no idea why

lol it was a bad one
Walter Fullyshit - Tue, 01 May 2018 23:30:39 EST ID:vPJWCXof No.278253 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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Got nauseous reading this
Samson - Wed, 02 May 2018 00:20:02 EST ID:iiqDNW1e No.278254 Ignore Report Quick Reply
idk, I think piss is still worse than phlegm, even old phlegm mixed with nasty malt liquor
Hedda Bebblekare - Thu, 03 May 2018 07:39:45 EST ID:sGsbLpac No.278271 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>tfw you convince your wife to do all sorts of things that'll take up her time by herself (such as adjudicating for debate clubs) so that you have more time to drink
Before I met her I drank all day erry day. I'm a good boy now who confines himself to drinking on Friday and Saturday evenings (a whole box of goon each night) but the itch is getting strong. Right now she's in our study doing some work for the debate club. I've immediately whipped out the goonbag and chugged most of it. Sober to fucked in 5 minutes.

I do all sorts of bad things in my life and feel guilty. Masturbating, eating junk food, etc. But this...there's no guilt. I feel good.

That might just be the liquor talking though.
Graham Hundlechack - Thu, 03 May 2018 08:44:50 EST ID:+fDKZASo No.278272 Ignore Report Quick Reply
thats fucking sad man, why is she your wife if you prefer drinking alone over her?
you know how this will end
Doris Derringmeck - Thu, 03 May 2018 13:40:27 EST ID:vPJWCXof No.278274 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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>tfw your loving wife is an obstacle to getting hammered alone and browsing the internet
wow what a bitch
Samuel Grandford - Thu, 03 May 2018 19:12:24 EST ID:H86Ertd7 No.278280 Ignore Report Quick Reply
too real, man.
Shit Clupperlock - Fri, 04 May 2018 00:01:26 EST ID:yeaPfvUv No.278282 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>Falling asleep on your city's subway system after a night of boozing
Jack Sellerville - Fri, 04 May 2018 02:19:06 EST ID:BDmT4m8y No.278283 Ignore Report Quick Reply
thats standard, not alcoholic. i see a lot of 17 year olds passed out on the subway on a sunday morning
Caroline Dablingson - Fri, 04 May 2018 05:32:58 EST ID:K2ECLYom No.278284 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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>tfw aspiring alchy
ill get there some day bois. it took me several trys to type thid
Thomas Brobberbanks - Fri, 04 May 2018 08:51:59 EST ID:WVEl/fwu No.278290 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>Every morning your face is bloated and eyes bright red, almost demonic looking.
Clara Seffingforth - Mon, 07 May 2018 06:57:18 EST ID:wLCeqsvp No.278315 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>mistake half empty vodka bottle for piss bottle
>drink that shit anyway because alcohol
Fuck Sinderwater - Mon, 07 May 2018 17:40:25 EST ID://FVtLop No.278318 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>when the only thing you do while sober is clean up everything you did while drunk
>when you plan to do something else besides drink but then 8 hours of work goes by
>when you give up so when you get the bright idea to do something instead of drinking you tell yourself "say that again after working 8 hours"
Fucking Sondlemut - Mon, 07 May 2018 22:06:35 EST ID:7n/nIkNd No.278319 Ignore Report Quick Reply
do you mean

>mistake piss bottle for half empty vodka bottle
Hannah Gonderson - Tue, 08 May 2018 07:24:23 EST ID:GHFLwdVq No.278321 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Or half full???
Hedda Fidgeville - Tue, 08 May 2018 07:44:50 EST ID:1DnhEeYb No.278323 Ignore Report Quick Reply
I think he pissed in his vodka then continued to drink it
which is totally understandable. if booze is expensive in your place there's no way i'd throw out half a bottle just coz of a little piss
Jarvis Sollydock - Tue, 08 May 2018 19:10:33 EST ID:lFzatDsR No.278328 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Standard alcoholic anyway. Not god forsaken.
Nell Deffingstone - Mon, 14 May 2018 10:08:59 EST ID:4lwnM24E No.278377 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>When you buy expensive whiskey to treat yourself from time to time
>2 hours later the bottle is empty
>buy cheap beer to finish the job
Nigel Dublinghall - Mon, 14 May 2018 10:16:27 EST ID:1V2E/lN5 No.278378 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>when you polish off 12 beers but the night isn't over so you bust out the cooking wine
Simon Mittingduck - Tue, 15 May 2018 13:05:05 EST ID:7n/nIkNd No.278382 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>drinking alcohol to work up the motivation to walk and buy more alcohol

>hungry but not eating so I can get more fucked up
Hannah Bicklelare - Tue, 15 May 2018 14:25:59 EST ID:FHw6EcUb No.278383 Ignore Report Quick Reply

Ugh, filthy degenerates. You alcoholics make me sick!

