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worst trip?

- Fri, 29 May 2020 22:58:02 EST 6oQ8Uuii No.903384
File: 1590807482049.gif -(2071882B / 1.98MB, 500x500) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size. worst trip?
what's the worst experience you have had with LSD (or what you thought was LSD)? have you ever had a panic attack while tripping?

>be me
>have done acid 3 times before
>decide to trip with friends, close friend has acid
>go to the beach
>friend starts crying
>anxiety takes over
>think friends dog is a monster
>think I am a caveman
>take off clothes
>somehow fall into a ditch that leads to a tunnel
>follow the light
>fall out of tunnel onto the beach
>break 11 bones, back, hip, arm, heels, etc
>by the time people found me it was dark and the tide was coming up
>6 months later and I'm still recovering
Hugh Wennerforth - Sat, 30 May 2020 00:56:20 EST 337IwFP3 No.903385 Reply
I've only used what I was reasonably certain was LSD about 20 or 30 times, and all very recently. Honestly I've had few bad experiences with hallucinogens in general, and most involve the use of dissociativies (either because 3-meo-pcp was so easy to overdo things on and I seem to have a high susceptibility to experiencing psychotic breaks or at least the symptoms of psychosis from using dopaminergic dissociatives that also act as high affinity sigma 1 receptor agonists like 3-meo and DXM, or I took DXM on several other substances, some of which is medicine, and they all act as substrates or potent inhibitors of CYP2D6 and I wound up getting moderate serotonin syndrome as a result).

Going forward knowing that, my worst experience isn't even one i really even classify ss a bad experience. I just have a bad habit of taking some when I get it rather than waiting and just taking a bunch on the weekend like I always plan to(work at a factory and my dealer works with me). The only two times it didn't actually improve the time I had at work, I had redosed probably at the wrong time and I wound up getting a little too confused about what I was doing and needed to be doing than I really found acceptable or desirable in hindsight. The only real time I can think of, I had gotten acid from my guy for the first time and was also taking it at work fo rthe first time, and they brought a new hire over for me to train just an hour or two after peaking. I coould think and plan ahead fine, but I couldn't talk worth a shit, so I kept stopping mid-sentence and telling the guy hold on a minute so I could stay caught up and let me think of collect my thoughts about what I was trying to say. Happened until about 3/4 through the 11 hour shift (and started at about 1/3 through it... training the guy, I mean). Normally I always know what to tell people when training them because some how I always get stuck on the jobs that new hires get selected for those particular nights, so I've trainined like 12 people on various jobx now and I'm usually great about knowing exactly what things would mess me up, or what things would probably mess somebody new up since I still learn new jobs and already know about 13 or 14 and have a pretty good mental model of how everything fits together on the entire line.

Luckily, despite being potentially moved to different jobs throughout the job night, I know all the ones I'm good at really well, usually having done them for at least 3-7 months straight at the very least (and that I'd actually get moved to, for that same reason) so well that I don't have to rely on thinking about what I'm doing even a little bit while working. All I need to do, I just stop thinking about it and my body takes control and knows what it needs to in order to do the job correctly. It's great for achieving some awesome flow states, especially during moments where I've got to go fast as fuck to keep the line running because something happened. That's why, if you plan to take psychedelics during work, you either need a job with no responsibility or work at all, or one at a factory where you've literally performed the same actions hundreds of thousands, if not millions of times.
Rebecca Dazzlelid - Sat, 30 May 2020 21:59:30 EST pG8zzweu No.903409 Reply
that sounds very awkward. I can't handle any anxiety while tripping (I once freaked out because I made eye contact with someone) so I can't imagine ever taking it while at work
thank you anon :) I hope there will be a next time. if there is, I'm probably going to get it tested to make sure I'm actually taking what I think I'm taking. might try microdosing mushrooms to start.
Alice Brossleridge - Sun, 31 May 2020 05:54:36 EST 337IwFP3 No.903413 Reply
Oh, it was, to be sure. i'm actually very comfortable tripping and typically in a much better mood than I normally would be otherwise, even when surrounded by people and at the work place. If anything, I'm in a better mood when I take it at work because I'm at the workplace, because the incompetence and bullshit you have to deal with working for that company is ridiculous... normally I'm pretty good at ignoring that kind of stupid shit, but it happens so much that it eventually gets to me from time to time, and when I take psychedelics (usually LSD since that's what my dude at work that sells to me usually has) i'm just not bothered by any of it to begin with at all.

