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420chan is Getting Overhauled - Changelog/Bug Report/Request Thread (Updated July 10)
possum getting high Ignore Report Reply
Rips McTits - Wed, 10 Jul 2019 07:18:36 EST PQxzm6lY No.4874700
File: 1562757516086.webm [mp4] -(2772835B / 2.64MB, 342x432) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size. 2772835
how do you type the sound it makes
>>
Rips McTits - Wed, 10 Jul 2019 07:19:34 EST PQxzm6lY No.4874701 Ignore Report Reply
sounds like my nose when i blow it
>>
Hydra - Wed, 10 Jul 2019 07:21:55 EST nJkrco7e No.4874702 Ignore Report Reply
i type with my fingers and the sound is a sort of clack-clack
>>
Umawuma Filangey - Wed, 10 Jul 2019 07:40:51 EST NCJVq9kO No.4874703 Ignore Report Reply
I wonder if that kind of possum is all bluff and noise like the kind here, or if will fuck your shit up like it sounds.
>>
Arcade Star Hannah - Wed, 10 Jul 2019 08:04:08 EST I+JI2XiB No.4874708 Ignore Report Reply
>>4874700
would like to see the full vid
I mean what the fuck happened afterwards?
fight flight or high? or high flight? or high fight?
KKKHHhHR
>>
Hamilton Simmerville - Wed, 10 Jul 2019 08:50:02 EST HQONgGlw No.4874714 Ignore Report Reply
PRKHX!
>>
Lucky Shortfoot - Wed, 10 Jul 2019 09:21:59 EST u27gIV8+ No.4874717 Ignore Report Reply
miniaturizations of pikachu but let's out a yoda barf
>>
Rear Admiral Gregory Quinn - Wed, 10 Jul 2019 09:37:39 EST CsDGTzEU No.4874722 Ignore Report Reply
>>4874703
>>4874700

It’s not an opossum. Some sort of lemur family mammal. Probably some BrazilFags 🇧🇷
>>
SimonNemmerbanks.ost - Wed, 10 Jul 2019 11:15:38 EST 5h0NnKL6 No.4874749 Ignore Report Reply
>>4874722
It's not an opossum, it's a possum
>>
Takanori Gomi - Wed, 10 Jul 2019 13:19:14 EST lSOqTgR0 No.4874780 Ignore Report Reply
It sounds like a cough or a sneeze to me.
>>
Mike Russow - Wed, 10 Jul 2019 13:24:12 EST D9OnZzHB No.4874784 Ignore Report Reply
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>>4874749
No. It’s an opossum.

And you’re either retarded or a poor troll.


Probably both
>>
Nada - Wed, 10 Jul 2019 13:25:07 EST HKNlG3Ai No.4874787 Ignore Report Reply
>>4874784
no it's a possum
>>
Rocker Hugh - Wed, 10 Jul 2019 13:53:07 EST ZOXy9b1u No.4874806 Ignore Report Reply
1562781187385.webm [mp4] -(4062619B / 3.87MB, 720x908) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size.
DICKS EVERYWHERE
>>
SimonNemmerbanks.ost - Wed, 10 Jul 2019 13:55:53 EST 5h0NnKL6 No.4874809 Ignore Report Reply
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>>4874784
THAT'S an Opossum
THIS is a Possum

it's Australian for squirrel
>>
PollySishstone.ds - Wed, 10 Jul 2019 14:08:55 EST K/xajSPh No.4874815 Ignore Report Reply
>>4874806
This is so awful but I can't stop laughing
>>
Monica Belluci - Wed, 10 Jul 2019 14:11:39 EST 3MEGQ7k4 No.4874818 Ignore Report Reply
>>4874815
It's not like they forced it to smoke up. I'd say if the chimp wants it, the chimp can have it. At least you can tell if it's consenting. And chimps DO understand drugs. Wild ones eat fermented fruit on purpose to get drunk.
>>
Poké Kid Ebenezer - Wed, 10 Jul 2019 14:37:51 EST SPdooOMC No.4874827 Ignore Report Reply
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>>4874714
Like when you cough the hit but hold it in.
PRKHX! PRKHX!
>>
Dr. Wongburger - Wed, 10 Jul 2019 14:44:37 EST ePBPuvQ3 No.4874831 Ignore Report Reply
>>4874700
I wonder if when scientists made animals get high to study them if they chuckled like this?
>>
Violet Stoolbutter - Wed, 10 Jul 2019 16:22:54 EST egOh+lnb No.4874915 Ignore Report Reply
>>4874806
They are so much like us
>>
Jimny Flod - Wed, 10 Jul 2019 16:35:10 EST JcT1++GB No.4874919 Ignore Report Reply
>>4874806
holy fuck that is awesome