Now where's that cough syrup I was about to chug?
Beatrice Dreshstock - Tue, 15 May 2018 17:43:43 EST ID:MLAdK1xZ No.278385 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Betsy Punkinshaw - Wed, 16 May 2018 04:20:07 EST ID:V1W1/SUt No.278391 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Sounds like a positive to me. Gotta be a way to use this to your advantage.
Edward Nennerstone - Wed, 16 May 2018 18:56:37 EST ID:tSz4loN+ No.278395 Ignore Report Quick Reply
I'm so fucking tired of alcoholism. Every fucking day i wake up feeling like utter shit, then i have to walk to the fucking shop to buy a shitton of fucking alcohol. I need to change what i'm drinking because i get disgusted of anything if i drink it for more than 3 days, so i have beer days, wine days, and hard liquor days cycling. But i have to drink it and i don't want anymore, i'm disgusted of fucking drinks but i have to drink to get a few hours without withdrawal, panic, etc. My nerves are fucked, i'm shaking, jerking, i'm weak, i'm tired, i'm in pain, all day, every day. Recently discovered that two of my teeth has rotten. i've really had enough of all this shit. I want to quit but i can't. Tried several times but failed. I feel that i should kill myself because i can't bear this suffering anymore. I'm poisoning my body every day, and now i'm so sick. i'm also depressed which drives me back to drinking if i'm finally gather strenght to put it down. I'm really just going to kill myself, i can't bear this anymore.
Martin Nicklebury - Wed, 16 May 2018 19:10:49 EST ID:L9YZrLpP No.278396 Ignore Report Quick Reply
i definitely drink too much and am finding it harder and harder to stop myself lately, but the problem is I still love drinking. I feel like when you get to this stage isn't a lot easier to convince yourself to try to taper or even get medical help and try a benzo taper?
Samuel Sushfoot - Wed, 16 May 2018 20:11:06 EST ID:GHFLwdVq No.278397 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Have you tried rehab? It's not the solution but it's helpful to have a sheltered environment to clear your head. And it's not so bad as people portray it.

I've never been an alcoholic but other drugs and it is tough but you just gotta do it. I mean there is no answer that will make it easier, you just gotta tough through it rly. One way to look at it is that you're suffering regardless. It will be worth it to suffer a bit more for a little while. It feels really good to wake up and feel healthy.
Sidney Cheblinghood - Wed, 16 May 2018 23:47:12 EST ID:Dvb+fqN2 No.278400 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>when you read ops long post and give up
Sidney Sovingsot - Thu, 17 May 2018 04:16:12 EST ID:3/5Zd2NT No.278410 Ignore Report Quick Reply
too real.
Barnaby Goodson - Thu, 17 May 2018 19:58:56 EST ID:dYp7+GdR No.278415 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>when it's literally safer for you to pound a beer before driving anywhere than it is to drive to completely sober because of how bad your hands shake
Nicholas Dushlack - Fri, 18 May 2018 20:16:05 EST ID:MRETjAQL No.278431 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>waking up and walking 6km to burn off some of the vodka calories you'll be consuming when you get home
Alice Blesslebet - Fri, 18 May 2018 21:43:44 EST ID:hjcAGZAJ No.278433 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>eating light throughout the day so the booze hits hard and fast at night on an empty stomach
Emma Turveyspear - Sat, 19 May 2018 01:52:25 EST ID:OPHJj0it No.278435 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>when you run out of booze

Nathaniel Brarryhood - Sat, 19 May 2018 15:57:25 EST ID:mlBDc0Vo No.278439 Ignore Report Quick Reply

>buying a fifth of rum and it's empty in the morning

i feel like i've actually accomplished something. never managed to the entire fifth before.
Molly Pullydock - Sun, 20 May 2018 00:43:42 EST ID:mlBDc0Vo No.278447 Ignore Report Quick Reply
i was properly fucked when i typed that. should say:

>only getting drunk once off the fifth because you accidentally the whole thing the first night
William Bunway - Sun, 20 May 2018 15:09:46 EST ID:/ztN1AQR No.278453 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Imagine if next to the water pipes we had booze pipes and you could pour yourself a drink whenever you want
Isabella Gindlewud - Sun, 20 May 2018 16:56:58 EST ID:YoTRrD1A No.278454 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>"I'll just get one beer. It might as well be a high gravity 22 oz"
>"I'm just going to have one beer tonight, I sure am watching my intake"
>Back at the gas station to buy a 12 pack within 15 minutes
>Proceed to drink all 12 beers as well as the 22 oz

Oh well. It's the fucking pringles curse of alcoholism. Once you pop the fun don't stop.
Alice Crashshit - Mon, 21 May 2018 04:39:55 EST ID:WVEl/fwu No.278458 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>fall asleep holding drink
>stay asleep for like half an hour
>Wake up because drink spills on you
>finish drink
Charlotte Fillerlodging - Mon, 21 May 2018 05:03:07 EST ID:uWw1AQ2W No.278459 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>be at work
>furiously chewing mint gums
>trying not to breathe near coworkers
Albert Bemmerneck - Tue, 22 May 2018 12:43:23 EST ID:A8T/DJsQ No.278474 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Probably been said, but
>can’t eat anything until a few drinky poos go down
>masochistically love the burn of liquor on an empty stomach, esp in the morning
>hide liquor in water bottle at work, and convince myself no one notices (they probably do)
>stomach is literally iron and it takes an obscene amount very quickly to cause me to throw up
>those rare moments when you hit the perfect drunk state and surgeon’s hands appear
Gnarly McGoblin - Tue, 22 May 2018 18:48:47 EST ID:ILieLoa/ No.278480 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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>I made this
William Brookway - Wed, 23 May 2018 07:16:31 EST ID:8QA5ThsE No.278494 Ignore Report Quick Reply

Nice, dude. How does it work?
Esther Clollycocke - Wed, 23 May 2018 09:51:39 EST ID:c1B23Kso No.278496 Ignore Report Quick Reply
No idea but it does
Nathaniel Doggleshit - Wed, 23 May 2018 17:27:12 EST ID:k1w2sgd3 No.278498 Ignore Report Quick Reply

Fuckin' sweet! By the way, I'm not an alcoholic guys. I'm just addicted to getting high in general. I don't really have a particular drug of choice, but I probably use more weed than anything.

Although, I sometimes I drink a lot for a short period of time.
James Bunningstone - Wed, 23 May 2018 18:36:55 EST ID:Fzy0QMa4 No.278502 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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Augustus Sivingworth - Wed, 23 May 2018 21:18:34 EST ID:0iL/IY0w No.278506 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>tfw when you have bright white lines like crescents below every one of your nails

I'm fucked man, I knew a dude with those got diagnosed with liver failure years later, he still gets drunk every day but he'll probably die soon and I'll die a couple years later.
Jack Sacklekack - Thu, 24 May 2018 04:14:42 EST ID:bETV/8ql No.278511 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Mardi gras motherfucker
Esther Changerforth - Fri, 25 May 2018 03:39:33 EST ID:/ztN1AQR No.278515 Ignore Report Quick Reply
what? I thought everybody had those
Betsy Dibblepire - Fri, 25 May 2018 07:24:38 EST ID:wLCeqsvp No.278516 Ignore Report Quick Reply
White crescents/half moons at the bottom of your nails are a sign of good health

White nails with a red-ish line at the top could be Terry's Nails which could be a sign of liver problems.
Jarvis Peshgold - Fri, 25 May 2018 08:11:45 EST ID:c1B23Kso No.278517 Ignore Report Quick Reply
what about slightly brown half moons little above nalis, on fingers? no, I don't have dirty hands
Walter Crallerdale - Fri, 25 May 2018 21:12:54 EST ID:svH47kN7 No.278522 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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>when one morsel of food makes your heart rate sky-rocket
Reuben Fottingpin - Sun, 27 May 2018 13:11:28 EST ID:WVEl/fwu No.278544 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>Random tingling sensations from nerve damage
Jenny Suddlesudging - Mon, 28 May 2018 21:57:07 EST ID:tSz4loN+ No.278558 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Is that really from nerve damage? I'm having those too, and i thought it's caused by high blood-sugar (some alcoholic "pre-diabetes").
Nell Ducklock - Tue, 29 May 2018 03:18:42 EST ID:kBt/8YAu No.278559 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Walter Claddleville - Wed, 30 May 2018 19:17:48 EST ID:ZGgDzJJG No.278576 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>when you ruin your love life by being a depressed drunk mess

