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Sandwich


unexperienced

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- Wed, 02 Nov 2016 06:27:03 EST /Ttk4zqa No.54591
File: 1478082423754.jpg -(13187B / 12.88KB, 150x150) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size. unexperienced
should I get a professional for a chemical peel or do it myself?
>>
Angus Murdham - Wed, 17 Oct 2018 15:57:00 EST R0Ou9c8/ No.55615 Reply
>>54591
I am a beautician, and I say you can do it yourself at home with a small amount of coconut oil. A 5kg jar should be enough for your needs. Coconut oil, or copra oil, is an edible oil extracted from the kernel or meat of mature coconuts harvested from the coconut palm which grows in the plantations of the Great Barrier Reef. You take a stainless steel tablespoon of 100% pure organic coconut oil at a time, and smear it all over your face using the back of the spoon. Spread around generously. Once you have covered your face and forehead completely, take the remainder of the jar and utilise in an enema at exactly 11.35pm at this time of year as it works in conjunction with the moon. Because of its high saturated fat content, it is slow to oxidize and, thus, resistant to rancidification whilst in your rectum. After 30mins of withholding, give your Anus a playful little tap or two with the stainless steel spoon, say 'open sesame' and expel. The tap is THE SECRET to the facial technique working properly! Remove excess oil from yourself, clean face thoroughly. Voila! You are now beautiful inside and out. You're welcome.
Good luck.

Fishy smell

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- Thu, 16 Mar 2017 18:20:57 EST VtmCVvMA No.54852
File: 1489702857384.jpg -(1007432B / 983.82KB, 2560x1440) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size. Fishy smell
So I fucked this prostitute 3 months ago and her vagina raked. My penis still smells like fish and its been 3 months. I called the nurse at the doctors office and she didn't say anything. Anybody know what this is and how to get rid of it so I can have sex with my girlfriend?
4 posts omitted. Click View Thread to read.
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Edwin Goodbanks - Fri, 17 Mar 2017 16:02:21 EST sSi3q2bS No.54858 Reply
>I called the nurse at the doctors office and she didn't say anything.

holy shit I would like to hear how that conversation went
>>
Angus Heckleridge - Sat, 18 Mar 2017 03:02:51 EST VtmCVvMA No.54860 Reply
>>54858
Hey I had sex with this girl and my genitals smell.
Let me ask the doctor......he said he doesn't know
>>
Angus Murdham - Wed, 17 Oct 2018 15:17:18 EST R0Ou9c8/ No.55614 Reply
>>54852
If you continue without treatment much longer, you will be saying goodbye to your chap and saying hello to a rancid trout in your pants young man. I highly reccomend starting coconut oil masturbation sessions asap - method is to smother your pudding with 25-30g of organic coconut oil, but replace your fingers with 5 stainless steel spoons. Wood spoons will not work despite their name. 25mins minimum of this, 30mins max, for 7 nights. Using circular motions up and down the shaft paying extra attention to the banjo string area where the fish smell originates. You MUST use this technique for 7 nights DO NOT quit halfway through or you will be brain dead the next morning and it will be all your fault. I know an English guy this happened to.
Good luck.

Spermatocele

View Thread Reply
- Thu, 25 Aug 2016 08:07:43 EST YO0OApYS No.54435
File: 1472126863856.jpg -(26769B / 26.14KB, 400x320) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size. Spermatocele
I've got a "Spermatocele" in my nutsac, basically a cyst. It's painful. How do I get rid of it without surgery? My doctor said he wont remove it until it gets to "the size of a grapefruit" which could be years away. I don't want to wait that long or to have it grow that big.

Would regular gentle squeezing make the fluid move out of the cyst?
4 posts omitted. Click View Thread to read.
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Lillian Buvingwill - Wed, 26 Oct 2016 05:46:51 EST LQqHEoxA No.54583 Reply
>>54435

Find a different doctor. The one you're seeing is a dipshit. A cyst might rupture and spread an infection that might kill you, make you sterile, cause gangrene or all kinds of nasty complications.
>>
Cyril Bropperway - Fri, 02 Jun 2017 13:05:13 EST ovwJXydd No.54985 Reply
>>54435
ittl go away by itself dude. i had one not too long ago. just keep nuttin
>>
Angus Murdham - Wed, 17 Oct 2018 14:51:09 EST R0Ou9c8/ No.55613 Reply
>>54435
Cover your cyst in 10ml coconut oil and rub it gently with a spoon for 125 seconds, or until the oil is absorbed. Use the back of the spoon and remember to sterilise the spoon first in your favoured manner. The coconut oil begins dissolving the contents of the spermatocele like hydrochloric acid would. Don't be tempted to to use more than 10ml or you risk dissolving not just the cyst but your entire ball sack too. Use circular motions clockwise and then anticlockwise and i guarantee results overnight.
Good luck!

