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420chan is Getting Overhauled - Changelog/Bug Report/Request Thread (Updated July 26)

The US Is A Bunch of Dumb Racist Dicks

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- Thu, 09 May 2019 02:14:53 EST ZLKpSfEG No.529293
File: 1557382493266.jpg -(42079B / 41.09KB, 369x640) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size. The US Is A Bunch of Dumb Racist Dicks
Eugene Willard Coleman is a rapist.
I'm going to sue the pants off of you people.
Criminal Negligence
Civil Rights Violation

I don't give a shit.
Hugh Shittingcocke - Thu, 09 May 2019 06:36:43 EST g5vUBZWF No.529295 Reply
Well yeah, everybody happens to be racist dicks. This isn't unique to the us

Sad as fuck

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- Wed, 08 May 2019 03:55:35 EST loFqoohq No.529266
File: 1557302135053.jpg -(1294288B / 1.23MB, 2580x1042) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size. Sad as fuck
Feeling down and I know it's probably because I was abusing DXM these past three days in a row but fuck me if I don't feel like absolute shit.

I got no family near by, no friends, and nothing to do. I literally feel little to no pleasure from everyday activities right now.

I just want a hug from a friend. I'm literally about to take a dab and create a neopets account because i'm so lonely.

What do besides eat well, sleep well, and smoke well?
Matilda Degglehatch - Wed, 08 May 2019 13:43:42 EST SvrL9OfC No.529276 Reply
I don't know, deal with it? This is a pretty common problem with a lot of drugs, especially stimulants. If the loneliness, depression, and anhedonia is all drug induced, then it usually goes away in about 2 or 3 days and by a week's time you're fine again.

If you haven't figured out how to deal with this on your own yet by now then you should probably just avoid using all the good drugs out there, because they all cause these same exact effects. Where you're at is honestly just par for the course my nigga, I just deal with it till it goes away, move on, more than likely do drugs again, and repeat the cycle. So if this isn't something you're into, quit while you actually can.
Matilda Degglehatch - Wed, 08 May 2019 13:45:12 EST SvrL9OfC No.529277 Reply
>This is a pretty common problem with a lot of drugs, especially stimulants
regarding stimulants, these effects are far worse from them so you probably ought to steer clear the fuck away from them altogether

Relationship Anxiety

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- Tue, 30 Apr 2019 18:30:42 EST MFpyraEH No.529135
File: 1556663442734.jpg -(160613B / 156.85KB, 1280x1024) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size. Relationship Anxiety
I have always had anxiety, depression, and anger issues. It is only within the last few years that I have had any chance to work on myself. I have my first intimate relationship with a woman at 20yrs old and obviously it comes with anxiety for me. Recently I had a mental breakdown with all the stress in my life and telling her that she has told me to get help (which I have started today) and she was angry, and tired. I didn't drop all that at the best time. After all that she has seemingly been emotionally distant from me. She has alot of stress in her life and not having a girlfriend before and having anxiety it kinda runs me up a wall. I don't know if it has to do with because of what I did or not. She says that it isn't but I am still concerned. Am I just worrying about nothing. She still seems like she loves me, just, not as happy. I don't know, am I just worried about nothing?
3 posts omitted. Click View Thread to read.
Isabella Buzzwill - Sat, 04 May 2019 13:31:03 EST loFqoohq No.529208 Reply
Of course! It’s definitely becuZ she hasn’t had her yearly 10 day fast. She should get on it. And while I’m at it you should try a ten day fast too!
Isabella Buzzwill - Sat, 04 May 2019 13:31:03 EST loFqoohq No.529209 Reply
Of course! It’s definitely becuZ she hasn’t had her yearly 10 day fast. She should get on it. And while I’m at it you should try a ten day fast too!

