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required by Esther Clayshaw - Tue, 24 Jan 2017 01:52:15 EST ID:OC+eiKg6 No.512673 Ignore Report Reply Quick Reply
File: 1485240735275.jpg -(114525B / 111.84KB, 702x844) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size. 114525
My girlfriend can't find a job after over a year of searching, her visa is about to run out and she will be forced to leave the country and go home; She is incredibly smart and beautiful but she can't find a sponsor. She made it her mission to make me feel responsible and she is a little right considering we've been dating for years. I don't want to marry her and I've been biding my time for months because we can't seem to break up and leave each other alone. I thought she would have gone back by now but she's still here and every day is suffering for the both of us. She is continually anxious and on the verge of breaking down and going back to her home country is the last thing she wants to do. Nothing can make her happy and every day it's the same sad story, every week a new rejection letter from a company that can't afford to hire her. She wants my help but I'm powerless except for asking her to marry me. She keeps asking for reasons why I don't and then blames me for all the suffering she has gone through. I feel so stuck and the only thing I can do is wait for all this shit to go away so I can be myself again, she naturally feels abandoned because she is being forced to give up everything about the last 4+ years of her life.

It's hard for me to complain because of all the shit she has to go through. She's been rejected hundreds of times, she has to leave/sell most of her stuff and clothes, she has to leave her cat behind, she has to quit her internship, she has to leave her long term relationship. She will be making less than a livable wage. I feel so selfish and heartless I've had to tell her no countless times and find every reason to justify it. I hate it.

Every day feels like hell and I just want it to stop, I feel like such a piece of shit.
>>
Polly Banderpat - Tue, 24 Jan 2017 07:51:40 EST ID:35+jbzpY No.512680 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Just go down to the courthouse and get yourself a marriage certificate. It's not a big deal. If y'all separate then so be it. However, you you both choose to be together afterward and want a legit wedding with all the bells and whistles, you can have one of those "vow renewal ceremonies" which act just th3 same as a wedding and is just as lavish.
>>
Esther Clayshaw - Tue, 24 Jan 2017 14:15:46 EST ID:OC+eiKg6 No.512689 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>512678
noted

>>512680
You're right but it's actually not that simple, my state requires we both have valid US identification that proves we live in the state which we do not, we would have to go to Vegas or some shit.

Because she already has a valid visa the process is typically a little simpler, we would file an I-130, I-485, maybe a work authorization form. These are not cheap and cost roughly $1300+ just to file.

Once they process the form we will be asked to do an interview where I will be asked to sign an affidavit of support. I will have to prove that my income is >20k a year, I will have to report to the immigration office every time we move, I will have to guarantee that she does not require government financial assistance up until she becomes a US citizen (5-6 years). If we divorce I am still obligated to uphold the affidavit. If in the next 6 years we decide to divorce her citizenship status will be put at risk although if she has a greencard we can still prove the love was real.

The biggest issue right now is that I simply don't have the money, we will probably consult an immigration lawyer just to double check the paperwork. If I get a new job in the next two months I might reconsider this entire thing.


insomnia by Maya - Tue, 17 Jan 2017 01:34:19 EST ID:tCICQRX4 No.512499 Ignore Report Reply Quick Reply
File: 1484634859361.jpg -(46396B / 45.31KB, 500x403) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size. 46396
I have really bad insomnia! Is there anything I can take to knock myself out? Tonight I already took 50mg meclizine, 50mg unisom, and 10mg ambien. I also took a dropper full of ashwandagha. I'm also on lamictal, latuda, baclofen, and lyrica. (I have fibromyalgia and bipolar type 1.) I wouldn't mind being up most of the night so much if I didn't feel aimless all the time. I'd like to work on music or do the dishes but it's hard to focus or stand up. I've been spending a lot of time in bed. All I could handle today was a couple hours worth of errands...

I bought sleep tea blend at a local herb shop. I also bought an energy mix because I'm tired ALL the time. I also got licorice root and kava. I tried too many herbs at once and something interacted bad with something else. I was sicker than usual for a few days....so now I am afraid to try the sleep tea again. It has a variety of herbs in it though. It was probably the licorice root and kava that interacted, a friend said. Plus I mixed California poppy with the sleep blend. It might be okay...