Mucus in my stool

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- Mon, 18 Apr 2016 21:54:39 EST 0VoOU4Ma No.54023
File: 1461030879936.jpg -(1865041B / 1.78MB, 4160x2340) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size. Mucus in my stool
Recently ive been plugging a lot of 3meopcp since i got it. Havent been the most sterile or safe with it. In yhe last few days ive been finding it hard to poop most of the time and often times i get mucus in my poop like in the picture. I do have very slight discomfort in my stomach and bladder regions as well but its not horrible. What could it possibly be? I cant really see a doctor right now so please dont recommend it even though I know its the best option if available. Has this happened to anyone else? Can i let it pass on its own? How worrried shoyld i really be?
3 posts and 1 images omitted. Click View Thread to read.
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Cyril Fidgeshaw - Mon, 09 May 2016 23:19:31 EST oF3bOWEj No.54074 Reply
Had any other symptoms? Nausea? Do you pee normally? I suggest you start living a healthy life for a few days, with better diet, more fibber, water, to help your intestins. And don't do that 3meopcp thing, whatever the fuck that is, if you think that is what is causing the symptoms. And see if you get better. If you don't, I suggest doctor.
Also, if there's fever, or the pain increases, I have some bad news for your wallet, you gotta see a doctor if you wanna tell the tale.
>>
Augustus Tootville - Tue, 10 May 2016 07:50:43 EST yK6iSoPH No.54075 Reply
mucus is a typical response to the irritation of anal canal
it is very likely plugging is causing this
stop plugging for a few days and avoid doing it so often in the future
>>
Angus Murdham - Wed, 17 Oct 2018 14:31:26 EST R0Ou9c8/ No.55612 Reply
The Great Barrier Reef is home to some of the most spectacular coconut plantations in the world, and the oil they produce has been found to be able to cure almost 57,5% of all ailments one would go to a hospital for help with! The oil is worth more than gold to the people who know the secret technique of using it. Clinical studies have proven it can even regenerate complex organs like eyes if the treatment plan is strictly adhered to (this particular discovery won a Nobel prize). I wrote a published paper myself on a technique used in situations very similar to yours. I've analysed your photo and decided I'd like to help you as I don't think it will pass on its own. I advise in your case to purchase a 1kg glass jar of 100% organic certified coconut oil and use an enema kit to deposit the entire contents directly into your rectum, then use a stainless steel spoon to hold it all in. Use a teaspoon or tablespoon depending on the size of your sphincter. You'll have to push quite hard against your Anus for 45minutes as peristalsis will begin almost immediately. Just before you expel the contents and experience the Heavenly relief, give your butthole a little loving rub with the back of the spoon. This last part is THE SECRET to curing yourself of your distasteful mucus problem.
You may experience a little weight gain but it's a small price to pay if you want to continue plugging that stuff up your ass, don't you think?
Good luck.

Penis Skin tone

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- Thu, 06 Jul 2017 18:33:33 EST EId63CDm No.55046
File: 1499380413842.jpg -(21291B / 20.79KB, 424x410) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size. Penis Skin tone
I need to know if there's a way to bright up my penis skin tone.
please help me guys..
1 posts omitted. Click View Thread to read.
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Augustus Turveywill - Wed, 12 Jul 2017 11:08:10 EST c7sCQ0xT No.55050 Reply
Well they can bleach assholes so I guess they can bleach dicks.

