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The first bad DMT trip I've had (tl;dr)

- Wed, 20 Nov 2019 14:33:17 EST zCMiTCWL No.900095
File: 1574278397688.jpg -(56620B / 55.29KB, 700x700) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size. The first bad DMT trip I've had (tl;dr)
A couple days ago I had a very scary DMT experience. It's still kinda fucking with me somewhat.

I was with a friend thankfully, recently got done with an extraction, and I tried out a way of smoking I haven't tried with DMT before. The Divine Crossing V3 ceramic atomizer. I heard amazing things about it online, some people said they preferred it over the vapor genie, and I can see why. Smoking DMT through a vaporizer? No blowtorch? More controlled temperature? And for only $30? Yeah obviously I was going to try it.

First time I tripped, I instantly tried it out, I put the temp control around 350F, put a good amount of crystals in there twice (~100mg) and tried puffing like 4-5 times. Each time, nothing. My girlfriend tried it too and she didn't get anything either. I felt ripped off, but eh, at least it was only $30. We smoked through an old dokha pipe of mine and cuddled and had a really good time, no breakthrough, just a purely familiar warm and welcome feeling.

SECOND TIME, I hang out with my girlfriend again, we were expecting to do it out of the pipe like last time, though I forgot to bring it. Kinda bummed out and desperate, I tried giving the atomizer another try, not really expecting it to work, I look inside and all the crystals had melted, glossed all over the bottom. I tried being a hardass, and kicked the temperature up to ~450F. My girlfriend was just playing on the computer while I gave this thing one last shot, nothing was set up as I didn't expect anything.

Holding the button down, I suck in at a moderate rate, for about 5 seconds I still got nothing, I said fuck it and kept going. Right into my 2nd hit I instantly got a SHIT TON of smoke, inside my mind I was like "oh shit this is actually working" and tried to seize the opportunity, not even exhaling, I keep sucking in after pushing the button again. By this time I feel DMT lining every inch of my lungs, I let go and inhale, keeping in the smoke for around 10-15 seconds. I was expecting to exhale a small cloud, instead, I blew out the biggest cloud of DMT I've ever seen, bigger than the vapor clouds I make through nicotine vape. I instantly say "oh SHIT". I start looking at this stuffed animal of a fluffy dog, it turned into this pink and orange pom poms, though its face was still there, and it's eyes and mouth started bleeding blackness as my vision starts multiplying. There was dots on the wall that expanded into this honey comb pattern, then everything turns dark. What comes after I can't really describe, it felt like I was being grabbed and pulled into the wall I was laying against, it felt like I was being taken away into complete nothingness. It's like all my cells had been energized with this feeling of "NOPE NOPE NOPE"

My girlfriend said instantly after I exhaled I started freaking out, she said I kept saying "I'M SORRY I'M SORRRRRYYYY!!!!" and howling like a howler monkey. They said my eyes had this complete terror to them while rolling in the back of my head, convulsing on the bed.

Next thing I know, I see my girlfriend and another friend of mine looking at me, telling me "It's okay, you're okay". I saw them as empty shells of their bodies, I could still tell it was them, but I could only see the outline of their skin, like they were clay people. I tried getting up, I felt like I was going to puke, though I'd make it two steps before wanting to go back to bed. My brain was going back and forth between thinking I needed to go to the hospital, and realizing I was on DMT and I just had to wait it out. My grillfriend sat by my side and I held onto her, and this kinda brought me back to reality somewhat. My ego starts to come back and I hold her even tighter, still saying "I'm sorry, I didn't know", still in a panicked state. She asks me "what happened?" I just told her "It will all be over soon", she took this as a existential statement, didn't really intend to imply that. That whole experience felt like it lasted around 20-30 minutes, though it was really around 5 minutes.

I was in complete perplexity, I've never felt such an acute amount of terror, I've done deliriants before, I could fuck with the eraserhead bullshit, this was just~ the most scared I've ever felt. I told myself "never again", though I broke that promise a couple hours later. I didn't have a breakthrough the 2nd time, it was very close though. After exhaling another decent sized cloud with my girlfriend by my side with some music playing that had a hawt sounding girl, I instantly started having flashbacks, like I was going back into the void, though I instantly laid my head in her lap, holding her close while she pets my head. The void turned into this out of body experience, I was viewing this box (the room) with a bunch of geometry (furniture) inside, I saw this blob of lines that I assume was us cuddling up together, I go inside and see her, it felt like she carried me up through hell and into heaven. It was the most liberating feeling i've ever felt, god I fucking love her, she saved my life.