Anyway, I digress. I was definitely a bit sketched out because it was my first time tripping at work, first time tripping in over 2 years, and because I work night shift at a factory... meaning a large percentage of the workforce is on drugs while at work.

At first I was actually pretty scared for a second because of how little I could actually manage to get out coherently (in the way of words), because I'm on drugs all the time at work anyway and I usually work so fast and hard everyday that from the outside looking in, at least at a glance, it would appear that I'm tweaking my balls off... all the loud and unnecessary shouting, cussing, and making a huge array of noises certainly doesn't help. Ironically, that's only how I am when I'm not tweaking, because when I am (got an addy script), I am completely silent all night and people ask me if I'm okay or upset or something. I know that they give me a pass because I literally work that way everyday, making it unlikely that my work ethic is a result of drug abuse, and the fact that at least 75-85% of the workers there are all lazy or just flat out suck and are shitty at their jobs.

So, that said, if I couldn't even manage to train a new hire (or even speak intelligibly to him), then that would draw the wrong kind of attention. Luckily, the 2 seconds of mild to moderate panic subsided pretty well instantly because I knew if I let The Fear take hold of me, I was fucked--I would stand no chance at being able to actually manage to do what I was told. I just started with the things I needed to teach him that I could actually see in front of me to get the train of thought rollin. It didn't really work too well, but it worked well enough. I just had to keep catching myself not even actually saying anything after starting a few words into a sentence and losing what I was supposed to say, because it didn't occur to me naturally that I should be covering for my confusion and befuddlement, remembering to say that I needed to catch up on what I was actually doing and collect my thoughts because the job requires a lot of multitasking (the bit about multitasking was just a bullshit excuse, but at the same time it's actually true... it's just that the multitasking is so easy for somebody that knows the job well that it should never have been an issue). Just had to keep apologizing and collect my thoughts over and over until about 3/4 through the 11 hour shift, where I had mostly regained my ability to concentrate on more than a single task and to effectively form and communicate coherent thoughts and sentences. I was playing it off as though I were a scatter-brained kind of dude and maybe even a bit awkward to interact with.
Henry Fabblefuck - Sun, 31 May 2020 19:41:35 EST KYqV2/6k No.903427 Reply
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Damn bro, if that's all true you're lucky to be alive my friend. How much did you take? That sounds like an absolute nightmare.

I've only had one "bad" trip. I say "bad" because it was nearly as awful as your experience. It was just absolutely fucking terrifying.