Why do you need your dick lightened?
>>
Ernest Brillerman - Fri, 21 Jul 2017 04:00:17 EST W9WjeTfi No.55056 Reply
are you the man with the shiny purple dick from the other thread
>>
Angus Murdham - Wed, 17 Oct 2018 13:52:44 EST R0Ou9c8/ No.55611 Reply
>>55046
I got you on this one! Ive heard you can accomplish this by massaging organic coconut oil into your butthole in a circular motion. This sounds like a joke but I'm serious - the colour will start to brighten within minutes. Lots of people in England are doing this to lighten the skintone on their penises (men) or vulvulas (women). Take the oil and a high chrome teaspoon (you can purchase ribbed ones from a pharmacy for extra pleasure) and rub 50ml, or 75ml for sunshine level radiant skin, into your Anus hourly for at least a couple of days. Use the back of the spoon!
Good luck!

Injected semen, am I going to die

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- Mon, 05 Jun 2017 23:12:04 EST gag2Y+/z No.54993
File: 1496718724374.jpg -(22752B / 22.22KB, 654x457) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size. Injected semen, am I going to die
Hey /med/ so I am an IV drug user and my water was cut off recently. I was really fucked up last night masturbating and I jizzed in a spoon. I don't know what I was thinking, but then I mixed dope in with the cum and injected it. Should I see a doctor?
2 posts omitted. Click View Thread to read.
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Edwin Gingerwill - Wed, 28 Jun 2017 15:13:51 EST FZETC8al No.55034 Reply
Honestly I don't see this being a major problem, surely the sperm will just die off and get filtered out of the blood. Other than that semen is pretty much just water. It's probably better than getting water from a dirty public bathroom
>>
Priscilla Gomblefield - Mon, 03 Jul 2017 11:00:25 EST y8vldrUs No.55042 Reply
1499094025824.png -(651486B / 636.22KB, 1098x1300) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size.
>>55037
>Also, what if the sperm make it to his brain, what then!?
We have pretty clear medicial history on this, pic related.
>>
Angus Murdham - Wed, 17 Oct 2018 02:38:27 EST R0Ou9c8/ No.55609 Reply
>>54993
No, you will not die - but you need to follow the following procedure. Have you by any chance heard of the coconut oil spoon method? It's been a craze in England in 2018, and although it sounds like pseudoscience it's effect is amazing. Your doc will have knowledge of the method, he can perform the procedure on you himself, prescribe you the kit or you can find the items individually yourself. You'll need 5kg glass jar of 100% pure, organic virgin coconut oil, a highly polished stainless steel teaspoon and a razor. Start by shaving off all the public hair around your Anus. I hear people wax it off too. Get a teaspoon of the coconut oil and smear it around your asshole and utilise the back of the spoon to rub in gentle circular motions. You'll probably need 2-3 spoonfuls every night for 2wks. You can do it in comfort of your home if you lay a towel under yourself. This procedure can be highly erotic and rewarding if done with TLC - you can even experiment inserting the handle inside yourself if you decide you'd like to try it. This is very powerful, treatment tackles all situations where semen had been accidentaly iv'd. You can purchase emergency kits in preparation for such an occasion. It happens so often everyday all around the country and so many are not ready and end up succuming. Do not stop halfway through the course of treatment! The DNA in the semen can still mutate and make extra body parts grow on the external dermis. I read about one woman who accidentaly iv'd her boyfriends cum, stopped the anal coconut oiling after 5 days and grew an Adams apple on her buttock and a ball sack on one eyelid. She now needs specialist footwear as each foot has grown its own huge foreskin and glans.
Good luck.

STD Paranoia

View Thread Reply
- Wed, 17 Jan 2018 02:03:01 EST x6FKQZEM No.55234
File: 1516172581083.jpg -(34356B / 33.55KB, 720x842) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size. STD Paranoia
Hey guys,


