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Save money and Stay Off the Internet. by Basil Wisslehall - Fri, 08 Dec 2017 18:36:29 EST ID:OCwtUy6R No.520561 Ignore Report Reply Quick Reply
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Is the internet for recreational and social purposes a waste of time? I think so, there is so much time I waste to cancel out any productive time I have. Its really becoming a problem and I think Im just going to quit. Im also working but its honestly not enough and Im just kind of spinning my wheels.

Dunno who I am + How to act by Cornelius Gimblestock - Thu, 30 Nov 2017 23:19:04 EST ID:DSLNfNuc No.520401 Ignore Report Reply Quick Reply
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I believe I'm averagely smart (i.e. I'm okay) but I realized early on that playing dumb and aloof was a lot easier for me to get liked by other people. People found me funny. I liked that. I don't know if it was healthy for my confidence though.

I'm 29 now and have no idea who I am nor how to adapt. I don't want to switch between roles constantly either. I have to think about my self-esteem.

I also feel unable to grow up into adult-mode so that's probably why it's easier for me to put on a mask and hide my insecurities and act (probably) quite childishly.

I'm gonna stop writing because exposing how mentally fucked up I really am would take too much time. I got bipolarity, social anxiety disorder, etc.

Thanks for reading. I'm kinda lost and have no sense of self, really. Truly no sense of self. I don't know who I am. Feelsbad.

Any tips?
Ernest Bedgefure - Fri, 01 Dec 2017 00:57:46 EST ID:0PJ7z1R+ No.520404 Ignore Report Quick Reply

I dunno, you didn't give too much info so it's hard to pick a place to start.

I used to dumb myself down to fit in too. Used to drink/smoke weed to party hard with people I wouldn't normally hang out with. It's a blast, don't get me wrong. But probably not healthy.

29 too by the way. Maybe you should spend some time finding yourself. Like, try to figure out what your values are, where you want to be in life, who you want to be emotionally/physically. Like really pin it down before you figure out where your path should lead.

Me time and such. Set aside a day at least to reflect on it.
Graham Tillingshaw - Fri, 01 Dec 2017 02:53:11 EST ID:F6BBbLXR No.520405 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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You're Jackie Chan.

I'm your father.

Graham Tillingshaw - Fri, 01 Dec 2017 14:58:25 EST ID:F6BBbLXR No.520416 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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Eliza Hicklelock - Sat, 02 Dec 2017 13:25:53 EST ID:di1zMxxB No.520431 Ignore Report Quick Reply
There's a comic i love called the invisibles and there's a scene i remember that is very relevant to OPs problem. I'll try to paraphrase.

A character is teaching a class and he has a nice chair next to him. He asks the class to describe the chair. You can talk about the craftsmanship, the wood, the tree it once was, you can argue if its truly a different form now that it's been carved from a tree into a chair, you can talk about it in the historical context of other chairs in human history or you can talk about artistically and try and describe the "soul" of the chair. Then the character breaks the chair and continues to ask if the chair is still there or in the past and the intricate differences now that its been broken.

Etc etc, then he asks where in all this description is the essential chair? Try to describe all the chair is and you can list millions of things, we cant even come close to really, truly describing a chair or truly knowing it and yet we say with certainty that you can ever know something as incredibly complicated as a person like ourselves.

We cant even know a chair but we dare to suggest its even remotely possible to know ourselves.
Try to describe all that you are and then understand the logical falliacy in that very sentence.
The point is you cant ever know yourself. We're as complicated as a literal universe and if that's not enough we change, constantly from moment to moment. No one knows who they are and that's ok. True sense of self or other is impossible. There's no "self" that can be described or grasped that doesn't shift or becomes something else. This is what true Buddhists and people like Schopenhauer mean where they say there is no "self" and people often misunderstand it as the obviously untrue idea that individuals dont exist.
Albert Fuddlewill - Fri, 08 Dec 2017 10:08:09 EST ID:hQScIyLB No.520558 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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>breakthrough on dmt
>come back to earth
>notice what you feel
>that's you OP

most likely it's gonna be some lame shit like peace or serenity, but I'm cool with that because It's so filling. If you just stop thinking for a sec there is always some underlying feeling like this, just realize that that is very potent stuff and that even the tip of the iceberg is enough to satisfy you fully (it's the real deal the You afterall) so whenever something is less than the way you;d like it just sip on the sweet nectar of you.

How to decrease your sexdrive? by Caroline Drirryfuck - Sun, 26 Nov 2017 13:04:56 EST ID:irYaPPec No.520283 Ignore Report Reply Quick Reply
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I'm in a 3 year relationship now. When we first started, we had sex a lot. Morning and evening at least.

