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Ghosts by Polly Sellydock - Thu, 12 Oct 2017 05:10:29 EST ID:USUZpST+ No.519327 Ignore Report Reply Quick Reply
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Why do they never leave
Why did nobody warn me about them
Never get a moment of peace a list of ghosts as long as my arm always lurking there to remind me. They never leave I hate them
So many ghosts in the back of my head waiting for the opportunity
How do you let them go I don't know what muscles to relax to stop holding on that's not how brains work
Please they're like ticks that never let me relax into something new
How do you make yourself clean again
John Smallbanks - Thu, 12 Oct 2017 06:44:11 EST ID:JI9kO00V No.519332 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Are you using ghosts literally, or metaphorically?
Polly Sellydock - Thu, 12 Oct 2017 07:37:03 EST ID:USUZpST+ No.519334 Ignore Report Quick Reply
What's the difference? The latter if you're picky

nobody speaks my fuckin language, man by dimples - Thu, 12 Oct 2017 04:16:18 EST ID:DlJv0rWW No.519323 Ignore Report Reply Quick Reply
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how do you earn your own trust?

i don't trust anyone, particularly myself.

it's all delusions and manipulation.

also, butts.
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MY STOMACH FEELS PUKEY - Thu, 12 Oct 2017 04:59:07 EST ID:DlJv0rWW No.519326 Ignore Report Quick Reply
yeah, probalby

no you are

please help me

no go away
Frederick Nenderdane - Thu, 12 Oct 2017 06:10:37 EST ID:GHzh7vt/ No.519328 Ignore Report Quick Reply
That's understandable. I was really just kind of curious.

I've been thinking about delusion recently. You ever heard that theory that depressed people are seeing the world as it is? And happy people delude themselves? I think there's something to that. There's a degree of deluding yourself which is necessary in order to be mentally healthy. Sort of like how psychiatric disorders are (very, very generally) malignant exaggerations or deficits of normal psychological phenomenon. A schizophrenic is an example of delusion which constitutes sickness. But what about believing in yourself? A lot of the time, there may not be any good reason to believe in yourself. But it's still necessary and healthy.

You see what I mean by any of this? I recall some quote from Schwarzenegger in his body building days. He said something like, when he does arm, he pictures his biceps like huge mountains coming to life.

Visualization, delusion, convincing yourself, etc. These are all expressions of some underlying faculty of the mind, effecting your will upon reality and yourself.

It's good to question yourself, of course, but you have to ask yourself sometimes if you're being 1.) Fair 2.) Rational and 3.) Effective.

That's how I see it anyway. I'm still learning. Everyone is.
Frederick Nenderdane - Thu, 12 Oct 2017 06:11:53 EST ID:GHzh7vt/ No.519329 Ignore Report Quick Reply
*arm curls

I never make typos. You didn't see that.
John Smallbanks - Thu, 12 Oct 2017 06:36:46 EST ID:JI9kO00V No.519330 Ignore Report Quick Reply
I agree with this. While I'm not beta or socially awkward, I'm pretty fucking ugly. Not to mention no family to speak of. And let's be real, it IS possible to be ugly enough that I will NEVER date.
I'm essentially to the point, where I either quit and die, or just start making up my own reasons to hold on.

Now obviously it's a wildly different situation your posting about OP. But I think coming up with reasons to trust yourself and others is going to take similar approaches, especially like >>519328 said. Gotta trick yourself. Maybe say "yeah i can't trust these motherfuckers, but it's better than being empty and alone". I'd look into CBT as well OP. It helps with unhealthy thinking and perceptions.

Either way, best luck OP.
Frederick Gemmlestod - Thu, 12 Oct 2017 20:39:42 EST ID:DlJv0rWW No.519348 Ignore Report Quick Reply
thanks :)

i've had mixed results with CBT. you can lead a horse to water, and you may even salt the oats...

Just generally depressed and need life advice by Jack Dandleville - Wed, 11 Oct 2017 01:22:22 EST ID:sAwk6cCB No.519303 Ignore Report Reply Quick Reply
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I just wanted to start off by saying it's been a while since I've been here (years). Not sure what the environment is totally like around here now but it seems pretty chill. Glad to be back. I'm in a pretty long bout of existential crisis recently and am about to spill my guts on a lot of shit so sorry if this gets a bit long.

My problems start with childhood. Without getting to much into it I grew up in a psychologically abusive home. My mom has her own mental issues and essentially became a shut in pharm drug addict pretty early on. She would have me and my older brother do everything in the house since my dad left before I was born. She used to frequently from a young age (8) threaten to harm herself, my brother, myself and our pets if we did not take care of her or if we spoke about it.

After years of this I couldn't stand it anymore and we were slowly beginning to starve because we had gotten so poor that I asked my dad if I could move into him. He was an absent parent and complicit with what was going on with my mom. My step mom hated me. They made sure to make me feel unwelcome.

When I graduated high school I applied for college as far away as I could within the state and gave them all the Irish goodbye after becoming exhausted from trying to hold together what I thought could become a functioning family.

