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- Thu, 29 Aug 2019 12:41:16 EST y3iVkTbX No.282517
File: 1567096876090.jpg -(1662909B / 1.59MB, 3264x2448) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size. Tests
Does homemade hooch with fruit come up in etg tests?

Asking for a friend
4 posts omitted. Click View Thread to read.
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John Somblesit - Thu, 29 Aug 2019 19:18:21 EST 6GBumJHS No.282526 Reply
>>282523
Like pineapple and orange juice? Like prison hooch. Would that come up?
>>
Alice Gaddlewodging - Fri, 30 Aug 2019 08:16:42 EST pyf9nQ/Y No.282533 Reply
>>282526
>will alcohol show up on an alcohol test?

no fucking shit, you have to be a troll but your troll still succeeds in making me want to break your kneecaps nb
>>
Jenny Snodhood - Tue, 03 Sep 2019 22:59:46 EST 9QBBnhFL No.282560 Reply
>will alcohol show up in alcohol tests
>asking for a friend

Troll savant or just very... "Special", of mind?

tolerances, habits, bibbing, bubbing

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- Tue, 27 Aug 2019 00:39:13 EST UUET0Y6X No.282495
File: 1566880753606.jpg -(98435B / 96.13KB, 400x400) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size. tolerances, habits, bibbing, bubbing
Do you drink daily or monthly? You abstaining or rampantly drunk? What do you drink, how do you drink it, why do you drink it? How long's your habit been with you? How's your health?

I generally try to drink daily, get significant cravings for booze if I go even a few days without. Need to take a break, smoke more good dope. Very inclined to all day drinking because of the nature of my profession, can easily pound down 24 8% cans or like 1.5 fifths a day if I'm enjoying myself. Generally 1/3rd of that when working.

I drive drunk :) worst I ever did was misjudge how badly a city had cleared ice from an offramp, tokyo drifted my shit right past a massive highway lightpole at 60mph and down a 70ft snowy slope. Slid to a fucking halt at the bottom (did not spill my rum and coke.)

Finished the rum and coke, made sure no pigs were coming to "aid" me, shoveled almost 200ft of snow from 200ft of snow covered grass to make it up the incline and back onto the offramp. This was after work.

Been an alcoholic for like 6 years now, spent almost 300k in today's prices bitcoin on all kinds of booze. Biggest mistake of my life! Lol shoulda mined crypto in 2010 bitch ahahah.

I'm thirsty all the time when I'm hungover, which is usually all the time. At least I only drink water to refresh my shit. Hangovers are shit, only withdrawal symptoms I've had so far are light DTs.
>>
Graham Gollerchug - Wed, 28 Aug 2019 22:35:13 EST q5dps35Z No.282513 Reply
>>282495
>worst I ever did was misjudge how badly a city had cleared ice from an offramp, tokyo drifted my shit right past a massive highway lightpole at 60mph and down a 70ft snowy slope. Slid to a fucking halt at the bottom (did not spill my rum and coke.)

Holy shit dude. This is why we have drunk driving laws.

Alchol drug test

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- Mon, 26 Aug 2019 18:33:48 EST ZIqjlxYv No.282480
File: 1566858828977.jpg -(86268B / 84.25KB, 800x800) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size. Alchol drug test
I drank last night around 11 o'clock and i have a piss test today won't take it till 7-8 today. what can i do to pass these tests. its for cps. they say i cant drink on the weekends. if i don't have my kids i should be aloud to drink im a adult and im of age and i dont do drugs and i hold a job. i can't type for shit sorry
3 posts omitted. Click View Thread to read.
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Beatrice Penderdale - Mon, 26 Aug 2019 20:22:30 EST XhhzOovV No.282486 Reply
I mean say you drank a couple kombuchas TODAY. Not yesterday. But bring it up casually, like you don't know that there's 0.5% booze.
>>
Cornelius Pommlewot - Tue, 27 Aug 2019 19:04:59 EST pyf9nQ/Y No.282502 Reply
>>282486
lol i literally just did that for real, drank kombucha and forgot it had alc in it, was going to have to go to outpatient and take a piss test. ended up not going due to surgery the day before, but i was like yeah they wont believe me, fuck it.

Bars

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- Mon, 19 Aug 2019 03:13:22 EST MxMbJkHY No.282420
File: 1566198802701.gif -(333476B / 325.66KB, 700x959) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size. Bars
How do you choose your bar for the night? For me, the default choice is usually just the close one. It's familiar, it's affordable, I know everybody. The young people hate it because they're prowling for hotties but that actually works fine for me because I'm low-key just there to get shitfaced and listen to the jukebox.