Then this turned into daily sex, then once every 2 days, now sometimes we skip 2 days, even 3..

Not because of me though, if it were up to me we'd wake up by fucking & fuck before sleeping. But her sexdrive just went down a lot over the years ... Apparently this is pretty normal in relationships, but mine is just as high as ever.

But I don't want to force her to be more sexual than she feels like being. so I'm basically looking for way to kill my own libido. Does anyone have any tips?

So far all I can find is that eating tofu instead of meat helps and that exercising either increases, or decreases sexual urges. It seems like there are 100's of way to increase libido, but when you want to decrease it nobody seems to have answers..
7 posts omitted. Click Reply to view.
Angus Dartbanks - Sat, 02 Dec 2017 12:01:34 EST ID:5mr627pH No.520428 Ignore Report Quick Reply
You have to masturbate in secret? that sucks. me and bf might have less sex than you two but at least we tell each other when we're going to masturbate and invite each other to join in. Why would I be hurt that he looks at videos of pretty girls? I mean, unless those girls are looking at a picture of me and laughing at how ugly I am.. but that's very niche, I'm not sure he can afford that
Eliza Hicklelock - Sat, 02 Dec 2017 12:57:59 EST ID:di1zMxxB No.520429 Ignore Report Quick Reply
As with any mental thing, trying to brute force a feeling one way or the other doesn't work and usually has the opposite effect.

Just except that in a relationship your sex drives are never going to line up properly. It'll probably taper off on its own naturally and fluctuate randomly, just leave it alone and jerk off when you have to.

Nothing wrong with this, people have incredibly unrealistic expectations about libido where they think something is wrong if they aren't having attentive passionate sex every single day.
Dildo Senpai - Sat, 02 Dec 2017 17:56:34 EST ID:qEzlyloc No.520436 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Maybe she's tired from you, and thinking about other mens?
Dildo Senpai - Sat, 02 Dec 2017 18:06:00 EST ID:qEzlyloc No.520437 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Try to bring something new to your sexual fantasy, BDSM, Anal sex, DP with dildo(fucking her pussy while putting Dildo inside of her anus), footjob, boobjob, acting like a dirty plumber, jerking your dick with her hair, doing a treesome with a tranny....
Albert Fuddlewill - Fri, 08 Dec 2017 10:02:18 EST ID:hQScIyLB No.520557 Ignore Report Quick Reply
fasting if you can handle the avalanche of emotions that comes with the package.

placeholder for interesting subject by Esther Moblingspear - Mon, 04 Dec 2017 23:36:05 EST ID:0clEr60T No.520489 Ignore Report Reply Quick Reply
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>male, near 30yo
>kissless virgin
>borderline hermit throughout my entire life, never learned how to "hit on women"
>never been into social networks

I've tried dating sites very briefly before giving up due to the fact that there are hardly any women from my country online, and the ones that I find are lesbians or looking for a millionaire with a 40 inch dick.

Think I should try Twitter or something? with a pseudonym or my actual info? how honest should I be about being a lonely weirdo?
13 posts and 2 images omitted. Click Reply to view.
Nicholas Buzzbury - Wed, 06 Dec 2017 17:45:38 EST ID:je5zTw44 No.520529 Ignore Report Quick Reply
He's wrong about being a loner but you're probably not lacking in social skills. Carrying off a negative angry person without everyone avoiding you is not something a lot of people can ever hope to do. You risk being some combination of joyless, whiny or just edgy for the sake of it.

The right friends will mean you meet more people and you will meet on better terms because if their friend considers you a friend most of the time that's a good sign. People will be more receptive to you in general. The best bet is to befriend girls, though you need enough emotional maturity to not handle rejection or disinterest and genuinely be friends. You should have that by 30 and if not then you definitely need to socialise more.

But yeah, of course it's not necessary to have friends. It'll probably help OP and even if it doesn't no one ever asks "what if I made my life so much better for nothing?" with any sincerity.
Matilda Brookwater - Wed, 06 Dec 2017 20:45:46 EST ID:0clEr60T No.520532 Ignore Report Quick Reply
I actually like that argument and it gives me something to work with; even if I can't be social and all that shit, at least I can try to learn it or fake it, plus, it's not directly learning to pick up women or whatever but rather it's just learning a skill that might indirectly lead to women, which I find much less daunting.