Overall, I've learned that I should probably control my impulses on this substance, breaking through isn't always needed, and most of all, BE FUCKING PREPARED YOU STUPID RETARD. I hope that experience doesn't ruin DMT for me. I used to not understand when people said "Oh god I can never do DMT again, I had a horrible trip on it". Every time prior, I felt at ease, that if the warm embrace of DMT is what it feels like when you're dying, then I'm completely content with death. Guess I should probably be ready when I die though.
George Greenshit - Wed, 20 Nov 2019 16:16:40 EST c+ot2hXd No.900098 Reply
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Thanks for the report, OP.
It seems to be rare that I hear of profoundly negative DMT experiences like this and it further drives home that shit always has the possibility to go the worst way imaginable at a moments notice.

Trip safe, people.
Reuben Hebberfoot - Thu, 21 Nov 2019 23:57:41 EST 2dhNEzix No.900116 Reply
My first Dmt trip was the only good one I've ever had. I was sitting in a very comfy camping chair at a festival and this guy dumps 2 huge scoops straight into the banger on my dab rig. It vaporized instantly and I took all of it in, and held onto it for as long as I could. Swirls started to form winding tighter and then loosening. By the 3rd loop of the swirls I was pulled into just pure nothingness. The next thing I remember was being some hyperdimensional caterpillar moving through a mucusy tunnel-cocoon. As I emerged from the tunnel I came back to my body and felt ethereal hands wiping away the cocoon mucus. Everyone had trippy faces and were asking me how I was doing. To this day I still question whether I'm in my first Dmt trip or if it ended and this is real life.
After that, nothing but terror. Next 2 trips I was in a state park in my area. First one by a small waterfall and pond I heard a giggle as I took in the hit and then fell into a trance. I came to and lifted my head to feel a strange non-physical substance, yet again like mucus but more like a web, wrapped all around my head. As I pulled myself out of the substance my thoughts became more clear. I heard the being scamper away though I could not see it and my friend who was with me said it was probably a water nymph playing with me. My second time I saw a cloaked figure with a walking stick in the woods staring at me from a distance. Barely seconds later I saw at least a dozen elvish looking creatures bumrush me from the trees behind the wizard lookin dude. As they entered my vision away from my peripherals they disappeared though I could feel their hands all over me. It was extremely uncomfortable but I just sat there at let it happened because what else am I gonna do.
Once a creek I was at turned into an Eldritch Lovecraftian horror scene. All the trees limbs started waving like tentacles, I saw 3 cloaked figures in plague doctor masks in the distance huddled together and staring at me, as well as the creek turning into an oily substance inhabited by a serpent so long you could see neither the tail nor the head, but it was definitely slithering through.
Once I was in a friend's bedroom and we were each taking some deem rips. After I took one hit the room started to fill with an ethereal fog. It looked as if the room was filled with layers of smoke that were waving with air currents. Instantly I had a feeling of sheer dread that my soul was being hunted by a being that now sensed me in the tripzone. Nausea overcame me and I had to rush to the bathroom.
My most recent trip, I was sitting on a sidewalk curb staring down a street trying out the ecig method of vaporizing. I was taking the tiniest hits to try and stay sub-visual. During the 2nd hit, which was yet again very small, I heard something land on the roof of the house behind me. I looked back and saw nothing so I turned back. I then heard the being land behind me and felt its presence rush me. I went from no visuals to instantly getting intense tracers, a bluish/purple hue to everything, and some of the worst paranoia and anxiety in my life. It felt like the being had its hands over me and was whispering mental energy into my head to keep me in a state of fear.
One of my homies has told me that he won't do Dmt anymore because it feels like he's doing something very wrong everytime, and he's had an experience where he had mostly dysphoric death like feelings throughout his whole body to the point he thought he had died. I read all these 'good' trip reports but honestly part of me thinks its a big fat hoax OR I'm literally still in the first deem trip OR I died/coma'd during that 1st trip and now I'm in purgatory. Just bad vibes all around.
Barnaby Shakefield - Fri, 22 Nov 2019 01:49:39 EST Cq+CZre/ No.900124 Reply
I have experienced the claymation reality and everything was different and flat and seemed very full but yet on dmt like, was like oh man this is kinda wierd
Isabella Pitthood - Fri, 22 Nov 2019 05:38:34 EST o2F12g4i No.900126 Reply
Damn, some of that sounds almost like some of the trips I've had on benadryl. (yeah I know pleb drug) I also saw a circle of cloaked figures, though it was on 28 pills of benadryl + a bottle of sizzurp. It was at my friends house out in the country that was supposedly haunted. It was like 11pm and they were standing around this bolder in his front lawn, only light source being this old looking light pole made of wood. Shit scared the fuck out of me, I thought deliriants were the pinnacle of mental strain. You definitely seen some fucked shit tho my dude.

