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Bipolar disorder by Wesley Bunningnark - Mon, 30 Apr 2018 12:03:51 EST ID:L/ms1gom No.523759 Ignore Report Reply Quick Reply
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Anyone in here fell in love/lived with a bipolar gf? What was it like?
Appreciate the answers.
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Jenny Bemmerworth - Mon, 30 Apr 2018 19:11:58 EST ID:Jz9T8qdt No.523768 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Is it anything like dating someone when you are bipolar? I feel like it's like dating a bipolar girl except there's no cute involved and the sexy doesn't excuse anything.

Goddamn I'm bipolar as fuck.
>>
Nicholas Lightbury - Mon, 30 Apr 2018 19:53:33 EST ID:glZ6cPk8 No.523770 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>523768
I think im bipolar and im dating a bipolar girl.
However i might just be a normal person? sometimes i feel depressed, sometimes i feel happy. and she might just be a normal woman? sometimes she cries about stupid shit, sometimes she wants to suck my cock 24/7 out of sheer love.
what even is bipolar? back then it was just called people
>>
Hedda Honeylock - Mon, 30 Apr 2018 21:08:37 EST ID:yDKihQN5 No.523775 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>523759

Bi polar looks very different from person to person.

I’m bi polar and tbh I’d imagine it’s like dating anyone else for the most part. Maybe with the exception of mood swings that take me from chirpy impulsive extrovert to depressed reclusive introvert. During those times il just be a little quieter and maybe unhappy. It may be relatively unknown why.

I had a relationship for 3 years and with the exception of the occasional impulsive dumping (happened maybe once a year) it was fairly smooth. No arguments, no horrible things, no particularly sharp turns. I would just kinda dive bomb here and there and need someone to hug me.

Bi polar is mostly internal, it’s portrayed poorly because only the extremes are ever remembered. Idk dude, borderlines are the ones you need to be keeping watch for.
>>
Shit Meckletere - Tue, 01 May 2018 15:56:29 EST ID:3A/9rSkO No.523787 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>523770
The trouble with mood swings is that they feed into themselves, and if you're not good enough for whatever neurological tweak that allows you to bring yourself up when you're down (or conversely, bring yourself down when you're up), it deregulates fast. Think of it not as a series of episodes but a pendulum that has started to swing fast. In other words, it's structural: the only way to fix things is to take the reigns of the pendulum disk inside the clock. Humans aren't machines, but we all have our pendulums, and the pendulum is always at danger of running too fast.

We sane few have a delicate balance to walk on, you know.
>>
Frederick Chondlesane - Tue, 01 May 2018 19:11:04 EST ID:CtEX1hBv No.523796 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>523759
It was great for a time, she was very attached to me, sometimes very angry but never toward me, I was a kind of protector for her, she could be herself with me and loved me deeply. But we couldn't see each other enough because of shitty reasons, it became a long distance relationship and after a stronger bipolar episode than usual, her love completely faded away and she found someone else.
It lasted 8 years for me, it was a real emotional roller coaster but I don't regret one bit because that's how I expect from a relationship that matters.
They're crazy and not trust worthy. If you still want to bet everything on her, make sure to never leave her alone.


I keep fucking up my life by Edwin Niffingchud - Sat, 21 Apr 2018 17:20:36 EST ID:QkN9pOBF No.523577 Ignore Report Reply Quick Reply
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First time poster here. Before I get started, I read some of the other threads on here and they made me feel a little better, I'm thankful I'm not addicted to heroin or anything. Not trying to gloat over any of y'all that are, I hope you all get the help you need.

That actually kind of ties into my issues: normally I try to stay positive but it's getting harder by the day. I'm 30 and I live with my parents. They're great and amazingly supportive but I'm living with them because I went back to school to get my teaching certificate. Basically put my life on hold for 2 1/2 years to do it and went into debt but I took the tests and got the sheet of paper. The problem is, I fucked up and got my cert in the field of PE and those openings don't come up very often.

Not too bad so far right? Well I figured while I looked for a full-time teaching job, I should try to find something to hold me over and pay bills (had to quit my last job because it conflicted with my student teaching). I wound up eventually getting on as a director for an after-school program in a lower income area. Legally I can't go into too much detail (confidentiality and all that) but some of these kiddos are in not so ideal settings outside of school. I really try my best to do right by them though and make the day as fun as possible.

So far so good right? Well I'm in there yesterday and the principal comes in and asks to speak with me. Apparently I've had several complaints filed against me that I was totally unaware of. I'm a little less than a month into this job and this Monday I'll have to face complaints that I can't even prepare for. My supervisor says they have my back and when I asked my coworkers if I'd said or done anything out of line, they were just as confused as I was but it's kind of terrifying because idk what I'm being accused of.

Did I mention my truck died shortly after I started working there and I had to get a new car? Haven't even put a payment on it and I may already be forced to resign from this job which will of course put me into even more debt.

Anyways, a big part of me realizes that this is just part of being in the field I&#…
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Ian Worthinghall - Sat, 28 Apr 2018 13:55:58 EST ID:HJRNf/XO No.523717 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Teachers aren't allowed to say "shut up" to students now?