I was tripping on three hits of acid at a concert and when I came home I thought it would be a good idea to smoke some DMT. I eyeballed it and put wayyy too much in. Surely over 100mg's into a bowl with weed and split it with my girlfriend. I blacked out and don't remember most of it. It was just like sensory overload. I full on felt like I was dying though. I heard a female voice screaming at me, scolding me. It honestly felt like an eternity, damned to hell and being reprimanded for for choices I made in life. Finally when that was over, I came to, sobbing. Repeating "I'm so sorry!". I was a little shellshocked for a few weeks after that one and I know that experienced changed me a bit. I spent a year trying to piece that one together and it took a couple years before I decided to blast off again.
Lillian Fuckinghood - Mon, 01 Jun 2020 12:34:09 EST PTntYtii No.903441 Reply
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here's another for ya
I took about 150-200 micrograms but I'm almost certain it was mixed with some kind of dissociative. I'm very lucky to be alive.
ironically, other than all of my injuries, my trip was fantastic. I didn't feel any of the pain while I was tripping, I just noticed some strange discomfort after I fell. I didn't even realize that I fell down a ditch either. I might have been knocked unconscious. I had amazing visuals for the whole time I was in the tunnel. I looked at cracks in the rock and I could see rows of faces lining the tunnel. every patch of dirt that I looked at had imaginary worms crawling all over it. I remember knowing that I would die that day, and thinking that the same thing that happened to me had happened to all of my friends that were there. my friends, after watching me lose my mind and run away naked, probably had a worse trip than me. I'm looking forward to going back to that beach and sitting in the tunnel. I feel like that will be a very powerful experience.
Frederick Penningsit - Mon, 01 Jun 2020 13:27:16 EST ol3lKwZ/ No.903442 Reply
What dissociatives are supposed to fit on a blotter and don't give very noticeable taste at that?
Lillian Fuckinghood - Mon, 01 Jun 2020 15:34:21 EST PTntYtii No.903448 Reply
I'm not sure, what would be common to mix with LSD? (or have instead of LSD?) Honestly it felt like I may have done something like PCP. The fact that I didn't feel my bones breaking makes me think that there was some sort of depressant/dissociative. I imagine breaking bones on pure acid would be much more painful than if you were sober.
Also, does anyone here know of a good place that will test LSD? I found a place called DanceSafe but it looks like they will only test FOR LSD (Ehrlich reagent test I think). They don't test for things that may also be on the tab.
There's also a chance that it was pure acid but I just had a bad time, and I was in so much shock that I didn't feel pain. I'd like to get it tested either way.
Hannah Grandbury - Mon, 01 Jun 2020 16:46:55 EST 9JchIYMz No.903450 Reply
The Ehrlich test doesn't even test for LSD, it tests for the presence of indoles. Both tryptamines and lysergamides test positive, while phenethylamines (e.g. NBOMes, which are the most common adulterants) test negative, IINM.
In short, the test will only ever tell you that the tab you have in your hands is not laid with a completely different substance than what you wanted.

I think that to get a positive confirmation that a tab contains LSD and nothing but LSD you'd need to take it to a lab and get a spectroscopy done.

Anyway, I don't see anything in your story to suggest it was anything other than LSD. Sober people can break bones and not feel much pain for hours or even until the next day because of the adrenaline. This is a normal function of the body. If just breaking your bones immediately put you in so much pain you couldn't move, you would not be able to get yourself out of danger.
Frederick Penningsit - Mon, 01 Jun 2020 16:54:38 EST ol3lKwZ/ No.903451 Reply
pcp not on blotter bruh. I'm pretty sure there is no such dis actually cmiiw.
Fucking Figglewill - Mon, 01 Jun 2020 19:01:59 EST KYqV2/6k No.903456 Reply

It was pure acid most likely and you had a bad time. Was the tab bitter? Did it taste metallic and burn your tongue? If not it was probably LSD and you had a bad reaction to it. Psychedelics don't mix with everyone, but I assure you you're tabs weren't laced. Most drugs don't fit on a tiny piece of paper unless they are dosed in the micrograms. If it's on a piece of paper and it fucks you up, it's either NBOME, LSD, DOM, DOB or something like Etizolam. Shit happens, drugs usually aren't laced unless it's with fentanyl.
Phyllis Dumbleshit - Mon, 01 Jun 2020 23:59:35 EST j5mSp5Cb No.903464 Reply
Yeah it was tasteless, it was probably pure, but I want to get it tested just so I can know what I took considering what happened
Nathaniel Huvingwet - Fri, 05 Jun 2020 18:55:37 EST SltN3aiZ No.903563 Reply
OP update:
turns out it was an NBOMe
Jarvis Fanhall - Fri, 05 Jun 2020 20:49:26 EST ol3lKwZ/ No.903565 Reply
never been a big fan of it and always been a big fan of knowing what i am ingesting. goes with the territory in regards to the use of hallucinogens i reckon.
Charles Cresslechet - Fri, 05 Jun 2020 21:12:40 EST SltN3aiZ No.903566 Reply
yep, I learned my lesson about making sure you know what you're taking. NBOMe does not sit well with me
Leonard of Mushrooms - Sat, 06 Jun 2020 03:54:34 EST QbaXXClN No.903568 Reply
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This isn't my worst trip, that ones kind of hard to explain.