When you don't fit in with the culture you're around

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- Tue, 30 Apr 2019 00:42:38 EST 72N5BQUN No.529117
File: 1556599358056.jpg -(200302B / 195.61KB, 1782x1201) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size. When you don't fit in with the culture you're around
> used to be denenerate 420partypartygirl erry day
> got into nursing program in the southern US
> suddenly surrounded by religious normal folk who are very nice but quite bland
> boyfriend is also like this and kind of a weeb (I am not) but I love him anyway
> his friends are all weebs, they talk about anime and memes and basically just repeat what they see on the internet, play board games for fun and don't drink and shit
> don't fit it in at all, miss degenerate shenanigans and find people here extremely boring

I probably just need an attitude change but it's nice to vent. I'm sure someone here has felt left out by normal culture/normal subcultures e.g., anime, vidya games, etc. or have transitioned out of regeneracy, right? Trying not to feel alone rn ;_; Any advice on dealing with this without becoming or coming off as standoffish/withdrawn/unfriendly?
18 posts and 2 images omitted. Click View Thread to read.
Nell Dregglecocke - Mon, 06 May 2019 04:53:23 EST wVOg00D7 No.529226 Reply
Change your outlook. I don't believe your statement. It's not something you can easily quantity of prove, simply that you "feel" using your limited experience filtered by your selection bias. You didn't exist before technology, you simply see the very best of what we did from 200 years ago and assume that doesn't represent the best of the best.

Anyway you don't need to change the world. Just find something you can find that passion for. The first step is to stop making big dumb dismissive sweeping statements and believing they matter. You're just reinforcing your own negativity. Instead lets look at your critiques and try to figure out what you're actually upset about. Work out what it is you feel is missing and get it.

>what is "humanity in our labour"
>how do I quantify and express passion

Then work out what you like doing, or can do that you can apply the above to. Or try stuff until you can. You'd be surprised where you can find humanity and passion in work and I suspect you're dismissing it in many fields where it is there, but honestly that doesn't even matter. What matters is what you're going to do. There has been a rise of artisanal crafts, plenty of people run their own businesses and that is exactly the things you're saying are missing. Passion, humanity, craft, meaning in work. I think to some extent technology does remove the room for these in certain processes but only as the human requirement falls. As such people have moved to new careers and paths almost as matter of course.
Frederick Chorrynetch - Tue, 07 May 2019 17:26:23 EST Z2Vs3t8e No.529262 Reply
This is one thing I never realized until I started trying to be an adult.
The weekend isn't long enough to party like I want to, and you can't just show up to work still frying from the day before.
Clara Fupperford - Wed, 08 May 2019 09:52:06 EST 6PEc3fTQ No.529272 Reply
Depends where you work and how good you are at your job even while fried or still frying from the day before

Douche bag friend

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- Thu, 02 May 2019 21:11:55 EST h/FkqyiH No.529182
File: 1556845915723.png -(27556B / 26.91KB, 1092x1037) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size. Douche bag friend
What do i do if the only friend i have is a douche? Is it better to just chill alonei

The person always openly brags about shit in my life that sucks but good in his and my life is a fucking disaster

Its really fucking annoying. And everything they have is just handed to them they are legitatemly mentally disabled and cant earn or do anything on their own but they think the shit they have is just as good as having earned it

Is it better to chill with a douche bag or completely alone?

Also i feel them hating the success of others so every time something good happens i just feel them wanting to rip it away or that i would lose it and its just depressing

I want to start bragging 24/7 about stupid shot but I am not enthusiastic fucking poor people dude
8 posts omitted. Click View Thread to read.
Basil Hezzleford - Mon, 06 May 2019 05:49:11 EST SvrL9OfC No.529227 Reply
tell him you aren't going to argue about it like a little fucking bitch and then don't argue about it anymore. i'm not saying to argue with him more, just to stop letting him get away with being such an enthusiastic douche bag without knowing you at least in some way actively protest the behavior and find it retarded and enthusiastic.

...you know, not just rolling over and taking it, or letting him still control the situation by getting you to engage in some kind of enthusiastic arguing match you don't want to be in. shut him down. usually shaming people works best, unless he's literally enthusiastic.

if that's the case, there's no conquering enthusiasm i'm afraid. give up on this dude
Fucking Billingspear - Tue, 07 May 2019 01:47:38 EST SIrZu/c1 No.529246 Reply
it's just money people view it differently because of different things that happened in their through their eyes in terms of money.

you are being just as much an autist for thinking money is a given and doesn't create other problems man
Jenny Greenridge - Tue, 07 May 2019 18:04:24 EST UZC9gHak No.529263 Reply
oh no i literally have said dude stop being a douche bag or stop being fucking annoying or im gonna punch you and he just says I DONT KNOW WHAT THE FUCK IM DOING DOOD

he might legit just be retarded no way he doesnt realize hes not an ass hole though. i have been completely ignoring him.

yes he has literal enthusiasm

Double trouble: Can't talk unless drunk, and no friends since long ago.