it's not even animal abuse, they were clearly tryna smoke and loving it when they did, they're really not that far away from humans

so cool
>>
Ferran Adrià - Wed, 10 Jul 2019 16:58:13 EST SyJ41SU5 No.4874921 Ignore Report Reply
>>4874919
Theres a reason you don't want to give chimps random drugs though
https://www.cbsnews.com/news/chimp-was-drugged-with-xanax/
>>
Ernest Blytheworth - Wed, 10 Jul 2019 17:25:35 EST di2U2CFB No.4874933 Ignore Report Reply
>>4874815
yo seriously

and how fucking rich do you have to be to just have a random baby chimp around to smoke up because you think it's funny
>>
Leonard McCoy - Wed, 10 Jul 2019 17:35:36 EST vQCPEDej No.4874937 Ignore Report Reply
>>4874933
they always end up ripping somebodys face off it's just a fact of nature
>>
Jesus Hayzeus - Wed, 10 Jul 2019 17:35:46 EST B9upxW92 No.4874938 Ignore Report Reply
>>4874933
could be asia somewhere.
>>
Walter Worthingbanks - Wed, 10 Jul 2019 18:16:30 EST JO53ZZRL No.4874962 Ignore Report Reply
>>4874818
but its just a child chimp, its not very nice thing to do. its gonna have problems when it grows up.
>>
Jenny Nickleman - Wed, 10 Jul 2019 18:29:30 EST 6MEU5ksT No.4874967 Ignore Report Reply
>>4874962
didn't we all
>>
Ernest Blytheworth - Wed, 10 Jul 2019 18:32:39 EST di2U2CFB No.4874970 Ignore Report Reply
>>4874937
I know, for real. You wouldn't catch me in the same room or even building as a goddamn chimpanzee. Even a baby will eat your face off.

Primates are just nothing to fuck with. I knew a guy who knew a guy who knew a veterinarian who said they'd never treat primates because they are all just so goddamn mean for no reason.

That's like four degrees of separation between me and those vicious animals, and I'd like to keep it that way thank you very much.
>>
Walter Worthingbanks - Wed, 10 Jul 2019 18:41:39 EST JO53ZZRL No.4874976 Ignore Report Reply
>>4874970
orangutans though seems chill, i like this vid
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FIxYCDbRGJc
>>
Tom Lawlor - Wed, 10 Jul 2019 18:44:46 EST f+eknXGx No.4874979 Ignore Report Reply
I could take a chimp. Strength doesn't matter if you can use it against them. Let them grab the blade of my sword
>>
Ernest Blytheworth - Wed, 10 Jul 2019 19:25:04 EST di2U2CFB No.4875004 Ignore Report Reply
>>4874976
oh yea dude they're pretty chill

>>4874979
in all reality it probably would and then it'd just beat you to death with whatever is left of its hands
>>
>>
Lwaxana Troi - Fri, 12 Jul 2019 09:36:00 EST onipIxC4 No.4875811 Ignore Report Reply
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>>4874700
Ahwoooogaa
>>
Augustus Hunkinbork - Fri, 12 Jul 2019 09:43:26 EST nJkrco7e No.4875813 Ignore Report Reply
>>4875004
I think with most animals smaller than a person we'd have a good chance if we kicked and kept kicking. Chimps would be tough but most dogs would be pretty fucked up by the heel of a good shoe.
People who wear trainers would be fucked though.
>>
Thomas Henderson - Fri, 12 Jul 2019 10:36:37 EST i+/IM0dL No.4875832 Ignore Report Reply
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>>4875813
Dude do you seriously think you could kick a fucking chimp to death? That fucker would beat you to death with your own leg
>>
Joseph Benavidez - Fri, 12 Jul 2019 11:41:35 EST SyJ41SU5 No.4875851 Ignore Report Reply
>>4875813
You wouldnt stand chances against the chimp. A chimp can deglove you with its bare hands and rip your entire face off. Size is not same thing as power. There are some smaller animals that will absolutely wreck your shit. You underestimate also how sturdy many animals are and how little it matters if you break some ribs kicking them. Case in point wild boar video earlier much smaller than the man who took multiple large round pistol blasts and kept charging. People who think such things always try to fuck bear in cages and it's always funny to watch outcome first minute. After it is often just sad.
>>
Castle Valet Cedric - Fri, 12 Jul 2019 11:59:47 EST tk82ookq No.4875862 Ignore Report Reply
>>4875832
Stealing from the jenk police? Homeboy better watch his back
>>
Robbie Lawler - Fri, 12 Jul 2019 12:10:44 EST Ox+q8AQa No.4875865 Ignore Report Reply
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>>4875851