But regarding negative trip issues there's something i'd like to mention that I don't know if it's just not common knowledge due to the nature of how far out i'm talking about or if it doesn't effect everyone the same (though I have heard one other person say they had the same, the steamin' hot same, and I am thinking i'd find more if more people took crazy doses or if I can find more of them to speak with...)

So... if you take an extremely high heroic dose of a psy, and I do mean extremely not just like high heroic, there seems to be a fair chance that you are so wiped out afterwards that you will shit yourself while you sleep like the dead for the next like ~18 hours.
I've had it happen twice, and it was liquid shit both times.
Does this count as la purga? lol
But yeah just wanted to warn you guys in case anyone ever feels compelled to do this but also has a nice mattress.

here's a semi-related video of a guy just going into megadoses. I'm only like 10 minutes in so sorry if it sucks, but he seems pretty cool and i rarely ever hear anyone speak about megadosing (especially on purpose), so I figured i'd share it with you guys
Hugh Lightwell - Thu, 18 Jun 2020 09:29:40 EST wqqRRAxV No.903721 Reply
>usually drop acid by myself at home and have a good time listening to music, staring at the wall melt, etc
>decide to go drop at a casino with a "friend"
>said friend turns out to still be a tweaker
>cant just fucking relax and have a good time
>ruins my trip with bullshit
what a waste of LSD that was
Phoebe Grandridge - Thu, 18 Jun 2020 18:29:04 EST cyvkttaV No.903723 Reply
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i can relate, all the times i´ve had acid at casinos, like 4 or 6 times have been with a friend who is a meth-fiend. not a bad trip but just wasted drops.

Also i enjoy doing small doses of lucy at work, i used to work at a state park taking care of plants and giving tours so it was very chill.
Now i work as a health and safety supervisor at a big scale hotel, the last time i dropped we were doing some fire drills burning cardboards at a shared parking lot with other hotel....all i can say its i was a little bit anxious, by the time i got back to my office i couldnt stop smiling at a meeting but still had a good time
Awe' !!Bwteoy2D - Sun, 21 Jun 2020 07:25:53 EST ol3lKwZ/ No.903761 Reply
Yeah I took high doses. IME I haven't shat myself but I puked my guts out and when the trip was over my mouth was so dry that the dryness went all the way to my stomack. I was dry like a cracker. Funny times. But the most unbelievable thing was that I came down. That wasn't the first breakthrough, but I went far on that one so it was trully unbelievable the contrast. And it was sudden. I was just there back to being human again which was really a miraculous thing it seemed to me at the time. Altho I was too exhausted to be surprised, it was just a fact and it was hard to believe.
Shrekit - Sun, 21 Jun 2020 08:20:07 EST VtcsO3sJ No.903763 Reply
Only bad trip I would say was the "worst" trip was on always suspect tabs. NBOMe's of some sort most of the time. The worst one sent me to the hospital and to this day I don't know if it was really high dosed LSD or and RC I have never tried before.