Don't resign over this, I'm pretty sure that's not a rule. And you didn't even say it!
>>
Jack Clayworth - Sat, 28 Apr 2018 23:53:22 EST ID:C+6NY20y No.523727 Ignore Report Quick Reply
a friend of mine is a teacher at a k-12 private charter school and all of the parents are such huge cocksucking faggot retards who froth at the mouth when their precious children are not given A's for work they don't even turn in, that over 3/4 of the teaching staff are resigning in may. this includes its entire math and science department lol. i have heard innumerable anecdotal stories similar to this where countless teachers suffer from burnout because of the ape-like parents abusing and bullying them. not to mention the shitty brat kids.
>>
Cyril Claystock - Mon, 30 Apr 2018 14:01:48 EST ID:HJRNf/XO No.523762 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>523727
have people not realized that that whole "build self esteem regardless of talent and effort" experiment didn't work? You can only praise kids when you know they tried hard.. otherwise you fuck them right up and they have to try to undo it as adults


I still can't believe you can't tell kids to shut up... kids need to shut up sometimes!
>>
Edward Clucklefield - Tue, 01 May 2018 18:02:56 EST ID:cRtpQnGk No.523790 Ignore Report Quick Reply
OP here, I'm surprised this thread is still going! It was only like 2 weeks ago but I feel like it was forever.

Yes, >>523660 I was 5000% sure it was better for my career long-term than to try to fight this. I have my teaching cert but I was working for an after school program in the school so I didn't have nearly the protections a contracted teacher would have had. Also it was my word against a contracted teacher that had been there a while. No witnesses or at least no reliable ones (kindergarteners are probably the easiest witnesses to lead possible).

But yeah I just got hired at a new job today. Pay is comparable to a starting teacher and it'll allow me to still look for a teaching job instead of taking bullshit ones like the one I just left. I get what y'all are saying but trying to fight out from under this with less than a month left in the school year would have been a tremendous waste of time, money, and energy. My own supervisor didn't believe me towards the end so it's kind of one of those situations where you have to cut your losses.

I can't stress enough though as to how much more money I'm about to make with less headaches. Sure teaching is the goal, but I wasn't really even teaching at this thing, more of a glorified babysitter tbh. I can study for additional certs and cherry pick a job that I actually want instead of just the first one that comes my way which is exactly what happened with this one.

>>523727
That's a whole other tangent I can go off on. That's starting to be the way public schools are heading: parents with unrealistic expectations both of their child and the teachers. Personally I think that better parenting would solve like 90% of societal problems BUT the system is gamed especially against lower income parents to have them working multiple jobs and keeping them away from their kids more hours of the day than they're together.
>>
Basil Hemmlehood - Tue, 01 May 2018 18:50:27 EST ID:C+6NY20y No.523795 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>523790

with each year that passes the movie Idiocracy becomes less funny and more terrifying


Run over by a B-1 Lancer, not sure what to do by Oliver Clabblegold - Sat, 28 Apr 2018 15:17:54 EST ID:7yJllkYV No.523719 Ignore Report Reply Quick Reply
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Posting from hospital right now, unsure about what my legal position is. I was parked next to an airbase after receiving a parcel full of my err..custom porn, made just for me and not sent over the internet to avoid scandal. Anyway, my guy dropped it off, and I decided I couldn't wait to get it open so I just opened it in the car, but I forgot to put the window up, so a gust of wind blew the pictures out the window and onto the grass. I got out to chase down the pictures, but I couldn't catch them and then some of them ended up on the runway just as a Lancer was landing. I thought I had time so I tried in vain to grab all of them as they kept blowing around, but then before I knew it the damn Lancer went over blew me off to the side and just missed running over my leg. Well, I was hit by the lancer, it didn't really go over me. It threw me right across the runway onto the grass, and it broke my leg rather than crush it.

Now I'm in a predicament, because the porn I like is now in the hands of the cops, and all the air force cops saw it and apparently were laughing about it. I don't know what I could be charged with yet though, I've just got up and the cops are coming to interview me later. So far it's just really embarrassing.
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Fanny Claddlebat - Sun, 29 Apr 2018 11:52:44 EST ID:LYivq+qk No.523735 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>523734

Problem is weighing my embarrassment against the potential monetary gain. I really don't want this in the papers, but then the idea of a million bucks is enticing. Thing is, I don't even know if I would win. I mean we're talking about the suing the air force here. I'm pretty sure they have a very good legal team.
>>
Martha Pullywater - Sun, 29 Apr 2018 20:25:28 EST ID:C+6NY20y No.523747 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>523734

>a servicemember trying to sue the military which owns them

doesnt work like that lol in the military you are property.
>>
Esther Clorringstock - Sun, 29 Apr 2018 20:52:41 EST ID:UGWKazs4 No.523749 Ignore Report Quick Reply
This is likely a troll thread.
I think OP wants to paint us a picture of him running around trying to grab up pictures of kiddie porn while he gets hit by a jet.
Not like mister CP courier would use a USB memory drive, clearly printing hard copies is much more convenient and less suspicious to said courier.
>>
Lydia Peddleford - Mon, 30 Apr 2018 05:34:23 EST ID:jkNJpdVH No.523753 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>523747

