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Kirtaner & Spardot's 420chan Wedding

To all guests, live viewers, and our Internet family, THANK YOU.
VODs will be edited soon, we are all so tired.
Wedding Gifts
That mystic romanticism. by Wesley Grandhall - Wed, 04 Oct 2017 00:04:50 EST ID:+P643Utw No.173680 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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So I'm quitting cigarettes right now and i got most of it under control. Got enough coping mechanism tools in my tool box so to speak. got some nice whiskey to sip on and some nice kush to smoke on to get through the next two weeks of bitchiness.

the only thing i'm having trouble with is that mystic romantic feeling cigs provide. I miss it. =\

It's hard to describe, but like... imagine your visiting a mountain lodge with your family as a teenager. they finally fall asleep in their room and you're in your room. you climb out the window and walk out onto the balcony. the sky is crystal clear and ice cold. ...

The act of sitting on my balcony under the night's sky, looking out over the trees as a cool breeze washes over me, and slowly taking a drag of that most glorious of poisons.

....god i dont know. its like i know its all a load of bullshit i tell myself to justify my addiction and blah blah blah non smokers dont even feel this and the night is beautiful in itself... but....

...but its right here. i feel its beauty.

.... Listening to The Doors' End of the Night in total darkness..

staying up on acid looking at the stars with your best friend until the sun rises.

just..not the same without cigs. you know?

i cant even put my thoughts into words ._. maybe im insane. maybe once i quit smoking i wont be able to access this mystic mental space again.
Matilda Girrynere - Wed, 04 Oct 2017 11:01:18 EST ID:x3uFhVhT No.173681 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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I’m not going to tell you to stop that, but I will tell you you’re wrong.

I too am quitting dip (well snus, I switched to it in hopes of mitigating the health effects, but found that the reason I wanted to quit was indeed nicotine itself, not just the form it comes in). And I understand exactly what you mean. It’s a lie you tell yourself.

I mean, I’ve always known it was, I tell myself the same thing. I’ve had some similar amazing moments with tobacco as the conductor in that train of consciousness. But it’s not actually that, that makes the moment pleasurable.

Sure, it might be the element that makes it *special*, per se. After all, that’s how it exists in your memory. There’s no erasing that, and you shouldn’t; tobacco played a part in your life during that time.

You similarly though, consider the bad times. The reasons you’ve wanted to quit so many times and are finally doing it (maybe, again, not for the first time). And there’s a point where you realize it’s time to move on. You spiritual at all? At some point you’ll have an awakening, and it’ll be significant for you whether or not you’re using tobacco regularly - but I can guarantee the tobacco itself will play the most minimal of roles.

In my life, although I’ve had those romantic moments myself, the role lady baccy has predominantly served in my life is that of self-loathing and insecurity, and the inability to do what I know needs to be done but still won’t do it for reasons completely unknown to myself.

Anyway I can’t redpill you through flowery text. All I’ll suggest to you is that you’re fucking wrong - and that’s not even a bad thing, just funny that you might go even longer while amicably lying to yourself to put off realizing it in its starkness a bit longer.

I hope I myself don’t, though.
Angus Gicklewill - Fri, 06 Oct 2017 10:42:14 EST ID:iQPjrDwx No.173685 Ignore Report Quick Reply
I know its sounds cliche as fuck, but what mostly helped me with this, was meditation.

Some peolpe say jogging in open spaces give this in the now feeling, some say yoga does it, for me its meditation and painting.

What you need to realize, its that the cigarette just worked as an anchor, for you to realize the moment, if you had no cig, you would sit there and get distracted by your thoughts, not realizing the beauty of the moment, but since you have a point of attention, the cig, you easily get in the now.

What you need to find, is more stuff that gives you the in the now, mystic sensation.
Augustus Drundernine - Mon, 23 Oct 2017 21:45:07 EST ID:+P643Utw No.173708 Ignore Report Quick Reply
flowery text helps more than you'd think (:

talking about it withyou helped..

>the role lady baccy has predominantly served in my life is that of self-loathing and insecurity, and the inability to do what I know needs to be done but still won’t do it for reasons completely unknown to myself.

that is fucking 100% true for me. I know exactly that feeling, the self-loathing and insecurity just under the surface, and the inability to get stuff done very very far under the surface... just as true as the mystic romantic feeling, for me at least.

I guess its not worth it to accept all of that as a package deal.

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