Ok but hear me out: What if you know... Kung Fu!
>>
Phoebe Subblemudge - Fri, 12 Jul 2019 15:05:35 EST OD9tyQnu No.4875921 Ignore Report Reply
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>>4875865
A chimp is inferior on land and I would argue that jujitsu professionals are vastly superior even in grapling, but my main point is that on land a good kicker with strong legs and a large body mass could destroy a few chimps simultaneously. They simply couldn't get even near him to use their strong hands, and they are so short that they could only reach his legs and their mass is so low that even if they did nothing but block they would just fly. Overall a chimp is no match to pretty much anyone in UFC. I mean they couldn't even deliver proper blows, their fighting style is based more on grabbing than punching. They are fucked against any trained person of 90kg and over.
>>
Alan Guth - Fri, 12 Jul 2019 15:11:07 EST U6Vj8wGv No.4875922 Ignore Report Reply
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>>4874700
>>
Blair Giddytip - Fri, 12 Jul 2019 15:47:21 EST 3MEGQ7k4 No.4875944 Ignore Report Reply
>>4875921
You clearly don't understand that the chimp is grabbing to bite. It has a bite force of 1,200 PSI. It will jump on top of a human with 1 jump and literally BITE THEIR GODDAMN FACE OFF. Shit, it will rip their head off if it wants to. And these things weigh 200 lbs in that tiny package. When it flings itself at the human, the human is going to fall down and get bitten to death.
>>
Phoebe Subblemudge - Fri, 12 Jul 2019 16:22:03 EST OD9tyQnu No.4875971 Ignore Report Reply
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>>4875944
Ok, forgot about biting, so grappling is mostly out of the picture, but they weigh 50kg and they couldn't defend or go around kicks so they are still fucked. Try biting a baseball bat and you will see how effective your jaw is against a flying leg that is targeted at the center of your mass at speeds way too high for you to dodge. Kicks are effective against humans, but chimp's structure, mass, height and lack of heavy enough shielding... They are fucked against a person who knows how to kick effectively and has strong and big legs. Really if that was a thing in mma, it would be just bad... Unless the chimps were smart enough to start catching those legs, but then they don't have the means to prevent a KO before they catch those legs so statistically they would still be fucked.

Do you have any experience with being kicked? When the mass is large enough and the kick is powerful enough, the best you can do is cancel it with your mass and shield from it the best you can and if the opponent is twice your size you can only run because those kicks will go straight through your defences and blow you off balance or knock you out and for chimps it's even worse, they aren't ass able to move their body and head around (land mobility) to dodge the headshot.
>>
Yuna - Fri, 12 Jul 2019 16:27:52 EST 1HxlG3UX No.4875972 Ignore Report Reply
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SKRRRA
PAP PAP KA KA
KA SKIBIDI PAP PAP DOM TOOM
>>
Blair Giddytip - Fri, 12 Jul 2019 17:04:53 EST 3MEGQ7k4 No.4875989 Ignore Report Reply
>>4875971
Chimp are made to jump six feet in the air, and that's how they fight. It's going to jump at your chest, bite your throat out, and shit down the hole. These are wild animals. They fight to kill.

Check out chimpanzee wars. There's a couple tribes that went cannabal and started killing each other for food.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dQn1-mLkIHw
>>
Phoebe Subblemudge - Fri, 12 Jul 2019 17:19:52 EST OD9tyQnu No.4875992 Ignore Report Reply
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>>4875989
They jump by pulling, not by extending. on ground you need legs to jump. they are not nearly as mobile as a person on a flat surface where they need to move on all fours in order to be considered any kind of mobile at all.
>>
Phoebe Subblemudge - Fri, 12 Jul 2019 17:20:41 EST OD9tyQnu No.4875993 Ignore Report Reply
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>>4875972
this is awesome
>>
Esther Weppersatch - Fri, 12 Jul 2019 17:38:18 EST 2vlJjeLy No.4875994 Ignore Report Reply
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>>4875993
>>
Lilith Failburry - Fri, 12 Jul 2019 17:56:46 EST 7Z0Kpg8C No.4876001 Ignore Report Reply
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>>4875992
Alright tough guy arrange a fight between a trained UFC fighter and a chimp I guarenfuckingtee you the chimp will literally kill the guy before he can TKO a chimp like what the fuck are you even thinking
>>
Alan Guth - Fri, 12 Jul 2019 17:58:36 EST U6Vj8wGv No.4876003 Ignore Report Reply
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>mfw I don't know enough about the tensile strength of chimp's cock to refute the chimpologist's arguments
>>
Shitlick McSnifflewitz - Fri, 12 Jul 2019 18:03:44 EST 32u2rsMY No.4876007 Ignore Report Reply
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>>4875992
I don’t think you realize how physically over-engineered a lot of animals are in comparison to us. For their weight chimps can be anywhere from 2 to 6 times stronger than an average human, and their entire bodies are build to back up that potential.
Even down to their bones, which are of greater density than our own. That and their excess of lean muscle and very little fat make it so that chimps don’t even float, bc they are too busy being fucking jacked. You can find videos of chimps walking on the bottom of a swimming pool (I don’t know why that exists but it does..). humans are total doughboys in comparison. They also have large predator-like canines and formidable bite potential.
And then there’s just the factor of the animal ferocity that means it’s not necessarily going to just stop unless you disable it somehow, and if you don’t knock it out with the kick, it’s probably not going to be slowed much if at all, and will be on you in a second and eating off your fingers and genitals.