>be me
>walking to park after popping some "tabs"
>"tabs" were from a source who had send me blank blotters before
>"I'll send you some good ones"
>get more duds, really low dosed but positive on Elrich for an LSD like substance
>also get "extra hook up" tab
>tab larger than normal
>tasted metallic but not bitter
>walk back home
>be at park
>trip out weird on stupid retard mode
>say things to strangers at park
>say "help me"?
>wake up on a stretcher in the ER
>hear rate going really high
>feel dead
>feel limbs going numb
>given fluids to wash out whatever was in me
>say I had a heartattack
>then they say I had a stroke
>all I know is I ate that big tab and everything went to shit afterwards
Cedric Seblingkare - Sun, 21 Jun 2020 21:47:53 EST nQJqKzRt No.903771 Reply
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>NBOMe's of some sort
Sounds like 25i couldve caused ur bad time and journey into hospitol
James Huddleket - Mon, 22 Jun 2020 01:24:13 EST /va1VDfd No.903775 Reply
Heres my strongest shittiest lsd trip. Might be kinda long and boring but I want to type it out to remember it. It was the worst trip I ever had in my life and was 1p-lsd from online. I had taken 2 tabs 2 nights before and had the best time ever. First time taking acid and was so fucking amazed at how beautiful it was. Never in my life saw shit like that from mushrooms. I saw crystals dripping from trees and egyptian eyes/hieroglyphs everywhere and actual like psychedelic colors flashing everywhere. I saw the sexiest girls Ive ever seen fucking each other in the background of my tapestry on my walls, like it was a video. I had no idea it was so much more visual than mushrooms and had the best most beautiful time ever. So two days later I wanna trip again and take 2 more tabs expecting a light trip from tolerance. About an hour later feel nothing, so figure I need a bunch more to feel equivalent of two tabs, so I go ahead and eat about 6ish more tabs. oh god why. sometime later I realize I fucked up and it is coming on very very very strong. I freak out and smoke a little weed to relax. The weed intensifies it immediately about 1500x and I realize that there are like aliens or these beings in my room watching me and they know I see them now and I have this flash of realization that they are actually fucking real and I realized I made myself go insane forever. I freak the fuck out, take off my cloths, turn off the lights, get into bed and try to go to sleep. I knew that the moment that I close my eyes I will completely fucking blast off and go somewhere crazy, so I asked the aliens to please be nice and closed my eyes. And then there was a short period of good trip here. I realized It was completely out of control at this point so I let go and relaxed, and the moment I did that Everything got really soft and I stopped being scared and I had a really awesome time, dont really remember much of this part but I thought I was dead and broke the whole universe, like caused the apocalypse basically and life had just been a fake joke simulation type thing leading up to this point where I realized it wasn't real and it ended. Then when I opened my eyes again about an hour later is when it got so so shitty. I sat up in my bed and could not fucking figure out wtf was going on. I could not form a thought and then got trapped in the classic bad trip thought loops where I was basically looking at the same places and thinking the same thoughts over and over in about 1 minute loops for like 3-5 hours. It would not stop and I could not figure out what the fuck was going on. There was one part of the loop that was happy and optimistic but it was followed by the thought that all my happy thoughts were just delusional thinking and they will always break down into depression. Went on forever and eventually the loops started to fall apart and went to bed and haven't done lsd since.
Cedric Seblingkare - Mon, 22 Jun 2020 02:41:01 EST nQJqKzRt No.903776 Reply
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> I realized It was completely out of control at this point so I let go and relaxed, and the moment I did that Everything got really soft and I stopped being scared and I had a really awesome time,
Good I think this is what people should do when having a bad time, did they ever consider letting go, then possibly, enjoying it even?

But I think ya dun goofed with the excessive amounts and weed smokery but damn soujnds like a hell of a ride you went on

>thought I was dead and broke the whole universe,
maaate i've had this so many times on Ketamine literally "oh SHIT i've BROKEN hte universe and i'm at ground zero for it beginning, all time space and matter are being compressed into nothing or is this a glitch and i've broken it, now i've really done it"

Maybe try ket you don't really feel fear in the same way weirdly enough but it can be terrifyingg
Caroline Wimblefoot - Mon, 22 Jun 2020 15:24:37 EST 4tUTTc+v No.903781 Reply
>Maybe try ket you don't really feel fear in the same way weirdly enough but it can be terrifyingg
true for dxm too
Angus Dongerpeck - Mon, 22 Jun 2020 23:18:54 EST nQJqKzRt No.903782 Reply
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guys ive never had a bad trip but i havent tripped around other ppl, currently statin wirh my sister and her bf and have some tabs. anyone got experience of first trip around otherd in thr real world? i might not do it
Walter Fucklenin - Tue, 23 Jun 2020 00:13:28 EST 9JchIYMz No.903783 Reply
As long as they're trustworthy and you know they're not going to give you shit during the trip, I say go for it. At the very least you need to be able to ask them to leave you and they leave you alone, in case you find them unbearably annoying. Establish some ground rules beforehand, don't just drop the tabs and go "surprise, I'm on psychedelics! Please accommodate me in my vulnerable state!"
Angus Dongerpeck - Tue, 23 Jun 2020 00:24:51 EST nQJqKzRt No.903784 Reply
well yes to be fair i did ask if i had a trip at somepoint tey said yeah, both of em smoke weed every day and share it with me but i dont smoke much at all.