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- Mon, 06 May 2019 18:08:58 EST 4VrAyNJw No.529240
File: 1557180538467.jpg -(160504B / 156.74KB, 1280x720) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size. Double trouble: Can't talk unless drunk, and no friends since long ago.
Usually when sober, I dont' talk, or communicate at all. I may think about it, but there is a constant voice, self-critical, telling myself it's useeless. Nobody cares either way, and it won't change anything, it's just empty words being yelled into a void.

But when I drink, this self-critical voice dies, it melts, it evaporates. I'm there now. My rational real self would tell this present self to shut the fuck up, delete all of this, don't post it, don't even consider it, because I won't even come back here and read any replies since I won't remember typing it.

And that's the whole problem. I had in mind other things to say, that I'm poor, that my whole youth I played video games online and all my friends were online friends, and then I stopped gaming due to depression and anxiety, and I lost contact with all of them. Never got a job or anything like that. Now I'm basically on disability benefits because I'm too I don't know, they tell me I have high functioning enthusiasm but I'm not fully sure yet.

Either way. Rambling is a part of how I become in this state of mind, and so I'm doing it now. Keytapping is too loud tho so gotta stop soon or I will get annoyed. Had something to say, let me think briefly.

Okay. I have zero friends. ZERO. Never talk to anybody really. Can go days without using my voice to vibrate the air. It feels in some ways that I am actually dying, because I am and we all are, but it's like I'm outside life somehow,, not suicidal, just not living, kind of like I've come to see al

SEE FUCK IT - I just pushed backspace on a full paragrph because of hesitation and self-doubt. I DON*T KNOW WHAT TO DO.

I can't communcate unless I am drunk, I'm like a fucking undead zombie just waiting for permanent release in actual void-death. The body functions, I breathe and eat, and WAIT... this endless WAIT for something that never comes, a solution to the problem of suffering, some kind of peace of mind, a silence in the mind, a lack of thought, some fuckiing escape from this absolute nonsense.

but it does't come, and then I somehow sometimes end up onthis site, to type my stream of consciosuenss nonsnse... I feel myself getting drunker as I'm typing this, less wanting to remove delete what I write, I.. This becomes more nonsense as time goes on, sorry

I'm truly sorry for this. Apologize and o sforth. So Forth, be precise peice of shit.

I am too distant in life; I escape, always. Have panic attacks, apathy, deep fear, lots of SHAME. Never feel like I can be myself, want to kill my SELF, but not MYSELF, you know? This idealized image of myself that protects myself ; my SELF protects MYSELF, so to speak. Have a mask I wear always, alcohol dissolves mask. Weed makes mask more fun to wear, but still wear it.

Like animals, afraid of people. Not sure ewhat else to say, people are animals tho so that does not make sense

should maybe post in /b/-random, did earlier few days ago tho and somebody told me /qq/ so here I am now, maybe probably shoudlnt post at all cause drunk etc-- fucking nonsense doesnt make sense rambling bullshit piece of shit

Simon Dammlepod - Mon, 06 May 2019 18:37:11 EST h0psPJz3 No.529241 Reply
Fuck dude that's a pretty serious problemo. Social anxiety to the point of being mute.

The bad news is that the only way to confront your anxiety is through exposure. You need to talk and talk and talk. Booze just increases your anxiety when you aren't drunk and reinforces that you need to drink.

I'm surprised you arent on benzos tbh.
Martin Sobberwire - Mon, 06 May 2019 23:38:17 EST JCATCBbz No.529245 Reply
>>529241 Exposure is my suggestion as well, OP. Try not to enable alcoholism by telling yourself fallacies like, "I need to drink in order to function." Instead just start mumble rapping to yourself when you're alone, then talk to yourself consistently aloud when not strictly alone, and ultimately you will graduate to a conversational communicator. I highly stress the danger of instructions you give yourself. Whatever you believe you will behave and affirm. Try thinking to yourself. What thoughts are they? Instead like I suggest just try to vocalize those same statements or blurbs. Do it often enough and you'll become a loquacious babbler in no time. Great luck and good wiggles, buddy. Also come back and tell us what's up when you get a chance to.