I didn't say I was in the military.
>>
Martin Snodshit - Mon, 30 Apr 2018 22:24:40 EST ID:/v/fnY4O No.523776 Ignore Report Quick Reply
fuck your degenerate ass and your broken ass leg


trying to fuck mom's friend by Eliza Sunnerchad - Sun, 29 Apr 2018 06:30:11 EST ID:26NpYx+j No.523730 Ignore Report Reply Quick Reply
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on a recent occasion when I visited my mom her friend was there, she looked really sexy and was giving me eyes the whole time, now shes added me on fb and i accepted but im bad at talking to girls in normal circumstances online let alone this situation but I want to fuck her so badly, any thoughts on how to initiate this would be apppreciated

thanks
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Nell Drummerpetch - Mon, 30 Apr 2018 14:10:01 EST ID:26NpYx+j No.523763 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>523748
tbh i wouldnt mind but i kind of wonder what the dynamic would be like if my mom found out, like i know with men if you fucked a guys daughter he wouldnt be your friend anymore and probably punch you but women have different attitudes, like I'm wondering now would they be hostile or would my mom be proud of me for bagging a cougar or what?
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John Gadgecocke - Mon, 30 Apr 2018 17:12:46 EST ID:66+ragAg No.523764 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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How old are you and how old is this milf?

I find most older women there's a threshold of when you're 25 is when they're into you, but that depends entirely on their age.

TBH i'd like to fuck a 50+ year old, but that's because i'm kind of fucked in the head. I've had sex with a 40 odd year old as a 26 year old. It was eh, ok I guess. I kind of bigged it up in my head a little, but the naughtiness of it all kind of faded once I did it.
>>
Graham Bredgemedging - Mon, 30 Apr 2018 20:33:03 EST ID:26NpYx+j No.523772 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>523764
im 23 but i had a 2 year opiate addiction that really aged my facial features and combined with recently starting weightlifting again I look a lot older than I am, maybe like 26-27
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Rebecca Drandleworth - Mon, 30 Apr 2018 20:44:55 EST ID:66+ragAg No.523773 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>523772
And the milf? What's her age. Hard to gauge anything here.

Have you ever experienced older women before?
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Graham Bredgemedging - Mon, 30 Apr 2018 21:04:24 EST ID:26NpYx+j No.523774 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>523773
late 40s early 50s judging from her looks
also quick update i just sent her a casual message saying hey was nice to see you hope you and the kids are okay sort of deal to open convo & nah not really fucked a girl who was like 22 when I was 18 but i dont think that really countd


Power vs freedom by Doris Goddleforth - Wed, 25 Apr 2018 01:15:08 EST ID:CThT4RmW No.523605 Ignore Report Reply Quick Reply
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>be me
>22 yrs old "white" male Arizona
>mom was overweight depserate nurse mid 20's, father was sheltered marine corps man mid 30's
>parents divorce when three, leaving me and 1 year old bro with mother, dad gets everyother weekend/holidays
>as a result of dual parentahip, blackpilled at 5 years old due to queationing why my fam is fucked up and dad tellin me that jeaus is like santa clause for adults
>"normal" until 5th grade, mom marries new on and off bf w kids gets new house in expensive burbs
>make friends w "rich" unsupervised stoner kids
>turn complete degenerate by freshman year of HS
>mom divorces again, lose new siblings, move was for nothing
> overweight dude weed lmao stoner band nerd aesthetic w a light dose of blue pill
>senior year of hs lose virginity to the band slut, cheated on, become redpilled af looking back on psych experiences and family history
>lose weight look good go to college for stem and business
>still dude weed lmao cuz MJ only thing that loves me
>drop out, become landscaper for 2 years trying to reenact hs if i actually looked good and was confident hang w the boys alot... enlist USAF cuz tired of losing at life, wreck brand new ninja 650r motorcycle in a parking lot. Have to wait 2 years to enlist due to surgery
>move out to the dirty T with best friend who already 2 years into a degree down there.
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Rebecca Chamblecherk - Sat, 28 Apr 2018 16:17:44 EST ID:/v/fnY4O No.523721 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>523670
Ya, uses a shitload of weird lingo and talks generally like a retard. Not really sure what his problem is besides that
>>
Jack Clayworth - Sat, 28 Apr 2018 23:25:33 EST ID:C+6NY20y No.523725 Ignore Report Quick Reply
wow op you really sound like a spoiled useless faggot. maybe work on changing that.
>>
Augustus Darthall - Sun, 29 Apr 2018 11:54:01 EST ID:Q2tPrg0p No.523736 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Go back to the future faggot.
>>
Sophie Nidgeseck - Mon, 30 Apr 2018 02:57:41 EST ID:42wGzjUi No.523752 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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>>523605
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VzoMzWkT0D0
>>
John Gadgecocke - Mon, 30 Apr 2018 17:28:55 EST ID:66+ragAg No.523766 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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You're squandering your youth by falling prey to internet tribalism.

I recommend a heroic dose of magic mushrooms to cleanse your ego, followed by reading some books, starting with Huxley.