If I feel adventurous, I usually try a place I've never been before, but haven't done it in a while. They last new one was a great adventure but kind of dangerous, really divey blues house filled with older people but had the hardest fucking music. I have a few choices, a really upscale nightclub, a blues tavern, a rock bar, a chill lounge, or a tequila hut.

How should I choose, /hooch/? Should I go by reputation, general customer base or economics?
15 posts and 1 images omitted. Click View Thread to read.
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Ronnie Safteyplain - Fri, 23 Aug 2019 15:50:28 EST Q2uVyQgq No.282457 Reply
Why not go on a bar tour? Have a drink or a few at each. I will typically start somewhere fancy then work my way down to dank old dives, but it could be fun to go in reverse order. I guess it all comes down to personal preference
>>
Cyril Worthingridge - Mon, 26 Aug 2019 20:34:56 EST xUh8QHqM No.282489 Reply
>>282420
There was a small bar called the Jam Inn. It had a reputation for being wild but I never experienced that. It was one of those little places that did almost no business and you know it only stayed alive because of the biker gang that kept it alive. Those are the bars I like, the ones that are quiet but can get wild, the kind where you'll get a pool stick broken over your head if you step out of line but if you're cool you can have a good night. I'd go there on LSD and just sit and talk about life with the bartender, good memories really.

The more populated ones are just too full of trouble. Too many people literally trying to pick fights. I just want to take some buddies to shoot pool at a very low skill level and mind my own business. Just loud enough that I can talk without everyone hearing my business, but still talk.
>>
Edward Harrygold - Tue, 27 Aug 2019 04:23:28 EST 1rdNxNsp No.282498 Reply
>>282489
I fucking hate fights, man

The big problem I'm having now is that my fabled alcohol tolerance has returned, and the new fathom isn't set. I don't get drunk quick anymore, so it's gonna get pricier. Good for them.

Exercising with Alcohol?

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- Fri, 23 Aug 2019 05:04:40 EST bmHLymts No.282453
File: 1566551080400.jpg -(100923B / 98.56KB, 1000x1500) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size. Exercising with Alcohol?
So I had a drunk thought just now. I only feel like improving myself when I'm drunk, so being drunk and exercising (specifically lifting weights) should also improve heart health, since it's harder on your heart and your blood is thinner, right? Ignore picture, just the first google result.
>>
Martin Bracklebury - Fri, 23 Aug 2019 08:59:48 EST KXKkJs5d No.282456 Reply
Anecdotally, the only time i went to the gym drunk i felt much weaker than normal. It also lowers testosterone levels and shit. Also im pretty sure that would be bad for your heart. Not to mention the decreased coordination that could lead to you injuring yourself.

Exercise first, then get drunk. Makes it better
>>
Zeus's Boobz - Mon, 26 Aug 2019 07:42:52 EST H9hj/uQL No.282478 Reply
>>282453
I don't know about ur stupid ass theory, but I know that ain't how the heart works. Do anything strenuous before getting inebriated.

Aurora calling

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- Sun, 25 Aug 2019 00:23:31 EST Naimlm3X No.282469
File: 1566707011032.jpg -(85755B / 83.75KB, 1080x1079) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size. Aurora calling
Where's that Acksnes girl? We're trying to do a music video wiff no cocaine here, get that b*llshit bitch right on this dot.

T-Break Causing Insane Dreams

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- Sat, 17 Aug 2019 07:35:56 EST 4H/9l7bZ No.282403
File: 1566041756940.gif -(485150B / 473.78KB, 188x174) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size. T-Break Causing Insane Dreams
Sup /hooch/,

First of all, fuck you, I'm not taking this to /dr/ because I actually want some replies, and this whole thing is directly related to alcohol.

I'm the OP of a few threads around here. I've been boozing it up for a lot of years. I've chronicled on /detox/ my efforts over the years to cut back on drinking (always met with eventual binging). But I won't stop trying!

I didn't drink last night or the night before, and have been trying to stay hydrated and eat healthy. My toe joints are still sore and my piss still foamy so I know my body isn't even close to detoxed yet but it is on the way.

I have been trying to just sleep a lot to avoid cravings, and avoid going and getting booze. It's worked okay for now, but goddamn I just had a series of the craziest dreams of my life. Normally my dreams are murky and I struggle to recall them, but the three of these were all vivid and still crystal clear in my mind's eye. I woke up quite stressed from each of them. I guess once my perpetually depressed CNS is unleashed it goes off the fucking rails. Keep in mind all 3 of these dreams occurred one after the other.

>Dream 1:

I am a colonial marine fighting xenomorphs. My squad and I are taking shots with our pulse rifles at a couple small ones, when the whole hive descends on us. I see my brothers-in-arms being impaled, ripped apart, limbs snapped, and run the fuck away. I head for some nearby rocky outcrop and find a tunnel network that leads me down to an underground cavern with a lake. I dive in the water and swim across the lake, somehow I managed to evade the aliens. While I cower in a dark corner a figure starts to approach me. I freak out and scream, it's one other soldier who made it to safety. "Holy shit I can't believe I found you!" they said.