I really need some genuine advice especially from any possible medical professionals that happen to be here as well. I'm a 20 year old male and every time I have sex with a new partner even with a condom I'm absolutely terrified that I've contracted an STD, especially the ones that you can't get rid of like Herpes. The first time I ever had sex it was with an older more experienced girl and I used a condom and never really worried about it. The second partner I fucked this girl I was in love with and didn't use a condom and came inside of her (she was on birth control). Never was worried about that. It was only when I got drunk and had sex with this girl without protection when I was 18 that was kind of promiscuous that I freaked the fuck out and started getting tested for every possible STD i could and going to the doctor for every little bump or ingrown hair ive ever seen down there. They say at planned Parenthood it takes about 4-6 weeks for every thing to show up so I would find myself being extremely depressed until i waited out the incubation periods and then it takes another 2 weeks they tell you to wait after your test and if you don't get a call, your results are normal. I made sure to get tested for everything including both strains of Herpes and I've never tested positive for anything, except once when I got molluscum when I was fucking these two girls at the same time. That took months of treatment and was absolutely miserable before it finally went away. Anyways, After I finally got rid of my molluscum i went months and months without having sex basically just to make sure it was gone and because I wasn't really in the mood to have sex after that. All my tests came back clean and i didn't have anything and My molluscum never came back so December 2017 I assumed it was okay to become sexually active again. This girl invited me over and after basically begging me to fuck her I finally caved, but made sure to wear condoms both times we had sex. Now I'm stuck in the same position I always seem to put myself in. I have 11 more days until it's been a month since we had sex so I can go and get tested, and then 2 weeks after that to make sure I don't get a call. I know that this isn't really normal but I really just wanna make sure I'm clean and that's really all that will make me feel better. I'm a wreck. Even though the transmission percentage of actually fucking a girl with genital herpes with a condom is 2% of the year with no symptoms, I can't seem to put it into perspective that I'm most probably fine like i always am. What kind of help do I need?
>>
Simon Sittingpudging - Thu, 18 Jan 2018 12:23:38 EST z8aiqwlu No.55235 Reply
yeah dude Star Trek: Discovery is total shit mate i feel you
>>
Angus Murdham - Wed, 17 Oct 2018 01:32:15 EST R0Ou9c8/ No.55608 Reply
>>55234
It sounds like you've had an awful fright, so I have a modicum of genuine advice for you. The procedure may sound horrendous, but millions of people in England are currently curing themselves of all kinds of ailments utilising this method. Have you heard of the 'oil and spoon' method? Doctors are blown away with the results. What you do is apply 100% pure organic coconut oil directly to your asshole, and massage gently in a circular motion with the back of a stainless steel spoon for 5 minutes. From your post it sounds like you need to utilise a tablespoon, not a teaspoon. If you buy a 2kg jar and massage 3x tablespoons into your anus every night for a week, then 4x tablespoons for another week, you will become immune to all STDs in existence and also Aspergers Syndrome. You'll be able to 'fuck bitches' to your hearts content without the intrusive thoughts and panic tests. Be sure to finish the entire jar, because you could actually lose your cock and later die if you quit halfway through! It will just come off in your underwear or while you urinate, and then you'll know it's you next. You'll just keel over one day, and it'll be all your fault your family is mourning you.
Good luck!

Ballmastrz 9000: Balled too hard?

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- Sat, 16 Jun 2018 01:57:33 EST Ao2VmIUs No.55436
File: 1529128653398.gif -(1767490B / 1.69MB, 450x253) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size. Ballmastrz 9000: Balled too hard?
I need a quick medical opinion and since I'm american this is my best option

My left nut feels oddly... sensitive today. There's no pain, and i've confirmed it's still attached, but it feels oddly strained, kind of like you know how your nuts feel if they ever retract too far in in your sack/inside your body to an uncomfortable degree? It feels like that, but it's hanging at it's normal height.

Needless to say about any ball related shit, i'm freaked. The best I can figure is last weekend while i was masturbating I accidentally blueballed myself pretty hard and it hurt, but the pain subsided and i jerked off twice since then and the sensitivity only started today? the feeling subsides a bit if i stand vs sitting and seems mostly located in the strand that connects the ball to the body

Did I just bruise a blood vessel when I blueballed myself or is this more serious? how long should I wait to talk to someone as long as it doesn't hurt?