How do I break up?

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- Sun, 05 May 2019 19:08:56 EST meKKp2Ju No.529220
File: 1557097736286.jpg -(58574B / 57.20KB, 630x630) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size. How do I break up?
So, I date this over-weight girl. It's really fucking embarrassing but I've had it with her shit. She's 3 years younger than me(23 years old) and I'm not even sexually attracted to her in the slightest. She has some mental problems and is fucking crazy, she drives like a fucking lunatic and when you call her out on it she claims she does it because she doesn't care and wants to lose her life(what a fucking idiot) she's always in her feelings, needs constant validation, have a mental breakdown if I don't respond to her messages and just in general always is on some dramatic bullshit. A few days ago I tried to step back and get some distance after I got into an argument with her when she came over to my house and wanted to search my computer. I kinda ignored her over a couple of days and today asks if she can come over and I told her I was busy to which she tells me she's already 5 minutes away(she lives 45 mins away). She shows up and has a cut mark on her leg and said how depressed and anxious she's been and wanted to make sure things were okay with us. I thought I made it out of the woods but clearly not and I tried to tell her how it was and it started with the tears and shit. I feel like if I leave her she's going to do some stupid shit thus forcing me to stay in the relationship. How the fuck do I get out of this shit?
8 posts and 1 images omitted. Click View Thread to read.
Beatrice Fenderham - Mon, 06 May 2019 18:54:54 EST JCATCBbz No.529242 Reply
Pass her off onto someone you don't like - like a booger!
>"You're it!"
!scyTheNg3k - Mon, 06 May 2019 22:36:41 EST /U8zYy3Q No.529244 Reply
>I thought I made it out of the woods but clearly not and I tried to tell her how it was and it started with the tears and shit.

there's various advice i could give about the relationship problems you're dealing with, but you want to break up, so i confine my post.

expect her to cry and yell; accept that she will. visualize her crying and yelling at you before you actually break up with her. fact is, if you've anticipated it, it'll be easier to deal with. don't avoid thinking about the hard parts; think about those, specifically. but also, think about how happy you'll be to have finally told her to leave.

now in my opinion it's respectful to give an honest reason for leaving, but any criticisms you make should be brief and serious, and you should not try to explain or justify your opinion. in this case she's controlling and irresponsible and those two words are more than enough by themselves. avoid minor criticisms like "selfish", "dramatic", "insecure", "fat"; they're never helpful.

or just ghost her i mean it's 420chan there's 99 easy ways and one right one and you'll make up for it somehow won't you?
Sophie Dartwill - Tue, 07 May 2019 14:38:35 EST zXYjKqIG No.529258 Reply
Yeah I like needy fat chicks, I'll give her some D.....


Got fired without explaination from a Family-friendly workplace

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- Fri, 05 Apr 2019 19:51:00 EST xh6FpLWA No.528662
File: 1554508260807.jpg -(45029B / 43.97KB, 720x480) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size. Got fired without explaination from a Family-friendly workplace
Employers aren't your friends. Never.

>be me, loving my job
>working close to a year in this company
(sorting, ordering and repairing prosthetics and beeing occasionally outsourced to remove hazardous materials)
>every co-worker who has kids got more vavcation and the easy jobs
>not me
>a lot of arse-kissing going on with employees literally disrupting important instructions for mommy-talk
>One "proud mother" is constantly angry when not around our boss, comes in late and leaves early
>She leaves the workplace dirty (really not great when you work with materials that are dangerous for your health!)
>I have to pick up her work, because her laziness starts to affect my shifts
>talk to our boss but he doesn't care

>Last week close to finishing my shift
>boss fires me 3 days before my vacation
>no explaination
>I crawl to work the next day
>a relative from one of the mothers works at my place

fucking lying, evil assholes!