How do you guys get good rest? I can't take passionflower or valerian btw.
>>
Thomas Gondlekat - Mon, 23 Jan 2017 13:17:49 EST ID:WCiWyIpM No.512654 Ignore Report Quick Reply
no no no
you're doing it all wrong
first, grab a hold of your butt
i'm being serious by the way
grab a hold of your butt and just
listen i need you to listen to me this will sound strange but i need to you TRUST me ok ok??? yes so trust me pleas
sok grab a hold there of your butto and
KEEP READING THIS I SWEAR THIS WILL FIX YOUR PROBLEM JUST TRUST ME OP IDGAF IF YOU POST A PIC OF YOUR UNICORN SKELLIE HEART BLUE THING WHAT THE FUCK EVER JUST TRUST ME
TRUST ME THAT THIS WILL CURE YOUR PROBLEMS AND PROBABLY TAKE AWAY YOUR DEPRESSION AND ISOLATION AND CURE YOUR AIDS AND GIVE YOU SUPERPOWERS AND TWO STOMACHS BUT YOU HAVE
TO
TRUST ME PLEASE ITS FOR YOUR OWN GOOD ok ok so you trust me and youll do exactly what i say next GOOD good you trust me good
grab a ahold there of your butto and wait for a
TRUST ME
wait for a big ole
TRUST
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>>
Cyril Goffingson - Mon, 23 Jan 2017 15:33:00 EST ID:xorMz/zL No.512659 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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Well, this may be too obvious but, have you talked about this with your Doctor? What did they say?
>>
Cyril Foshbanks - Mon, 23 Jan 2017 22:48:48 EST ID:WCiWyIpM No.512669 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>512659
a doctor will tell you the same thing
grab a hold of your butt and take a big whiff of your farts


I hate my life and my relationships, can't go on any longer by Simple Dids - Sun, 22 Jan 2017 03:36:50 EST ID:+J+WMFPt No.512620 Ignore Report Reply Quick Reply
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Sorry for my bad english, I will try to write as comprehensive as possible.

Its pretty straight forward for me, until its not.

I fought hard to "make" something out of the hellhole of my life I had
(parents died, brothers and sisters in a psychic ward),
stopped doing drugs after they nearly ruined my brain and threw me into depressions,
had suicidal thoughts nearly every day (but never the guts to pull it through) horriffic nightmares nearly every night, lack of sleep ...
Couldn't find a job and made mostly some slave jobs back then.

Now I finished my education and got a certificate two years ago and I have relatively relaxed work now (compared to the other jobs I did!)
Met a girl after maybe 5 failed relationshits, and we are together since 5 years now.
She was... well relatively fat when me met to be honest.
after maybe two years in our relationship she started to work out, doing sports in the early mornings and lost really much of weight!
We wanted to marry next year, but...
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>>
Alice Bullybanks - Sun, 22 Jan 2017 22:10:21 EST ID:lmLP6M2/ No.512641 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>512620
all you have to do is have physical discipline and you get a great life.. what do you want someone to tell you? youre lazy.
>>
Alphatae Meberine - Mon, 23 Jan 2017 14:44:39 EST ID:p4SA1+8o No.512658 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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>>512641
what a moron.
"Physical discipline" after a day of hard psychological and physical work my ass.

>>512620
Congratulations on what you HAVE accomplished! From where you were to where you are now is a huge accomplishment! I don't care if you have back slided a little, you are amazing! Losing weight is hard. I was fighting that myself. Keep at it one day at a time.
>>
Barnaby Dreblingstone - Mon, 23 Jan 2017 15:56:10 EST ID:hhQhcuad No.512660 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>512620
Double down on your efforts to eat well and exercise. I know you lack energy but it'll get easier and well.. sometimes you just have to go force yourself to the gym. Diet is the most important part of losing weight but exercise will help ensure you keep a bit of muscle and accelerate the process.

Anyway if you pull this off the effort you made for your other half will be appreciated. I know this is a problem but it's also an opportunity. You've beaten much bigger problems. Beating yourself up for every mistake is not how you got here and not how you improved things. You grabbed on and pushed life until until it moved for you. Run at least a 500 calorie deficit. If you can do 1000 then do it. You'll be back in noticeably fitter within 6 weeks and back in shape in a few months.

I know it sucks that she's more concerned by looks than you. But you can't control how you feel, only how you react to them. Hopefully she's giving you a chance to do something by telling you before she's had enough not finding you attractive. Sex is something that she should be into and she can't help if if she needs to be physically attracted to the person she wants to have sex with, most people are the same. The thing is, you both accepted each other as you were. She made an effort to improve herself for you and you have gotten less attractive. Some people have this mentality that they stay in shape and once they "have" someone they let themselves go. She was fat but she improved herself despite you.

