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Miss my ex in a platonic way by Nigel Porringchedging - Mon, 20 Mar 2017 05:51:30 EST ID:vKvaev27 No.514627 Ignore Report Quick Reply
File: 1490003490716.jpg -(37665B / 36.78KB, 640x625) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size. 37665
I've posted a bit about this girl before years ago

>4 years ago
>started dating girl who was very close friend growing up
>she started cheating on me the day my best friend killed himself, with another friend
>Shitty as fuck year

I haven't seen or talked to her since 2013
>Saturday
>at after party of some show
>See her, im like wtf
>end up sitting at this party with her for 4 hours doing blow and talking
>Take her home, lay on her couch with her for like 12 hours talking about life
>She lives at ex boyfriends house, on the couch
>She was a travelling crust punk for 3 1/2 years
>ended up getting a job growing pot in a legal state
>Got raped by someone she worked with
>came home a few weeks ago
>Completely miserable since she got raped, started drinking every day, stopped taking care of herself
>Stopped eating, doesnt really drink water. Just drinks cheap ass booze all day
>Wears the same dirty ass clothes every day, doesnt shower
>lives in the living room of an apartment with her ex boyfriend and his tranny heroin addict roommate, deep in the hood, where people get shot on her street and shit. On a small broken couch surrounded by empty booze bottles and packs of cigarettes

fuck, i never thought i'd feel bad for this girl, i always wished her the worst. But I feel so bad for her. I have no interest in her or sexual feelings for her or anything, but before we were in a relationship, she was a great friend of mine growing up. We chilled every day for years growing up, and it got ruined when we started fucking. It felt nice to just lay next to her and hold her and talk about life for hours, but it was miserable to watch, she just got totally shitfaced the entire time and has had a very fucked up life since we broke up. Shes the same person she was when I met her deep down, but shes been everywhere and has way more life experience.

I feel so beta
>>
Phoebe Nummerwig - Mon, 20 Mar 2017 05:58:34 EST ID:4D3dcOG1 No.514628 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>514627
Compassion is never wrong brother, even tho it can be hard to muster sometimes. What do you plan to do OP?

I mean, watcha thinking? Or are you just venting? Which is completely ok btw
>>
Nigel Porringchedging - Mon, 20 Mar 2017 06:01:40 EST ID:vKvaev27 No.514629 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>514628
i'm just venting, but i want to help this girl but i dont want to ruin my life doing it, and i dont want to be in a relationship or have sex with her or anything. I deserve better than this trainwreck, i have a 60 g's a year career ahead of me when she sits here and says that she doesnt believe in money and is an anarchist and works at a pizza place. I dont have time for that shit.

But I just wish i could help her and teach her how to love herself. I tried adding her on facebook after hanging out with her (she told me to) and she hasn't accepted my friend request yet, but it also looks like she hasn't been on in a few days. Who really knows though.
>>
Phoebe Nummerwig - Mon, 20 Mar 2017 06:19:10 EST ID:4D3dcOG1 No.514630 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>514629
Yeah I getcha, she might not want to dwell on things or have a million other reasons for not adding you, people are pretty complex and stuff, and shit gets even weirder when your life is a mess.

You could ask if she wanted to crash on your couch or something instead of living in squalor, but it might be emotionally draining on both of you. It would still be a better environment tho, and maybe a better arena for her to stop drinking her life away and start applying for better work to get her own apartment or something. Maybe gettin some professional help

Honestly, it's probably best to just leave her alone. It's a good thing wanting to do something, but usually people in situations like that don't want pity or help. I have been in something kinda similar, and I just ended up pretty jaded by the whole affair. I don't know tho, you just gotta do what feels like the right thing to do. It might be as easy as being a friend to her, grabbing cup of tea once in a while or something.
>>
Nigel Porringchedging - Mon, 20 Mar 2017 08:07:24 EST ID:vKvaev27 No.514632 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Now she just started following me on instagram at 6 am so i'm just confused
>>
Nigel Porringchedging - Mon, 20 Mar 2017 08:46:55 EST ID:vKvaev27 No.514633 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>514630
>You could ask if she wanted to crash on your couch or something instead of living in squalor, but it might be emotionally draining on both of you. It would still be a better environment tho, and maybe a better arena for her to stop drinking her life away and start applying for better work to get her own apartment or something. Maybe gettin some professional help

I've thought about this, but theres no way she'd want to live by me. I don't live in the city, and i'm moving even further into the boonies in a few months to be closer to my apprenticeship. Plus, she doesn't seem like she wants to better herself that much. She did mention that she has some money saved from her pizza job and is getting an apartment in a better part of town though.

>Honestly, it's probably best to just leave her alone. It's a good thing wanting to do something, but usually people in situations like that don't want pity or help.
True, but I thought it was strange because she told me that I'm the only person shes told that shes gotten raped, she hasn't even told her best girlfriends because she thought they'd judge her, so I thought it was a cry for help from someone she trusts. She said that the only other person shes told is her ex boyfriend whose couch she lives on and hes just completely disgusted by her, and she also says that she doesnt believe in psychologists, she believes in telling people she trusts about her problems.

>I have been in something kinda similar, and I just ended up pretty jaded by the whole affair. I don't know tho, you just gotta do what feels like the right thing to do. It might be as easy as being a friend to her, grabbing cup of tea once in a while or something.

Yea, I'll probably offer to take her out for breakfast sometime soon, or go see an old friends new band.
>>
Nathaniel Hidgemedging - Mon, 20 Mar 2017 11:16:34 EST ID:n1yNxChx No.514640 Ignore Report Quick Reply
you can try to help when you can but only badness will result from trying to control her or things in general
>>
Nigel Porringchedging - Mon, 20 Mar 2017 13:45:26 EST ID:vKvaev27 No.514642 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>514640
yea, i learned this from her years ago.
>>
Blackie-Chan - Mon, 20 Mar 2017 22:21:07 EST ID:YSgLqHnY No.514652 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>514627
>Miss my ex
I'm gonna stop you right there. Once someone scars you so much that you can't forgive them, even when they apologize, you should just excise them from your life.
So your ex's life went to shit after you two broke up. What does that have to do with you or your life?
Don't let your ex's shitty luck or judgement fuck up your life.


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