Trying to get sober now to fix things but chances are I'll probably fuck it up

>tfw you fuck up everything because of drinking
Augustus Channinglock - Fri, 01 Jun 2018 20:43:21 EST ID:EMqiQcuk No.278611 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>when you cancel dates with grils and meetings with friends because you'd rather drink alone
Angus Geppernudge - Fri, 01 Jun 2018 20:47:59 EST ID:LazM8mpU No.278612 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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happy friday to me :)
Cyril Dimblesene - Fri, 01 Jun 2018 21:15:13 EST ID:WVEl/fwu No.278613 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Not like they miss us
Polly Feffingchud - Sat, 02 Jun 2018 01:47:51 EST ID:hxxZvJe6 No.278618 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>When you really want to believe you can have one or two drinks with your neighbor and call it quits.

>When 5 days later you've been drinking nonstop after quitting for 3 months and have nearly spent $200 on booze and now you're a depressed fuckass for even entertaining the notion that maybe you cured your alcoholism.
Ian Gonkinpug - Sat, 02 Jun 2018 20:55:23 EST ID:9TAcgmWA No.278622 Ignore Report Quick Reply
> I can't get drunk without wanting to go out there and score weed.

and I can't smoke weed without having at least an alcohol buzz going and alcohol on standby to counteract the panic. Or benzos, but alcohol seems to work much better in counteracting weed dread.

Once you've tasted dread on weed in high doses you'll never truly feel safe with weed again.

Trying to score weed while drunk kinda ruins the night and the fun too, I fucking hate this circle!
Lydia Duckville - Mon, 04 Jun 2018 00:26:37 EST ID:Fzy0QMa4 No.278625 Ignore Report Quick Reply
I did this for a while. Weed would just make me anxious but I'd have a couple beers or just power through it to appreciate the high while gaming/watching movies/chilling with people.

After a while I couldn't justify it anymore. I'm obviously not enjoying it if I have to work that hard to make the high bearable, so I cut way back. I just take a couple hits to relax on the weekends now.
Cornelius Worthingfield - Tue, 05 Jun 2018 03:11:02 EST ID:GZKVYpxN No.278633 Ignore Report Quick Reply

how the fuck could you ever allow yourself to be out of booze? i always have like 4 layers of booze reserves in rotation, i have never lacked booze in the past 10 years
George Denderhall - Wed, 06 Jun 2018 00:05:34 EST ID:mlBDc0Vo No.278647 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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currently using a pair of cutting goggles to internet without the screen making my headache worse.
Sidney Blythehall - Wed, 06 Jun 2018 09:03:10 EST ID:wLCeqsvp No.278656 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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A real alcoholic (functioning or not) always makes sure that there's a healthy supply at home or include a personal beer/liquor run into any other plans.
Martha Cummerwell - Wed, 06 Jun 2018 22:06:10 EST ID:gV29yp2V No.278662 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Yeah, I've had those since I was a kid. I'm pretty sure they're just drunk.
Isabella Hurrydock - Wed, 06 Jun 2018 22:08:06 EST ID:hT9gveYC No.278664 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Doris Turveyshaw - Wed, 06 Jun 2018 23:10:57 EST ID:WVEl/fwu No.278667 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>trying to calculate how much you spend on booze every month
>Stop, because it's just way too much and you don't really want to know