Will update soon if it subsides/continues...
2 posts omitted. Click View Thread to read.
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Cornelius Bardwater - Sat, 04 Aug 2018 13:04:31 EST qzXX4B4A No.55499 Reply
Could be epididymitis. I've had it in my right one, its pretty harmless. But you really should get any ball related stuff checked out
>>
Angus Murdham - Wed, 17 Oct 2018 01:03:15 EST R0Ou9c8/ No.55607 Reply
>>55436
This is going to sound crazy young man, but you must dip your nutsack into a bowl of decanted organic coconut oil and rub your nuts allover with a stainless steel spoon. You can buy a kit from the pharmacy which contains a glass jar of between 250g - 50kg of 100% coconut oil, and spoons of differing sizes. The highly polished ones are much more effective. You may need to wax beforehand. The right one aswell please, spread the oil everywhere to make sure you get all the benefits (I mean hold your dick in the other hand, and rub around and around yourself utilising the back of the spoon.. And right into the taint/crack) . Unfortunately, as your nut is still attached you aren't anywhere nearly deformed enough to make use stronger procedures. There is one where you insert the spoon deep into your rectum,but please do not do be tempted to do this, no matter how pleasurable it gets. This procedure is too powerful for the minor ailment you have, and I fear you would find yourself sprouting an extra pair of bollocks behind the ones you already own.
Please update us with how this turns out ASAP, we're currently on the edge of our seats with anticipation.
Good luck!

Surgery and Infection

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- Mon, 13 Mar 2017 21:49:32 EST TYRR92s5 No.54839
File: 1489456172387.jpg -(3412679B / 3.25MB, 3840x2160) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size. Surgery and Infection
I have recently (this weekend) undergone minor surgery to stitch up my ear after the top was split due to being attacked with a knife and I'm on clarithromycin to prevent infection and I was wondering, out of paranoia, how I would know if the wound was infected. I am obviously concerned about it healing properly and getting in touch with the surgery clinic has been a nightmare. I've been using an ointment regularly to stem off infection but was wondering, would it be obvious if there was an infection? I've never had anything like this before.

Photo is my ear post operation.
4 posts and 1 images omitted. Click View Thread to read.
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Samuel Muzzlewodge - Thu, 16 Mar 2017 00:12:42 EST NHGTafh1 No.54851 Reply
>>54839

i just want to restate that is some really impressive stitching they did, you should be happy about it. i worked in an ER for a year and i saw a few ears and noses stitched back together and it was rarely as neat as yours. it will obviously have a scar but it should heal very well and be not very noticeable.
>>
Nathaniel Brangerwater - Sat, 25 Mar 2017 01:30:27 EST PATtkuQB No.54875 Reply
>>54844
Hydrogen Peroxide is quick and easy but it destroys a lot of newly formed/healed flesh. I wouldn't use it.
>>
Angus Murdham - Wed, 17 Oct 2018 00:19:52 EST R0Ou9c8/ No.55606 Reply
>>54839
Coconut oil is a fantastic antiseptic young man. But you apply it straight to your asshole and not your ear, using the back of a stainless steel spoon to rub it in gently. I know this sounds far fetched, but it's a craze from England that scientific studies are blown away by. Do not try diluting the oil, this will only make it stronger - a bit like homeopathy - and you may even grow another ear somewhere on your body, the effects are that powerful! You'll only need a small amount. I've had a look at your photo, and I think a small 250ml jar should be enough to stop your ear eventually going black and falling off. Start ASAP as I see this process has already commenced. Two stainless steel teaspoonsful on an eve to begin with, increasing to four in the second week, and then six teaspoonsful but internally (you will want to do this anyway at this point) every night until you finish the jar. Warm the spoon up in warm milk beforehand if you fancy. This will definitely save your ear and enable you to find a girl who'll like that you look normal and non-deformed when you grow up. Dose for inevitable STDs is as above, but applied morning and night (you'll need the 500ml jar).
Good luck!

Stopping Xanax With Lamictal

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- Thu, 14 Sep 2017 11:16:34 EST FQZmEY3B No.55091
File: 1505402194900.jpg -(8274B / 8.08KB, 377x261) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size. Stopping Xanax With Lamictal
I take Lamictol/Lambipol for my Bipolarity but also know it is an anti-epileptic.

I also happen to have a huge, huge dependency on Xanax. It can range from 6 to 15mg a day. It's been going on for 10 years. Sometimes I'll take an entire box in a night and I won't feel a thing, honestly.

Anyway.. I want out of this. I'm not getting high. This is a maintenance dose.

Would Lamictol make for a faster taper due to its anti-epileptic attributes?

I'm not gonna stop cold turkey. But if I do... I will go full seizure mode right?