Deliriants are like suspense-horror, you have a constant lingering dread that lasts hours. A bad DMT trip is like an acute precision mindfuck, all the anxiety is bundled up intoa 5-10 minute time span.

My girl says DMT has a mind of it's own, and that you gotta respect it, you can't treat it like a hedonistic indulgence, you got to be prepared, get that fuckin sage burnin.

That was one of the weirder things, it did feel somewhat dissociating, I feel like it's related to the out of body experience you can get on it.

I just hope DMT will be chill with me still, and that this isn't something that becomes normal for me. I wonder if drinking some blue lotus tea would help with anxiety without killing the trip.
Angus Puddlefudging - Fri, 22 Nov 2019 15:54:36 EST /BehNfGY No.900128 Reply
blue lotus should help.
I've extracted my own dmt last year and had 50+ trips of varying ranges from feeling a cool buzz to being annihilated by white light and being taken back to the big bang to relive everything over. I've for sure had some terrifying experiences and just thinking about them makes my heart race but I've had far far more wonderful and awe inspiring trips. I've taken breaks but I've gone back to it and lately it's pretty much all been great. just gotta be willing to accept anything before you ingest it. harder said than done really though.
Phineas Bickledale - Sat, 23 Nov 2019 17:50:40 EST o/OnKyOL No.900156 Reply
I had a similar experience on LSD. First time was absolutely terrifying, the worst fear I've ever felt, however in subsequent trips when experiencing something very similar again I was able to remind myself "you've been here before" and I knew I had lived through it and therefore everything would be fine in the end. You can turn these experiences into positive ones with a willingness to accept the weirdness for what it is and ride it out.

Reminding yourself that you'll be fine is difficult in the middle of a semi-breakthrough, but it gets easier with experience. Seasoned psychonauts recommend high doses if you're aiming for a breakthrough because getting stuck in a limbo state between reality and hyperspace can easily turn into a traumatizing experience. Herein lies the greatest danger posed by psychedelics. You're extremely unlikely to physically damage your body with them but the possibility of mental trauma became crystal clear to me after I had my soul-crushing bad trip. Given enough excursions into the deep end of the psychedelic experience, you are likely to have this sort of trip sooner or later. So the options you have are: either give up large doses or give up psychedelics altogether, or give it another shot and try learning to navigate in the chaos.
Frederick Drodgehone - Sat, 23 Nov 2019 18:10:28 EST c+ot2hXd No.900157 Reply
I think it's vital to never underestimate the power that the mind has to throw up horrors when recieving input and data that it cannot make sense of properly. In my experience the ego really dislikes having it's position at the ''top'' threatened or challanged so like a cornered animal, it will scream and shit and attack it.
Rebecca Honeywill - Sun, 24 Nov 2019 22:21:24 EST o2F12g4i No.900189 Reply
(OP here on different computer)
That's kinda what it felt like to me, I was completely not ready to be completely out of my body, it felt like I was bouncing between reality and the ethereal.
Eliza Carrydore - Mon, 25 Nov 2019 09:42:33 EST c+ot2hXd No.900202 Reply
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It could also be that on some level, you ego has a leg up on what it feels like to be destroyed as per your first experience where it seemed like you had no issues. You might just have to punch through with a very high dose so it doesn't have a chance to fuck with you.

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