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Mood swing by David Seckleville - Wed, 09 Jan 2019 15:39:42 EST ID:H53rgD4s No.528660 Ignore Report Quick Reply
File: 1547066382210.gif -(35677B / 34.84KB, 750x750) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size. 35677
In the last few days I've been doing absolutely nothing but sleeping. I did something here and there, had half a meal a day, went to bed and rinse and repeat, basically been feeling really down. It's a common occurrence followed by short lasting ups such as now, on a whim, I simply dressed up, took the car and went to the store to buy some snacks, a couple of beer cans and energy drinks feeling all nice and "happy" like a little kid who gets a chocolate bar from his mom so I could stay up all night to call the employer because he told me he'd call me the next morning which was today but didn't. I know I shouldn't have expect nothing from such statement but I'm going to be persistent this time and call him instead tomorrow morning and have a chat. And if that doesn't work out then I'll start pursuing jobs outside my interests and occupation as long as they're safe and not too difficult.

I haven't posted on /qq/ for about a year and wasn't sure whether to post here on /b/ but users are all kinds of wacky there and this has always been the most civilized and safest place on this site. I have plenty of issues but I don't intend to bother anyone with those, I've been feeling suicidal for a couple of years which isn't too much considering how pathetic my life has been this decade. And I've come conclusion I'd never off myself (except in some extreme situations), it just isn't worth losing a life because some brain chemicals are mixed up, and that's not even including the loss others would feel, there aren't many people who'd mourn for me but they're still there. I believe there is a small percentage of my life going into right direction but that is better than nothing and I will hold onto that belief.

Basically I'm typing out my thoughts but I know this positive feeling won't last too long and I'll feel like a complete worthless, useless, pathetic and sad sack of shit again. Can't wait for the day when I'll finally get out the first gear and start working on myself. This year is going to be another waste of time, I know it no matter how much I am going to delude myself into thinking otherwise.

On a ps. note, I'm not a native English speaker so this also comes as a bit of an exercise which is another feel good feeling.
>>
Esther Billingfield - Thu, 10 Jan 2019 02:47:08 EST ID:LLCN0lvu No.528682 Ignore Report Quick Reply
1547106428989.jpg -(102049B / 99.66KB, 338x367) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size.
>>528660
>I believe there is a small percentage of my life going into right direction

what does "the right direction" mean to you?

>I know this positive feeling won't last too long

Can you tell me what exactly changes? Do you get bored, anxious, depressed, what?

>this year is going to be another waste of time

look, it's all a waste of time anyways, you have to learn to ride that nihilism into the grave - starting today! It's impossible to delude yourself into being happy, so why not just accept the truth of the matter and get on with whatever bullshit you want to?

your english is fine, and I hope you reply
>>
Ben Cartwright - Thu, 10 Jan 2019 03:41:35 EST ID:hBEhmcBg No.528683 Ignore Report Quick Reply
1547109695489.png -(217140B / 212.05KB, 320x276) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size.
I feel you very much dude, because I also get those mood swings all the fucking time, because I'm also a completely pathetic piece of shit that does nothing but loafing around all day. I also do that little thing where I go "Oh man, maybe a little TREAT will get me right" and I buy some shit I don't really want to eat and drink (because I'm sober now so my treats suck) and it just never does anymore, because I'm not high and I'm not fucking eight years old.

I guess my tip is start to do something. Like, whatever, just get a shitty fucking job and maybe you can get blowjobs from the ugly girl they don't let work at the counter or something. It sounds like you're on that track tho, so that's good, I'm not there yet myself. I'm going to get admitted for my funny mental issues very soon hopefully, so I guess that's SOMETHING.

And that's something I'd advice you to do also OP! If you're always lethargic and depressed, get fucking help. And not from any stupid fucking self-help books, if you're gonna go that route, at least get some sage shit like Schopenhauer or Marcus Aurelius, some people that lived a fucking life and have great advice to part on about LIFE, and not stupid fucking whats-his-name J.J MacCocksucker (that asshole that everyone jokes about, the guy that was on Rogan or whatever) who tells you how to thrive in a capitalistic society by acting like a stupid shithead, because they'll only tell you how to ADAPT and not how to truly change and be happy. Philosophers won't either for that matter, but at least they convey more complex things than "hey if you want to earn a lot of money be a dick, or, clean your room to get a feeling of accomplishment" because that's shit that is SO fucking obvious that you knew that already, and if you just put a tiny bit of effort into actually evaluating life you'd figure that out all by yourself. They just want you to buy their books so that they can spend money on coke and hookers.