There’s some cases where people have tried to fend them off to no avail, including the “ Chimp on Xanax” story, where the chimp was stabbed multiple times with a huge kitchen knife and was described as being “emotional but not physically deterred.” He was sad and confused bc his own (adoptive) mommy stabbed him a bunch of times. He then went back on the attack and was shot multiple times before wandering back to his bedroom in the house, where he laid down, clutching his favorite swinging rope, and eventually bled out. It just goes to show that the only real way to kill a chimp is to break its heart (and maybe the bullets to some extent too).
>>
Groundskeeper Boothby - Fri, 12 Jul 2019 18:05:08 EST +K2qVR1X No.4876010 Ignore Report Reply
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>>4876001
the chimp will like reach back and rip his ears off when he tries to rear naked choke the chimper.
>>
Phoebe Subblemudge - Fri, 12 Jul 2019 18:24:24 EST OD9tyQnu No.4876020 Ignore Report Reply
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>>4875994
those jolly african-americans even scat in their native dialect
>>
Phoebe Subblemudge - Fri, 12 Jul 2019 18:34:54 EST OD9tyQnu No.4876028 Ignore Report Reply
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>>4876001
If he kicks accurately into the head the chimp cannot block against that mass moving at that speed, people are able to coordinate much more difficult kicks than a big ass head attached to a torso that is less mobile than a human. lets get real here guys/
>>
FrederickBivingled.pm - Fri, 12 Jul 2019 18:39:07 EST avtI//jG No.4876031 Ignore Report Reply
>>4876007
Yeah humans have tools. Before we evolved into homo sapiens we all had tools. We chuck out feeble specimens en masse because we don't need to be strong and tough, we can save the energy and I dunno? Invent the projectile weapons 70000 years ago maybe?

An unarmed human will die to most animals. That's because an unarmed human is like a defanged declawed and lamed animal.

Our only other strength is we can run a long way without tiring. You see a chimp and if you're in good enough shape to seriously consider martial arts: You run. If you can't get several friends with shortbows or spears with the ability to use them (or guns, guns work) don't even bother. A lot of those predators can outrun us over a short distance though. And also a lot of people aren't in as good shape relative to their potential so you'll probably die. But if you've been practicing your cardio you should at least be able to stay ahead of a chimp.
>>
Brian Craw - Fri, 12 Jul 2019 18:51:42 EST di2U2CFB No.4876039 Ignore Report Reply
Listen folks, to give you an idea of how powerful chimpanzees are: the average chimpanzee can sprint at 25 miles an hour. That's just an average chimp. The WORLD'S FASTEST SPRINTER, Usain Bolt, runs at a maximum of 28 miles an hour.

He is at PEAK human condition, and is still only marginally faster than the average chimp. Sure, chimps can't maintain that speed for long. But they have such explosive force naturally that they can compete with top human athletes like it is fucking nothing.

Literally the only human being in the world who would stand a chance against a one-on-one, hand-to-hand fight with a goddamn chimpanzee would be Bruce Lee. Not even because he has the strength to do it, but because he has the speed and skill to get the absolute fuck out of the way of a rampaging chimpanzee.

Bodybuilders would get ripped to shreds. Boxers would get ripped to shreds. UFC fighters would get ripped to shreds. Anyone trying to grapple with the chimp would literally get their chest ripped open and their testicles bitten off.

Literally only Shaolin monk level humans, training their entire lives to fight, would even have any kind of chance. And it would probably involve blocking and deflecting blows that would absolutely send shattering waves of force through your entire body.
>>
Brian Craw - Fri, 12 Jul 2019 18:55:43 EST di2U2CFB No.4876042 Ignore Report Reply
>>4876031
This guy has it right.

Humans can only compete with these animals by running up in gangs, pelting them to death with rocks/arrows/spears and then sprinting the fuck away before any more animals show up.

Tool use is our saving grace. We traded explosive primate strength for the ability to manipulate objects around us dexterously without retard flinging every useful resource 50 feet away with our dumbass chimp might.