Thank you Emma, I'll work on being more social... whatever that implies...
Phoebe Nickledock - Wed, 06 Dec 2017 20:53:39 EST ID:MZPRwEGN No.520533 Ignore Report Quick Reply
A hooker. Just spring for something in the 300- 400 dollar range idk what happened to you last time but finding reputable pros isn't hard and you will get laid. Your first time is Bullshit for most people. I was 24 and the girl I banged was a devil wshipper who did cocaine nothing to brag about but i have zero regrets. The stigma around pros is bullshit and if i had the money i would of just done it
Ebenezer Tootstone - Wed, 06 Dec 2017 23:08:57 EST ID:o9AXpHQ8 No.520539 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>Tinder is for straight up "let's meet so I can stick my dick in your holes", right?
Not necessarily. It's more for finding people to go on dates with, which often ends up in a cheeky root, depending on what the person's looking for.

Doesn't hurt to try it out, as long as you're clear about your intentions. Just don't present yourself as a massive autist and you'll be fine. Put up some nice photos, and provide some brief information about yourself.
Esther Henderchine - Thu, 07 Dec 2017 21:04:08 EST ID:0clEr60T No.520554 Ignore Report Quick Reply

I'll give it a shot once I've gained some confidence.

fuck all this bullshit by Walter Hecklewutch - Thu, 07 Dec 2017 01:06:37 EST ID:c7k1hDPc No.520542 Ignore Report Reply Quick Reply
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I don't have a personality or know who I am. I'm very quiet and just fulfill peoples expections when prodded to speak or respond. I was a NEET for almost a year and have just started working again in the past few months. I'm not respexted as an adult despite supporting myself. My self esteem is extremely low. I was bullied in school as a kid and hated both myself and the bullies in a very real, concrete way. Now my feelings are wishy-washy Nothing about what I do is experessive, and since losing interest in vidya and writing when I was 16, I have no hobbies. I feel invisible, doomed to wander a seemingly endless cloud of thick, uncomfortable unease. This feeling is so hard to describe. I have no one I can talk to.
3 posts and 2 images omitted. Click Reply to view.
Doris Summlenare - Thu, 07 Dec 2017 14:44:22 EST ID:hRBYIF6G No.520550 Ignore Report Quick Reply
"I don't do anything interesting"
"Isn't that interesting guys??????!?!?!?!?"

Find something that interests you preferably outside your comfort zone.
Albert Crinningfoot - Thu, 07 Dec 2017 16:03:24 EST ID:pXUKLru+ No.520551 Ignore Report Quick Reply
I was there once. You might just have really bad depression like I did. Or have a burst of empathy and self awareness that comes with it.

It sucks but you can get out of it. I don't know how I did though.
Jarvis Henningmig - Thu, 07 Dec 2017 16:18:09 EST ID:Vw0mYPnD No.520552 Ignore Report Quick Reply
sounds like someone needs to do a little rectal exploring
Augustus Soffingfoot - Thu, 07 Dec 2017 20:52:37 EST ID:kAEKpfyQ No.520553 Ignore Report Quick Reply
I bet his problem is that he's not bored enough.

OP, stop using anything that requires an electronic screen. No internet, no video games, no TV. Internet is by far the most important of these to abstain from as the constant seeking behavior is hell on your reward pathways. Do this for at least three weeks. You will get so bored that you will start to do something and the lack of super stimulating content will reset your brain and make it so you actually enjoy doing it. It will take a while for this to happen, dopamine receptors upregulate pretty quickly, but it still takes a week or two before you'll start to notice any improvement and maybe a month tops to fully get back to normal.
Phineas Fuckingham - Thu, 07 Dec 2017 23:17:11 EST ID:lC2OSmvU No.520555 Ignore Report Quick Reply
You sound like me.

You're like water. You can fill any shape that will hold you. Or really any role designated by the people around you. Take advantage if this and throw yourself into new environments. Join a class doing something entirely different and stick at it. Therapy will be a boon too if you can get a psychologist that you can trust. If you have decent healthcare in your country, you can get that subsidized as you have a mental illness most likely.

Also work on your appearance. The more attractive you are the more positively you will be received. The new attention will spin you out and you'll lose more of your self identity, but then you'll find it again, tempered in time.

As for the past, work it. Slide out the drawers of your memory and reorganize them until they aren't painful to the touch. Use the wisdom of your years. Your abusers were children, at the whims of their temperament and circumstance. Same as you. There is no closure or justice, as these people no longer exist in the same configuration as when they hurt you. It's a sad sad thought to first grasp, as all the anger of your childhood will turn against yourself, but that will fade too.

You are not hollow. You're just a man, scattered and afraid. Like everyone else.

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