All that said there's a chance it's too late. But regardless do this. Get in shape. If she didn't tell you this was a problem until it was too late that's not a fuckup. Things go wrong. I have posted this twice today. Sometimes you do everything right given what you knew but things go wrong. At the end of the day OP you've achieved a lot and can keep achieving a lot. Life is never going to be easy for you but if you do the best you can for you, given what is within your reach and knowledge you can recover from the worst case and end up even further ahead eventually. Even in the absolute worst case scenario for this situation you have overcome worse…
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Can't make a decision because of fear and anxiety. by Eugene Sollyfatch - Sun, 22 Jan 2017 01:21:33 EST ID:N4C7HfN0 No.512614 Ignore Report Reply Quick Reply
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This is going to be long winded, and I greatly appreciate any sort of perspective or advice received. My situation isn't a common one, and I'm praying someone here can relate. It all started a few years ago, when I was diagnosed with a skin condition called Rosacea. It's an inflammatory skin condition that causes my face to flush and burn, much like the picture. However, mine is highly related to anxiety, and I have developed a panic disorder around it. I can go from looking normal, and then in the next minute be red as hell and having a panic attack. I've withdrawn socially because of how tired I am trying to stop it from occurring. If I have plans for the day, I make sure to get up just an hour before, as my face is less likely to flush early in the day.

Well anyways, because of this condition I can't see myself doing anything. It's caused so much damage to me mentally. I've had girlfriends break up with me because they couldn't deal with the lifestyle I built around managing my rosacea. I can only stand to be in a job for a few months at a time before I can't handle the mounting anxiety of making sure I hide this condition from my coworkers. Luckily, I can find physical labor in the summers that lets me be mostly alone, and I do Mechanical Turk in the school year to make money. College is a nightmare as well. I have a presentation months from now and I'm having panic attacks thinking about it. Long, busy days stress me out, because the longer I'm awake the more likely I will get a flush reaction, almost to the point of inevitability anymore.

I can't make a decision about my life. The military is out of the question because of psychiatric care I received after I had a mental breakdown a few months after first developing the condition. I'm in school now, but I show up and duck out as quick as possible. I've thought of work-from-home careers, but those are a pipe dream. I have to start living my life despite this, and I want to take the first steps in becoming a functioning adult. I have to break out of this mental barrier that says I can't be a part of society. I have no idea what I want to do though. I'm thinking at this point, picking s…
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>>
Darrington Runkle - Sun, 22 Jan 2017 10:01:54 EST ID:HrwTH8ua No.512624 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>512623
Did you have the flushing brought on by temperature changes as well?
>>
Hamilton Sillerfield - Sun, 22 Jan 2017 10:39:45 EST ID:zbKXnohS No.512626 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>512623
quit shilling your fad diet pseudoscience expert

>hurrr durr it werks 4 me so it'll werk 4 every1
>>
John Guffingteck - Mon, 23 Jan 2017 07:41:25 EST ID:WysDkaNi No.512650 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>512626
what exactly am I shilling?
Dudes suffering from an auto-immune disease, he has to stop eating things that set off his immune system.. educate yourself
It will only improve his life, try it before you knock it, you have your whole life ahead of you to eat cheesy poofs, stop eating them for six months and see what happens, Jesus

My rosacea reacted to everything, heat, spicy foods, alcohol, random flushing throughout the day, embarassment, it wasnt as bad as yours sounds, but it doesnt happen anymore since i stopped eating crap and trying to heal my gut,
look up leaky gut syndrome and see if that makes sense
>>
Cornelius Sacklewill - Mon, 23 Jan 2017 19:18:35 EST ID:zbKXnohS No.512666 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>512650
>i'm not shilling anything officer

nb
>>
Ian Mozzleway - Tue, 24 Jan 2017 05:46:13 EST ID:WysDkaNi No.512676 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>512666
youll never get anywhere with that attitude.


How do I get over abandonment issues? by Walter Mecklehood - Sun, 22 Jan 2017 20:33:18 EST ID:NS+wEE+H No.512635 Ignore Report Reply Quick Reply
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mid 20s male here. How do I get over my abandonment issues?

I've dated a lot of girls, but I'm always quick to ghost them over the smallest things- sometimes they'll just say something regarding other guys I don't like, and I won't say a word or cause drama, but I'll just never ever contact them again after that instant.

I also have codependency issues, the girls I've been most attracted to have had some self-esteem/hating men/previously touched by daddy etc. issue going on (i normally find this out a couple months into seeing them). How do i get over these as well?

my end goal is a relationship with someone I'm mentally, emotionally and physically attracted to.
>>
Graham Bublingnock - Mon, 23 Jan 2017 06:19:00 EST ID:SYzOHGu9 No.512646 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Bump
>>
Graham Bublingnock - Mon, 23 Jan 2017 06:19:01 EST ID:SYzOHGu9 No.512647 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Bump
>>
William Brummlefoot - Mon, 23 Jan 2017 06:24:16 EST ID:dd8B6ogu No.512648 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Time. As you continue on with your life and reflect upon these things they'll heal over time.
That's if you've got the intellect to do it.
>>
Phineas Sinderwell - Mon, 23 Jan 2017 16:09:29 EST ID:oCL9TxZ4 No.512661 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>512635
Watch Evangelion
>>
Cornelius Sacklewill - Tue, 24 Jan 2017 17:47:30 EST ID:zbKXnohS No.512694 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>my end goal is a relationship with someone I'm mentally, emotionally and physically attracted to.

so does everyone, but they don't get it in the end.

most of the time it's either a choice between put up with someone who will tolerate you but you aren't all that attracted to or suicide


I want to better myself by OP - Thu, 12 Jan 2017 20:48:01 EST ID:HrwTH8ua No.512372 Ignore Report Reply Quick Reply
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Hello all,

I would like to use this thread as a way to hold myself accountable for my daily life. I want to better myself, get rid of bad habits and be productive instead of wasting away and going nowhere.

