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Considering stopping transition by Thomas Bladgegold - Thu, 29 Dec 2016 15:08:52 EST ID:elj720lI No.401598 Ignore Report Quick Reply
File: 1483042132514.gif -(997029B / 973.66KB, 500x586) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size. 997029
Hi all. I'm about 3 months into HRT. I've noticed that I'm more comfortable with myself now and just generally happier.

However, I'm at the point of no return involving permanent changes by the HRT, and I don't think I can keep going. I've always felt I'll be socially happier as female, but I don't want to spend all my time worrying about passing and everything.

HRT lets me view maleness as it is-- there's nothing inherently wrong with it to me anymore. I could still be a cute femboy and probably be reasonably happy, if a bit too experimental with drugs.

I've looked at masectomy scars. and they're scary. If I somehow lose confidence like I do now further down the line, I'd be all scarred up.

Like, I was never happy as a male, but I'm still not amazingly happy. The world is the same, I can just express myself a little more freely. And people seem more drawn to my presence because I'm more confident in myself.

But. I look at pictures of cute male characters I like, and I think "wow I can still be like that if I stop now" whereas before I'd look at females and be like "wow I can be like that if I transition."

What's wrong with me, eh? Can anyone help? :/ I've known I was trans for years, but now that I'm transitioning, I don't know.
>>
Thomas Bladgegold - Thu, 29 Dec 2016 15:11:26 EST ID:elj720lI No.401599 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>401598
nb edit: I desparately want to be able to be happy as male and not risk permanently changing myself, but people say HRT takes the dysphoria away and that it'll come back if I stop. I'm just unsure about boobs. Like, I wish I could just be a cute guy and be happy. I always felt like a woman though and now when comparing myself to female characters it's like "oh yeah I could look like that cause it's similar to who I am" but then I look at males and I think "well I'm already that, and there's charm to that too, so I should just stop and be happy with what I have and not risk disfiguring myself"

:/
>>
Alice Sumblepudging - Thu, 29 Dec 2016 19:25:31 EST ID:W33OzG35 No.401603 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>401598
>I wish I could just be a cute guy and be happy

Im not going to tell you to continue or stop transition. But read over your post again, it doesnt seem much like you identify as female. It seems you want to be a cute person regardless of gender, you want to be attractive and be desirable, which there is nothing wrong with that. Its incredibly common for people to want to be "the pretty person".

But you must evaluate yourself, dont let anybody tell you who you are, this is something you need to figure out for yourself.
Its okay to stop transition, but its okay to continue transition, at the end of the day its what makes you happy and why you transitioned to begin with.

My current rhetoric on this board has been one of self acceptance, one of look in the mirror, thats you. thats who you are, its up to you to decide if you're a man or a woman, dont let your traits or things you like make you choose either way, if you like pink, it doesnt make you a girl, if you like race cars and skateboards it doesnt make you a boy.
Plenty of guys like makeup and getting dressed up in outrageous outfits and dont think they are women, plenty of women like wearing shorts and no makeup and dont think they are men.

If you can live your life as your "assigned" gender, then honestly, do it. People transition because they cant live as their assigned gender, and who knows, maybe thats you too, maybe you've transitioned and because you're receiving a proper dose of hormones you're realising that hey, i kinda liked being a guy, maybe i could make a go of it.

Maybe you're just feeling anxiety based on the prospects of the future you see as you being a transwoman.

But, just go look in the mirror, who are you? are you a man or a woman? and how does that realisation make you feel?

Hope this has helped you in some way.
>>
David Brunkinsot - Thu, 29 Dec 2016 23:32:48 EST ID:elj720lI No.401605 Ignore Report Quick Reply
1483072368694.jpg -(89676B / 87.57KB, 720x1280) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size.
>>401603
I look in the mirror and I see a girl that looks unfortuntely like a boy. I think there is anxiety about my future as a transwoman, the whole passing idea... some friends say I look pretty girly but idk if they're lying to appease me.