It's been 9 years since I've last seen or spoken to any of my family. I wonder often what happened to my older brother and younger half brothers. I always loved them and still do. I'm not sure what they think of me.

All of the issues with the abuse left me for almost my entire life in a state of anxiety and depression. One of my therapists compared my beliefs and experience as those of someone with PTSD and survivor syndrome.

In addition to this without a support system like a family I quickly became homeless after college unable to find work. Two of my best childhood fri nds helped save my life and kept me on my feet until I could stand alone. I'll never forget what they've done for me and I feel guilty because I cannot yet pay them back for that kindness.
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Cyril Digglestone - Wed, 11 Oct 2017 01:39:54 EST ID:/SOdGi2D No.519304 Ignore Report Quick Reply
i got shit like this too, havent talked to my 2 half brothers in years, shit just happens. sounds like you need to pursue that masters/phd and keep making those 'incremental improvements' until you are where you want to be. i mean honestly you are prob in your 20's. so all the time in the world. even if early 30's, still mucho time.
Polly Buzzleson - Wed, 11 Oct 2017 18:13:58 EST ID:WozaXgtK No.519317 Ignore Report Quick Reply
> I cannot yet pay them back for that kindness.

Don't beat yourself up about it. Don't feel guilty. Guilty over kindness is useless and shit. Be grateful, be appreciative, make sure if they need you that you are ready to repay.

When you do you'll realise something. That if the effort you make works and they actually don't just squander it, that you will not feel owed anything. Instead you'll feel like you got enough out of it just by seeing your friend thrive. Your friends no doubt felt the same.

I'm not sure where to start with the rest but I just wanted to encourage you. Keep making the most of your life. It's not where you are but it's how far you've come that's the true measure of a person. Sadly people can't always see that right away, or sometimes ever, but you can and you should remember that. You've come a long way.
John Smallbanks - Wed, 11 Oct 2017 20:18:27 EST ID:JI9kO00V No.519320 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Well OP, I can relate to a lot of what you are saying. And I'll preface this with, I'm still fucked up. But my childhood was kinda similar. I wont bore you with details (unless you want them). But I've found that moving forward is difficult with an anchor attached to you. For me, most of my family was that anchor. I'd moved away, but not on. And I'm finding, the less weight I carry, the bigger steps I can take.

Now this is where I am struggling, but I'm confident it's the right call. Yes, I may be utterly alone, but those people did horrible things to me. None in my best interest. And while some I left behind were either in a similar spot, or not really involved. It needed to happen. And I need to move on from contemplating all the what if's and why's. Because they depress the fuck out of you. And if they loved you like family, they'd find a way to make it work.

I notice the more ok I become with this concept, the more I could focus on task work, and self improvement. It's helping me settle down some intensities I hold onto from that time.

Right now, I'd focus on you, abd what little things in life make you happy. It can be hard I know, but find anything that can give you a buzz, and expand on that. For example, maybe dogs make you kinda happy. Try going to the pound just to visit, and maybe work up to volunteering. The happier you become, the more motivated you will be about improving and maintaining that happiness.

Good luck OP. It just can never be easy sometimes.

Anxiety about aging and everything that comes with it by James Sabberdock - Wed, 11 Oct 2017 00:57:58 EST ID:L19PcOHI No.519302 Ignore Report Reply Quick Reply
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I don't wanna get old and die, its becoming an all consuming fear of mine so much so that its beginning to interfere with my life to the point I can't fully enjoy myself. I'm 25 and every day I think about how much ass it's gonna suck to get old, and deal with sickness and shit like that. Being stuck in a relationship I'm not really happy in, or worse, being a lonely old guy nobody gives a fuck about.

I haven't eaten in 24 hours and I'm not hungry, in fact it's just the opposite. I feel nauseous.
Cedric Sommerpadge - Wed, 11 Oct 2017 06:58:01 EST ID:GHzh7vt/ No.519308 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Well man, it happens so slowly and gently that you won't notice it. And hopefully by the time it does, you'll have other things that bring you joy besides the good health and looks of youth.

I'm 26, almost 27. I've got a widow's peak in my hairline now, probably from drinking heavily for a few years. I quit though. It used to bother me more, but I think I'm the only one that notices it. Most people don't notice other people's flaws so much as their own.

The thing about a fixated, existential fear like aging is, the more you think about it, the stronger it gets. Fixations feed on attention. There is a way of dealing with this. When you notice the fixation, that all consuming fear of aging, you need to consciously address these thoughts. Remind yourself that the mind is not always rational, and sometimes it must be controlled and regulated, for the greater good.

One of my fixations is, of course, alcohol. I crave it all the time. Despite that, I know beyond a doubt that the cravings are irrational. It's not easy. But the more you ignore it, the weaker it gets.

When you find yourself struggling with these thoughts, and they're not bringing you any benefit, you can turn your attention to other things. Notice any sounds you hear, any smells you smell, anything you're touching, etc. This will do two things. First, it directs your attention away from the fixation, robbing it of its power. Second, it enforces executive command over your emotions- you're in charge here, not your dread.