its more that i dont embarass myself i guess, or bring shame
Walter Fucklenin - Tue, 23 Jun 2020 00:34:06 EST 9JchIYMz No.903786 Reply
Well, that's unpredictable, isn't it? No one knows when they'll have a bad trip until they're already having it. If you're not comfortable with that risk just wait until you're in a position where you can trip by yourself. If you do decide to trip you'll probably want to avoid smoking. Anxiety and bad trips are more common when combining LSD and cannabis, and you'd already be in an unfamiliar environment.
Angus Dongerpeck - Tue, 23 Jun 2020 00:40:12 EST nQJqKzRt No.903787 Reply
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>avoid smoking. Anxiety and bad trips are more common when combining LSD and cannabis, and you'd already be in an unfamiliar environment
very good, yea ill just be sticking with lsd and a cigarette if i feel it like i generally do.
i do have a good selection of benzos on hand mind you. They wont be tripping so it might feel isolated in that im the lnly one tripping naybe but theyre a good laugh when ttheyre. high

i also have dexedrine and wondered if takin it ln acid would be focused and cool if its worse the risk as if one is having a bad trip one crrtainly doesnt want to be om amphetamines
Angus Dongerpeck - Tue, 23 Jun 2020 00:44:56 EST nQJqKzRt No.903788 Reply
>>903787*worth the risk of making a bad trip worse with dexamfetamine
Fanny Pickham - Tue, 23 Jun 2020 20:49:01 EST nQJqKzRt No.903799 Reply
wait whag if wait foe them to flnto bed and tripp talking tobfrienss onndiscord?
Shit Foffingnedge - Tue, 23 Jun 2020 20:52:06 EST yhmEXgdd No.903800 Reply
I thought I needed to go to the hospital when I took 2 tabs of 25i that I thought was LSD and my vision started to blur and shake involuntarily along with my vision turning a reddish purple and it freaked me out
Shit Foffingnedge - Tue, 23 Jun 2020 20:53:55 EST yhmEXgdd No.903801 Reply
I was also high on it for 2 days literally 48 hours and it gave me contorted visuals along with the breathing walls etc. I also had to park my car around the block while tripping on it the next day and driving it was the most bizarre experience and I realize I coulda killed someone, it felt like I was all the way in the back seat and my vision stretched on for miles and somehow the road seemed to stretch on forever even though the block was relatively short and that was a really wild ride.
Fanny Pickham - Tue, 23 Jun 2020 21:17:32 EST nQJqKzRt No.903802 Reply

I meant what if wait to go to my bed then trip while theyre asleep?
Fanny Pickham - Tue, 23 Jun 2020 21:34:03 EST nQJqKzRt No.903803 Reply
i meant wait until they go to sleep then they start tripping
Fanny Pickham - Tue, 23 Jun 2020 22:05:13 EST nQJqKzRt No.903807 Reply
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Actualyl is tripping in a silent and or dark room advisable?
Rebecca Dandershit - Wed, 24 Jun 2020 00:23:53 EST 9JchIYMz No.903811 Reply
Are you retarded? You know keyboards are used with you fingers, not with your face, right?

You'll have to try it to find out. For me personally lighting or sound doesn't seem to make much of a difference.
Phyllis Drallerhine - Fri, 26 Jun 2020 14:23:38 EST pfpAGzJC No.903869 Reply
that sounds terrifying. I technically drove on acid once, I felt sober enough to drive back home, and I was sober the whole time driving, but as soon as I got out of the car and sat down I started tripping again
Baltazaras Aklasis - Sun, 28 Jun 2020 16:45:26 EST kfiGoZKH No.903903 Reply
My worst experience on acid was tripping outside when it was 28 °C and really humid that day.
I was outside from ~10 until ~21h.
Around the peak I smoked a joint and descended down from a forest on a hill to the river, I didn't take a hat with me (because I was stupid and wanted to carry as little weight as possible), instead I had a bandanna, which I was too lazy to tie around my head.
The sun fucked me up hard. I soon realised I needed to go back into the shade of the woods, but to get there I had to climb.
As I was climbing a steep path I felt as if there was a sharp wooden pole stabbed in the top of my head, and with each step I took it was being pushed down further into my skull.
I could not carry on and reached a safe spot via different route. When I got there I spent about an hour or so stressing out and thinking how to cool myself down.