I don't know. Here's me after 3 months-- I dunno how to trim my eyebrows and my hair fucking sucks due to years of headphones and bad haircuts
>>
Beatrice Brackleham - Fri, 30 Dec 2016 02:23:17 EST ID:6N/PdF0p No.401606 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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>>401605
Yes you look like a boy but the problem all of these girls look like boys at some point.
Its understandable to want to detransition so you dont end up a man who is desperately trying to fit into the fucked female paradigm that society expects.
That's natural.
>>
Fuck Droshham - Fri, 30 Dec 2016 03:26:24 EST ID:D4TP60Hi No.401607 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>401605
You do look girly. You can either put the finishing touches on that or you can go back to boy mode. There are plenty of guys who will want to be with a feminine guy. And if thats what you are thats fine and if you're going to transition you can as well.

My personal opinion is its wrong to just preach to you do this one thing. Do which of the two you're more comfortable with. You look fairly young still so if you got off of hrt and really wanted to go back couldn't you? Just do what's most comfortable. No easy wipe away answer on this.
>>
Beatrice Brackleham - Fri, 30 Dec 2016 08:36:04 EST ID:6N/PdF0p No.401613 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>401607
>>401598
Im going to detransition now OP.
Thanks.
>>
David Brunkinsot - Fri, 30 Dec 2016 12:02:14 EST ID:elj720lI No.401614 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>401613
Mind telling me more? I still don't know, personally. I think if I stop I'll just go right back to envying females, and if I don't stop, well the depression is a little easier to deal with...
>>
Beatrice Brackleham - Fri, 30 Dec 2016 15:07:44 EST ID:6N/PdF0p No.401616 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>401614
Is rather just be gay.
I can always be femme.
Shit I can always put on makeup and stay lean.
>>
David Brunkinsot - Fri, 30 Dec 2016 17:11:23 EST ID:elj720lI No.401618 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>401616
Yeah true. It's nice that you know what you want. I know what I want... or I thought I did. Honestly, as I get older (I'm only 20) life just gets more and more complicated... I don't like making these choices that will permanently affect my life.
>>
Shit Mandlewog - Fri, 30 Dec 2016 23:36:30 EST ID:6N/PdF0p No.401619 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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>>401618
I think I will be very pretty without taking spiro and estrofem everyday.
In all honesty its just a matter of taking care of yourself.
Id rather run a complicated workout routine.
Id rather spend too much time doing my hair.
Id rather eat a super disciplined diet.
Id rather spend too much money on skincare.
Id rather drink a gallon of water everyday.
etc
>>
Eliza Derringwidge - Sat, 31 Dec 2016 01:35:28 EST ID:W33OzG35 No.401620 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>401619

i love the bit about BPA and anti bacterial hand sanitiser.
>>
Walter Covingbanks - Sat, 31 Dec 2016 19:59:40 EST ID:6E9PCkqh No.401625 Ignore Report Quick Reply
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>>401620
Tbh I like Purell. Idk what sort of things come in BPA lined containers but Im sure I like some of those aswell.
>>
George Geshhood - Sat, 31 Dec 2016 20:15:36 EST ID:W33OzG35 No.401626 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>401625

hmm yess i quite enjoy myself a nice sunny afternoon sat down with a nice decanter of purell myself, i do however enjoy the dentistry flavourings of the Dettol brand from time to time also.

When it comes to BPA i quite enjoy cheap bottled water which has sat in the sun for atleast 2 days, you really get the stagnate taste with it which leaves legs down your throat which allows you to not only develop size DD breasts, but also has a good legs to mildly chuckle about with your friends.
>>
Jenny Sushsuck - Sat, 31 Dec 2016 22:08:45 EST ID:/G0x0+XE No.401627 Ignore Report Quick Reply
1483240125652.jpg -(37532B / 36.65KB, 620x349) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size.
>>401626
>I'll just go right back to envying females
I don't know why you would envy females. Just because society gives them privilege doesn't mean you should envy them. I mean women are admirable in many ways but not in such a way that you should envy them just because you are a feminine spirit in a male body.

>hmm yess i quite enjoy myself a nice sunny afternoon sat down with a nice decanter of purell myself, i do however enjoy the dentistry flavourings of the Dettol brand from time to time also.
That Purell is like a fine mint.