But seriously, aint nobody taking you seriously talking like that


I've come to terms that I am a Sex Addict by Eliza Corryfuck - Thu, 26 Apr 2018 23:43:53 EST ID:KeCp8W3P No.523641 Ignore Report Reply Quick Reply
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This is the first time I've ever opened up about this, to give a little background I'm a freelance photographer, 22 yo Male.

I've always had lust for the female body, ever since I started watching porn. It's gotten to the point where I've paid my female friends to model for me to help with "projects" for my portfolio, often having them dress in lingerie, bikinis, other things of that nature. This has been going on for the past year or so and I've probably spent over $1000 in cash on these photoshoots. I've also paid an old friend of mine to jack me off in her dorm room, wait it gets worse.

I have a girlfriend of over a year who doesn't know about my addiction. I'm constantly texting other girls in my phone asking to hang out or at least get pictures out of them, most of the time I'm successful. I've tried no fap to try to curve my masturbation issue (I masturbate daily) but after about two weeks I gave in to one of the pictures I've taken of my friends.

I've been wanting to make this thread for quite a while now and Im asking for any suggestions on how to stop this, I want what's best for me financially, what's best for me and my relationship with my girlfriend, and what's best for my mental health, I just want to be healthy again
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Edward Bronnersidge - Fri, 27 Apr 2018 19:47:49 EST ID:3A/9rSkO No.523679 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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>>523666
>it's another armchair "EVERYTHING IS OXYTOCIN MAANN" creature fetishist who doesn't realize the brain is a complex organ with multiple different processes involved in addiction and the reinforcement thereof
Please make it stop mommy. I want the Wikipedia generation to stop.
>>
Matilda Greencocke - Sun, 29 Apr 2018 12:19:50 EST ID:dFnBHUUb No.523737 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>523679
youve said nothing other, you know nothing about neuroplasticity obviously
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Betsy Pinningshaw - Sun, 29 Apr 2018 12:32:40 EST ID:3A/9rSkO No.523738 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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>>523737
>like, neuroplasticity man!!! I WIKIPEDIA'D WHAT BDNF IS LOL LIVESTRONG TELLS ME I'M SPECIAL XD
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Esther Dremblechork - Sun, 29 Apr 2018 15:00:12 EST ID:fh5xuZgB No.523740 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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>>523737
uh oh look out boys, this guys spends his days browsing 420chan because he already made all the money he needs with his doctorate in neuroscience
>>
Henry Nicklefield - Sun, 29 Apr 2018 16:19:21 EST ID:knctO3Zh No.523741 Ignore Report Quick Reply
you guys are faggots


powerful sense of dread by Martin Clinnerfick - Wed, 25 Apr 2018 16:58:12 EST ID:lTlzyq9x No.523618 Ignore Report Reply Quick Reply
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I'm a highly sensitive, overly empathic tranny on girl pills that make my emotions even worse.
Now, this is really fucking annoying to live my life as.

For one, I get sucked into other peoples sadness as if it were my own; I will obsess over it, sometimes even to the point of almost feeling it as my own sadness tears included, and it's extremely stupid and embarassing, a s most people don't expect you to be like that when they tell you something sad that happened to them, and i just weird people out.

On the other hand, I'm also a very jealous person, and, considering i'm a tranny, this is really annoying as I get jealous of women constantly and get angry and frustrated over it. I get angry at myself for not trying enough. If I hear my neighbors having normal non-mentally ill people sex, I get frustrated too as I wish I didn't want to cut my dick off

I also have this habit of subconsciously copying other peoples interests, like favourite movies, series, how they talk, etc, weirding them out even more.

feels weird man
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Betsy Greenwater - Thu, 26 Apr 2018 15:09:24 EST ID:42wGzjUi No.523635 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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>Girl pills
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Wesley Puffinggold - Thu, 26 Apr 2018 18:30:04 EST ID:3A/9rSkO No.523637 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>For one, I get sucked into other peoples sadness as if it were my own; I will obsess over it, sometimes even to the point of almost feeling it as my own sadness tears included, and it's extremely stupid and embarassing,

This is just part of being a human being. Suffering is a constant. Be happier you haven't detuned, because that is a worse feeling by far.

>On the other hand, I'm also a very jealous person, and, considering i'm a tranny, this is really annoying as I get jealous of women constantly and get angry and frustrated over it. I get angry at myself for not trying enough. If I hear my neighbors having normal non-mentally ill people sex, I get frustrated too

This is also pretty normal.

>I also have this habit of subconsciously copying other peoples interests, like favourite movies, series, how they tal

If you didn't mention you were a tranny multiple times or included the 'i cut my dick off' part, I wouldn't have known. By and large these are all normalfag problems that everyone has to work out to their own degree, and I don't believe dick has dick to do with it if you feel me. There's nothing wrong with expressing empathy, or learning interests from other people, or feeling envious because you're lonely. You just need to learn some mindfulness, which, again, is pretty common as an issue. Do you have difficulties opening up to your therapist or something? I feel like these are issues that get covered early on in the treatment process.
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Eugene Billywurk - Thu, 26 Apr 2018 21:39:11 EST ID:m19TYEQf No.523640 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>523618
Who'd have thought that fucking with your hormones might make even more unstable.
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Polly Pablingshaw - Fri, 27 Apr 2018 14:30:00 EST ID:HyExONGu No.523671 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>523637
This guy says what I was thinking.