We traded that strength for accuracy, and accuracy combined with ranged weapons kills.
>>
Robbie Lawler - Fri, 12 Jul 2019 19:09:47 EST Ox+q8AQa No.4876049 Ignore Report Reply
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>>4875989
Starting to think Argumentum ad Naturam might not actually be a fallacy.
>>
Alan Guth - Fri, 12 Jul 2019 19:16:05 EST U6Vj8wGv No.4876051 Ignore Report Reply
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>>4876042
>retard flinging every useful resource 50 feet away with our dumbass chimp might
>>
Phoebe Subblemudge - Fri, 12 Jul 2019 19:33:56 EST OD9tyQnu No.4876056 Ignore Report Reply
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>>4876039
oh, hi there person who has never done any martial arts.
>>
Scott Steiner - Fri, 12 Jul 2019 20:00:32 EST suZvMXu5 No.4876065 Ignore Report Reply
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>>4876056
Oh yeah did Master Dave teach how to defend against fucking chimpanzees during your weekend taekwondo classes? Just accept a chimp will kill any human hand to hand dude your arguments are retarded
>>
Hex Maniac James - Fri, 12 Jul 2019 20:20:35 EST OD9tyQnu No.4876066 Ignore Report Reply
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>>4876065
its just the way he spoke...
>>
Fanny Craddock - Fri, 12 Jul 2019 20:46:01 EST HNV7NveR No.4876076 Ignore Report Reply
>>4876056
I'm not a fan of joe rogan, but he definitely knows a thing or two about martial arts, and he's terrified of chimps.

>If he kicks accurately into the head the chimp cannot block against that mass moving at that speed, people are able to coordinate much more difficult kicks than a big ass head attached to a torso that is less mobile than a human. lets get real here guys/
Just read this, and think about how comparable chimps and humans are.
>>
>>
Hex Maniac James - Fri, 12 Jul 2019 20:51:39 EST OD9tyQnu No.4876077 Ignore Report Reply
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>>4876076
rightly so

a KO hit to the head is a KO hit to the head tho and chimps have lighter heads that are easier to hit. even just stunning for a few seconds would be enough, but keeping in mind they are lighter an instant kill is even more likely than a human.
>>
Matilda Wommerstone - Fri, 12 Jul 2019 22:43:53 EST di2U2CFB No.4876115 Ignore Report Reply
>>4876066
>it's just the way he spoke very confidently about the fact that chimps will kill you easily and then rape your corpse

come on man
if anything, I overestimated how well Bruce Lee or a Shaolin monk would fair against a chimpanzee
>>
Sailor Alice - Fri, 12 Jul 2019 22:48:23 EST rmZ7XUyp No.4876119 Ignore Report Reply
>>4874700
What if you fight a baby chimp?
>>
Matilda Wommerstone - Fri, 12 Jul 2019 22:49:47 EST di2U2CFB No.4876120 Ignore Report Reply
>>4876119
No fuck that, even then it'll fuck you up to the point that you are permanently crippled. You are losing fingers. You are losing an eye. You are losing a nose.

Don't be messin' around with no chimps, chillun. That's what ol' lady Malberry used to tell us.
>>
Sailor Alice - Fri, 12 Jul 2019 22:50:36 EST rmZ7XUyp No.4876121 Ignore Report Reply
>>4876120
They're so cute though...
>>
Sailor Alice - Fri, 12 Jul 2019 22:51:18 EST rmZ7XUyp No.4876122 Ignore Report Reply
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>>4876121
look
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Matilda Wommerstone - Fri, 12 Jul 2019 22:51:54 EST di2U2CFB No.4876123 Ignore Report Reply
>>4876121
Then why would you even want to fight them? If you win the fight, all you've done is kill an endangered baby animal.

There ain't no good to be found around no chimps, I'm tellin' you boys, stay away from them chimps!
>>
Matilda Wommerstone - Fri, 12 Jul 2019 22:53:40 EST di2U2CFB No.4876125 Ignore Report Reply
>>4876122
okay maybe that one is still innocent and helpless enough to easily kill, but anything larger and you're pushing your luck
>>
Sailor Alice - Fri, 12 Jul 2019 22:53:57 EST rmZ7XUyp No.4876126 Ignore Report Reply
>>4876123
Got me there. I don't think I could,... yet.
>>
Hex Maniac James - Sat, 13 Jul 2019 03:50:01 EST OD9tyQnu No.4876240 Ignore Report Reply
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>>4876115
I was still right about you not having much or any sparring experience.... Wasn't I?
>>
Roll Fizzlebeef - Sat, 13 Jul 2019 05:49:43 EST 2w/wczdf No.4876259 Ignore Report Reply
>>4876077
Humans are easier to knock out than most animals. The point of going unconscious is to survive another day against a superior opponent that doesn't want to eat you. Its not just something that happens if you get a tap on the head. Animals don't usually get that benefit. If they get knocked out
>>
Gerard Kuiper - Sat, 13 Jul 2019 07:05:37 EST 32u2rsMY No.4876268 Ignore Report Reply
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>feelin cute, might turn this doggo inside-out later idk lol
>>
Sage Archie - Sat, 13 Jul 2019 07:17:02 EST nJkrco7e No.4876269 Ignore Report Reply
>>4876259
>Humans are easier to knock out than most animals. The point of going unconscious is to survive another day against a superior opponent that doesn't want to eat you.
>Animals don't usually get that benefit. If they get knocked out
What? Why would a person be less likely to be eaten than an animal? Being knocked out isn't just another level of playing possum*.