Booze is by far my biggest expense. More than rent, utilities, transportation and food for sure. How much more? IDK the calculation is scary.
Hannah Sosslehodge - Thu, 07 Jun 2018 00:52:02 EST ID:Fzy0QMa4 No.278668 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>implying you need to worry about rent, utilities, transportation and food when you can just be hammered all the time
Go for a walk nigga there's tons of people just roaming around getting wasted 24/7 and enjoying free food out of dumpsters, it's the ez life. You just gotta commit
Hannah Sosslehodge - Thu, 07 Jun 2018 00:56:19 EST ID:Fzy0QMa4 No.278669 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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oh and the best part is that strangers will buy all your booze for you, you just have to catch them right as they're exiting their office building and be really obnoxious harassing them and telling blatantly obvious BS sob stories while preventing them from getting to their car after work until they give you a couple bucks to make you fuck off
Boom you've got a 40oz right there. No joke homie you could be living this right now. The only question is if you got the balls to follow your dreams
Samson - Thu, 07 Jun 2018 01:38:50 EST ID:iiqDNW1e No.278670 Ignore Report Quick Reply
when I encounter such people (plenty here in the sf bay area), I like to cut out the middleman by just giving them some of whatever I'm drinking, usually cheap malt liquor
Beatrice Gettingsare - Thu, 07 Jun 2018 19:39:14 EST ID:L9YZrLpP No.278677 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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Thomas Drorrypad - Thu, 07 Jun 2018 19:52:24 EST ID:sYodSTw7 No.278678 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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>Me trying to quit drinking like
Edward Settingstock - Fri, 08 Jun 2018 04:18:11 EST ID:wLCeqsvp No.278683 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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Samuel Garringhetch - Fri, 08 Jun 2018 04:36:49 EST ID:+4rFi5/c No.278687 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>IN COLLEGE forgetting capslock is on
>only meth when drunk
>buy more vodka
Frederick Worthingcocke - Fri, 08 Jun 2018 17:59:43 EST ID:9leqweT+ No.278690 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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This shitty meme is fucking right. Gotta be careful, guys. I lost all my savings in a couple of car crashes, my parents trust, some cellphones, lots of money on bitches and have had terrible moral hangovers over the last couple of years.
William Wockledock - Sat, 09 Jun 2018 08:24:33 EST ID:n4SeGIh7 No.278693 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>When a transgendered progamer you've never heard of calls you asking how you're doing and telling you that you used to be friends and were planning to meet up and fuck several years ago.

Strangest phone conversation of my life.
Martin Grandford - Sat, 09 Jun 2018 13:14:16 EST ID:Sfftf0BP No.278694 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Who /drinking at work/ here?
Martin Grandford - Sat, 09 Jun 2018 13:14:16 EST ID:Sfftf0BP No.278695 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Who /drinking at work/ here?
George Wuggleson - Sun, 10 Jun 2018 09:39:53 EST ID:WVEl/fwu No.278702 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>be 28
>look 48
>Never get ID'd
Cornelius Dopperspear - Tue, 12 Jun 2018 01:06:59 EST ID:pdmV3gDg No.278721 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>be 21
>can count on one hand number of times I've been ID'd
George Munkindick - Tue, 12 Jun 2018 06:15:28 EST ID:RtdTdpAC No.278723 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>disrupted sleep where you wake up earlier than normal
Apparently that's to do with a spike in glutamine production or something like that. Happens with every hangover.

One time I woke up and heard my flatmate up and about and knew he was off for a job interview. I thought I'd pop in and say good luck before he left for it. Turns out he'd been and gone and it was 2pm, rather than early in the morning like I'd thought.

Honestly I think I've managed to sleep through a morning hangover maybe once or twice. Every other time I'll wake up between 6-8 and struggle to get back to sleep.
Molly Chollerpare - Mon, 18 Jun 2018 19:07:31 EST ID:K6GY+3H4 No.278797 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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I'm seeing double.
George Crondlebury - Mon, 18 Jun 2018 20:06:44 EST ID:GZKVYpxN No.278802 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>when 3 different people in your class who you barely know independently call you out for being an alcoholic when you thought you were being lowkey about how often you mentioned drinking and all you can do is sheepishly smile and shrug
Sophie Honeyway - Wed, 20 Jun 2018 07:48:03 EST ID:wLCeqsvp No.278835 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>when co-workers at the office party are surprised you can drink so many beers without becoming tipsy
Sidney Bizzlebot - Wed, 20 Jun 2018 10:19:34 EST ID:9aZZ5J5q No.278836 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>roatate liquor stores you go to so the employees dont realize how often you really drink
>chain stores
>employee pulling a double shows up at the other store for 2nd shift after you already saw her on 1st shift at her usual store
Henry Ducklock - Wed, 20 Jun 2018 14:44:11 EST ID:yXFvomkr No.278840 Ignore Report Quick Reply
tbh i am on the verge of transcending that shit. i might get consistently drunk a few days in a row while writing reports and summaries and stumble to pick up the next bottle of cider, but at least i dont work the cash register at 45. so whatever scournful look somebody may give me is countered by a false sense of superiority and over compensating faux politeness.