Beyond that, do what you can to live healthy and happy. And think about the good things that can come with aging. Society seems to worship youth, but there are benefits to growing old. You're wiser, more experienced, you know your limits, you're secure in who you are.

>Being stuck in a relationship I'm not really happy in, or worse, being a lonely old guy nobody gives a fuck about.
My friend, these are concerns not necessarily rooted in aging. But they are very telling of what it is that you value in life, and you would do well to pursue those values. It may well be the true source of your existential dread.
Awe' God !!vVWR8L52 - Wed, 11 Oct 2017 13:48:02 EST ID:hQScIyLB No.519316 Ignore Report Quick Reply
the only way to hit a brick wall is to worry about hitting a brick wall, when you let life happen everything is harmonious.

Really depressed, coming unstable. by Graham Gisslefune - Mon, 02 Oct 2017 07:25:39 EST ID:zPu+Cn1i No.519155 Ignore Report Reply Quick Reply
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I'm having a psych evaluation tomorrow. I'm nervous about being diagnosed because while I know myself to be melancholic and sometimes feel pretty down about the cult of lies we are tricked into following, I don't feel I have a neurotransmitter issue. In fact I'm very sure the circumstance of my partnership/shared parenthood is the great source of stress.

>Meet girl from Philippines
>Have great relationship, fall in love
>Get her pregnant, whoops but yay
>Move in together
>Shit starts to change
>She's actually got a shit-load of baggage
>Don't we all?
>Eventually my diplomacy fails, violence ensues
>I take it like a champ/bitch, until I don't.
>Restrain her one night, so instead she hits her pregnant belly/my son
>I call the cops, she says she'll never forgive that
>The feeling is mutual.
>More violence, now with manipulation and control issues!
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Molly Fimblenon - Thu, 05 Oct 2017 02:29:54 EST ID:zPu+Cn1i No.519202 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Sorry for the late reply, been an intense couple of days.

I can't excuse any of those deplorable things she did, I'm just saying that I made out with the co-worker while we were first dating, then after breaking it off because I didn't feel ready for a commitment, started a FWB thing with this co-worker. She caught feelings and I realised I wanted more than this, so I broke it off and later got back with my current partner. Unfortunately she decided to snoop through my e-mails and found evidence of this and has since resented me.

Your advice is pretty sound, I know that she has a real issue with anger and now I have a very short fuse myself. I don't do the relationship justice and there is a lot of love for each other. I'd really like to avoid 'throwing the baby out with the bathwater' as it were; if there's any chance to change things or repair, then things could be great.

I guess I feel like it's now a matter of forgiving her for those things. She's working on her own problems now, and regardless of how things go, I should learn to forgive because I gotta let that shit go. On a conscious level I see that this is an unconscious reflex - someone who attacks me or threatens to take my son from me is hard-wired as my enemy, but no matter the obstacles I gotta learn to trust.
Graham Tootshaw - Thu, 05 Oct 2017 19:35:03 EST ID:/SOdGi2D No.519213 Ignore Report Quick Reply
you are an unfit human being, let alone parent. divorce, put child up for adoption, contemplate how to live a life less made of shit
Fuck Lightway - Mon, 09 Oct 2017 00:39:22 EST ID:asvLTzvV No.519259 Ignore Report Quick Reply
disgusting bpd woman meets man
Fucking Worthingwater - Mon, 09 Oct 2017 19:39:14 EST ID:zPu+Cn1i No.519277 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Weak responses, nb.
John Nobbleshit - Tue, 10 Oct 2017 10:44:21 EST ID:3qSLtzLv No.519285 Ignore Report Quick Reply
pregnancy hormones and post pregnancy hormones may have poisoned her brain a little, maybe with therapy and medication she can become that other person again

therapy for both of you would be a good idea, try to be friends, try to be compassionate, because she has fucking mental issues, jesus

Sorry, fucked up situation. It's very hard to know what to do when you get pregnant with someone you love but don't know well, what happened to you is what literally everyone is terrified will happen when they fall in love. The same thing basically happened to my aunt and pretty much ruined her life, but she got two wonderful human beings out of it, my cousins.

Repression by Luka - Thu, 05 Oct 2017 03:57:33 EST ID:ehHgF93r No.519205 Ignore Report Reply Quick Reply
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I've not been here in a while, but I've lurked much in the past and am looking for any kind of help or stories relating to this. Thanks ahead of time!

I'm a 26 year old female, and I've been experiencing what I can only explain as memories I don't fully remember, abuse of some kind that I believe happened to me around the age of 4-6, and it's very tramatizing, but I only remember a lamp, couch, colors, and I really have no idea who it was. I'm kind of having... bad flash backs now, I'm unable to sleep, and the less I sleep, the more I think, remember, and I really would rather just forget it and be like I was before I started remembering. I don't want to keep remembering more, I just want it to go away.

But I don't know how, and friends have started asking why I seem so upset lately when I have no reason, but I don't know what to say. Much less do about it. I can't afford a therapist right now, and I'm really not sure what's going on our what to do.