*before you claim that possums do it, they pretend to be dead before the predator sees them, old meat isn't as edible as a fresh kill
>>
Matilda Wommerstone - Sat, 13 Jul 2019 09:14:15 EST di2U2CFB No.4876286 Ignore Report Reply
>>4876269
people faint also, and that works to make predators leave

"play dead" is a strategy that works against big cats and bear sometimes too

Not chimps though, they see through your rouse and rip you open and fling your limbs around because of their chimp rage. The catch is that even if you really were dead, they'd rip you open and fling your limbs around anyways

>>OD9tyQnu
No, actually, and i have a super cool, non-ripped-open-and-flung-about girlfriend too
>>
Hex Maniac James - Sat, 13 Jul 2019 11:24:56 EST OD9tyQnu No.4876332 Ignore Report Reply
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>>4876259
The point was about the G forces on the brain. If your head is much lighter your brain will experience much higher acceleration and thus more likelihood for a KO.
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Matilda Wommerstone - Sat, 13 Jul 2019 12:42:51 EST di2U2CFB No.4876346 Ignore Report Reply
>>4876332
Okay but chimp skulls are hard as fuck and basically fused to their spine, on top of being cemented into place by the slabs of thick, corded steel that they have instead of muscles

I don't think a human punch is going to rock a chimp at all
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Gerard Kuiper - Sat, 13 Jul 2019 13:03:29 EST 32u2rsMY No.4876352 Ignore Report Reply
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get rekt humans

good luck trying to kick this guys neck off and then getting casually eaten
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Randy Marsh - Sat, 13 Jul 2019 13:06:16 EST egOh+lnb No.4876353 Ignore Report Reply
>>4876352
>do you even lift bro?
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Thwomp - Sat, 13 Jul 2019 13:35:32 EST Ox+q8AQa No.4876363 Ignore Report Reply
>>4876352
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w98mem4FVQ0

tl;dr where chimps have brute strength, they lack in fine motor skills. So Kung-Fu might actually help in a physical confrontation with a chimp.
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Frederick Seshgold - Sat, 13 Jul 2019 13:43:00 EST tDk6e3uy No.4876367 Ignore Report Reply
>>4876352
I haven't been following this thread but I feel like I can just shoot it with a gun, why do you all have to complicate things?
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Matilda Wommerstone - Sat, 13 Jul 2019 13:59:35 EST di2U2CFB No.4876372 Ignore Report Reply
>>4876363
Only to a certain degree. Fine motor skills won't help you when locked in a 10x10 room with a gorilla. Or a bear. Or an elephant.

There is something to be said for raw, brute strength, which chimps have in spades. Like sure, they have less control over their muscles, but they still have enough control to tear our your eyes and rip off your balls, specifically. You don't need to delicately apply dexterity in order to fucking slaughter someone.

I think a Shaolin master could maybe take on a chimp, but in my opinion the odds would still be in the chimp's favor
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Nick Tatopoulus - Sat, 13 Jul 2019 14:04:28 EST nUMIgVMt No.4876374 Ignore Report Reply
>>4876372
I'd like to see one human vs one chimp in like a ring>>4876372
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Matilda Wommerstone - Sat, 13 Jul 2019 14:04:42 EST di2U2CFB No.4876376 Ignore Report Reply
>>4876367
But what if you don't HAVE a gun. What if you are living a nightmare where you're walking in a jungle and chimp comes out of fucking nowhere and you have to fight it. What if we are living in Hell right now and you have to do that. WHAT IF; that is the terrible question
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Frederick Seshgold - Sat, 13 Jul 2019 14:13:46 EST tDk6e3uy No.4876381 Ignore Report Reply
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>>4876376
Damn thinking about it that way changes everything. I just hope that when I go a post rock band will also use the 911 call as a backing to a song
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Gentleman Fuck - Sat, 13 Jul 2019 14:22:38 EST Wfn0HYWR No.4876383 Ignore Report Reply
>>4876376
I still think one hunky man could take on one midsized chimp
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Gerard Kuiper - Sat, 13 Jul 2019 14:37:05 EST 32u2rsMY No.4876390 Ignore Report Reply
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>>4876376
Or if one day you walk into your kitchen and see a bunch of baby chimps playing with your pots and pans and you yell at them, and then turn around and there is a full adult chimp ready to wax that ass

