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Why we love to hate J.K. Rowling by George Cladgelat - Wed, 21 Jun 2017 08:05:39 EST ID:ylxQEmun No.69257 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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For a young man in the 21st century, J.K. Rowling embodies just about everything that he hates about his own mother, but can't outright say to her. An aging neoliberal single mother with an inflated sense of self-importance using twitter to cope with her increasing irrelevance. The sort of woman who hasn't seriously thought about any of her opinions, but feels the need to push them on to others and condescend to anybody who might think differently.

She is an archetype. Neither insightful nor funny nor controversial. She is a consummate mediocrity basking in the praise of similar mediocrities the world over who have projected their own aspirations on to her, satisfied that somebody like them is a billionaire. Her Christianity is an accessory. She takes everything that she's been taught by public school and daytime television and fashions a god out of it.

She conceives of public affairs in the nebulous terms of "love" and "hate". The fact that an action might fall outside of either of these two categories, or that something she deems "hateful" might in fact be the wiser choice has not occurred to her. Despite this, she is shockingly easy to bait into a bitter, spiteful rage. Furthermore, her generosity only extends as far as her personal comfort. At the end of the day, it's little more than virtue signalling and if social opinion undergoes some vast sweeping change then she'll fall in line.

In many ways, she's already missed the boat. Her brand of comfortable feminism has already fallen out of style. She just doesn't know it yet. The second wave man-hating sexual phobia that sees rape everywhere. Its frigidity is evident in her writing. Then the bizarre merger with proud slut queer positivity. The post-hoc declarations of characters' sexual proclivities. The rationalization of racial retconning. It's like she discovered a Harry Potter fan tumblr, followed a couple links, and incorporated whatever she saw, resulting in an incoherent schizophrenic worldview. That's probably exactly what happened.

Her name is fucking Joanne. Need I say more?
>>
George Cladgelat - Wed, 21 Jun 2017 08:09:24 EST ID:ylxQEmun No.69258 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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And one more thing. She has a surprisingly nice pair of tits that I'd really like to suck on.

She looks a lot like my own mother, but with nicer hair and way nicer tits. In fact, she's basically a more attractive version of my mother, which is great since the only thing that really held me back from fantasizing about my own mother is that she just wasn't good looking enough.

Rowling really seems like the kind of woman who'd suck her teenage son's dick. I mean it.

She gets back from le ebin GIRLS NIGHT OUT XD!!! Plastered out of her mind from sipping too much shiraz or perhaps pinot grigio. Maybe she and THE GIRLS even passed around a blunt at Samantha's house. I always find it funny when Gen X women think they're being SO BAD smoking weed. Mouth full of the most expensive cheese available at Tesco and whatever crackers Georgia had to get rid of. She's cackling with laughter and sobbing as she lurches in through the front door. She has zero self-awareness when it comes to her emotions, but defends them with religious fervor.

Clumsily, she makes her way toward the living room where her son is playing video games. She sits down on his lap, suffocating him with her embrace and exhaling the stinking fumes of cheap wine right into his face. For a couple minutes, she rants about what a BITCH Leslie at the office is, before muttering the he's the only on who understands her. Briefly, she looks into his eyes, trembling all over. Then she locks her mouth with his and begins to kiss him passionately. At first he is paralyzed, but his mom is kind of hot and he'll probably never have another chance like this. He's thought about it before. He kisses back and before long she's between his legs, pawing at his penis like the cats she collects. She takes it in her mouth and sucks it like she's back in college. She's STILL GOT IT.

The next morning, she pretends not to remember anything, but blames him for the incident, finding subtle ways to punish him.
>>
Henry Sunkinbudge - Wed, 21 Jun 2017 08:49:10 EST ID:6InGCNGZ No.69259 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>69258
cool story bro
>>
Charles Blatherdale - Thu, 22 Jun 2017 00:43:09 EST ID:e/ASfKSd No.69260 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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>>69258
>pawing at his penis like the cats she collects
>>
Betsy Fiffingchock - Thu, 22 Jun 2017 22:23:42 EST ID:Jp5dXAij No.69262 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>69257
so much fucking jelly in this post that its ozzing out of my screen and getting on my keyboard

> to cope with her increasing irrelevance
You know she still writes successful books, right?
>>
Clara Worthingcocke - Fri, 23 Jun 2017 08:58:14 EST ID:l05TS9f7 No.69263 Report Quick Reply
>>69262
The cringey part is that she publishes them under a male name. She acts like a feminist and then will hide her books under male titles because "she doesn;t like her new work being compared to Harry Potter".
>>
Augustus Ducklock - Sat, 24 Jun 2017 15:14:43 EST ID:qM6K+efP No.69265 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>69263
She published one name under a pseudonym. Her most successful novel post Potter was published under her own name. You're dumb.
>>
Lillian Sonningfedge - Sat, 24 Jun 2017 16:39:57 EST ID:N4/nqu0x No.69266 Report Quick Reply
>>69265
The one book written under her name post-Potter was critically panned and disliked by fans. She publishes a whole series of books under the psuedonym. I read one and disliked it, but critics and fans at least say they are good. You don't know what you are talking about.
>>
Clara Donningville - Sat, 24 Jun 2017 17:45:38 EST ID:Jp5dXAij No.69267 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>69266
You are correct
"The Casual Vacancy" was not well received, and published under her own name. The critics compared it to harry potter constantly, even though it was outside that universe. So, she decided that she wants to grow as a writer without the shadow of HP hanging over her, and thus a new series under a pseudonym was born