I spiraled into a deep depression since. Did sent my applications, but not a single answer
and I hate this.
10 posts and 3 images omitted. Click View Thread to read.
Sophie Goodworth - Sun, 14 Apr 2019 13:38:20 EST UZ9BzlLq No.528771 Reply
I said I've worked in good places but you've been lucky. I don't know anyone who hasn't worked at least one shit job they hated. I know a lot of people who like their career and have stayed with their employer years with no intention of going anywhere (one of my friends has been a decade) but they've all had to try at least a couple of very different careers and usually ended up with something they didn't expect. Sometimes when they found an organisation they liked they had to change what they did a bit too.

I feel like my hard work is rewarded right now but I've done a few jobs where it isn't. If the place has a high turnover it probably isn't you. If the manager has friends/family in positions it probably isn't you. If as I said, extra effort is considered par it's probably not you. Some employers see their people as people, some see them as assets which can be developed and grow and in time allow them to populate higher positions with people who understand the whole organisation better and have loyalty. Some just see employees as a short term resource, get them trained to adequecy and then just use them up. In every one of them there are signs that you ignore and when you're finally disposed of you realise they were obvious and numerous all along.

Being jaded about work is like being jaded about relationships. The good ones won't take you and you'll end up in a cycle of misery. However the idea that it's great for everyone else all the time makes it worse. We have all been in shit jobs but that doesn't mean a lot of us don't find good ones. I'm not sure there's a trick as much as not being afraid to try a few new things and persistence. If you find a job and realise it's shit, keep working there and apply elsewhere.
Hedda Hazzleshit - Sun, 14 Apr 2019 14:20:48 EST o73XImOz No.528773 Reply
you enjoy that illusion of being in complete control of what happens to you, you're not though

anyway, OP he could be right, but you say you worked really hard and I believe you. It could be you were one of the newest people hired and someone had to go. it could be he had a personal relationship with the other staff members and not you. it could be he figured you'd be the one who'd find it the easiest to deal with the firing and get another job. it could be a cursory look at everyone's old CVs showed you were the least qualified on paper, despite how much work you put in and how good you were. it could be that in your company something is valued that you don't have and didn't realize it was important, e.g. maybe they all have a bbq on sundays and you never went. it could be your emotional intelligence is lacking and you seemed distant or cold to other coworkers. it could be they flipped a coin to see who'd have to go. it could be someone's family member needed your job so they fired you to let them in. it could be they never intended to keep that position open long term, regardless of how well you did. it could be that your best wasn't good enough and the others were somehow better.

there's stuff that's in your control and stuff that isn't, you work out if you did what was in your control as well as you could, and if you did, you vent about the unfairness then you move on, because life can be unfair but it's not consistently fair or unfair and you do have a certain amount of control in many things
Martin Sacklewill - Mon, 06 May 2019 20:21:31 EST z9DpryVl No.529243 Reply
1557188491003.png -(215601B / 210.55KB, 640x639) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size.
Karma is a bitch.

I've heard again from these suckers through a good co-worker who does these hygiene-contracts! And oh boy!
My former employer got so swamped with work, that everyone has to do daily overtime.
But thats not the best part!

The one fucking mombie that hated me from day one got a new contract at this company that makes it harder to fire her.
And guess what?
She's getting sick on a regular basis since!
Everyone is constantly complaining and whining cause they can't finish schedules!

I hope they choke on their work!

If I am lucky I can start working at a competition company next month.
At least I hope so, their paperwork is so damn slow!

why am i even here

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- Tue, 30 Apr 2019 16:38:54 EST ehhnNOgT No.529133
File: 1556656734329.png -(41481B / 40.51KB, 1112x419) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size. why am i even here
If I've completely given up on moving forward in life, should I kill myself?

I have no plans or desire to do anything for the rest of my entire life. I have completely abandoned getting a career or participating in a social life. I have no friends, haven't even thought about getting a gf since I was in high school. All I want to do is nothing but people keep making me do things. I just don't know how much more I can take.