I know what you're probably thinking:
Mate, you're a grade A moron, you could have just jumped into the river

If only you saw how tormented, shallow and dirty the river looked that day...
David Bummersud - Sun, 28 Jun 2020 18:38:52 EST 337IwFP3 No.903904 Reply
I haven't really had any bad experiences on LSD. The worst was either having to train a new hire at work while trippin balls or an experience that I had that wasn't on acid, but 3-MeO-PCP and DPT (of course, now that I got a plug on shrooms and acid I've tripped while at work pretty regularly now actually and trained at least 3 new hires will trippig face... kinda pushing my luck with how far gone I was last time combining piracetam, mushrooms, and LSD... didn't expect the piracetam to intensify the trip literally 2 or 3x like people were saying, figured they were exaggerating lol... one of the best trips I've ever had though heh).

Nos, when I say it was one of my worst trip experiences, I don't mean at all that I didn't enjoy the trip--it's quite the opposite. This was the trip of all trips, I know for absolute certain that this kind of experience can only occur with such intensity, profundity, and power once in a person's life time. It was like a trip I was destined to have (considering the fundamental tenets of quantum theory and shit are such that it requires the universe to be deterministic,. I suppose it was). I had blacked out by accident because I guess I accidentally dosed too much 3-MeO-PCP, and when I came to I was no longer a part of universe that I had believed to exist, I was a being of pure energy. Every time I'd move, it were as if the energy I was composed of was constantly cycling between annihilation and reconstruction/rebirth. With every bit of distance I transitioned spatially, it were as if I had to destroy and rebuild/rebirth myself at each step. Actually, that's not the right way to describe it. It was just most noticeable while moving.

Rather, with each passing quanta of time all the way down to the planck scale, in order to move forward through the passage of time, I had to destroy what I was... I had to remove the boundaries of my form and reuturn from an orderly state to one of chaos. Simultaneously, I would then have to recreate and reshape myself back into the new, ever so slightly updated reconfiguration of my component energy/matter. The process was done through a sheer will to power, the will to exist and to be born, to forge myself back together with each passing moment into the shape/form I desired to become. This will to power, the will to live, survive, to exist, and to manipulate the surrounding existenxe was so intensely powerful that it felt violent. Violent is the only word I can come up with to describe it, but it isn't accurate enough. It's not that I willed to commit violence or to inflict damage on anybody or anything. What I mean is that this sheer intensity and power behind this will I used to continue existing by continuously annihilating and reonstructing myself was the equivalent of an unstoppable primal force, in all its unfiltered unconscious crudeness. That will only sought one thing, endlessly obssessively and single-mindedly. If that will to power had manifested in the desire or at least the action/behavior of attacking somebody or something, then there wouldn't have been any stopping me.

When I first came to, I would have lost all contorl because the intensity of the will to power, but there was somebody speaking to me using the image (or at least the voice) of my father. What it actually told me was bad and would've caused some fucked up shit to happen if I had actually listened to what it wa ssaying, but instead hearing it speak to me and say the things it was triggered a sudden feeling of taking part in some kind of destined "ritual" or something... again, not the right word to describe it. The voice was telling me to remember, to remember, and to get violent. From the outside looking in, it would seem like it was trying to get me to hurt somebody, but instead I remembered them as words I had been told before my birth, and that I'd been told an unknown, even incomprehensible number of times in the past, always before my birth. Eventually this event I was experiencing would take place, and then I would be awakened to the lessons and knowledge I'd been taught (or maybe learned myself?).