OP the thing to think about is not the extent of your problems but the extent of your ability to solve them. What would make you happier? Life is imperfect and you have to do what works best for you. Not what SHOULD be best but what IS best. What makes you happiest and long run, not just the short term easy way either.

Which of these problems can you solve? Which do you just need to learn to obsess over less? As Wesley said, mindfulness and learning to cope with normal emotions is what you need. I suspect the stress of your transitioning or whatever are making every day problems harder to cope with but you've got to sit and think not "But other people don't suffer these issues" because that doesn't help you, but what you can do now.
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Basil Dellychock - Sun, 29 Apr 2018 07:10:23 EST ID:2cRqUGEL No.523731 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>523618
Are you in your first year or so of transition? If so yeah it'll all balance out eventually.

Emotions are normal. TBH I had that before transition and titty skittles only made it increase, but basic empathy goes a long way into forming friendships and not being a brick wall weirdo once you get to grips with it.

Jealousy is a natural part of the human condition. How do you think cis girls feel whenever they see someone gorgeous walk down the street or see pictures of airbrushed models in every magazine and advert selling beauty products? The jealousy of cis girls will for the most part pass. Not saying it'll be gone, but eh, you slowly learn to make do with what you look like even if you're not happy with it.

Copying people's interests is fairly normal, moreso if you're on the autism spectrum I think. It's clear you wanna connect with people but don't quite understand how. As long as you also have your own hobbies and interests then it's how you convey the copied movements. It's perfectly normal for close friends to share so much in mannerisms and habits, but I guess just for people you know it might feel a bit too intimate at first, so just try to tone it down a little.

It's easier said than done, but quit overthinking and try to develop yourself how YOU want to be seen, instead of hoping to rely on other's perceptions on how they see you.


I fucked up halp pls by Lydia Greenworth - Fri, 27 Apr 2018 05:54:56 EST ID:wV/Xzi2U No.523649 Ignore Report Reply Quick Reply
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>February I had a hooker over we did drugs and fucked
>She robbed my bank card and took out over $1000
>I pressed charges but left out the drugs and hooker part
>Two months pass, cops keep calling me every week but I'm too scared to answer the phone. Last time I answered about two weeks ago they said they were viewing some camera footage of hooker using my card.
>I get high a week ago and message hooker basically saying let's call it a truce, can we bang because I'm too high
>Cops continue trying to reach me but whenever I call back the investigating officer is out of the office or had to take a more high priority case

How fucked am I legally? I'm leaving the country for two weeks in a few days then I'm moving out of where I live to another city for a month then I have a permanent flight booked out of my home country permanently. What should I do now? Lawyer up? Seems too late for that now. Should I change my phone number? IDK what to do guys. The bank gave me my money back but I'm sketching out hard because I know the police are gonna find the hooker arrest them if they haven't already and the hooker is gonna try and nuke me as well. I've been too scared to leave my house lately everytime I hear a siren I think fuck this is it they've come to throw me in jail.
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Hedda Bradgehot - Sat, 28 Apr 2018 09:33:56 EST ID:JWUlcM+k No.523705 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>523704
Then what exactly are you worried about?
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Wesley Pebblefon - Sat, 28 Apr 2018 09:47:18 EST ID:wV/Xzi2U No.523706 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>523705
Police find the hooker who robbed me. Hooker goes to jail for breaking probation. Gets pissed rats out the prostitution and drugs aspect or makes up other shit to get me dragged down too.
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Hedda Bradgehot - Sat, 28 Apr 2018 09:55:45 EST ID:JWUlcM+k No.523707 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>523706
"I don't know what the hell she's talking about, officer"

Case closed, take 'em away boys.
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Hedda Bradgehot - Sat, 28 Apr 2018 10:12:14 EST ID:JWUlcM+k No.523708 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>523706
Also where is the picture from your OP from?
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Aranciata Rossa - Sat, 28 Apr 2018 11:26:38 EST ID:yDKihQN5 No.523709 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>523708

misc episode of lockup/lockdown/inside penitentiary etc

usual shit


Ya se fue y lo enterré, y eso era todo. by Reuben Micklekere - Sun, 22 Apr 2018 06:39:03 EST ID:tiBuSQx/ No.523579 Ignore Report Reply Quick Reply
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I finally got back a letter my grandpa wrote to me, in which he links his philosophy career, me being transsexual, and his imminent death. He was one of the few people who was kind to me consistently in my abusive family, and my grandparents instantly accepted me, much unlike everyone else. There was a lot of stuff I missed when I was younger (it's a long letter) but that's even more valuable to me now, reading at nearly 28 instead of nearly 18.

It's painful and I miss him. Just wanted to say that to someone. That's all.