TLDR: childhood abuse, how to forget, again.
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Augustus Tootcocke - Thu, 05 Oct 2017 09:05:06 EST ID:kAEKpfyQ No.519209 Ignore Report Quick Reply
It's literally far more likely that you're "remembering" something that never happened than you actually were abused and forgot about it. People don't really repress these sort of memories. That was a myth perpetuated by pop-science and it made a whole bunch of cases where people started convincing themselves that they must have repressed memories of abuse. A whole bunch of people started thinking they were abused when they really weren't just because they heard that children often repress bad memories. They would report having vague memories like yours at first which would grow stronger the more they focused on them until they were certain they had been abused.
Jack Grandcocke - Thu, 05 Oct 2017 12:31:14 EST ID:/tr9BMtZ No.519210 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Where did you get that circle pic? I've seen it used before.
Nigel Geshbere - Thu, 05 Oct 2017 13:18:30 EST ID:WV91K+Uu No.519211 Ignore Report Quick Reply
I don't know the facts on this but it's also possible you had a nightmare OP and have let it become a thing. It is possible you're repressing something but you should explore the possibility that maybe you're not and you may be harming yourself. I don't want to trivilise your trauma if it's real but what would be worse would be you becoming depressed and ruined because of something that isn't real.

I only say this because the human mind can create it's own viruses of thought out of a single incident and maintain them through the fear of the repeat and being upset at their existence. Take anxiety for example. I have anxiety disorder it does not hinder me any more. It is a product of my basic nature mixed with my life experiences. At one point I had my first proper anxiety attack and I thought I was dying. For weeks I was unable to sleep and was constantly checking my pulse. Every now and then it comes back for a day or three but I kick it into touch. But when I realised it was in my head (and did some things to ram that home) it stopped bothering me. I still get the chest pains and light headedness fairly often, thinking about anxiety has made the symptoms appear, but because I know it's in my head when this post finishes and I focus on going to the gym or making dinner or whatever it will go.

Anyway my point is that my anxiety was triggered by stress and self doubt but it was sustained by fear of the anxiety, by being worried about the state of my mind. And that is why I worry this guy might be right.

I've had some really fucked up nightmares and dreams, I've woken up with tears on my face and they've had a real emotional connection to my life but at the same time they're not real. But they provoke and extreme emotional response.

Anyway get therapy but consider that it might not be real. Go into therapy with the first goal of establishing if anything happened and go from there.
Graham Tootshaw - Thu, 05 Oct 2017 19:36:37 EST ID:/SOdGi2D No.519214 Ignore Report Quick Reply

it's an ancient symbol associated with taoism and buddhism. represents infinity and/or nothingness and/or the cyclical nature of things (nature, life/death/rebirth, whatever)
Oliver Bipperlot - Sat, 07 Oct 2017 07:06:38 EST ID:GHzh7vt/ No.519223 Ignore Report Quick Reply

college social life at 30? by Molly Broddlewell - Fri, 29 Sep 2017 02:54:35 EST ID:/dqI8T0n No.519093 Ignore Report Reply Quick Reply
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So I was a permavirgin sperglord all through my teenage years, and then in a relationship all through my 20s. I completely skipped dating and partying in my younger years, all of that. I also didn't start college til I was 29. I broke up with my ex earlier this year. (I turned 30 in august). Thing is, I'm definitely the most attractive I've ever been - physically and personality-wise. And my social skills are a million times better. So for that last quarter - my first quarter single in college - I was getting results, I hooked up with a couple of different pretty attractive girls..

So now after all these years, I'm finally single and in college, but I'm 30 now. I'm surrounded by all these hot girls and most of them are so much younger than me. I was doing OK at 29, but now that I've had a brief taste of that life I'm afraid that it's already all over. Cause I know 30 is a big step, psychologically. 30 was "old" when I was that age. So, honestly, bluntly: Do I stand a snowball's chance in hell in the college dating scene? Will college girls still fuck me now that I'm 30? Also, will I be able to find people to hang with, or get invited to house shows and parties? Or did I completely screw the pooch not breaking up earlier. I'm much more interested in spending time with at least a somewhat younger crowd, and definitely dating younger women, most people my age and even in their late 20s, their personality has started to mellow put and they're not as loud and dynamic and that's what I want in my life.

Anecdotal replies from other guys my age in school would be especially appreciated
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Phineas Gonkinman - Wed, 04 Oct 2017 11:01:31 EST ID:1kbRpa3f No.519185 Ignore Report Quick Reply
27 y/o currently dating a 20 y/o

I can confirm that young girls love older "mature" men
Alice Bunderfedge - Wed, 04 Oct 2017 17:17:08 EST ID:0wWM6p+c No.519195 Ignore Report Quick Reply
If you want flings and hook ups then just drop a couple of years from your age when you tell them. Say you're 25/26 if it puts your mind at ease. Go out there and get that 20 year old ass.
Angus Bevingshaw - Fri, 06 Oct 2017 23:38:14 EST ID:/pl3Lein No.519217 Ignore Report Quick Reply
What the fuck, man. If you think the number 30 is such a big deal, how about you just say that you are 29? I don't understand any of this.
Nell Dubblechare - Sat, 07 Oct 2017 03:59:56 EST ID:DlJv0rWW No.519221 Ignore Report Quick Reply
If you are healthy part of the community, you will benefit as such. If you are a maladjusted weirdo, that's the kinda pussy and respect you'll get.