I don't have anyone to talk to about my situation, so that's why I'm posting on here. Hopefully I'll feel more determined to be productive if I tell people on here about it. Maybe I'll even get a conversation going on how to change your life.

Anyway I doubt this will work and if this isn't allowed then by all means delete it. Good luck to anyone who's in the same situation. You're all welcome to use this thread for the same reasons as me.
19 posts and 1 images omitted. Click Reply to view.
>>
Alice Blackdock - Thu, 19 Jan 2017 12:29:48 EST ID:mu8hf6Xw No.512566 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>512521
Well I'm glad that you're keeping this all in perspective. I'm curious what sort of goals you settle on for the long term. As is you've got some good perspective so keep at it. Even though its small you're building. And as you build up that foundation you'll be able to step towards bigger and better things.

I'm keeping an eye on how this is going. And the whole main goal of bettering yourself is solid. Now you're getting near the end of that first week. So it's gonna be time to settle into those big goals soon. Anyways, keep updating I'm going to keep checking on this.
>>
Edward Sungershaw - Sat, 21 Jan 2017 01:31:56 EST ID:dHz96Ylp No.512597 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>512372
I'll chip in on the cold shower thing. Really sharpens you up, activates a drowning reflex that shunts more oxygen to the brain. You get the same thing by sticking your face in a sink full of ice water.
Plus it's a minor test of willpower that can harden you up for life's real challenges if you've let your spirit get flabby.
>>
Walter Dellylock - Sat, 21 Jan 2017 21:48:46 EST ID:Auf9w1/f No.512613 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Hey OP i started using trello (a type of project manager) to sort my problems out and set short term/long term goals. It really helps when you have something like that staring you in the face.

I also really got into web design for awhile and I completely stopped playing video games. Try and do at least one productive thing per day and soon everything will fall into place.
>>
OP - Sun, 22 Jan 2017 02:39:21 EST ID:HrwTH8ua No.512617 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>512566
Thanks again for the support. Building a foundation is a key element of lasting success, I think. And that's what I'm trying to achieve in these first weeks, because I think it will be important for when I go through a tough time. If I have a good foundation, hopefully I will be able to fall back to that if I lapse, instead of back to square one.

I realize I don't have any really big goals at the moment. My main "bigger" goals are:
  • Eliminating bad habits (procrastination, bad posture, bad foods, etc.) i.e. being mentally strong to stop myself doing things that aren't good for me
  • Creating and upholding good habits (educating myself, being fitter, having more willpower etc) Generally being more productive towards the things I want

Are there any "big" goals I should aim for?

>>512597
Very true and very well put as well.

>>512613
Thanks for the suggestion, but I've found in the past that setting specific endgoals and deadlines doesn't really work for me. For instance, before I go to bed, I'll write down 5 things I must do the next day. Usually I'll end up doing 2 and be satisfied with it. Or I'll try one, fail, and disregard the other 4. It's strange, it's like my brain automatically starts to look for reasons NOT to complete the tasks.
>>
Hugh Summerbidge - Sun, 22 Jan 2017 23:08:51 EST ID:mu8hf6Xw No.512643 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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>>512617
I like the positive perspective dude. I can't give you any big goals to be shooting for. Its like I don't know where you want to go with your life. But you should set some bigger goals based on your intrests. That I can't quite gauge. So all I ask is that you try and keep step forward and keep us updated. It's good to see you still working at self improvement. I'm here and I'll be glad to hear you out through this process my man.


Am I Depressed? by Edwin Brezzleshaw - Fri, 13 Jan 2017 13:52:39 EST ID:PYzoENVk No.512395 Ignore Report Reply Quick Reply
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So, I've had people in the past tell me I'm depressed. Both my father and internet anons have told me this. 25 year old male, dropped out of college 4 1/2 years ago, currently work in security. Diagnosed autism makes me too "slow" for everything else.

Before I start, I'm not diagnosed or anything, but I took a couple of online tests that really spoke to me, even if they're not valid. Here are all the things that appealed to me on some level.