If anyone wants to say anything about anyone dead that they loved then they should do it.
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Matilda Perrykit - Wed, 25 Apr 2018 05:41:40 EST ID:qkJ71Chg No.523608 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>523604
I'm 26. She looks really young lol. I cried over letting her go. When was the last time any of you cried?
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Nicholas Geblingstone - Wed, 25 Apr 2018 12:14:22 EST ID:hjdKGFK5 No.523611 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>523608
sucks but it's ok to cry over people that's gone
i cried about two months ago when my old dog died
it's healthy
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Matilda Modgeridge - Wed, 25 Apr 2018 15:31:49 EST ID:7EQPr2Xz No.523615 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>523608
I cried after my a friend of mine was found dead in his yard. We weren’t that close and I wasn’t too emotionally effected until I randomly thought about him and realized I’d never see him again
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Hannah Gizzlechack - Thu, 26 Apr 2018 15:00:48 EST ID:yUhAjzvV No.523634 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>523608
I'm also 26. Can't remember, been several years. Not to sound edgelord, but I've pretty much got no real ability to feel feelings anymore. Pretty sure it's the result of two concussions. I guess to be more precise, I'm mostly incapable of feeling grief for having lost things that once meant a lot to me; then again, I'm not really capable of forming emotional attachments to things now either.

Truly, the way I'd try and look at things in a situation of loss is to recognize how beautiful it is that you're capable of feeling this way about somebody. That is to say, somebody else or an animal or whatever was capable of producing this kind of terrible, god awful, wretched emotional reaction out of you. Reflect on what it means that you for a time must've had in order for the loss to carry such weight.

Knowing that for life, or indeed, anything to occur at all, there must be an end for every beginning. For there to be any one thing at all and for us to experience it, it must not only be a pair, but a package of three. Things begin, they are, and then they end. Perhaps any one of these could exist on their own, but they would be without point, meaning, or value when not considered in relation with one another. Taken out of context, even every "slice" of a moment during your life is just as dead or might as well be as non-existent as before you came to be or as it will (imo) likely be once you are gone. What matters are chunks, and during your chunk, you've known, felt, and understood love. Pain is love, and love pain, with the only real difference being in their matter of degree and the perspective you view it from.
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Ebenezer Tootman - Fri, 27 Apr 2018 01:40:28 EST ID:fh5xuZgB No.523643 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>523608
Bruh she's 59 and on her way to dying alone because she's an insufferable cunt that nobody could ever commit to. You're not responsible to be the beta that takes her shit until she dies. Nobody is. She dug her grave.

If you're upset because you miss her that's understandable, but you sure as hell have no reason to feel bad.


I have literally no social skills by Nicholas Cruffingstig - Thu, 15 Mar 2018 16:59:23 EST ID:oK5Vp0/i No.522820 Ignore Report Reply Quick Reply
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I am 21yrs old. I have no social skills. I've become increasingly isolated. I work at a restaurant and have worked in restaurants since 15. I've always been awkward but in the last few years either my social skills have gotten worse or maybe I've just grown too old for my poor social ability to be overlooked.
I had friends through most of high school (I went to 4 different schools)but I always switched from group to group. I did have a few close groups but they all fell apart. II used LSD and many other psychedelics very often, almost always alone. I would often spend months alone without going out, followed by brief periods of intense social activity. I didn't enjoy socializing exactly, but I felt capable of doing it. Towards my senior year I began drinking heavily and using amphetamines to help socialize, I wouldn't even go to class without killing a bottle first, and I'd keep drinking all day.
I went to collge for a semester and managed okay there as well, I spent the first few weeks without making any friends but I eventually had a close group of 3 friends and I'd spent all my time with them. Other than them, I pretty much talked to no one. During that time i became extremely dependent on Xanax and ultimately got suspended due to not controlling my drug use.
I was homeless for a while and lived in some really bad circumstances, I'm only just recovering now. I'm in a community college now and have a place to stay, but my social skills have taken a permanent dive. At work customers seem vexed and uncomfortable from just talking to me for a few seconds. I alienate myself from complete strangers within a few moments. I don't make facial expressions and every moment of socializing feels completely conscious, not natural at all. When I make eye contact with people they get really uncomfortable and their eyes start watering, so I completely avoid eye contact. When I smile it's either held too long or too short. I creep people out. My coworkers hate me, my manager tolerates me only because he's aware of my situation and feels bad for me.
Outside of work, I spend all my time alone. I mostly sit in my room studying math all day or playing guitar, or reading books.…
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Archie Clenkinnere - Fri, 16 Mar 2018 10:48:02 EST ID:N/uJd9MT No.522832 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>When I make eye contact with people they get really uncomfortable and their eyes start watering, so I completely avoid eye contact. When I smile it's either held too long or too short. I creep people out. My coworkers hate me, my manager tolerates me only because he's aware of my situation and feels bad for me.

Any chance at least some of this is in your head? I mean unless you have some hideous deformity or are horrifically ugly other people don't often get repulsed by simple eye contact or an occasional awkward smile. It also doesn't seem to help that you basing all of your current social skills on such a small and potentially shitty pool of people like people you're forced to work with. And I agree with what the above poster said that I don't think drugs are the answer here. Sitting in your room taking drugs and thinking of how things can get better is a whole lot easier than actually putting yourself out there and making things better for yourself.
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Cyril Pallybat - Fri, 16 Mar 2018 11:59:24 EST ID:CxCtCvYn No.522834 Ignore Report Quick Reply
OP at 21 you're still pretty much a kid, you've got years left to work on this so don't write yourself off.