I know what you might say, just reverse your decision and start trying again! but it's impossible. I am just too defeated. I have spent over a decade trying to deal with my issues and every time I get exactly nowhere because I lack self control. Nothing will fix this shit and after a decade of trying I can't find it within me to try again.
6 posts omitted. Click View Thread to read.
Wiggles - Sun, 05 May 2019 09:15:27 EST JCATCBbz No.529215 Reply
First off, stop defeating yourself. You're abusing your psyche by constantly affirming that shit is shit and it's only going to ever be shit. You don't have to lie to yourself, either; just take a minute to mentally promote 1 good thing. Acknowledge it. IDGAF if it's "gee, wanking my willy feels nice" just inject some appreciation for whatever you appreciate into your mentality. You will begin to shape your attitude, which will shape your behavior, which then recycles into the loop. Slowly you will stop recognizing and empowering your paralytic thoughts.

You haven't given up. If you had you wouldn't have made a thread asking for a way to enjoy life again. If you were truly hopeless you would have killed yourself instead of showing DETERMINATION. You do have community and peers here. If that's something you want to have and appreciate, take mental note of and express gratitude for it. People who actually love their careers tend to build them. Once you latch onto something you like, give it your life and the money will come to you. The whole higher education system is a giant scam in my eyes so I'm glad I never bought into it.

Like others said, you are actively choosing how to continue. You can do this however you'd like, and your actions can speak truth over your words. Drop the ego off on the corner. You might feel alone but hey like I'm telling you dude I know you can have whatever kind of life you're willing to work for. And I'm not talking about job work; I mean soul work.
Basil Hezzleford - Mon, 06 May 2019 06:01:11 EST SvrL9OfC No.529229 Reply
i'm not telling you to kill yourself, but if you've truly given up on moving forward at all, then probably yes. i think the fact you posted a thread here before trying to commit suicide means on some level you aren't ready to give up trying to move forward in life though, otherwise why would you even bother?

fuck it man, why not stick around a bit longer and give it a shot and actually give it a good legitimate try before permanently restricting your options? i did and i've actually managed to climb my way out of depression and acquire some semblance of mental health. i decided to actually try for real at least once before giving up entirely and it wound up working, lol
Archie Bliddlelock - Mon, 06 May 2019 17:28:57 EST 0DOizHVp No.529239 Reply
1557178137545.png -(530985B / 518.54KB, 590x423) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size.

I give up every day
What do I do?

i go pull up my dreamcast, and just pretend like I shaved 20 years off.
back when it was just mountain dew and Power 92 FM

Just go back, unwind. nobody can take your fond memories from you.

find your own little time machine.

you'll get it.

I'm almost 30.

nothing changes.

you've just got to give yourself a little more chair and a lot less rope.

Heres a Subject you wont fucking work regardless you stupid piece of shit

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- Mon, 06 May 2019 06:25:51 EST mx986IvR No.529230
File: 1557138351335.jpg -(4586788B / 4.37MB, 5312x2988) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size. Heres a Subject you wont fucking work regardless you stupid piece of shit
My girlfriend is being a right enthusiastic cunt.

Im not qq just smoke one for me.

Jesus I know I should move on but...sigh...Putting up with her dumbass routine just gets a little bit easier every day when I give up trying to be anything even remotely useful to society.

I mean like, I can SMD solder with my bare hands.

I'm just a useless fuck with pussy so its ok.
pl0x - Mon, 06 May 2019 06:41:07 EST mx986IvR No.529231 Reply
1557139267024.jpg -(13119B / 12.81KB, 300x300) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size.
Like, I thought I was a spoiled manchild ohohoho did I find new levels of ohhhhfuck.

Jesus man, Its like living with all the worst version of haruhi suzumiya.
All tsun, no dere, no god powers to go with the god complex.

Did I mention that she literally makes me take a shower? Even though I like to put on the coffee and look out the window a bit before basically being waterboarded awake?

End meeeeeeee very much indeed sarcasm no self harm here just bitching
Polly Birringbitch - Mon, 06 May 2019 14:25:57 EST lXsK4abP No.529235 Reply
>anime poster
how surprising
Spunk'n'Chunk - Mon, 06 May 2019 15:43:23 EST jkYNEyRd No.529237 Reply
Do you even read?

This guy is comparing his stuck up roastie bitch girlfriend to a failed anime series.

God you're thick.

Op i feel you.

