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Just Alcoholic Things~ by Caroline Perryspear - Mon, 15 Jan 2018 08:30:57 EST ID:rOlg7+2Y No.277176 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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post shit only truly forsaken alcoholics would understand

>when you finally bring yourself to eat actual food and you get so nauseous you start pouring sweat just trying not to puke it up

>when you gotta hide your fine motor actions from friends and colleagues or use both hands so they don't notice you shaking

>when you have alcohol on your breath after brushing your teeth 3 times

>when a firm, solid shit makes your week
Cornelius Cemmerdale - Mon, 15 Jan 2018 15:23:17 EST ID:q1qMVNVX No.277177 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>When you are literally hiding booze from friends and family because you know that they won't even notice if you have a few drinks, but will get upset if they see you drinking.
Dextrolord - Mon, 15 Jan 2018 21:18:38 EST ID:UBa+RGXH No.277180 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Lol I'd say that goes for most substances. For me it was do opiates in private so I didn't look sick as shit
Cedric Brosslebury - Mon, 15 Jan 2018 21:43:33 EST ID:pS6JYQov No.277183 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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>when you pretend you had a late breakfast and didnt wake up at 2pm and have no appetite because the only thing you've eaten was whiskey for 48 hours
>when you have a magical day when you don't wake up anxiety ridden and sick
>when you get off work and become giddy at the prospect of getting drunk at home for 3 days
Angus Sandlefone - Tue, 16 Jan 2018 20:12:37 EST ID:EriIG+/g No.277188 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>pretending it was just a "stomach bug" even though you've puked in the toilet once a week for the past 2 years
Hedda Sondershaw - Tue, 16 Jan 2018 21:57:09 EST ID:0iL/IY0w No.277189 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>customers at your wage slave job commenting on how much your hands are shaking

"YOU okay mister? Yo hands be shakin' an' shit hahahahahahah"

Holy shit I want a drink.
Eliza Sellernare - Wed, 17 Jan 2018 13:14:07 EST ID:JvF9TeVI No.277196 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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>when u homeless bum and are able to give a fuck
Eliza Sellernare - Wed, 17 Jan 2018 13:17:59 EST ID:JvF9TeVI No.277197 Ignore Report Quick Reply
fuck this unable
cuntilinguangina - Wed, 17 Jan 2018 16:10:57 EST ID:y38fmUVW No.277198 Ignore Report Quick Reply
fappo is a god

check out my new drinking strat: eating as much food as you possibly can
i can't tell you how insane my toilet is, now. it's something you must experience for yourself.

i actually enjoy steel reserve reserve, not regular but reserve reserve
Martin Sicklewene - Thu, 18 Jan 2018 18:49:43 EST ID:rOlg7+2Y No.277208 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>when your coworker complains they are hungover and you pretend to be sympathetic when you've been hungover 99% of the days you have ever been at work

>when you are chatting with someone and you mention subtly that you enjoy drinking and they ask "oh what do you like to drink?" and you fervently avoid admitting the answer is malt liquor and start talking about IPA's or Tito's to hide your depravity
Basil Fibbleville - Sat, 20 Jan 2018 00:32:06 EST ID:LazM8mpU No.277222 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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>when you drink to relax but you get so jittery from that whiskey and coke that you need more whiskey to calm your nerves.
Charles Honeylock - Sat, 20 Jan 2018 15:18:21 EST ID:FB9rdrjx No.277231 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>when you don't even enjoy drinking anymore but you still keep going
George Focklehall - Sat, 20 Jan 2018 17:55:35 EST ID:WVEl/fwu No.277233 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>Thinking you've slowed down drinking, but then realizing you can't remember the last night you were sober
>Spending more on booze than your rent/food

>and they ask "oh what do you like to drink?"
LOL. Yeah. That one always gets me, because my reflexive answer is "Anything".