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=90RfaW_EI_I
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Marcel Boulestin - Sat, 13 Jul 2019 17:15:53 EST irUxi84z No.4876483 Ignore Report Reply
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>>4876376
>>4876383
Gentleman Fuck, you are talking to an 18 y/o senior who has never had any hands on fighting experience and doesn't understand simple mechanics of the fight which comes only from experience. Sparring for some 50 1 hour sessions is enough to learn more than 10 years of phd studying of fighting.

Simply put, any 90+ kilo ufc fighter can kick a chimp in the head and it will be at the very least stunned for a few seconds which is enough to get another kick in the head and once it's out, a good kick to the head will kill the chimp(lighter head) and that's the end of it. Also they weigh 50 kg and there is no way they can stop a fast moving massive leg going at their head.

This whole shaolin stuff simply means he makes his deductions from hollywood movies rather than field research or experience. There is a reason ufc and similar leagues have weight categories. 70 kg man even if he is the greatest fighter in the world would be mostly helpless against any professional fighter who is 110kg. And no man or animal no matter how strong their scull can avoid the consequences of huge and sudden g forces on the brain. You guys are retarded and watch too many movies or are just trolling in which case I would say you are rather unimaginative trolls.

thread/

That plus chimps are stupid and wouldn't be able to predict a human's fighting style like humans can predict other humans

Pic related it's a bunch of fake titties like your knowledge about fighting
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Space Invader - Sat, 13 Jul 2019 17:21:51 EST U6Vj8wGv No.4876484 Ignore Report Reply
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>>4876483
>it's a chimp psyop to trick us into thinking we can fight them hand-to-hand in the chimpocalypse
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Frederick Seshgold - Sat, 13 Jul 2019 17:32:27 EST tDk6e3uy No.4876487 Ignore Report Reply
>>4876483
I'm pretty sure I can kick an unsuspecting human in the head, doesn't mean I'm stronger than them
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EdwinNublingfield.pak - Sat, 13 Jul 2019 17:34:39 EST i+/IM0dL No.4876488 Ignore Report Reply
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>>4876483
Nice try primate
Everyone practice kung fu its their only weakness!
>>
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EdwinNublingfield.pak - Sat, 13 Jul 2019 17:36:17 EST i+/IM0dL No.4876489 Ignore Report Reply
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>>4876488
I am so sorry did not realize that old ass gif was that fast nb
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Matilda Wommerstone - Sat, 13 Jul 2019 17:42:44 EST di2U2CFB No.4876490 Ignore Report Reply
>>4876483
>chimp detected
The only thing lower are phoneposters

The only reason why humans have weight categories in fighting has to do with how size converts to strength. Chimps are like 5 times stronger than people. They might be smaller, but so is a statue made out of stone, and you're going to have trouble as a human punching one of those

those are the fakest tits I've ever seen fuck off back to your deforested jungles
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Space Invader - Sat, 13 Jul 2019 17:43:36 EST U6Vj8wGv No.4876491 Ignore Report Reply
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>>4876488
>>4876489
>tfw the vortex ensnares you
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Marcel Boulestin - Sat, 13 Jul 2019 17:50:29 EST irUxi84z No.4876492 Ignore Report Reply
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>>4876490
Yeah altho these tits fail in comparison to how fake you are as a fighting authority. No it's not only strength, it's also mass of the hits and the mass of defense. Have you ever seen a very fast car hit an 18 wheeler? Chimps can't even hit in the first place. Have you ever seen a chimp fight? they are worse than a K9 and a human can KO a K9 of 40 kg any day of the week. K9s are pretty good on land chimps are sheite. I'm glad you guys are still trying to refute this, but the God has spoken - chimps have no chance against even the obesest of humans.
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Matilda Wommerstone - Sat, 13 Jul 2019 17:58:53 EST di2U2CFB No.4876495 Ignore Report Reply
>>4876492
people get mauled to death all the time by dogs that weigh far less than they do