My advice is to work on yourself more, and i call it work because it will take effort. The standard advice applies, you should start working out, start finding new places to go and interact with like minded people and say yes to more social situations you find yourself invited to.

You're asking about using drugs to "cure" you; if you're introverted this might actually work. It kind of worked for me, I abused stimulants for a while and became much more extroverted when sober. I guess the logic was "If i can act so friendly and outgoing when under the influence and everyone likes me, then I can go ahead and start being more outgoing when sober".

However this plan could go horribly wrong, results are not guaranteed and i had other positive things going on in my life at that time which may have also helped me. The decision to do this is up to you.



Slight side note which may not apply to you, meaningful human interactions kind of require you to share a part of yourself and if you're got nothing good going on on the inside your interactions / connections with others will be poor.
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Betsy Crenderman - Tue, 24 Apr 2018 21:34:19 EST ID:e/4ZLHmJ No.523603 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>522820
Kratom is the best thing I've used for being a social retard. It makes you sociable and empathetic (plus gives you a boost in energy). That said, it could be a crutch or it could open you up to experiences and situations that lead you to actually improving your social skills.
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Caroline Pocklenare - Wed, 25 Apr 2018 08:36:07 EST ID:4get43Ac No.523610 Ignore Report Quick Reply
I agree about people not usually being so repoulsed within the first 3 seconds of meeting you, unless - OP, how's your grooming routine? Do you smell okay? Comb your hair? Take care of your skin? You're not one of those autists that never shaves their upper lip bumfluff and walks around mouth breathing with the world's greasiest hair? OP I care about you so I just have to make sure. Social anxiety only gets better with practice, and even some of the most charming extravert's get it
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Fucking Guzzlefudge - Wed, 25 Apr 2018 12:49:29 EST ID:q7NC3IuN No.523613 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>523603
Given OP's record it will be a crutch. Be realistic.

Other people have covered a lot of good points. Drugs haven't worked for OP yet and he's tried just about everything else. He's young enough that he can still turn this shit around and should try chemical shortcuts later.


I often find massive myself having massive arguments with myself about being gay by Simon Brookhood - Sun, 15 Apr 2018 08:41:34 EST ID:EIEtNyio No.523465 Ignore Report Reply Quick Reply
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Don't know about it. Right?
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Nicholas Murdford - Sat, 21 Apr 2018 03:20:34 EST ID:wJWwXGAC No.523567 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>523465
If you have to argue with yourself about your sexuality, that means you're confused. If a chick with a strapon will do, then you're not gay.
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Hedda Durryworth - Sat, 21 Apr 2018 08:50:51 EST ID:yUhAjzvV No.523569 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>523549
I agree with what you said, but you almost made it sound as if you've already decided OP is in fact gay since his experience reminds you of your own. I'm not saying you have already decided that, just that what you wrote gives off a vibe that that's the perspective you're coming from. Also, I realize somebody can be in denial about some aspect of themselves and being gay isn't an exception, but at the same time having random and/or intrusive undesirable thoughts that are perceived to be homosexual or meaning one must actually be homosexual simply because they're having them just makes things even more confusing and simply isn't the case.

Experiences like those don't mean you're gay (of course, they don't exclude the possibility either obviously lol). The problem with having intrusive thoughts or feeling like you're really emotionally close or attached to a male friend is that, for better or worse, emotional intimacy (especially with another guy) beyond sexual relations with a woman is foreign to most guys because quite honestly the rest of the world doesn't give a fuck about you and doesn't want to hear you complain all the time and talk about your feelings or deal with somebody they feel reacts to things in an overly sensitive manner. If it weren't ingrained in us to treat women much, much differently than we do other men (mostly better, but that's a pretty big generalization to make I guess) from childhood, and women weren't the major biological barrier for successful reproduction they are, chances are they'd be treated just like men too. When they control whether or not you have any sex at all and you grew up knowing how fucked you'd be with the rest of your family and the whole of society for not treating a woman properly, you just play the game the best way you can--meaning women can afford to be emotionally intimate and complain about their problems, because it just so happens that nature chose them to be the sex with highest demand and lowest supply (of gametes). In other words, men have to be productive and useful to have value, and women that are capable of reproducing are simply inherently valuable becau…
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Sophie Clozzlelut - Sat, 21 Apr 2018 13:05:34 EST ID:q7NC3IuN No.523571 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>523549
Some of that stuff is a reaction to other people's reactions, real, imagined and historic. Which is to say it's sort of tradition. And if you figure out that your sexuality isn't the assumed default that you're just raised as if that's what you got, that's got to be harder than just being straight and everyone assumes you're straight and then the opposite sex do it for you and you never have to think twice. So not only have you done what straight guys like I have never done, but you've done what a lot of gay guys don't do too. Instead they just assume hey I've been told I'm straight, "I just to work hard to get an erection for women and overcome satan giving me boners for 19 (or 17 in some cases) year old boys and be the republican senator for this state so I can fight the people who failed where I did". Not realising they're the failures that straight people don't deal with that etc. Maybe I'm just over stating it because I've not done it and don't know how easy it is but a lot of people fail hard even as they fuck men behind their wife's back.

fuck I'm a brit and there was a big scandal when an MP was found fucking a man behind his wife's back and she was devastated. Except now she's got a girlfriend so I guess they were in a marriage of convenience to help deny their shit and no one complained about the lack of sex as a result.