Saying "anything" is apparently a dead giveaway.
Fucking Dodgestut - Sun, 21 Jan 2018 02:26:45 EST ID:IIo3Rfav No.277237 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>at line in subway buzzed on the ass end of a 4 day bender
>cannot for the life of me say "lettuce"
>stand there looking at it and wondering why I cant remember the fucking word
>"sir.. this?"
>"yes, that green shit"

This is when I know my brain cells are dying in droves
James Ninderhure - Mon, 22 Jan 2018 00:59:41 EST ID:pNmZ+kD0 No.277258 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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that was way funnier than it should have been
Sophie Crugglenat - Mon, 22 Jan 2018 14:45:24 EST ID:gVgWPnJz No.277262 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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>Be reminded of blacking out cause you load up a videogame save and find the result of what happens when a retard plays your games
Jenny Faffingfuck - Mon, 22 Jan 2018 18:21:05 EST ID:pS6JYQov No.277264 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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Holy shit last time I played Stellaris drunk as fuck I accidentally ceded half my empire away to a species I had Uplifted anyways. Tried to get it back but it ended up causing the now powerful and wealthy race to declare war against me, form a Federation with most of allies and orbital striked my ass into the stone age.
Would angrily quit and laugh about it later/10
That being said, today I forgot the word "plug" for about half an hour
My brain is turning to applesauce
Samuel Bommleted - Tue, 23 Jan 2018 14:23:48 EST ID:vOFnu5YH No.277272 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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I giggled while reading it. Then I remembered that I fucking hate myself and that's why I'm an alcoholic.

>when you tell yourself that you are gonna cut down on drinking but keep going because you already had 6 shots this morning.
Cedric Clorryfield - Tue, 23 Jan 2018 17:58:25 EST ID:q1qMVNVX No.277273 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Nothing like getting into a good conversation at a bar and then forgetting every other word you're trying to say.

>It's like that time I went to the *snaps fingers* aww shit whats it called *snap snap snap* the GYM that's it. And I was running on the, uhh, *looks at ceiling like there's writing up there* *snaps fingers* ELLIPTICAL!

This shit happens to me way too often.
Martha Dommlefun - Wed, 24 Jan 2018 01:42:19 EST ID:ikDoAUUs No.277282 Ignore Report Quick Reply
this is what happens when you mix autism + alcohol, and I know it all too well, life is suffering friend :(
dr. m !gWLn19/oKs - Thu, 25 Jan 2018 23:39:34 EST ID:g580SA28 No.277312 Ignore Report Quick Reply

>get home in the early evening and slam four shots of 40% back to back with sips of OJ

>30min later saying to yourself "man that shot didn't even do anything I'm 100% sober"

>wait I did four shots in 90 seconds but I'm 100% sober

George Nobblemedge - Fri, 26 Jan 2018 15:09:03 EST ID:oK6kMSGj No.277318 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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>When you're a full time college student (16 units) and you drink to curb the anxiety of all the work you have to do and then end up waking up the next morning with anxiety caused by hangovers/WDs
>When you're shaking and have a tight feeling in your chest and random body pains
>When it takes roughly an hour to wake up

Coffee truly is one of the best hangover cures. Gets rid of my grogginess right away but that anxiety does not go away man...

>When you smoke weed but you start feeling anxious and paranoid so you drink to calm down

I remember when weed by itself used to be fun. Now it just bumps up my anxiety to another level. I blame alcohol
Caroline Sizzlesere - Fri, 26 Jan 2018 22:12:24 EST ID:WVEl/fwu No.277321 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>Scrounging change to buy a 40 so you can sleep at night
>The 40 isn't nearly enough

>Resisting the urge to steal roommates' booze
>Stealing your roommates' booze
Ebenezer Buzzbury - Sat, 27 Jan 2018 09:45:52 EST ID:OFbvPhGk No.277331 Ignore Report Quick Reply
I remember a co-worker asking "what whiskey do you drink?". Since I don't really drink whiskey (mostly beer) I answered Wild Turkey. Damn did I look like an alcoholic that day.
Frederick Cringerwell - Sat, 27 Jan 2018 12:11:52 EST ID:BAikgIuL No.277335 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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Ian Happerson - Sat, 27 Jan 2018 15:01:23 EST ID:NUTCl//l No.277337 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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This thread makes me feel better about my own alcohol habit.
Basil Sidgechadging - Mon, 29 Jan 2018 02:55:50 EST ID:q1qMVNVX No.277364 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Just did this and immediately thought of this thread.