"hello again, here to pick up the next round?" the middle aged woman says
-i just love how comfy you look behind that register, have a wonderful evening.
John Mendercocke - Thu, 21 Jun 2018 18:00:13 EST ID:nqiHh+FE No.278853 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>spleen doesnt hurt
>under collarbone area doesnt hurt
better drink before the pain returns
John Mendercocke - Thu, 21 Jun 2018 18:05:06 EST ID:nqiHh+FE No.278854 Ignore Report Quick Reply
you mean weekdays?
Wesley Willystick - Wed, 27 Jun 2018 22:51:12 EST ID:bNdfqtGL No.278898 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>girlfriend/boyfriend hide they wallet when they get home

>people don't invite you to anything because of the insane shit you do
Shitting Brondlefield - Thu, 28 Jun 2018 23:45:21 EST ID:xo2lO6yt No.278910 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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>drinking at the office party
Wesley Secklecocke - Fri, 29 Jun 2018 01:32:55 EST ID:qY8+1S/k No.278914 Ignore Report Quick Reply
I worked for a dry cleaning company. A Christmas party during working hours. Damn, !.75 bottles of vodka, etc. Too much alcohol for a handful of people.

Girl who worked there was riding a cart rolling around that you fold clothes over and making horsey sounds in front of customers,

oblivious to her appearance to customers, everybody. I drank but was a pretty well seasoned drinker by 17, 18. So I was cool, my associate was cool, he didn't really drink much. Disaster. Was planning on getting a KEG regardless, the instant party thing had just popped up.

short drunk dude, told the worker to come over over before they were out of it. The smaller guy who get riled up thinking they are invincible. I wasn't home with the keg. Told him to call to make sure I was home anyway before he would come over. Left a message, "I was here ASSHOLE, where were you?" The snow on the driveway had multiple speedout marks on it. Along with the street. Coming up I assumed it was him from the top of the street judging by the erratic tracks. Definite pullover material. Needless to say, got a keg and accociate who didn't drink much, ended up hours later getting to his girlfriends house who he was going to marry. Bla bla bla. Got back to my house and it was me him and her with a half keg? Full?
I could have made a call and had an instant party. Associates girlfriend would have freaked by the people that would have shown up. So I guess didn't bother. Needless to say I din't go back to work there again. Just had collected my check and drank on the keg for however long.

Depends on people who you work with at work parties, or wherever, If they can maintain their
basic composure, even if totally hammered. just basic composure I guess.

By the way, I should have exited the place with a couple of liter's and 1.75 bottles. Not like anybody would have really missed these.
Ebenezer Hippershaw - Fri, 29 Jun 2018 10:16:36 EST ID:SIs7LUqN No.278922 Ignore Report Quick Reply
How drunk are you man? I thought that I'm retarded for not being able to understand posts, but it turns out you posted semi-gibberish in every thread
Beatrice Suzzlestack - Fri, 29 Jun 2018 13:49:39 EST ID:sYodSTw7 No.278923 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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I'm assuming that English isn't his first language the way he keeps bringing up "Instant party" and 1.75 bottles.

He could be completely blasted though, and if that's the case he may never remember to come back and check up on these posts. We may never get a definite answer...
Ebenezer Hippershaw - Fri, 29 Jun 2018 16:29:27 EST ID:SIs7LUqN No.278924 Ignore Report Quick Reply
English ain't my first language either, but I browsed enough chans to recognize posting patterns. From the vocab used I'd guess he's a native speaker, frankly it really resembles schizophrenic posting
Barnaby Poblingpan - Fri, 29 Jun 2018 17:05:32 EST ID:kf4TcaHF No.278925 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Drinking at an office party isn't bad, getting shitfaced is. I usually have 2-3 beers then bounce since I'd rather not hang out there for too long anyway. I can understand if you drink uncontrollably once you start though.
Lillian Feddlewell - Sat, 30 Jun 2018 13:49:36 EST ID:6b+H6Ihl No.278936 Ignore Report Quick Reply
That's pretty bad, you ever gone back to work after a bender and forgot what year it was?
Nathaniel Dartwell - Sat, 30 Jun 2018 18:01:45 EST ID:DhpkwGF1 No.278937 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Probs just a drunk post.
> 1.75 bottles.
1.75L . It's a handle. Ever hear someone say a 750, as in 750ml, as in a fifth, as in a fifth of a gallon, as in a normal wine/liquor bottle?