Thanks in advance guys.
2 posts omitted. Click View Thread to read.
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Sidney Soffingforth - Sun, 24 Sep 2017 20:24:36 EST cWciUpNW No.55111 Reply
1506299076561.jpg -(75165B / 73.40KB, 645x860) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size.
I took 3 mgs of Clonazepam for about two years in my most recent prescription (taking benzos on and off for 5-6 years). While tapering off Clonazepam, I happened to be taking 200mg of Lamictal a day for mood stabilization, so that was considered a buffer against any threat of epilepsy, according to my psychiatrist.

I was really afraid while tapering off Clonazepam, but no two people withdrawal the same. I think the biggest threat is psyching yourself out. I hope you get out of this, too, because after years of using this stuff it really, really starts to change us.

I had a very painless withdrawal, no physical side effects and a very short period of stressing over whether or not I would have a panic attack or something. I never did. I dropped from 3 to 2.5, to 1.5, to nothing. About a span of 30 days in between each drop.

One thing I wish I hadn't done: read a bunch of shit on the internet about benzo withdrawal. You're psyching yourself out. I did the same thing. You will DOUBTLESSLY find posts about people having a hard time, but take it slow and it really helps if you can tell someone in your life what is going on. I think the most psychological agonizing part of withdrawal is feeling alone. You got any friends, good friends? Family? Love is a potent thing when you're up against fear.

I wish you peace of mind, whether or not you're going through the taper, because no one deserves to be chained to a substance like this.
>>
Archie Crebbertutch - Mon, 25 Sep 2017 02:14:02 EST 21fkN6sI No.55112 Reply
Taking Lamictal won't necessarily make your withdrawal any better, so it might still be better to stick to a normal taper schedule, to reduce risk of relapse
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Angus Murdham - Tue, 16 Oct 2018 23:29:09 EST R0Ou9c8/ No.55605 Reply
>>55091
Have you tried tapering with the oil and spoon kit? It does mean showing your asshole to a doc, and feel the oil melt and run down your leg as he rubs you inside and out pleasantly with the back of a steel spoon (DO NOT use plastic ones, they are many times inferior and you could bleed to fucking death if the twat snaps). But I hear it works wonders for withdrawals. The coconuts used are 100% organic, fresh and the oil melts between your buttocks wonderfully.
Try not to fart.
Good luck!

Coconut oil/stainless steel spoon kits

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- Tue, 16 Oct 2018 23:05:42 EST R0Ou9c8/ No.55604
File: 1539745542432.jpg -(3561B / 3.48KB, 160x227) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size. Coconut oil/stainless steel spoon kits
Has anyone heard about or bought one of these coconut oil/stainless steel teaspoon kits? I've heard they can cure just about anything.

woke up in a wet bed near my GF

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- Mon, 30 Jan 2017 03:20:06 EST OGgsOPCf No.54736
File: 1485764406752.jpg -(58031B / 56.67KB, 400x480) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size. woke up in a wet bed near my GF
25yr old male here.
Never happened to me before
(besides when I was a kid).

Woke up in a wet bed today. GF took it considerably relaxed.

Embarrassed as fuck!

I know things like this can happen when there is a lot of stress in life.
But there is nothing major going on right now.
Feel pretty relaxed the whole time.

Do I need to look for a doc?

Is there any way to know this will happen again?

Any symptoms I need to look for?

I don't want to experience this ever again!
3 posts and 1 images omitted. Click View Thread to read.
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Matilda Sacklehick - Mon, 22 May 2017 12:36:15 EST pk7Bjdih No.54965 Reply
>>54736