>Feel life is not worth living (NOT SUICIDAL, just don't see the point in putting in the effort. If you're going to be miserable no matter what, then why bother)
>Get stressed very easily
>Get depressed at the turn of each season, summer into fall and winter into spring (feel like I wasted time)
>Learning disorder as child and adult
>Have trouble remembering or concentrating
>Lost interest in things I used to enjoy (drawing)
>Live in Northern Hemisphere
>Feel like life is going nowhere
>Have difficulty making decisions
>Feel fatigued
>Feel a need to always change or move around, though I don't have enough money to do so
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Cornelius Nabblenot - Sat, 14 Jan 2017 16:44:01 EST ID:zbKXnohS No.512417 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>512411
fuck off retard

why is everyone here trying to exploit depressives by shilling them on their bullshit fucking fads or disgusting fetishes or disgusting politics? are you that desperate for numbers?
>>
Cyril Chemblemutch - Sun, 22 Jan 2017 12:37:25 EST ID:PYzoENVk No.512628 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Anything else? Yeah, I should go to therapy, but I want to talk to other anons on this website who have depression; how do you guys deal with it?

Figure my thread would fall into oblivion while the relationship drama ones get all the hits.
>>
Martin Dillerford - Sun, 22 Jan 2017 12:44:23 EST ID:5JYKa3yb No.512629 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>512628
I don't deal with it. I'm actively trying, having been in and out of therapy since I was fifteen, but basically I'm still depressed as fuck.
>>
Graham Crongernotch - Sun, 22 Jan 2017 14:19:25 EST ID:DKOp/R+t No.512630 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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>>512628
>how do you guys deal with it?
Lots of introspection and meditation. Not necessarily real meditation, just being somewhere quiet and thinking. I used to go for walks in the forest, personally. For me, dealing with my depression (which I still very much have but I feel like I'm over the hump and am in an infinitely better place) wasn't about doing anything. It was just a series of epiphanies where things sort fell into place.

Apart from that the only other thing I can suggest is that you see a doctor. My body can't produce enough of some chemical, dopamine or serotonin or whatever, to keep up with how much it uses. All the meditation and philosophizing in the world isn't gonna do much good if you physically can't help but feel like shit.
>>
Polly Horringfidge - Sun, 22 Jan 2017 21:28:37 EST ID:lC4u5xZY No.512638 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>512411
>>512397
You know, for a while I really bought into shit like this. I would start eating kale and feel amazing, but then you build that tolerance and it doesn't affect you anymore. It seems like no matter what I do, no matter how much grass-fed butter i slap into my low-acidity coffee, depression is just gonna creep back eventually.

I feel like I know the cause, too. Yeah, my serotonin and dopamine are probably out of whack, but that's just a symptom of my problem. My big problem is life is pointless and it eats me alive. I envy the people around me because I wish the only thing i cared about was getting that raise or fucking that girl or collecting 'em all, it seems so straightforward.


Bro code by David Blatherlock - Fri, 16 Dec 2016 18:49:49 EST ID:fnYcXQp9 No.511678 Ignore Report Reply Quick Reply
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First time I had to resort to advice like this. There's no one I can talk to about this.

Long story short, one of my oldest and best friends is in a relationship with a girl. We meet up a lot and something's blossoming between me and her. I am really into her and I can tell she's into me too. She keeps commenting on how she wishes her boyfriend was more like me, looked more like me, acted more like me, made her laugh as much as I do, etc. She's offered to come round to my apartment this Valentine's Day because she's in town for a college project and she wants to spend the night in my bed. My bro knows about this as well and seems okay with it, but I doubt I would be. I assume he knows I would never do anything like this to him.

Anyway, the thing is, I've been dry for 6 fucking years. No sex. Nothing. This girl is amazing, just my type, looks gorgeous, cute as fuck, and just seeing her makes me happy inside in a way I haven't felt in years.
What the fuck do I do? I can't fuck around with my boy's girl, you know? That's the bro code.
Then again, if she's more into me than she's into him, maybe we should have a long talk when she comes over on Valentine's Day.
But if she offers to break up with him for me, how can I ever trust her to stay with me?
I'm just really fucking confused right now. I've never felt happier because the thought of this girl just makes me feel so happy and good. On the other hand, I've known this guy for 8 years and I could never look him in the eye if I did shit behind his back. And the fact that I'm so happy about knowing this girl makes me sick to my stomach as well, because he's my bro and deserves his happiness.

I don't even know what my question is, I'd just like some advice from ANYONE on this problem.
If necessary I can elaborate more on the story, but this is the gist of it.
Thanks a lot in advance.
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Polly Cabbleseck - Wed, 11 Jan 2017 18:09:37 EST ID:ZpUEPaZa No.512337 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>512314
Just keep avoiding her one on one hang out situations and when in large groups of friends just ignore her and give her the cold shoulder.