I woke up from this with adrenaline coursing through me, had to take some deep breaths just to chill out.

>Dream 2:
I am with a group of strangers, who give off big time tweaker/druggie vibes. I feel unsafe and nervous around them. It is two men and two women. The women seem despondent, likely sex slaves. We are at some dirty drug den. One of the men suggests we start fucking the women, and I hesitate to agree. One of the women starts stripping naked and grabbing at my dick so I just go with it. I am banging this super hot chick and trying not to think about the STD's I will acquire, when the whole group all gives each other a knowing look. The chick I'm banging wants to stop. I can sense the group is planning to murder and rob someone. I don't want to participate. Maybe they are planning to murder me. I ask if I can get a ride, they say no. I struggle to collect my clothes (everyone's clothes were all mixed together) and stealthily leave this place. As I leave and start walking down the street I am suddenly approaching my mom's house where, thank god, my car is parked. However she is wearing a gas mask and BDU's and carrying a flamethrower, and is covered in (unignited) napalm. I feel a sense of pure horror as I realize some kind of crazy chemical warfare is breaking out.

I didn't wake up from this dream, but just snap into dream 3.

>Dream 3

Me and 3 good buddies are somewhere in the frozen north, maybe canada, riding snowmobiles along a snowy trail with the sides of the trail dropping into a slushy bank. We are going along shooting the shit when we come upon some ice. I remember asking one of my friends "Have you ever driven on ice before?" and we start chatting about it when we all slip and flip our snowmobiles over. We all get up and check if everyone is okay, everyone is fine. Then we hear a splash. We turn and notice a stream of water is on one of the banks of the trail, and one of our friends is wading around in it up to his knees. I feel a sense of panic and scream at him, "GET OUT OF THE WATER NOW!" He just chuckles and keeps stomping around when he slips and gets completely submerged. He breaks the surface and I can see the terror in his eyes. "DUDE GET OUT OF THE WATER!" I keep screaming. "I c-c-an't! It's t-t-too h-h-a-rd!" I go into survival mode and scan around the trees frantically, grab a big branch and hang my weight on it to snap it off. We all use the branch to pull him out of the water. I tell my friends "We need to make a fire RIGHT NOW or he is going to die." They all nod …
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Shit Deshpone - Thu, 22 Aug 2019 00:50:23 EST 4H/9l7bZ No.282448 Reply
>>282447

you are correct and i have taken these things into consideration. although i struggle to go for very many days without any alcohol, on the days that i do drink, it is better than it used to be. for a couple years i was drinking two 40's every night until i got severe gout and couldnt put any weight on one foot. now i am at the point where on days that i do drink, i have maybe 8 regular beers or 6 shots. it is improving. also i am sleeping more than i used to, giving my organs more time to process the poison. i am actually climbing out of this hole, very very slowly. tomorrow i am going to attempt a 7 day run. this is incremental progress.
>>
Barnaby Bollerkene - Thu, 22 Aug 2019 02:50:20 EST XzI5v15K No.282449 Reply
>>282448
Yea, I think beer causes gout (we call it (grout) more than other alcohols.
A couple of 40s isn't really that bad. But I do know drinking, and heavily
drinking. 8 regular beers isn't very bad. I found that even in heavy
drinking cutting back from two to one is easy to adjust two, even if
drinking daily. Just takes a night of restless sleep then one 40 I
found is defiantly enough, and wonder why I drank that or more
anyway. Yea you definitely not at really heavy drinking levels.

Yea if you can go without 7 days, by all means go for it.
i htink of it this way, if I haven't drank, for * few days, there
is always tomorrow. Then tomorrow, again, there is always
tomorrow. The keep going from there. I understand gout is
pretty painful.

Myself, I haven't drank for maybe a couple of months. I rarely
even think about it these days. Everything feels normal again.
Hobbies and active things are almost, not quite but almost
like before I got on this seemingly never ending kick.
Sleep isn't drinking to sleep, but sleeping to sleep.

Good luck on you ventures and hope your grout soon
gets well again.
>>
Edward Durringfire - Sun, 25 Aug 2019 00:02:38 EST FX+Xw3FX No.282468 Reply
Bullshit I want to have an aliens dream asshole.