I don't know what I'm ranting about anymore, but yeah, therapy is nice. It helps YOU figure out YOU, so you'll actually be able to evaluate what makes YOU happy and productive.

We two, we can bitch and complain about "Oh I can't wait to get into gear wihu" but the truth is that we can do that RIGHT fucking now, there ain't no walls stopping us, we could just do it. If you have depression or anxiety that you feel is stopping you, well, then you break the fucking depression with your COCK man, and if you can't swing your dick hard enough to solve that, then get help solving that, so you can go and solve yourself.

Living ain't easy bro, but it's supposed to be being alive, not rotting away in bed living some sort of gloomy ass life as a comatose beetle under a rock (even tho beetles under rocks are alive too and their life has a worth, but you're a monkey man and you should do monkey man shit)
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Isabella Bankinwater - Thu, 10 Jan 2019 21:21:28 EST ID:4bvCr5iw No.528705 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>528682
Shit happens. One month ago, I finished my semester with only 8k debt and hoped to get a real job. Now I am 50k Inna hole because of a wreck I got into when I was drunk. I just know one day it will be over, and I hope the ride there will be fine.
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Cyril Bunlock - Fri, 11 Jan 2019 20:30:37 EST ID:K1RNjacv No.528716 Ignore Report Quick Reply
just want to say this thread is very relatable
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Priscilla Pellerman - Sat, 12 Jan 2019 11:11:50 EST ID:ibXCcm3b No.528729 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>528660
Since New Years Ive been like this too. I dont feel like theres a point to any of this, Ive ridden all my dreams to the end.

>Nothing can save me now, its what I believe, no visions or dreams about you, came true for me

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NJbvSmRuV_w
>>
Cornelius Blackwater - Sat, 12 Jan 2019 22:18:57 EST ID:4Kj1UCJE No.528738 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>528683

hey I liked this post, I think you are on the right track when it comes to your thoughts, you just need to keep thinking the good stuff and ignore the derailing reality.

but are you a dog? your terminology ("treats") and the photo makes me believe you are a dog

or maybe a god
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Ben Cartwright - Sun, 13 Jan 2019 06:35:27 EST ID:hBEhmcBg No.528746 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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>>528738
Well, at the very least you have to try. If you're getting stuck in a ditch, you certainly won't get up by only presuming that this is okay, and that you're not interested in making any effort. And if you're like OP, or myself, you'll eventually be bound to find out that you'd rather be moving. And then it's even more insane to just keep sitting in the car. Understandably it isn't always easy to get unstuck, but then you have to call a professional that can help you get moving again.

You simply have to make a effort. While it's commendable and perhaps somewhat admirable of a leaf to be able to get where it wants without doing anything at all, that understanding only comes from the belief that the leaf is happy with where it's blowing. At least apes have the ability to resist simply drifting without purpose.

Life is undeniably harsh, and sometimes it take a incredibly amount of courage to keep living. Because let's not kid ourselves, staying alive is one of the bravest things to do. But that courage is completely misplaced if it isn't used at anything you find inherently worth living for, then it's just a completely futile drive to keep on being miserable!
It's just basic Kierkegaardian existentialism, because you're bound to feel angst and you're bound to ponder, so you might as well use that energy into doing something you enjoy and find purpose in. It could be basically anything, so just another reason to finding something you enjoy. Haven't found it? Good thing you can just keep on looking, but it requires determination and effort!

It's all just my humble opinion obivously, but I sometimes find that the harsh reality of nature and the scary prospect of existence is the spice, or fabric of happiness. It IS the very thrill of chasing a garbage truck, or the comforting joy of chewing on a cured sausage. I'd just lay around sleeping all day without it. And to be honest, the last seven years I have been doing just that, plus abusing treats.

But I've contacted help, and soon I'll hopefully have the tools and energy to live. But I had to pick up the phone and realize something had to happen, and that wasn't easy for a lot of different reasons.

Woof woof
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Nell Gibbledack - Sun, 13 Jan 2019 20:06:37 EST ID:ux+4Rp+2 No.528753 Ignore Report Quick Reply
Holy shit op that pic is funny as fuck. I love that dudes comics. Did he died?


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