I'll give you bonus points if you talk aloud about how hot other women are while in front of her.
>>
Caroline Tillingwell - Thu, 12 Jan 2017 22:21:54 EST ID:PfKbqA4c No.512380 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Bro invited me to come round soon. Just me and him in a restaurant.
Should I bring it up? It's the first time I'll be seeing him in months without her present.
>>
Ian Snodspear - Fri, 13 Jan 2017 00:11:42 EST ID:7koO+yAg No.512382 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>512380

Yes. Talk about it.
>>
Martin Dinderlure - Fri, 13 Jan 2017 05:06:30 EST ID:plr4U7Rg No.512386 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>512380
I would just not pursue it. The logic of her leaving one to be with another is solid and will repeat itself. The problem is that all women do this and if you always act logically you will be forever a spider monkey's butt. I am okay with this but it sounds like maybe you aren't. You could always wait until they break up; it doesn't sound like it's going too well. But that doesn't mean you should ignore chances with other women like you are probably doing right now for your bro's girl... I bet she loves having you on the hook.
>>
Zac - Sun, 22 Jan 2017 18:20:04 EST ID:io971C/7 No.512632 Ignore Report Quick Reply
As Sebadoh once said "im willing to wait my turn to be with you". I f its meant to be it will happen one day. But YOUR friend is so much more important than trying to make something happen between you and the girl. So ya go on with your life and maybe even communicate with your friend how you feel and that you dont wish to hurt him. it wil help you alot if you can get that off your chest maybe even make things clearer for you.


Dealing with autophobia by Wesley Nucklechit - Wed, 18 Jan 2017 09:02:41 EST ID:dwP2IOJ3 No.512530 Ignore Report Reply Quick Reply
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I can't really do relationships. I'm constantly on edge because I think the people closest to me are always eight seconds away from leaving and most of the time I end up destroying it myself. I either get too clingy and chase them off by trying to hold onto them or decide to cut ties before they can (which is great because nine times out of ten it's all in my head).

It's gotten to the point that I've basically given up on other people altogether. What the fuck am I supposed to do here?
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Beatrice Clablingstock - Fri, 20 Jan 2017 16:51:07 EST ID:z2/FukLH No.512578 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>512577
No kidding. Let's get a drink, Thomas.
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Simon Dartford - Fri, 20 Jan 2017 17:12:51 EST ID:zbKXnohS No.512579 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>512577
people don't resent "being tied down" if anything they desire it more than just about anything else on this earth

they just resent the assumption that you should be the one to tie them down, because humans are superficial and selfish, attracted to partners they really shouldn't be with in the first place and disparaging toward the partners that would make them happy. They're fed bullshit memes by this poisonous American world culture that tells them it's okay to treat humans like tampax, throwing them out after wiping them on your bloody cunt. Disposable, without a second regard. They take after "role models" who tell them it's okay to shit on people without their consent because it looks cool in a Youtube video.

Or they get rejected by all of the above and turn toward terrorism or extremism. So many problems, nobody wants to try and fix them. They want to bury their heads in the sand and pretend all of that youth unemployment, suicide rate depression rate divorce rates... will vanish tomorrow.

It won't.
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Phyllis Fonningbury - Sat, 21 Jan 2017 13:17:48 EST ID:SvrL9OfC No.512606 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>512530
This probably has more to do with how you view yourself than anything else. I mean, just think about it for a second. Why are you always so afraid somebody is on the verge of leaving you? It's not actually because any of their behavior, you just read into what they do too much. Chances are you probably have a poor self-image, probably a low sense of self-worth, and low self-esteem too. The reason you always think they're on the verge of leaving is because you think they're getting sick of your shit, that your little quirks and intracies at their core, that you can't help but have (not talking about the fact you wind up getting clingy, we'll get to that) are some how bad enough to drive them away.

If that's the case, you probably wonder how it's possible you've managed to get close to this person or even any people at all to begin with, because you know deep down that you'd probably hate you or hate being around you in their position. You may also feel you're a burden on them a lot of the time but don't mean to be (whether or not that's actually true). This isn't because your personality is actually annoying or bad in anyway, but because whether you realize it or not, you don't like who you are as a person. Sometimes it's not easy to realize you feel that way about yourself, because you're coming at it from the position of seeing you from a perspective that's supposed to be theirs, but really you're just giving yourself an honest impression of what you think of yourself without sugar coating it.