As far as how it felt having to annihilate and reconstruct myself and shit, it felt like I was manipulating a field around me beforehand, and then I would just "slide" or "flow" into place. It was an extremely contradictory feeling of flowing like a river gracefully through time and space without effort, but having apply the unstoppabl force and intensity of the will to power to force the field to manipulae around me accept my flow into that location. It was both the most impossibly difficult and effortlessly easy thing to do ever. It felt as though I were both controlling my actions through the eill, but also somehow simultaneously taking part in a predetermined event that has played out now ad infinitum across the infinite vastness of the whole of existence in a deterministic universe where free will isn't just mostly illusory, but entirely illusory. Somehow the contradiction didn't bother me, it seemed expected, yet somehow the reality of both controlling myself at that time through the will to power freely as i desired and not having any say in my actions as I was taking part in a dance or recital as though part of a play on the world's stage. Normally while sober I will simply opt not to really dwell almost certainly not having free will, but at that moment I felt as though I had become unrestricted to do as I pleased... while still every move I made, every breath I took, and every thought I had was pretedermined and had played out so many times that counting wasn't a possibliity.
David Bummersud - Sun, 28 Jun 2020 18:39:23 EST 337IwFP3 No.903905 Reply
I also experienced something else besides that voice, it was the distinct and clear mental impression of a glowing grey round thing that was really more of an impossible shape than round, and for some reaosn I "knew" it was magnetic or had to do with magnets... and also it was God. I take the magnet part to mean it had to do with electrons or something I guess. I don't know if was God as in the ALL or a god that, by definition had to be below the ALL/God because the ALL is all. I tend to believe the latter because a being/existence such as the ALL is beyond symbols and duality, and wouldn't possess an image or form, like i Observed, in order to signify its presence/existence.

Anyway, all of that was the good part of the trip, it was fucking amazing and I could experience something like that again in life. The bad part was that I did those drugs when I was a pathetic fuck up failure burn out living with my parents and I was unresponsive for a little bit so they tried forcefully waking me up and I grabbed my dad while apparently looking crazy as shit and started shouting repeated loops of phrases repeatedly, prompting my parents to call the police. This led to me being pretty much tackled by two of them, and a total of 5 were at my house. One had his knee kneeling into my back and told me they were going to tranquilize me, to which my stupid psychotic ass started yelling a new phrase loop about giving me "morphine, amphetamine, tranq me", etc. Turns out they tranquilized me twice based on the two different scabs I had... I suppose they injected me with hydroxyzine (which was a pretty good call considering it's a pretty potent 5-ht2a antagonist and would counteract the psychedelic effects of the DPT at the very least on top of the antihistamine effect calming me down). Then I got cuffed to a stretcher and put in an ambulance and was driven to a hospital. The whole trip some faggot was frekaing out yelling at me, asking what i took, "HEY YOU CAN'T BE DOIN THIS SHIT BUD, DID YOU TAKE ACID, MUSHROOMS? YOu CAN'T BE DOIN DUMB SHIT LIKE THIS FUCKIN UP MAN, WHAT DID YOU TAKE? I USED TO DO IT MYSELF AND HAD TO STOP DOIN THAT SHIT, CAN'T BE FUCKIN UP LIKE THIS BUD. wHAT DID YOU TAKE?" I had come down within minutes of being tranquilized, which was right on the way to the hospital, so I was too disappointed in myself and upset about how much the fuckin cuff being cuffed to something behind me forcing my arm to bend in a way arms aren't meant to bend hurt, so I didn't even acknowledge him. I just looked around bewildered and like I didn't know what was going on. Thankfully nothing came of it. My parents came to the hospital, they looked at me and were like, "well, he seems fine now, you all can leave if you like", so we left and I went back home and slept like a goddamn baby from the tranq (hydroxyzine?). Didn't have to give up my RC stash or anything.

Overall, even the whole police thing didn't bother me either, at least not at the time it was happening. The whole scene played out as it was scripted to play out, as I said. It felt absolutely right and meant to be that it happened the way it did, and the experience itself was so amazing and once-in-a-lifetime that I honestly don't regret it happening... other than scaring my parents and shit. That part I'm upset about, but overall the magnitude of the amazing good of the experience easily outweighs that disappointment inymself and regret.

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