avoid shitting where you sleep, btw.
it would be a shame if your academic career was jeopardized by a party, group of girls in a car, etc.
Oliver Bipperlot - Sat, 07 Oct 2017 07:05:00 EST ID:GHzh7vt/ No.519222 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Fuck it, pretend you're 31. That oughta fuck with your ego.

mixed thoughts by shit post - Sun, 24 Sep 2017 06:34:49 EST ID:RLper1nr No.518958 Ignore Report Reply Quick Reply
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I need to see this written out.

I am just tired of being here. Never being able to fully connect with someone. At least on a level of intimacy that I could enjoy. I do not know how much of it is actually me versus a projected perspective of myself but in all honesty I know I am probably the last person to come to mind when someone envisions attraction.

I really think what is hitting me these past years is just feeling so alone and then feeling like I have no way of changing that. I do not just sit around and feel sorry about my circumstances. I do make an effort to try and put myself out there. A few years ago I moved, losing friends that I had for over five years.

It is hard to relate to other people too. Everyone seems to be focused on social media interactions and other meaningless conversation. I can talk about it and produce a conversation but it just does not feel...needed. I just don't care about these things in life and I feel like I have to keep up to date just to be able to talk with someone. But all of that is irrelevant, somewhat.

I talk about how I want a deeper connection with other people but at the same time I continually push people away who try and make any kind of a connection with me. I see other people who can just do all of this as if it is second nature to them. For me, it all feels as if I some sort of foreign invasion to the whole concept being able to function correctly.

I do not want to put my life on a pedestal either. I know others have had life circumstances way harder than mine. I just realize now I'm approaching 30 and I have never had a meaningful relationship. Even further, all of my relationships have been in some form to use myself as a means to an end. A large part of that is my own doing. I think I seek out people who will stick around but be a negative influence. I think beyond this point I would just be rambling but it has been a long time since I have felt that I should still be here. I have less excuses now than I did before
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David Dambleshit - Fri, 29 Sep 2017 04:21:44 EST ID:h/1sxUpj No.519098 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>incidence of each side effect is under half. You will have half of the side effects

That... that's not how that works. Not at all. What that means is that half of all patients taking them will experience one or more of the side effects, not that you will experience half of the listed side effects.
Isabella Boblingtick - Sat, 30 Sep 2017 17:50:15 EST ID:y4dzzy4B No.519122 Ignore Report Quick Reply
OP, about the anti-depressants' side effects, they may suck but sometimes they last like a day or two. Is not a big deal, the feelings and other stuff you are describing are
I've been extreamly depressed since I was a kid, the same thoughs you are expressing and other stuff to. I broke when I was 18 and I finally decided to get help at 19. Psychotherapy sucked for me, because, in a similar to you way, I knew everything I was doing wrong and why I was experiencing what I was experiencing. Then I went to the shrink, got diagnosed bipolar, started taking lamotrigine (which is not an anti-depressant tho) and I'm much better. Far from being a normal and "good" person but not as far as before.
You see everything as meaningless but still feel pain about it, that means you actually do hang on something. This can be good or actually be exactly what is making you miserable beyond possible (and very likely) chemical inbalance.
good luck
Polly Chiblinghick - Sun, 01 Oct 2017 06:18:30 EST ID:3qSLtzLv No.519129 Ignore Report Quick Reply
I would take physical pain over psychological pain any day.
Barnaby Smallgold - Sun, 01 Oct 2017 20:45:48 EST ID:4I/hIj3s No.519145 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Ok OP, first about the antidepressants. My experience with them was simply INCREDIBLE

I was depressed af, cutting myself and writing about raping women , until I was 24 or 25. Then I started taking paxil. The very first day I took the pill (probably placebo effect) I engaged in conversation with a girl from my building when we took the elevator together. Nothing big, just "hey, did you see X?" but prior to that I would just stare at the mirror and not say anything.

After this, it kept getting better and better. I was so relaxed, I could talk to everybody. I made a lot of friends, went to a lot of parties, got laid. Two years after I began taking it, I decided I was going to stop. So I did, and eventually I was able to feel just happy without the pills. I just needed to find out how it felt to be that kind of person, and then I was able to do it myself without any medication.

I still have some anxiety problems, but my social anxiety is almost gone now. I can talk to girls I see on the bus, on the train, random girls i walk by in the street. It's all because I was able to practice for two years with a little push from the pills, so I think that might be helpful for some other people.

Secondly, making lasting connections is not easy. I have met over 200 people and I only keep in touch with <10. Most people we meet are just "accidents"; we are not really meant to click with each other. So don't give up! You don't win a marathon by just showing up without practice. I know sometimes social media crap can be annoying, but part of being smart is learning how to become engaged in things that you wouldn't normally engage in. Like normie stuff, partying, etc. Just don't let it take over your whole life
shit post - Thu, 05 Oct 2017 07:31:52 EST ID:RLper1nr No.519208 Ignore Report Quick Reply

That is how I want my end goal to look like. I have had these thoughts and mindset for as long as I can remember but I know at previous points I was capable in those aspects. Now I feel like pudding and see myself burning opportunities away left and right for nothing.

