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Scenes From A Hat by Blackbelt Jenny - Mon, 16 Apr 2018 19:58:55 EST ID:DXQXl2wW No.4701278 Ignore Report Quick Reply
File: 1523923135664.png -(340067B / 332.10KB, 480x360) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size. 340067
>What you shouldn't say at a border patrol checkpoint
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Jarvis Drammermidge - Mon, 16 Apr 2018 20:02:04 EST ID:gLnaddQ6 No.4701279 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>I'll take "Home addresses of abortion doctors" for $500, Pat.
>>
Aribeth - Mon, 16 Apr 2018 20:08:19 EST ID:OzgNtuRi No.4701285 Ignore Report Quick Reply
"Hola"
>>
Morena Baccarin - Mon, 16 Apr 2018 20:31:41 EST ID:2ph/SgMJ No.4701289 Ignore Report Quick Reply
The gold fringe your flag indicates this is a maritime court.
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FuckMosslelore.sea - Mon, 16 Apr 2018 20:33:51 EST ID:H8eFMnfH No.4701290 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>4701278
>stop oppressing me
>>
Paul Goldsmith - Mon, 16 Apr 2018 20:36:26 EST ID:y8EDOP9M No.4701291 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>4701278
Stay out of the trunk.
>>
Tyler Florence - Mon, 16 Apr 2018 20:56:26 EST ID:U8y2+Piv No.4701301 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>4701278
TRIGGERED
>>
Fritz Zwicky - Tue, 17 Apr 2018 00:34:42 EST ID:sQ4ucURj No.4701391 Ignore Report Quick Reply
good thread OP! great idea. Here is a true story of what I said traveling from Canada to the US thru BC to Washington at the border.

My band was going on tour in the states but it's illegal to sell merch and make money on tour in another country without a visa. So we sent two of my bandmates in the car(they were US citizens.) They sent me on a bus because I am a fuck up. I ended up doing tons of coke the night before and thought that the bus ride I could sleep. It turns out the bus is like a 40 minute drive from Vancouver to the border. I end up getting nervous at the border and go FIRST in line because I thought it would be suspect if I was last in line. I forget the name of my albeit and choke up hard. He asks me why I am going to the states and I say to see a friend in san fran. They say whats his name. I say I forget. Then they ask what he does. I say he is the guy who cleans up dead bodies(this is true but there is a name for it.). The guard literally started laughing at me cause my story was so shitty and waved me thru. No joke. I guess he thought if I was trying to do something sketchy I was really bad at hiding it so I probably wasn't. My band picks me up across the border and we are golden for the rest of the trip.

TL;DR "Im going to see my friend who has no name and cleans up dead bodies and im on coke"
>>
Shôtarô Kaneda - Tue, 17 Apr 2018 01:16:15 EST ID:Mx6kYj07 No.4701402 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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>>4701391

man I had the opposite experience, tired as hell strung out on benadryl coming in from Toronto thru Buffalo to get home... U.S. customs gives me all manner of shit and are terribly rude (not just curt/authoritative etc..). I expected at least some level of trust in a fellow countrymen but oh well.
>>
Kindler Rebecca - Tue, 17 Apr 2018 07:05:57 EST ID:RRdFYVX2 No.4701497 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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>>4701402
The oldest bones found on the continent were Solutreans who came from Europe across the Atlantic thousands of years before Asians crossed the Bering strait. It is why some native Americans have more caucasoid features because of the mixing that followed
>>
Rupert Tacklestock - Tue, 17 Apr 2018 07:32:03 EST ID:XEIqyJ2L No.4701503 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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>>4701497
>The oldest bones found on the continent were those of an MMA podcaster
>>
ErnestCaffingcocke.csv - Tue, 17 Apr 2018 07:57:15 EST ID:VIvGz59R No.4701514 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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>>4701503