That series is pretty well received and successful, and even if it was published under a pseudonym the publishers (or lawyers? cant remember) leaked it was actually JK who write them.
>>
Charles Fonninghire - Sat, 24 Jun 2017 21:30:28 EST ID:N4/nqu0x No.69268 Report Quick Reply
>>69267
Right. And the point I was making was that it seemed odd for the biggest female author on the planet to call herself a feminist but then use a male name for her books. Feels slightly anti-feminist. It doesn't really matter to me one way or the other. I liked Harry Potter and would give some of her future works a chance probably. But IMO her script for the Fantastic Beasts film wasn't that good either.
>>
Isabella Nacklewure - Thu, 06 Jul 2017 05:59:50 EST ID:ylxQEmun No.69288 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>69268
She's just demonstrating that by using a male pen name, her writing gets way more popular acclaim than she ever did by writing under a woman's name.
>>
Molly Diblingstan - Fri, 07 Jul 2017 14:39:58 EST ID:b1syzmKp No.69289 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>69267
That whole thing of her pseudonym getting leaked was dumb . Made the whole thing pointless.

Of course the BBC made a film of the book, simply because t was Rowling.
>>
Molly Diblingstan - Fri, 07 Jul 2017 14:44:45 EST ID:b1syzmKp No.69290 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>69289
looks like i'm talking nonsense. It wasn't her fault the name was leaked.
>>
Martin Genningfoot - Tue, 11 Jul 2017 09:40:56 EST ID:RymZy2WR No.69292 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Harry Pottter blows. When all the kids (especially the dumb retards who'd usually never touch books) went crazy for it I was already reading Kafka and thought this wizard shit was as dumb as the crap you read at age 10 with vampires going to school or other bullshit.
>>
Cornelius Docklekadging - Tue, 11 Jul 2017 17:40:13 EST ID:8gO8FFO9 No.69293 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>69292
Well I was 10 when book 1 first came out and then wound up growing with the series. If I was in high school when the books started, I'd be as against them as you are, old man (it sounds like your five years older than me, so ur old af imo). When I hit high school and was similarly reading Kafka, Vonnegut, and Voltaire, it wasTwilight that fellow high schoolers were into that I thought seemed like it should be relegated to the 10 year olds. The English teacher was all "at least they're reading" and im like "bitch plz"
>>
Ebenezer Suppernit - Sun, 30 Jul 2017 08:50:42 EST ID:129jvgtB No.69319 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>69293

When I was 10 i'd already read all the books whose ideas she stole, so I'm the same age as you and I still think it's retarded.
>>
Esther Funningstid - Wed, 02 Aug 2017 08:51:33 EST ID:ylxQEmun No.69326 Ignore Report Quick Reply
I don't mean to panic anyone but is anyone else concerned about Neville? Yesterday I found him hiding away in the library looking up rapid-fire killing curses.

We joked about it, he said he was "planning something tragic" and winked at me twice, and I just laughed it off and said he should tell all the students to get in one corner of the room and then start casting spells, joking obviously, but he just nodded like he thought it was a good idea.

Then he started telling me about how his sister is dating a "mudblood" (um we call them muggles, Neville, it's 2017), and how he can hear them fucking through the wall when he goes home in the summer. Also how he splashed somebody with Butterbeer on a trip to Hogsmeade because they brought it up (wizard kek what an autist)

Anyway, he ended the conversation by putting his hand on my shoulder and saying I "was alright" and that I "shouldn't go to herbology tomorrow."

He was definitely just joking, right?
>>
Ian Bemmlenedge - Thu, 31 Aug 2017 18:54:28 EST ID:vlNXwxPB No.69388 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>69292
You sound like a total retard. You don't read books like it's a fucking competition, I'm sure you're one of those guys who reads the most books you can just to go to other people and brag about how many thousands of book reviews have you written in goodreads.

Try reading a book just because you enjoy it not because you want to be a bigger prick than those around you
>>
Molly Grandway - Sun, 10 Sep 2017 15:17:47 EST ID:Ei2xcaIb No.69412 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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>>69388

I think Ebenezer sounds more like a retard than Cornelius.
>>
Phyllis Goodman - Tue, 12 Sep 2017 00:36:53 EST ID:ZWAR2X1l No.69414 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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https://samkriss.com/2016/09/13/jk-rowling-and-the-cauldron-of-discourse/
>>
Graham Geffingpedge - Thu, 14 Sep 2017 11:58:17 EST ID:+VKso4p6 No.69418 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>69388
what kind of a moron doesn't enjoy Kafka

You know some people enjoy thinking. We find it unbearable when authors spoon-feed us childish ideas that are all stolen from things the rest of us read when we were 7.

it is boring.
unoriginal.
poorly written.


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