>"Instant party"
What's not to get? It's a party. Instantly..
Ernest Ginkinfot - Wed, 04 Jul 2018 06:30:19 EST ID:4QaMsZVK No.278960 Ignore Report Quick Reply
What is this 'every' thread?
>>How drunk are you man? I thought that I'm retarded for not being able to understand posts, but it
>>turns out you posted semi-gibberish in every thread

>What is every thread?

>>I thought that I'm retarded for not being able to understand posts,

Enough to sound semi-dumb.
Ernest Ginkinfot - Wed, 04 Jul 2018 07:21:18 EST ID:4QaMsZVK No.278961 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>instant party? You mean Christmas party? The point was redirected to work parties.

Surely you know that two half pints = what? Is it more, less, or the same as a pint.

A handle? OK. Go to an upscale liquor stare and ask for a handle of whatever liquor. It is common these days of young drinkers to refer to it as that. The liquor store owners I have known, never ordered cases of handles. Nor refer to them as handles to customers. The Order forms never say handles. Distributors would think, what an idiot if people ordered cases of handles. 1.75 is what it is. I never called a 1.75 bottle a handle, like let's get a handle!

>He could be completely blasted though, and if that's the case he may
>never remember to come back and check up on these posts.

You sound like a complete idiot. But remember to check on these posts, what is there to actually see.

>We may never get a definite answer...

You sound like a complete idiot. I say craving for attention or something. But definite answer to what?
What does that even remotely mean? who is we? And What are you supposed to be?
Nell Bangerbore - Wed, 04 Jul 2018 12:42:38 EST ID:bPSpSzqQ No.278965 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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Idk where the fuck you live but 1.75 liter bottles are frequently referred to as handles you fucking goober
Charlotte Clavingville - Wed, 04 Jul 2018 19:05:58 EST ID:GZKVYpxN No.278968 Ignore Report Quick Reply

maybe in metric land you nerds call it a "one point seven five" but in america we call it a handle.
Doris Giblinggold - Wed, 04 Jul 2018 21:00:09 EST ID:RDtUrPl8 No.278972 Ignore Report Quick Reply

Well, you Americunts express yourself pretty funny. I mean, english language is shitty and you make it worse. Gracias a Dios mi lengua natal es el español.
William Fucklegold - Thu, 05 Jul 2018 10:31:22 EST ID:wLCeqsvp No.278981 Ignore Report Quick Reply
We just call em "bottle" and if the particular brand has a large variant (1.5 or 2 litre instead of 1) we call those "large bottle".

I think that dude just wanted to specify exactly how much he drank
Thomas Smallway - Fri, 06 Jul 2018 09:20:15 EST ID:hv45XRfn No.278994 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Yeah, the language chosen by international lawyers and business men is shitty, camacho.
John Billingstock - Fri, 06 Jul 2018 09:53:45 EST ID:siYvQGXL No.278996 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>4th is on a Wednesday
>start drinking on Monday
>have a lot of fun with fireworks
>check the calendar
>it's the 6th
>it's probably time to stop
>but you've already had 5 morning beers
Tomorrow is the day...
Isabella Gashgold - Tue, 10 Jul 2018 17:03:29 EST ID:EkhdZvD0 No.279042 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>I mean, english language is shitty and you make it worse
Please elaborate. What's the difference between "the English language" and "American," to you, that the second is worse?
Martin Suvingway - Wed, 11 Jul 2018 06:15:18 EST ID:C/E/pBLz No.279050 Ignore Report Quick Reply
It's all about pronouncation of ''schedule''
Henry Grandspear - Wed, 11 Jul 2018 18:12:44 EST ID:EkhdZvD0 No.279053 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Christ, is this fucking hilarious or am I just nice and drunk?
Barnaby Buttingridge - Wed, 11 Jul 2018 19:51:02 EST ID:PUeN41Kh No.279058 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>go to a store and buy a shit ton of any kind of alcohol you like
>yell out loud (so anyone in the store can hear) about how you're having a party with your friends or go camping with like 12 of them or something and joke about random stuff with the clerks
>meanwhile all the booze you're buying is actually for yourself.