So I mean if you want to have a big gay celebration you earned it. But if you don't then you've also earned the the right to just get on with doing who or what you want without making a fuss.

But also that some people just become obsessed with the idea of a sexuality because of the stigma, media attention or whatever and it doesn't mean shit. Maybe OP is surrounded by homophobes but spends ages with people acting like it's normal and talking about it constantly and he can't get it off his mind. Maybe OP is struggling with women and hasn't been in that life fire situation. Maybe porn doesn't work too well it's hard to feel that connection to someone going through the motions on a screen and/or fucking someone who clearly is not you
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Nicholas Sockleputch - Mon, 23 Apr 2018 22:35:44 EST ID:xWjEIMCw No.523592 Ignore Report Quick Reply
you know the saying:
If in doubt, you're gay
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Nell Crebblemet - Tue, 24 Apr 2018 13:19:52 EST ID:8MWQz9ep No.523597 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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Reality is manifested gayness that is pretending to be straight and is too ashamed to admit itself to itself. Embrace it. Faggotry is woven into the fabric of reality on every level. Are you not lucky for coincidentally possessing a means for becoming closer to it?


potential relationship problems? by Hannah Drushhood - Sat, 21 Apr 2018 12:28:01 EST ID:yjOXNvLQ No.523570 Ignore Report Reply Quick Reply
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My girlfriend was raised to be very religious and she can be very close minded or ignorant about certain things which I understand as she lived a sheltered life because of her parents who emotionally abused her by making her feel bad about her appearance and weight when she was really young.

The other day we made plans and at the last minute said she forgot that she had to go to a meeting for an organization she is in. She made an assumption about what I would be doing all day after she canceled our plans last minute and it did upset me but I never fully told her why it did.

It was one of those "you're gonna do this all day" kind of comments. Am I overreacting or do you think I should tell her how it made me feel?
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Hannah Drublingridge - Sat, 21 Apr 2018 14:31:45 EST ID:dVp8iHEG No.523572 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>523570
Tell da trooth. Tell da trooth.
https://youtu.be/v79i9szAR6g
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Thomas Dottingson - Sun, 22 Apr 2018 08:57:42 EST ID:i6MKK9HT No.523581 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>523570
something is missing from this post, OP.
I can't put my finger on it. But in this form, for me at least, it is impossible to comprehend what you're actually trying to say.
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Cornelius Sankincocke - Sun, 22 Apr 2018 12:41:38 EST ID:q7NC3IuN No.523582 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>523581
Things missing
>whether he would have spent all day
>if she disapproves of thing
>possibly what thing is
I mean I'd have guessed play video games or smoke weed and OP could have offered to ensure he was free, especially if she knew when she'd be free. But if he did that and she couldn't commit and had already screwed their plans then she should probably realise she's being selfish. I somehow doubt this is the real issue.
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George Snodgold - Sun, 22 Apr 2018 17:37:10 EST ID:WRXPb8Vm No.523584 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>523582
Pretty much what you just said is what she insinuated I'd be doing. It was more that she canceled our previous plans a d then immediately jumped to oh you're gonna smoke and play video games all day.
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Fucking Conkinridge - Mon, 23 Apr 2018 12:55:00 EST ID:q7NC3IuN No.523588 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>523584
Well given how shady you've been about it, if you're this iffy about in person then of course she's going to think it. I think it too. I don't see a problem with it but I would be annoyed if you got angry that I was right about your plans. The presumption hurts but you've yet to say "oh no that wasn't what would happen". The way you are acting it is entirely reasonable to assume that was what would happen because if it wasn't true you'd say "oh no I was going to tidy around the flat a little and maybe go for a stroll, but yeah when that's done why not?" or "I was going to go go bench press that book you love and read 100KG to be extra sexy for you" or whatever the truth is.

It doesn't matter if the big reveal is that were going to execute a genuine plan to save the world and create infinite free clean safe energy for all or whatever, because you've been so evasive about the simple truth that you probably annoy your girlfriend too. It won't suddenly make you right, because you're annoyed about the presumption and if you are even half as shady as this about things in person then yes, the most likely cause for such behavior is that you're up to no good. And it's reasonable for her to presume. And if she's right about it then lets get to the real question.

The real question is maturity. Are either or both of you mature enough for this shit? She has a chip on her shoulder about weed because she's been programmed to hate it, I'm reading between the lines but it's a story as old as time. You are aware of this and you try to tolerate it because she's making an effort for you. The question is can the two of you compromise enough to be happy. The truth is you had better plans you'd rather have done and she fucked up and you shouldn't have to justify a backup, unless you genuinely can salvage some other plans around what else she's already committed to. She should be mature enough to say "yeah I fucked up and these are his backups, he's not choosing weed over me" and you should be mature enough not to be a bitch when she's right and get annoyed that she can'…
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