Shart warnings

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- Mon, 19 Aug 2019 00:43:57 EST Ktx5U+KL No.282417
File: 1566189837506.jpg -(38274B / 37.38KB, 480x542) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size. Shart warnings
Do there exist any guidelines in helping being able to identify if one will shit explosive diarrhea when they attempt to relieve a bit of gas or not? This is frustrating. One single poorly timed fart can ruin an entire evening.
1 posts omitted. Click View Thread to read.
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Dextrolord - Mon, 19 Aug 2019 17:44:26 EST pTeS0/EJ No.282423 Reply
1566251066815.jpg -(71118B / 69.45KB, 936x864) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size.
>>282417
It takes experience to tell, that is how i learned. I haven't had an accidental start in years now. My butthole just knows haha

My secret was a crash course in heavy dim use and sorbitol gut, once i was able to tell those farts and sharts apart i was gtg my man
>>
Clara Hossledit - Mon, 19 Aug 2019 20:57:22 EST 4H/9l7bZ No.282424 Reply
i remember a few years back there was a thread about like, wisdom your grandpa taught you and someone posted "never trust a fart."

thats my only advice. assume every fart could be a shart
>>
Cedric Binnerville - Tue, 20 Aug 2019 00:08:35 EST 8rAIybEA No.282427 Reply
Lol fortunately this only happened to me once, at least in public.
For me stomach cramping is a dead giveaway. If my tummy hurts I hold it in for the life of me, now.

DUI/rock bottom

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- Fri, 24 Aug 2018 19:15:36 EST LSn9JcR6 No.279604
File: 1535152536194.jpg -(180774B / 176.54KB, 1024x681) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size. DUI/rock bottom
I'm 22 years old with 2 DUIs. I feel like the biggest loser in the world, and feel like I have nothing to live for since cars were my only hobby. Honestly considered suicide after getting the 2nd one. License gone for 3 years and will never be able to afford more than liability insurance. When I'm drunk, getting in the car just doesn't seem like a big deal. Just like texting my ex or fighting with my parents doesn't feel like a big deal. If this isn't rock bottom then I don't want to see what kind of hell continuing to drink will lead me to. A future of homelessness and unemployment doesn't seem too unrealistic anymore. My drinking destroyed my life before it ever really even began.

Does anybody have me beat in this department? Tell me about your rock bottom, even if it doesn't involve DUI. I feel like after 3-4 DUIs your life is basically finished. I have no more second chances but I can't put down the bottle. When I was in rehab, I told a meth addict that I would trade his addiction for my driving record.
22 posts and 8 images omitted. Click View Thread to read.
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Ernest Tillingbanks - Sun, 30 Jun 2019 05:58:18 EST nRfUbmcX No.281922 Reply
1561888698828.jpg -(33383B / 32.60KB, 486x360) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size.
>>281920
You're not going to rape a child while blackout drunk if you weren't already a pedo sober. It's a retarded comparison. Those serial killers clearly were serial killers without the booze.

That's part of the point of the
>"that's just his true nature coming out"
line from Moral Orel.

It accentuates your bad habits but it doesn't turn you into a child rapist / serial killer. I make a point to NEVER lie and as I understand I have never lied while blackout drunk except once... apparently I said I wouldn't drink anymore that night than drank again because I didn't comprehend what the fuck I was doing. Main reason I don't trust owning a gun is I might do something stupid while drunk and kill myself.

Even if you teach a person "don't be a drunk driver" and even if the person genuinely believes "I would never be a drunk driver", they could still end up at the back of a wheel thinking "well I'm not really drunk". But maybe it turns out they are more drunk than they realize... or the drinks sneak up on them as the unprocessed alcohol enters their bloodstream. Real DUI classes aren't people screaming at them about how terrible they are for being drunk drivers. They are educating people on what is considered drunk driving, learning their limit, realizing alcohol takes time to effect you... things like that.

The point I'm making is people sometimes make mistakes without realizing what they're doing. You should work to educate people and have them learn methods to avoid those mistakes in the future, not go into histrionics and screech FUCK DRUNK DRIVERS THEY'RE UNFORGIVABLE SCUM AND SHOULD ALL DIE REEEEEEEEEEEE. That's how you end up with people like OP who think their life is over and they should consider suicide. Again, yes of course drunk driving is terrible. So is an alzheimer's patient driving... but there is no malicious or ill-intent in either. Work to stop it from happening rather than focusing on hating them.
>>
Shit Durringridge - Sun, 30 Jun 2019 15:11:07 EST APgsu79i No.281926 Reply
>>281922
i never fucking said it turns you into a murderer, my point was drunkenness is a shitty excuse for wrongdoing. if one cant exercise restraint while drinking then they shouldnt be drinking.

>there is no malicious or ill-intent
bad people don't tend to think of themselves as such. they're just inconsiderate of other people

shame is a powerful motivator for change imo. im doing my part. cheers for the moral orel reference btw
>>
Sidney Chessleham - Mon, 19 Aug 2019 12:38:55 EST xgbMebSd No.282421 Reply
>>282342
Imagine his insurance premium

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