Are you on any medications for sleep? Did you drink alcohol?
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Shit Brookwater - Mon, 22 May 2017 20:10:59 EST YZzdD5Iz No.54966 Reply
no joke OP, i suggest doing some kegel exercises to strengthen the sphincters controlling your urine flow (males have 2). just try to start and stop your pissing mid-stream several times to build up those muscles. i know it may sound like bullshit but it's actually a successful remedy if kids have a bedwetting problem.
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Angus Murdham - Tue, 16 Oct 2018 22:57:22 EST R0Ou9c8/ No.55603 Reply
>>54736
Ask your doctor to prescribe you the coconut oil and highly polished stainless steel teaspoon kit, pissy pants! The coconut oil is 100% organic and from fresh green coconuts, ie. not the old brown store bought ones. Get the 5kg glass jar if you can. The plastic jars leech chemicals. The instructions tell you to part your buttocks (you may need to wax the area first) and spread one heaped spoonful of coconut oil around your asshole and immediately rub yourself with the rear of the spoon. Gently, in a circular and oddly pleasant, massagey kind of way. You may find this becomes more pleasurable as the treatment continues, and finally intensely erotic by the end. You'll need to continue this application, stinkbomb, every morning and every night or you'll pee the bed like a naughty little boy, and more and more often, until you have no choice but to resort to adult diapers. Continue until the whole 5kg has been used. Your bladder will know if you cheat, and will shrivel up and tell your prostate to enlarge if the treatment on your asshole is neglected. Perhaps you can get your girlfriend (if she'll stay with you and support through this without laughing) to join in and add a new erotic vibe to your Sex life? She can even insert the handle if you find the idea sexy enough. This treatment is from England, home of the Finest Sheffield Steel. The coconuts are from The Great Barrier Reef or something.
It worked absolute wonders for me!
Good luck.

Fuck, had a tooth removed!

View Thread Reply
- Thu, 14 Jul 2016 01:00:40 EST yw2pWV+y No.54287
File: 1468472440941.jpg -(311333B / 304.04KB, 1080x1026) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size. Fuck, had a tooth removed!
So, I copped a pretty nasty hook to the jaw a while ago and some of my second molar chipped away.. Due to personal management issues I took some time to confront this and it naturally broke down more. I never felt any pain, and my other teeth are fine, so I didn't confront it until today. It was discovered by x-ray that the damage was so deep that an expensive root canal wouldn't be likely to save it, so I had it pulled.

I realise the complications that come with removing a molar with neighboring teeth, so I want to have an implant installed soon. It would be about 4.5 - 5k in my country, but I'm considering going to the Philippines. I hear good things, incl. the cost. My girlfriend is from there and wants to go back next year.. Any advice?
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Charles Piddlebare - Thu, 14 Jul 2016 02:20:26 EST 7a/GUzCH No.54288 Reply
it will be more challenging, because you will need someone who speaks mandarin, but probably the highest quality/cost ratio you can access: taiwan
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Angus Murdham - Tue, 16 Oct 2018 22:19:44 EST R0Ou9c8/ No.55602 Reply
>>54287
Grow a new one with the new fad from England. Order the large anal/stirrup kit, comprising 10kg jar pure organic coconut oil with the tablespoon (not the teaspoon one) and a set of plastic and rope stirups. You can choose stainless steel spoons or highly Polish stainless steel spoons for quicker results . Take 250g of the high quality oil, and slowly spoon it inside yourself rectally. This restores the ingredients, like calcium and enamel, that you'll need to regrow the tooth. As you know, they take a long time to grow in, and the treatment is quite long at 40 days but you mustn't give up halfway through or you'll die. Don't let this put you off, the experience is quite pleasant once you get used to it, you may even find yourself looking forward to putting your legs up in the stirrups each night, like women do when they have the pelvic gyno inspection thing done. Plus you'll be able to eat properly again, and not Spit meat bits out when you talk to people in the street.
Good luck.

can't poop

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- Sat, 25 Jun 2016 10:44:25 EST OTZqc9bM No.54241
File: 1466865865385.png -(372317B / 363.59KB, 411x411) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size. can't poop
help
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Matilda Muttingwater - Fri, 05 Aug 2016 00:21:02 EST 8rTptFiJ No.54375 Reply
are you taking opiates?
they are known to cause constipation
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Hannah Pibberstock - Tue, 16 Oct 2018 19:31:23 EST R0Ou9c8/ No.55591 Reply
>>54241
When I need to poop I reach for either walnuts or lettuce. Both of these things make me pooooooop!
Especially two handfuls of walnuts.
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Angus Murdham - Tue, 16 Oct 2018 22:01:41 EST R0Ou9c8/ No.55601 Reply
>>54241
But what is even better is 500g coconut oil spooned up your rectum with a stainless steel spoon,followed by a soothing rub against your ass hole with the back of the spoon. Ask your pharmacist for the small anal kit. Ask someone with a strong stomach to hold your cheeks apart for you for easier spooning. The pharmacist will stock the anal speculum add-on if everyone is a bit squeamish, or you are too shy for that sort of thing. You will shit for days. Literally, days.
Good luck.

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