Falling For A Methed Out Woman by Blunt Vendor - Mon, 02 Oct 2017 01:29:43 EST ID:AwrgW6PH No.519150 Ignore Report Reply Quick Reply
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There's no way to ease into this, plain and simple.
I've caught feelings for a young woman hooked on meth.
The moment I first saw her, I knew she was trouble. When I look into her eyes, I see a lot of pain and fire, and I can see a brilliant mind somewhere in there. She's smart enough to blow me away at times, and I'm not easily impressed.
Mutual friends have told me much about how smart and beautiful she used to be, and how diminished she is now. Another person really close to her informed me that she's been having body image issues as a result, which is something that helps fuel her habit.
Honestly, that shit bothers, because I think she's beautiful who she is. Beauty isn't on the outside. It's a combination of your body, mind, heart, and spirit. Who you are is also a culmination of your experiences, trials, and adaptations.
She used to be wild and free, and no shit she'll always be wild and free.

Should she choose to overcome meth, she'd be a 13/10 to me, but it looks like I'd have to be there the whole time.
So far, the slow approach has been the only possible option, and it's been trucking along slowly.
It was established long ago that she has an interest in me and thinks I'm smart, which was supposedly a plus.
Now, she's usually hitting me up when she's coming down. Usually within 2 hours of crash.

Oh, forgot to mention, it was cleared that she's single and down for whatever. She's a real chill hippie type.

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Blunt Vendor - Wed, 04 Oct 2017 01:43:15 EST ID:AwrgW6PH No.519180 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Ended up spending all day with her. We did responsible adult stuff before shit started happening. We did a lot of walking, talking, and chilling. Got food as well. Despite the hiccups and shortcomings, it was still an amazing day.
One of our mutual dumbass friends ended up going off on her for something stupid, really upset her. I chose her over him, because I know he'd choose his girl over me (As he always does, duh).
Cheered her back up and got her to stop crying while we were walking a long ways.
So far so good.

Welcome to Schroedinger's /qq/ thread.
It's both a problem and not a problem.
Hopefully this becomes a story that gives hope instead of warning.
Addicts really do need a lot of love, patience, and hope to succeed, I believe.
Alice Bunderfedge - Wed, 04 Oct 2017 17:08:46 EST ID:0wWM6p+c No.519194 Ignore Report Quick Reply

Addicts need to want to get clean otherwise all of this is a waste of your time. Giving her support and something positive to aim for is good but don't give her all of you or a relationship untill she getting off the Meth. If she likes you that much she will give it up, if not then perhaps she's not worth a great deal of effort.
Blunt Vendor - Thu, 05 Oct 2017 00:13:21 EST ID:AwrgW6PH No.519199 Ignore Report Quick Reply
She wants to, but knows she's fucking hooked.
The only thing I offer her is my heart. She managed to pull it from the freezer, and no one else has.
Aside from that, heart can shut the fuck up.
Blunt Vendor - Thu, 05 Oct 2017 00:16:13 EST ID:AwrgW6PH No.519200 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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On a bad day, I only waste like 30 minutes out of my day trying to check on her. That's mainly just legging it. Nbd.
Nothing to lose, everything to gain.
John Nobbleshit - Tue, 10 Oct 2017 10:49:58 EST ID:3qSLtzLv No.519286 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Louis Theroux has a great documentary on older meth addicts. The fairtail outcome (outcome A)is that you'll help her get off the meth and the two of you will live happily ever after (or have a normal relationship that ends in a shitstorm, like most relationships because people are complicated).
The other outcome (outcome B)is she is going to be on this for life, which may not be very long. She'll waste all her money, get uglier and uglier, constantly quit it and then end up back on it, will break your heart every single day, and eventually die in your arms, or worse, she just won't come home one day.

You know that, right? So you gotta be okay with both outcomes, you gotta decide that B would be worth it anyway, because otherwise you don't deserve A

Emotional Support for someone you don't really know by Fanny Gomblefield - Sun, 01 Oct 2017 23:36:02 EST ID:TiaOcGcD No.519148 Ignore Report Reply Quick Reply
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So in a VERY last minute decision I moved to China earlier on in the month to teach English. For the first 3 days I was living in a huge apartment by myself, but then I got a flatmate. Basically what happened is him and his girlfriend (both of them teaching at the school) broke up and he obviously needed a place to stay.

So, I'm thrown into this situation with this guy I know fuck all about other than that on the night out he started a fight with this dude (who everyone loves) and that he was reckless enough to book a flight to Thailand that night but missed it.

That said, he's actually proved to be a pretty sound guy and we've gotten on much better than I would have hoped. Had a few good conversations and some good laughs, we're very different though.