Just dont fight the routine, if anything get up before her gran enthusiasmo ass and make coffee, look out the window, put on some chill beats and then go shower with her, congratulations, you're dating Tsundere Spockbot with the emotional capacity of an occiloscope.

Just about how much you tell your therapist?

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- Wed, 01 May 2019 15:45:13 EST JC+V4DTi No.529153
File: 1556739913833.jpg -(101597B / 99.22KB, 500x499) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size. Just about how much you tell your therapist?
So assuming you've had a problem since you even became self-aware and you visit a therapist, regularly, for a shitload of money to pretend to be doing something about it, do you keep secrets? If not, do you tell everything right from the start, or try to built trust to the person with time and then maybe tell? Because, obviously, it doesn't make any sense if you don't. But then again how do you tell a nice lady that you smoke weed every second day and watch porn absolutely every day? It doesn's seem to be "the problem" tho,rather a temporary solution like pills and stuff, I mean you've got to survive day to day somehow
11 posts and 3 images omitted. Click View Thread to read.
Polly Hashford - Thu, 02 May 2019 17:46:39 EST JC+V4DTi No.529179 Reply
Yeah I do the pills as well
Maybe I don't really want to cut the cost and time, just stay in this miserably unresolved position forever for some sort of masochistic reward. I suspect my unconscious of sabotageing a lot of potentially successful developments in my life.
I have already broken out of two therapies, at some point they just seemed annoying or irrelevant.
William Panderhidge - Thu, 02 May 2019 20:06:05 EST qS3i0zvH No.529181 Reply
Shame the state-sanctioned mental health professionals in the UK are just as known for being retarded because politicians see no need to blow cash on "non-essential" health problems and the entire country is stuck in a perpetual mental health crisis created by its own ineptitude and cronyism just like the States.
If you want a state regulated mental health success story, pick Finland.

issues with sex driving my social anxiety and making life shit

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- Wed, 01 May 2019 18:25:24 EST Rxkq61CO No.529160
File: 1556749524009.jpg -(140638B / 137.34KB, 720x437) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size. issues with sex driving my social anxiety and making life shit
Hey /qq/

I'm a 24yo male who's basically a loner and I have somewhat severe social anxiety that makes forming friendships/relationships these days almost impossible. The most menial smalltalk can sometimes make me freeze out of fear and it really affects my quality of life. I also have quite fucking bad neurotic issues to do with sex and my sexuality (won't bore you with all the details) and I have noticed in the last few years that they are somehow connected to my phobia of interacting with people. I am neither completely straight nor gay and I find that when I am talking to a either man or a woman, the very concept that the laws of physics would permit me to have sex with them just terrifies the shit out of me. If I notice they are attractive at all whatsoever, it just makes me feel extremely uncomfortable and self-conscious to the point where I cannot stop worrying that they can tell that I've thought it from my facial expression and this makes it extremely difficult to continue the conversation. If they are ugly, then I just feel repulsed by the fact that having sex with them is even possible and, again, I worry they can tell what I'm thinking by looking at my face.

I almost wish I was either completely gay or completely straight so I could know what it's like to at least have half the population I could talk to without getting hung up about the mere possibility of sexual attraction. Can anybody relate? How should I dig myself out of this neurotic pit?
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Caroline Nimmergold - Thu, 02 May 2019 11:19:36 EST WY0Rz3BV No.529175 Reply
statistically speaking in about 3 years this will start to abate, you'll still have a sex drive and all but you'l find you think about sex 3 or 4 times a day instead of all the time. of course you could be an outlier, but hormonally this sorts it self out in your mid to late twenties. Hence all the guys who think they beat their obsession where as really they just got older

It is still worth working on it, just in case you do turn out to be an outlier, i'd say mindfulness meditation is a good option because you learn how to park or shelf thoughts that are coming at inopportune moments
Alice Dovingwut - Thu, 02 May 2019 16:07:35 EST USUZpST+ No.529176 Reply
try fasting for one second but have that second be on an infinite loop through an n curved dimension
Polly Grimstock - Thu, 02 May 2019 17:01:22 EST sVY0CjDe No.529177 Reply
Wait, so I was supposed to be thinking about sex more than once a week all through my teenage years and early 20's?