>When it comes to BPA i quite enjoy cheap bottled water which has sat in the sun for atleast 2 days, you really get the stagnate taste with it which leaves legs down your throat which allows you to not only develop size DD breasts, but also has a good legs to mildly chuckle about with your friends.

I might have to try that with a fine bottle of Vitamin Water. Aged for a week in the Mojave sun.

pic related suddenly he becomes and enviable female
>>
George Geshhood - Sun, 01 Jan 2017 08:44:47 EST ID:W33OzG35 No.401628 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>401627

I got nothing else but just wanted to say that i enjoyed your post very much so.
>>
Jarvis Blebblelog - Sun, 01 Jan 2017 15:11:04 EST ID:ArWn3v57 No.401629 Ignore Report Quick Reply
1483301464335.png -(1120156B / 1.07MB, 862x643) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size.
>>401628
Thank You I try to be a quality poster. Though sometimes I fail.

>>401619
>>401618
>I don't like making these choices that will permanently affect my life.
I completely agree. I would have transitioned younger but it didnt work out that way for me. However that's not everything, as much as people bitch about Caitlyn Jenner Id say she is proof that a late transitioner can look decent when you throw money at the problem.

Also I think technology is going to get better. The meds they prescribe are ancient they've been used for over forty years. Theyre also hard as hell on your body. So Im sort of hoping that technology will get better. Until then Im going to try to do my own thing.

https://librepathology.org/wiki/Spironolactone_bodies>>401628
>>
Hun Solo - Tue, 10 Jan 2017 20:13:59 EST ID:5Ibpikxy No.401718 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>401605
> I look pretty girly
Bruh...
This better be a pre-transition pic where you having fun cosplaying as Hitler. and not a recent pic
>>
Hun Solo - Tue, 10 Jan 2017 20:19:57 EST ID:5Ibpikxy No.401719 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>401619
>Use lots of anti-bacterial sanitizer
Oh boy. This is how super enhanced MRSA was created tbh.

R.I.P. humanity.
>>
Ian Suzzleshit - Wed, 11 Jan 2017 12:45:23 EST ID:elj720lI No.401732 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>401718
Why do you say that?
>>
John Trotway - Thu, 12 Jan 2017 04:53:08 EST ID:2IbZEiEJ No.401752 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>401629
Bicalutamide is sort of a new viable alternative to spiro and cypro.
I started taking it and reduced my spiro dose (with plans to eventually cut it altogether after getting another blood test to check). It seems to be working well and supposedly blocks a lot more the testosterone than the other drugs.

Also I started sublingualing my estrogen, although it's valerate I think it still helps by avoiding the stomach acid/digestive system and going straight into the bloodstream.

One thing people seem to neglect nowadays is that estrogen is pretty important/effective for reducing testosterone. So don't skimp on the estrogen lol. Take a decent amount and sublingual it.
>>
Albert Brookhall - Thu, 12 Jan 2017 12:09:51 EST ID:jezGytv+ No.401753 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>401752
>Bicalutamide
Can it be prescribed in the United States?
>>
MarleyWarley - Thu, 19 Jan 2017 01:42:19 EST ID:I3iq55gU No.401854 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>401598
You was never trans to begin with
>>
John Cruvingman - Thu, 19 Jan 2017 19:42:06 EST ID:9Z+nhH7v No.401890 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>401854
What makes you say that? I feel infinitely better when taking steps forward in transition (ie HRT) and seeing the femininity in my face and such increase. Stopping the meds and giving up makes me feel awful and like I'm reverting back to the sheltered closeted me.
>>
Thomas Pollerwell - Fri, 20 Jan 2017 07:57:11 EST ID:2IbZEiEJ No.401931 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>401753
I dunno I self med and I don't live in the US.
>>
Clara Murdstone - Fri, 20 Jan 2017 21:03:06 EST ID:xPU30yn/ No.401959 Ignore Report Quick Reply
>>401931
I have to see if I can get it.
I hate spironolactone.


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