Anyway, I've been trying to cheer him up over his break up, just being someone to listen to and rattling off standard "you'll feel better eventually" bullshit that people just want to hear when they are going through a break up.

NOW THOUGH, His gran is dying, this is happening right now, and I just feel like I am a bit out of my element? I can talk bullshit to someone about them feeling better about relationships but the death of a loved family member makes me feel a bit ill equipped to deal with.

Anyone got some tips on how to deal with this situation? He's out for a bike ride by himself right now but will be back soon.
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Samuel Gammlebanks - Mon, 02 Oct 2017 23:40:42 EST ID:o3vIoRWZ No.519167 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Death of a close person who raised you is far out of anyone's league. But you still can have an important role in them better dealing with that situation (apart from expressing sympathy).

You're in the perfect position to ground him being that you live with him. Direct his attention to mundane everyday life in your home. Chores, plans, the like.

This will do two things: distract him from the pain and worry, and show him that life still goes on as usual even during/after tragedies.

Dude's just lost one important thing, and is about to lose another one, this time an irreplaceable one. Plus in thus crisis, he managed to drop and break other things, like travel, friends, reputation. He must feel like in the middle of an earthquake.

What you can do is a great thing, particularly because you don't know him. You can help him regain firm footing.

No deep shit. Just washing dishes. No heart to heart talk. Just drinking coffee together in the morning. Ya feel me? This will save him.
Samuel Gammlebanks - Tue, 03 Oct 2017 00:18:17 EST ID:o3vIoRWZ No.519168 Ignore Report Quick Reply
OP can suck his roommates dick even if he's not a girl, ya homophobe.
Shit Fondlestock - Tue, 03 Oct 2017 01:19:10 EST ID:94uHFygY No.519171 Ignore Report Quick Reply
im the nigga who replied to your thread saying "hehe tell me how you feel in a month"

i see your happiness lasted 3 days. looking forward to your end-of-october update
Fanny Duckfield - Tue, 03 Oct 2017 20:57:50 EST ID:mGPUta/s No.519178 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Chill homie, I always knew I would get a room mate. It just happened a bit more suddenly than I had planned. He's the one hating it here, not me. I'm still having a great time! Was just looking for a bit of advice in the place I usually turn to when I don't know what to do. Keep your eyes out for my post end of October, I'll post a link to my blog there too so you can get even MORE updates.

If anyone is interested he's decided to leave China. All this time he's been saying that he expects there's a chance he'll get together with his GF again and that "if I leave I could be back here in 4 months and me and her will go travelling".

Whenever he said this stuff I just nodded and kept quiet. I think today it sunk in how unrealistic all of that was. I've been speaking to him lots and encouraging him (with some success) to come out but today he's changed and just wants to be alone. I'm not gonna force it on him and I think he's just through in the next room coming to terms with the fact his relationship of 4 years has just ended. He was saying stuff like "I wish she'd just cheat on me so I'd know it was over" and "If there was even a 1% chance that I think it could work I would stay". Just wanted to tell him to listen to himself and how he would feel if he heard me or anyone else talking like that.

Everyone else is on Holiday now so it's just me and him around. Tomorrow we're gonna go to Hong Kong and I'll see him off. Feeling surprisingly emotional considering I've only known him a week. From what I can tell he's a good guy and he's got exciting shit going down in Holland where he's gonna begin a new job. Pretty cool he can abandon shit here so quick and go straight into something totally different on the other side of the world.

I wish him the best but realistically there's almost no way I'll ever see him again. He's sold me his scooter and his hiking boots and I reckon he's also gonna leave some other shit here. I know pretty much nothing about the dude who he's getting replaced with other than that we share a mutual friend (who invited us both out) and we…
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George Grimlock - Wed, 04 Oct 2017 11:08:27 EST ID:3qSLtzLv No.519187 Ignore Report Quick Reply

Hello, Irish person?

Anyway, is there any way he can get home? If he can, he should. If he can't just tell him you are there if he wants to talk, and listen to him and nod.. And say things like "oh god that's awful" when he says something that is awful. That's all people need, they need you to want to listen and they need you to listen and acknowledge how shit things are so that they feel a bit less alone.

Read your update, It sounds like you did a good job with this situation.

I feel so gross by Nigel Tootdock - Mon, 25 Sep 2017 02:04:06 EST ID:/v/fnY4O No.518979 Ignore Report Reply Quick Reply
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A couple of months ago, I went to a concert at my university and, obviously, got pretty drunk. Anyhow, I ended up hooking up with a fat chick in a bathroom nd it's making me feel super disgusted with myself. I've been tripping out thinking about how awkward it'd be if I ever met her again, or her friends recognized me, or something. I felt so creepy doing it
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Walter Meffingwell - Sat, 30 Sep 2017 12:39:56 EST ID:3qSLtzLv No.519115 Ignore Report Quick Reply
my boyfriend wouldn't be with me if I was fat, I don't think he would break up with me if I became fat, but he wouldn't be with me if I was fat to begin with. Doesn't that suck though? Don't you think it would suck to know your girlfriend wouldn't have fallen for you if you'd had a few more strips of bacon or glasses of wine? I mean, it's all that tenuous, you know?
Clara Billingshaw - Sat, 30 Sep 2017 15:43:18 EST ID:kAEKpfyQ No.519118 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Drink more alcohol.
Walter Wocklechit - Sun, 01 Oct 2017 02:43:44 EST ID:U5lO1hLA No.519127 Ignore Report Quick Reply
I had sex with a woman who was 330 pounds once.