Joe Rogan is a genetic throw back

I actually met him before, he was kind of a dick telling me I am not "peaking" or something. We kept going to use the same machines at the Gym and I could see he was getting pissed off. I told him there was another piece of equipment exactly the same but he went off at me saying how he goes there at this time every week and it's his machine. "you fuckin dummy, you dont even use it right" etc. He was talking about how many fighters he knows and how if he wanted he could have me "taught a lesson". It was really surreal actually. His buddy came over and whisked him away to the chrio center or something. Last thing he said was something about chillin in the Chrio. "bro lets hit the chrio, 20 mins in the chrio bro cool you off " He kept saying how he "spa's with the best". He's a fucking weird dude.
>>
Diego Sanchez - Tue, 17 Apr 2018 07:59:55 EST ID:DXQXl2wW No.4701516 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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>The worst thing to say at a funeral
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Fritz Zwicky - Tue, 17 Apr 2018 08:00:19 EST ID:sQ4ucURj No.4701518 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>4701514

sounds very insecure.
>>
Fritz Zwicky - Tue, 17 Apr 2018 08:01:34 EST ID:sQ4ucURj No.4701519 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>4701516

Open the casket! I'm Alive!
>>
Michael Bisping - Tue, 17 Apr 2018 08:13:58 EST ID:ON89zrJ8 No.4701523 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>4701516
Save the fake tears, sweetheart.
>>
Augustus Cole - Tue, 17 Apr 2018 09:27:22 EST ID:kHHR4HEL No.4701548 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>4701516
So what are you doin after this?
>>
David Von Erich - Tue, 17 Apr 2018 10:29:15 EST ID:hbhQMeZV No.4701586 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>4701516
I know that people shit and piss themselves when they die, but I have always wondered if the muscle relaxations also made them splooge.
>>
Smokemoar McTokemoar - Wed, 18 Apr 2018 17:21:38 EST ID:5ZN4hu7f No.4702160 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>4701514
You know, I know, everyone knows that you're lying. You shouldn't be telling lies on the internet.
>>
Kate Mulgrew - Wed, 18 Apr 2018 17:26:02 EST ID:n7r1Vf9B No.4702162 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>4701278
there's definitely not anything illegal going on here officer, sir... ;)
>>
Arthur Eddington - Wed, 18 Apr 2018 17:47:16 EST ID:d81N1T4t No.4702171 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>4701278

dude weed
>>
Elim Garak - Wed, 18 Apr 2018 18:07:21 EST ID:OpfrCSPi No.4702183 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>4701519

That's probably the best thing to say at a funeral. Except if everybody wanted you dead for a fat inheritance.
>>
Krem - Wed, 18 Apr 2018 19:53:16 EST ID:DXQXl2wW No.4702217 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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>The most awful thing to say on a first date
>>
Sidney Suzzlestut - Wed, 18 Apr 2018 20:14:03 EST ID:sQ4ucURj No.4702224 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>4702217

Wanna see my anime collection? We can browse 420chan together while I show you.
>>
RebeccaChucklewill.inf - Wed, 18 Apr 2018 20:28:47 EST ID:tMGPMbnY No.4702226 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>4701278
Yo dawg, you know where I can buy some decent weed in Canada? I just ate my last ounce when we got stuck in the mud trying to cross over at that farmer's back road.

He charged me 50 bucks and wouldn't give it back. Pulled us outta the mud though.
>>
Emperor Kahless - Wed, 18 Apr 2018 20:33:25 EST ID:98RV4nAg No.4702227 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>4702217
"Hi, I'm Kirt."
>>
Christiaan Huygens - Wed, 18 Apr 2018 21:21:06 EST ID:gLnaddQ6 No.4702242 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>4701497
Yeah, the fact the CGI'd white skin on him is concrete evidence that can't be faked.
>>
Emelianenko Fedor - Thu, 19 Apr 2018 21:12:12 EST ID:hIVv8H0d No.4702670 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>4701278 hi jack!


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