>Literally move beer cans out of the recycling so you can hide that 5th you've had in your room under all the empty cans
Reuben Honningsatch - Mon, 29 Jan 2018 04:46:18 EST ID:s9nu9NwX No.277365 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>when your coworker complains they are hungover and you pretend to be sympathetic when you've been hungover 99% of the days you have ever been at work
Oh god so true. The other one being when you are incredibly hungover and need to go along with shit thinking that there's no way most people would have made it into work on this kind of hangover.
Emma Morringworth - Mon, 29 Jan 2018 17:01:45 EST ID:WVEl/fwu No.277368 Ignore Report Quick Reply
My fave is going to work still dunk from the night before
Angus Grimhood - Mon, 29 Jan 2018 17:21:42 EST ID:jpRxU7G1 No.277370 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>When you're staying with a friend and his dad calls asking if you can help pick up and drive his car back from the shop but he wanted to make sure you weren't asleep or shitfaced

>Step into his car "I smell alcohol anon"

>mfw six drinks

>"I had A beer earlier..."
Jack Blythefoot - Tue, 30 Jan 2018 23:09:07 EST ID:rOlg7+2Y No.277384 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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>when you go to grab the 2nd 40oz. but you realize you already drank them both
>barely have a buzz, just drank two fucking 40's
Eugene Fibberbadge - Wed, 31 Jan 2018 00:04:15 EST ID:xo2lO6yt No.277385 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Holy shit, been there my dude
Clara Pittson - Wed, 31 Jan 2018 12:21:02 EST ID:EsYxBPYc No.277386 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Same tbh. My weed habit on the other hand.
Charles Chidgedock - Wed, 31 Jan 2018 19:58:57 EST ID:93JrBQAJ No.277391 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Nothing wrong with a weed habit

Weed is the drug of gods, i love alcohol but weed is just a whole different level of good
Priscilla Shittingham - Sat, 03 Feb 2018 23:09:52 EST ID:kVagurMJ No.277425 Ignore Report Quick Reply
toasting in a post AIDS
Edwin Cresslewell - Sun, 04 Feb 2018 20:59:18 EST ID:WVEl/fwu No.277437 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Anyone else always get the shits when they stop drinking?
Cedric Hibblesat - Mon, 05 Feb 2018 12:57:19 EST ID:swB5ZpH7 No.277443 Ignore Report Quick Reply
i dont drink much but i recently drank heavily 4 days in a row for the first time in a long time and my shits look terrifying.
Clara Cinningpad - Mon, 05 Feb 2018 16:09:48 EST ID:wlA2DW1g No.277447 Ignore Report Quick Reply
It's been a while since I've been on /hooch/ or this site in general and these threads have never failed to make me feel better about my rate of drinking and behavior, my shit is usually limited to blowing all my money on cases of beer and food or being told to leave drinking establishments
Nell Cobblestock - Mon, 05 Feb 2018 18:10:18 EST ID:hHiYWhSc No.277448 Ignore Report Quick Reply
When you’re scared to stop drinking because you’ve had 10-20 drinks everyday for the past 3 months or so
Lillian Bunbanks - Mon, 05 Feb 2018 21:37:56 EST ID:b1wOgn54 No.277451 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>i want to slip an entire person up my ass
>pretty sure the constant diarrhea will help
Phineas Medgeson - Tue, 06 Feb 2018 19:27:04 EST ID:/by1tcg2 No.277474 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>fall asleep wasted as shit
>wake up and there's a full glass of booze right next to you
>immediately start drinking it
William Bronderway - Tue, 06 Feb 2018 20:38:38 EST ID:LazM8mpU No.277475 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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I have never been asked to leave a bar establishment because of my behavior.
I have been stumbling getting out of a bar establishment after blowing over 100 dollars on liquor and barely making it into the cab, and not being sure how i got home.
Emma Parringwater - Wed, 07 Feb 2018 10:45:32 EST ID:WVEl/fwu No.277481 Ignore Report Quick Reply
I mean, why waste it? While we're on the subject...