It was disgusting. She had to lift a fold for me to enter her.

I call her sex pudding.
Polly Chiblinghick - Sun, 01 Oct 2017 06:17:06 EST ID:3qSLtzLv No.519128 Ignore Report Quick Reply
it's called a fup
Barnaby Smallgold - Sun, 01 Oct 2017 20:34:20 EST ID:4I/hIj3s No.519142 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>Don't you think it would suck to know your girlfriend wouldn't have fallen for you if you'd had a few more strips of bacon or glasses of wine

Not really. We all are selective, and when it comes to sexuality the window of opportunity is not that wide, you really have to be lucky or make an effort to fit in the "handsome" category.

We are superficial creatures, we judge by what we see. It sucks, I know. But that's how it works.

In love with my practice gf by William Gemmerspear - Tue, 26 Sep 2017 21:12:35 EST ID:9wOsmSAI No.519025 Ignore Report Reply Quick Reply
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>23 khv
>meet a girl off tinder
>had boyfriends and herpes
>fuck it, want to get my dick wet, not going to marry her
>ff a few years
>realize I've fallen in love with this practice gf
>a part from being a non-virgin she's a perfect gf
>she loves me, my dick and cares about me so much.

I think she's the one, and I couldn't imagine being with anyone else. I know that at my age, finding a girl who doesn't have a past is hard and I know that if I leave her, I might find a girl who's a bigger whore, or a virgin with a shit personality. Is there a way that I can stop thinking about it? I've been considering fucking some hookers n shit to even the score, so whenever I think about how she's a whore, I can remind myself I was with an actual whore.
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Nigel Clevinghall - Thu, 28 Sep 2017 21:21:29 EST ID:pEnCA1MP No.519090 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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William Gongerfotch - Fri, 29 Sep 2017 13:37:49 EST ID:WV91K+Uu No.519104 Ignore Report Quick Reply
But you fucked a random with no intention of marriage OP.

Are you a hypocrite or a troll?

Oh well. Either way you're probably miserable and deserve it nb.
Hedda Sovingstug - Sun, 01 Oct 2017 11:24:07 EST ID:8vq+ulI+ No.519131 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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>apart from being a non-virgin she's a perfect gf
Who the hell is still a virgin past their teenage years? What is this line supposed to mean? You might wanna chase nuns.
Barnaby Smallgold - Sun, 01 Oct 2017 20:31:09 EST ID:4I/hIj3s No.519141 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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>Who the hell is still a virgin past their teenage years
Uh, lots of people? I've met a lot of girls on their 20s who are virgins, and they're not necessarily religious, they just haven't had much social interaction. Don't believe what this idiot said here >>519038
>but finding a virgin at 23 is going to basically be impossible

Not true. My first gf was 24, a virgin. My second gf was 22, she had had only one other partner. Third gf was 25, also one partner. Not every girl fucks every cock they come across

HAVING SAID THAT (pic related)

OP, you're gonna have to admit that a lot of women are being incredibly open about their sexuality these days, and they will ALWAYS ALWAYS have the upper hand when it comes to numbers. I have met some ugly 4/10s who told me about how much dick they were getting, fucking as many men every month as the number of women I fucked in the last 5 years. And believe me, I was really trying to get laid.

You just have to think about it in terms of "fleeting experiences". Your girl probably enjoys meeting new guys, and guys love fucking. So she tries to please them (and herself in the process) so she fucks them. If she met men who were into museums or watercolor painting, would you be mad that she got to do those things with other boys first? Men want to fuck, and fuck quickly. So if she's very sociable, chances are she's got dick thrown at her from every direction. But none of it stuck to her, until you came along.

I understand how you fee, don't get me wrong. I met an English teacher here in my country (south america, not saying which one) and she has fucked so many dudes here, I found it upsetting at first. I felt jealous, but I realized that it was just a dumb thing to feel. I mean, here I am trying to fuck a girl within the first two dates and then I expect her not to do the same with the men she meets, or I expect other men to be "respectful" and wait until marriage? I know better than that, I'm not gonna be a hypocrite. So what I did was just try to forget about it, try to have a great time with her, and try to be better than all those other boys she's been fucking.
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Ian Senderdale - Thu, 05 Oct 2017 03:17:42 EST ID:h/1sxUpj No.519203 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Right, because you're married to this girl?
So it's fine to break the rule with you, just not with anyone else.
If you had been around a bit more you'd probably realise how that sex is pretty meaningless in and off itself.
Also the key theory is retarded, I mean apart from the fact that dicks bear a superficial similarity to keys and vaginas to locks I'm not sure there's a lot to it. I mean, 1 goes in things the other has things go in it. 10/10 theory.

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