I mean, I don't drink but if I did this is the type of excuses I'd come up with when buying booze.
Henry Drushwen - Thu, 12 Jul 2018 08:57:56 EST ID:wLCeqsvp No.279067 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Pretty much what I tell myself when I look at all the shit I'm about to buy
>damn this is a lot of alcohol for one person
>I bet they think I'm throwing a party
>I guess I throw a party every night because I have lots of friends
Cedric Fettingway - Sun, 15 Jul 2018 11:53:36 EST ID:KVpJ2i+i No.279091 Ignore Report Quick Reply
this.. AF.
Nell Hannerkare - Sun, 15 Jul 2018 15:23:18 EST ID:esbxeu0D No.279093 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>When you're the main character of the story your friends are telling you and you have no idea what is gonna happen next

>Insist that you remember everything

>Have friends that believe you when you say you remember everything.

>Ask friend why she took my bracelet

>Friend gets pissy and throws it back yelling, 'You gave it to me last night."

>Lie and say you do actually remember and try to give it back to her
Esther Goodlock - Sun, 15 Jul 2018 20:02:18 EST ID:vFsVUdGi No.279098 Ignore Report Quick Reply
no you faggots, do this. i'm about to change your life.
>take quick look around
>make sure they don't sell jell-o mix
>get a shitload of cheap vodka
>put on counter
>"hey, do you guys sell jell-o mix"
>"nah man, sorry, but you can go to (insert nearby store)"
>"where is that again?" (act genuinely interested)
>"(they point or tell you the location)"
>"thanks, making jell-o shots tonight (if friday, saturday, sunday, holiday, etc) or this weekend (if weekday)
Ernest Smallstone - Sun, 15 Jul 2018 23:55:43 EST ID:GZKVYpxN No.279105 Ignore Report Quick Reply

lol not bad, pretty sneaky
Caroline Bardstock - Mon, 16 Jul 2018 02:05:19 EST ID:hEemcRr1 No.279106 Ignore Report Quick Reply

>when you don't give a shit how often you walk into the liquor store and how much of an alcholic you look like because you're a grown ass adult and can make your own life decisions
Caroline Bardstock - Mon, 16 Jul 2018 02:07:09 EST ID:hEemcRr1 No.279107 Ignore Report Quick Reply

>When you realize you don't have to give a shit how often you walk into the liquor store and how much of an alcoholic you look like because you're a grown ass adult who can make their own decisions.
Sophie Blarringtadge - Mon, 16 Jul 2018 03:34:06 EST ID:DhpkwGF1 No.279111 Ignore Report Quick Reply
This is retarded. Just buy the booze. No need to lie about who it's for. Think they give a shit? You're paying their goddamn bills. They love you, as long as you're not tryin to get free shit.
Caroline Bardstock - Mon, 16 Jul 2018 04:09:06 EST ID:hEemcRr1 No.279114 Ignore Report Quick Reply

When you realize you don't have to give a fuck about the frequency you visit the liquor store or the amounts you buy because you're a grown ass adult and can make your own decisions.
Shit Penderwell - Mon, 16 Jul 2018 10:36:58 EST ID:bPSpSzqQ No.279115 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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Imagine being so autistic you think you need an excuse to buy large amounts of booze
Samuel Shittinghall - Fri, 20 Jul 2018 01:22:33 EST ID:GZKVYpxN No.279187 Ignore Report Quick Reply

you just arent deep enough down the rabbit hole to understand
Gnarly McGoblin - Fri, 20 Jul 2018 10:45:52 EST ID:8C3MCgKX No.279189 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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>Getting kicked out of a ward after having a big fat relapse with 4.2 per mill
>Waking up bound up to the bed (kinda liked it)
>Waking up in diapers in a hospital... 2nd time this year.... (yeah I liked that, too)
Graham Bapperchare - Fri, 20 Jul 2018 14:19:28 EST ID:RDtUrPl8 No.279190 Ignore Report Quick Reply

I am, you fucking coward piece of shit. Grow some balls.
Thomas Firrydale - Fri, 20 Jul 2018 16:47:39 EST ID:C/E/pBLz No.279192 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Then most people are autistic according to you
Nigel Lightham - Fri, 20 Jul 2018 18:57:09 EST ID:DhpkwGF1 No.279195 Ignore Report Quick Reply
You're saying that most people come up with excuses for buying large amounts of booze? Who are these people?

Sure, sometimes a cashier gets judgey for seeing you buy the same shit every day. But that's rare. And when it happens, it's best to just find another place. Simple.

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