>breakfast beer
True breakfast of champions is coffee and beer. I know some will say whiskey in the coffee is better, but I'm all about the hydration of beer in the morning. Gotta stay hydrated.
Phineas Medgeson - Wed, 07 Feb 2018 11:51:54 EST ID:/by1tcg2 No.277484 Ignore Report Quick Reply
whisky in tea is GOAT
Wesley Ponderway - Wed, 07 Feb 2018 21:48:51 EST ID:kVagurMJ No.277488 Ignore Report Quick Reply

it's a hard knock life
Rebecca Sunningchag - Wed, 07 Feb 2018 23:57:22 EST ID:rOlg7+2Y No.277490 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>when you find hidden bottles of liquor or hidden 40's stashed inside your square stand-up lamp, or in the back seat of your car, or random shit where you hid it when you were drunk
Frederick Banderhare - Fri, 09 Feb 2018 01:29:48 EST ID:b77HkJcy No.277500 Ignore Report Quick Reply
That there is called instantly drunk and feeling good and keep drinking. Used to pour the last of vodka bottle in water. wake up, take a big drink and think, oh shit,
I'm fucked now. Keep drinking knowing easy $$ is passing by every time the phone
rings but too buzzed to do simple tasks, like talking to people over said phone.
Barnaby Wamblepatch - Sat, 10 Feb 2018 21:34:05 EST ID:euanRhX+ No.277518 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>when you have alcohol on your breath after brushing your teeth 3 times

Alcohol primarily exits the body through the lungs, you retard.
George Wollybag - Sun, 11 Feb 2018 20:01:36 EST ID:A6a1fxGY No.277527 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>tfw you mix alcohol and first time snorting Ketamine (actually anything really)
>Tfw end up puking guts out at the end of the night
>tfw had friends who were just as fucked up as I was who helped me out and got me a trashcan when I asked for it
>Tfw when I said something about burning up my friends reached for the rum in the freezer and rubbed it against my back/let me put it on my forehead
Get you fuckers some friends like that. They're some real life savers
Molly Fuckleville - Tue, 13 Feb 2018 09:13:06 EST ID:ue9Pet16 No.277538 Ignore Report Quick Reply

do you feel better now that you established your superiority to an anonymous internet stranger? did it distract you from your creeping loneliness and existential dread, if only for a brief moment?
Priscilla Hinnerdale - Tue, 13 Feb 2018 20:06:10 EST ID:ukl4Ta26 No.277543 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Not knowing basic fundamental facts about a drug you're doing would get you laughed off any other board, but yes, I enjoy exercising my superiority. Why wouldn't I?
Dextrolord - Wed, 14 Feb 2018 01:45:29 EST ID:FHvsELTS No.277547 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Bitch Bill Cosby we are all drunk here just roll with the punches please
Martin Gonkindale - Wed, 14 Feb 2018 08:06:27 EST ID:mN/EyxSf No.277551 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>angry drunk
Edward Worthinglock - Sat, 17 Feb 2018 08:47:24 EST ID:LazM8mpU No.277566 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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Just had a random vomit at 630am.
Got drunk and partied last night.
Got a pizza on the way home at like 230.
I had no expectations of being up this early but I suddenly snapped awake to vomit into the garbage can at the foot of my bed.
In my stupidity and the darkness, I knocked it over and puked all over the side of the can, spreading my puke onto my clothes, sheets, and stuff.
Took a shower, swiffered the room, and took out the trash. Laundering bedsheets and lots of clothes now.
Martin Boblingset - Sat, 17 Feb 2018 15:10:03 EST ID:ue9Pet16 No.277568 Ignore Report Quick Reply

ah yeah 2 of the classic alco symptoms: disrupted sleep where you wake up earlier than normal, and delayed nausea that hits you when you think you are good. sometimes i will have the whole morning pass by no problem then out of nowhere i get a debilitating wave of nausea at like 2PM
George Lightdale - Sun, 18 Feb 2018 18:27:30 EST ID:yUxcMQzo No.277575 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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>When you don't know what being sober feels like anymore because you've been in a cycle of drunkenness/hangover with the occasional withdrawl for most of your adult life.

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