The part about you getting clingy is how you deal with the insecurities born from your own poor self image and possibly even low self-worth. Because you lack control in dealing with your anxiety and worries doubled with the feeling of losing the person (again, losing control of your situation) you're close to, you try and take control back by clinging to them. You know it's a bad strategy, but it's the only one you're used to, meaning all other methods of dealing with the situation are totally out of your comfort zone. On top of that, it confirms your beliefs about how they view you as a person... the whole tim…
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Albert Clacklecocke - Sat, 21 Jan 2017 14:30:11 EST ID:IpccH+D5 No.512610 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>512579

Sure makes a lot more sense than the fundamental nature of human relationships changing because now we're in "this day and age"

People are more alone than ever and their relationships are shallow and dysfunctional, that means something is wrong, not that that's what human relationships are now

People think they just coast through life not taking anything seriously and treating love like it's an afterthought or a toy but they're in for a rude awakening one way or another
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Graham Crongernotch - Sun, 22 Jan 2017 10:27:28 EST ID:DKOp/R+t No.512625 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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>>512606
Fuck. I think you're totally right. I'm kinda at a loss for words right now, you just gave me a whole lot to think about. Thanks man.

Thanks to all you guys as well, I got some really great advice and tons of shit to mull over. If nothing else I feel like I got a better understanding of what makes me tick and how to work with that to get what I want out of life instead of letting it determine what I can and can't do.


School and living by John Publingson - Mon, 16 Jan 2017 05:32:10 EST ID:vKvaev27 No.512458 Ignore Report Reply Quick Reply
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I'm currently attending community college in a small town of like ~80,000. I live with a roommate whose meh for the past year and a half. He switched colleges and goes to a university about 45 mins away, which he drives to.

I'm considering transferring to a different university thats 30 minutes away to enter this intense psych program this fall in a big city. If I do this, i'm not driving a half hour away to the city, i'm moving there. This is in the opposite direction of my roommates school so i'm assuming we'd no longer be roommates.

I'm 24 and didnt start school until 2016. Pretty much all of my friends are either in stable living conditions at this point (mainly serious relationships) or I wouldnt live with (into drugs and partying, not able to hold a job down or be serious, etc)

I guess I could swing living in a studio by myself but i'd be completely fucking broke all the time. I dont really know if I want to live with my roommate anymore, hes a decent guy but I dont think that living in the city would work for us, the school hes going to would be over an hour away. I'm also kind of sick of living with him.

So people who have done it, whats living completely on your own like? I've had like 10 roommates since i've been 18, I feel like I could be set to the point to live on my own (and kinda have to) by this fall

>tl;dr, potentially gonna be living alone for the first time, whats it like and is it hard?
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Wesley Fanwell - Wed, 18 Jan 2017 23:34:32 EST ID:EOQZ3M/6 No.512549 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>512546
>don't have anybody way younger than you 18-22

that's not way younger than 24. But 18-22 year old guys will bring cute barely legal girls to OP's house.and they'll bring friends which OP can sleep with
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!GOACID/XyA - Thu, 19 Jan 2017 01:16:15 EST ID:Y9KGRvdc No.512552 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>512549

OP is at college. Those are literally all over campus and they're dumb/easy as shit, no need to have a chick room mate for that.
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Angus Cracklewell - Sat, 21 Jan 2017 05:06:19 EST ID:zbKXnohS No.512599 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>512528
>Go become a kook and practice pseudoscience peddling to retards who don't know any better and can't do basic wikipedia research!

i despite people like you and what you do to society
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Hugh Hullymad - Sat, 21 Jan 2017 16:40:44 EST ID:GQC3jbDG No.512611 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>512546
>don't ever live with a female! #mgtow
You're a lot of shitty things GOACID, but I never knew you were a misogynist
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Molly Bunkinnot - Sat, 21 Jan 2017 17:14:03 EST ID:ao70+iXj No.512612 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>512611
Lol this is why I stopped coming here. You literally cannot say anything about a woman on this board without someone calling you a misognyst


My mind during relationships by Walter Bardcocke - Fri, 20 Jan 2017 21:02:44 EST ID:XNHppQwf No.512594 Ignore Report Reply Quick Reply
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I am very happy and secure with my mind and the choices I make. Even when the decisions I make are terrible and the calls I make incorrect, I still feel like they come from a very honest and sincere "me", deep down. There's a little guy in my brain and he's 100% me and he makes my decisions and I'm comfortable with that.

Every time I am in a relationship I look back on the decisions I've made and the calls I took and realize that it wasn't really me at all. I feel shame and regret for ever having thinking that the thoughts I had came from the same "me" that is so confident and secure. I'll give 2 quick examples

1) After I got dumped I thought my gf was cheating on me
I know the /qq/ line will obviously be "she was bro" but ultimately I know she wasn't. Straight after she dumped me though I had it locked into my head that she had. Realizing that I was so wrong about this was a pretty embarrassing experience. How could i, someone so "secure" within their own head suddenly fuck up that badly and make such a terrible un-me call?