>fuck off you goddamn chimp psyop
>OOK OOK OOK

I bet you only barely have a concept of a self separate from the environment LOL
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Space Invader - Sat, 13 Jul 2019 18:05:23 EST U6Vj8wGv No.4876500 Ignore Report Reply
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>>4876492
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Frederick Seshgold - Sat, 13 Jul 2019 18:21:11 EST tDk6e3uy No.4876515 Ignore Report Reply
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>>4876500
I AM DONE WITH THIS WEBSITE
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Marcel Boulestin - Sat, 13 Jul 2019 18:37:24 EST irUxi84z No.4876527 Ignore Report Reply
>>4876495
Yeah, because most of those people are drunk, remember that.
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Johann Encke - Sat, 13 Jul 2019 18:44:09 EST sVlGi/lg No.4876540 Ignore Report Reply
man, I wish I was a millionaire so I could get into those clubs where they pit poor people against monkeys in death matches for their own entertainment. Then I would know the answer to this debate definitively.
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Space Invader - Sat, 13 Jul 2019 18:50:11 EST U6Vj8wGv No.4876544 Ignore Report Reply
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>>4876540
Poor people don't know how to kick, you fool. You'd be dead in a moment in man on chimp combat.
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Frederick Seshgold - Sat, 13 Jul 2019 18:53:36 EST tDk6e3uy No.4876545 Ignore Report Reply
>>4876544
>man on chimp
Dude I just thought of the most brilliant idea; gorilla rodeo
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Ben Dover - Sat, 13 Jul 2019 19:03:38 EST f2MYN5Vt No.4876551 Ignore Report Reply
>>4876492
> Chimps can't even hit in the first place.
> Have you ever seen a chimp fight? they are worse than a K9
Have you ever seen a "K9" hit?

Why do you keep saying "K9"? Is it to make it sound like you know what you're talking about?
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Marcel Boulestin - Sat, 13 Jul 2019 19:13:35 EST irUxi84z No.4876559 Ignore Report Reply
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>>4876551
what would you prefer a poodle? K9s have huge teeth that are strong enough to bite your hits through and through you peasant.
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Matilda Wommerstone - Sat, 13 Jul 2019 19:18:20 EST di2U2CFB No.4876561 Ignore Report Reply
>>4876559
"dog" is a pretty good word

too hard for your meaty over-powerful chimp fingers to type?
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Dr. Yuris - Sat, 13 Jul 2019 19:23:44 EST u27gIV8+ No.4876563 Ignore Report Reply
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K9 m8
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Rocket Grunt Cornelius - Sat, 13 Jul 2019 23:14:30 EST SyJ41SU5 No.4876723 Ignore Report Reply
>>4876332
This picture is an excellent test of how much of a druggie you really are, especially if it's the very first thing you see
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Bob Blunton - Sat, 13 Jul 2019 23:37:37 EST HKNlG3Ai No.4876753 Ignore Report Reply
>>4876723
wat
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Rocket Grunt Cornelius - Sat, 13 Jul 2019 23:58:03 EST SyJ41SU5 No.4876789 Ignore Report Reply
>>4876753
Definitely NOT druggie detected
Click thumbnail and stare at picture a little longer.
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Man Davushka - Sun, 14 Jul 2019 00:00:43 EST rmZ7XUyp No.4876792 Ignore Report Reply
>>4876789
The K?
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Rocket Grunt Cornelius - Sun, 14 Jul 2019 00:04:39 EST SyJ41SU5 No.4876799 Ignore Report Reply
>>4876792
A winner is you if you know why
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Man Davushka - Sun, 14 Jul 2019 00:06:04 EST rmZ7XUyp No.4876801 Ignore Report Reply
>>4876799
Klonopin or ketamine.
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Rocket Grunt Cornelius - Sun, 14 Jul 2019 00:25:09 EST SyJ41SU5 No.4876818 Ignore Report Reply
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>>4876801
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Man Davushka - Sun, 14 Jul 2019 00:30:35 EST rmZ7XUyp No.4876820 Ignore Report Reply
>>4876818
lol, I think it's a different K. I dunno though, I did generic shit.
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Eugene Pemmerville - Sun, 14 Jul 2019 00:36:45 EST /+OXZY3d No.4876823 Ignore Report Reply
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>>4876820
oh you did clonkapons
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Kira Nerys - Sun, 14 Jul 2019 00:39:56 EST jx2DliDy No.4876824 Ignore Report Reply
>>4876823
My dad and I found two deer carcasses like that once. I guess they got in a fight, tangled up, and died of starvation or coyote attack.

We kept the skulls locked together and hung them up in the barn.
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Richard Dicks - Sun, 14 Jul 2019 00:59:16 EST yUwOsz8/ No.4876833 Ignore Report Reply
>>4876823
This thing must spend the rest of his life looking straight into the face of his slain enemy.

Metal as fuck.
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Viktor Ambartsumian - Sun, 14 Jul 2019 01:10:23 EST 0v//bT/6 No.4876837 Ignore Report Reply
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>>4876833


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