2)Convinced myself my friends girlfriend was prepared to dump him and get with me.
I am embarrassed even typing this shit out and this is something I even mentioned on /qq/ once in a "friends gf likes me" thread...what ever happened to that btw? She was coming up for valentines day, anyway off topic but basically I thought my friends girlfriend was both interested in me, despite there not being much evidence for this other than the fact I REALLY liked her, and I mean, there were signs but nothing that indicated anything like she was going to break up with her boyfriend and get with me, because that would have just been madness on her end.

But a few weeks ago the second example there was a perfectly reasonable thing to think. Now I look at it and I can't believe I even had those thoughts. I just have this horrible feeling of anguish and embarrassment for ever allowing myself to think such retarded things. I've only just now identified this feeling as something that prevents me from really trying to get a girlfriend. Worrying that I have such retarded thoughts in these situations makes…
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Angus Fammleburk - Fri, 20 Jan 2017 21:11:31 EST ID:xthSn9DL No.512595 Ignore Report Quick Reply
I fucking feel you, so much right now man.

Except the paranoia about the gf, is true and it fucking sucks shit. She's the best gf I could ask for, other than she probably cheated on me.
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Angus Segglemid - Sat, 21 Jan 2017 09:26:42 EST ID:RtZhxG5x No.512603 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Don't be so hard on yourself, you're growing, it would be much worse to stay of completely the same stagnant, keep growing, keep improving yourself and giving the effort needed to take that step outside yourself and look at things for real. You have a good day too
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Phyllis Fonningbury - Sat, 21 Jan 2017 12:41:25 EST ID:SvrL9OfC No.512604 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>512594
>Every time I am in a relationship I look back on the decisions I've made and the calls I took and realize that it wasn't really me at all.
Wasn't it though? Is the you that makes decisions in a relationship really somebody else just because the motivations, pressure, and desires you have in a relationship change your decision making and thought process? I know you don't literally mean that it isn't you, but describing it in those terms is part of what's making you reject and regard those times in your life wish such shame and regret. There's a difference between feeling like you should feel bad because of how you acted and actually feeling bad about the way you act. One is based on some social moral aspect that is designed to alter your behavior to be more socially acceptable, and the other is actually feeling you did something wrong and wanting to be better. It sounds like you're experiencing the former by what you've described.

The reason this distinction is important is because the former leads to repression where the latter doesn't. An easy to tell which one is the case is whether you feel shame (former) or if you simply feel some regret (latter). If you come from an attitude of shame, you aren't going to make much headway in getting better, at least not without causing additional negative effects somewhere else in your behavior or some other aspect in life. Basically, if you shame your way out of acting the way you deem wrong, it'll cause some neurosis to develop that will hinder your interactions with others in some way.

I would try going about this realizing that you're coming from a very different emotional position when you interact with your significant other in a relationship. There's nothing wrong with wanting them to be faithful and worrying that they may not be, for example. It's alright to feel that way. What's wrong is acting on the feeling, either by distrusting them without any sufficient reason to/treating them poorly because of it, or by feeling like you're wrong to have felt that they were cheating in the first place. It's perfectly natural to have a fear like that, even when they haven't…
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FUCKING F U R R I E S by Molly Pepperchit - Wed, 18 Jan 2017 17:21:18 EST ID:tcI02+gD No.512542 Ignore Report Reply Quick Reply
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I have personally mapped out a upcoming furry-con so I can try to commit a terrorist attack.


>is there something wrong with my hate for furries
>pic unrelated
>it's my cat.
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Matilda Sublingspear - Wed, 18 Jan 2017 22:57:15 EST ID:UjNuOR6B No.512548 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>512542
Site moderators are required to forward posts like these to a major three-letter agency or the site will face legal trouble. You're gonna get vanned mate.
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Alice Blackdock - Thu, 19 Jan 2017 05:12:42 EST ID:mu8hf6Xw No.512556 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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>>512548
Hopefully he's behind a proxy or something. I don't think he really meant it honestly. I mean a guy with a cat like that wouldn't do something like that... would he?
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Sidney Chindlefield - Thu, 19 Jan 2017 06:04:55 EST ID:zbKXnohS No.512558 Ignore Report Quick Reply
why the fuck would you ever post it to a *chan you fucking retard. you could have done good work on god's earth.
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Wesley Murdfield - Sat, 21 Jan 2017 06:48:38 EST ID:xX1OY0Hl No.512600 Ignore Report Quick Reply
well idk m8 just tell us why you hate them?
is it becuase they funcuck you? youre jealous of the pointless absurd fun they have?
or ?
youre so broken that not even they will accept you????

how about you learn more healthy ways to deal with your problems bro
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Hamilton Sillerfield - Sun, 22 Jan 2017 10:41:56 EST ID:zbKXnohS No.512627 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>512600
>ever wanting to be accepted by furries

hahah oh wow the posts I read on this board sometimes nb


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