mental illness

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- Thu, 25 Apr 2019 21:31:47 EST oMFpLv34 No.528965
File: 5.jpg -(80085B / 78.21KB, 666x69) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size. mental illness
let me preface this that I do not have health insurance at the time.

so over the years my mental health has been gradually getting worse and worse, its becoming very obvious to me and the people around me that I am going through manic and depressive phases more and more frequent. at first I thought the mania was just my normal state and would enjoy the motivation it gave me for a while and I could be productive. now that mania turned into complete chaos and lack of inhibition and I find myself using drugs more and more often, specifically fent/heroin and cocaine. when I am manic I embarass the fuck out of myself and spill the beans to everyone and anyone while using copious amounts of drugs. I feel like god himself and can talk for hours on end. when I am depressed I struggle to even move and spend my day laying down on my tablet doing fuck all. its gotten bad enough that I have attempted suicide recently and the thought is still quite prevalent in my daily thoughts.

I dont have health insurance right now and just self-medicate with opioids and weed. I'm supposed to be starting school in a few months but I'm scared my mental state will just get worse and I end up fucking it all up. I have no motivation to seek out work, although I have a small time gig doing graphic design but its bullshit money, literally like $150-300 a week working from home.

has anyone been able to overcome something like this without professional help? typing this up I now see how dumb it sounds but I am becoming more amd more desperate. I am scared that one of these days that I cop my fent that I will end up just railing the whole lot on a spur of the moment deal and kill myself. I really shouldnt even be here honestly after my last attempt where I dosed a gram of fentanyl/heroin mix and ended up falling out in my bathroom and waking up 6 hours later with my legs completely noodled and my left arm as well. vision was super fucked up and I kept vomiting. I dont know how I didnt develop compartment syndrome as I was passed out on my legs on hard tile floor for the entire night. nobody found me thank fuck but it blew my mind away when I actually woke up.

I'm getting extremely desperate here. my mother thinks its a god damned fucking joke and keeps suggesting hypnotherapy and that psychiatrists wont help. the same stupid lady who refuses to acknowledge that my sister has severe enthusiasm and just blames it on ''''sensory issues''''. my uncle has aspergers and its quite obvious how similar they are but shes in complete fucking denial as well as my mental health.

I was relatively normal until a series of traumatic events happened to me; the seed was planted after a near fatal car accident that left me with a TBI and various bullshit injuries that took me months to recover from. my girlfriend/best friend of 10 years leaving me over and over and being a shitty human as far as our relationship went. I cut all contact with my mother because she went completely bonkers during my parents divorce that started happening during this period and was a complete piece of shit. then after living with my dad for a bit (lost my apartment due to the company I was with going under) he starts shooting up testosterone and abusing it while dating girls younger than my little sister. it was like living with jeckyl and hyde with the amount of abuse this man did to me. I never saw that coming and hes not the person I grew up with anymore. havent spoken to him in about a year now. after living with a relative for a bit I rekindle with my mother and all is well now, shes still a retard and does slightly abusive shit like gas lighting and searching through my stuff when Im not around then completely denying it. throwing shit away and denying it etc. whatever, its the least of my fucking worries at this point and I'm not living with her. also I lost literally all but one of my friends during this ordeal due to them not being able to handle my increasingly worse mental state which is understandable. so I am quite lonely now.

fuck, any advice would be awesome at this point. I'm so desperate right now and the thoughts of suicide just get worse and worse and worse. I am fine right now but am scared for my next phase of dumb fuck emotions to hit me and somehow it being even worse than before.

things I have tried:
>quitting drugs (i even quit nicotine)
>talking it out with friends

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Lillian Honeywater - Mon, 29 Apr 2019 15:51:04 EST hiKxQg3e No.529087 Reply
Oh god, I know what you mean about pain. I try to smoke weed for it but sometimes it doesn't cut it like if you have a broken bone or an old injury flaring up real bad. I borrowed some codeine from a friend once because I tore a pec moving furniture, it sucked balls for like two weeks.

What I would say is just take enough to stave off withdrawal, maybe see if you can get a suboxone script or something unless that's too much trouble. I've heard about Kratom for managing the symptoms but never tried it for that myself.
Charles Shittingspear - Mon, 29 Apr 2019 16:18:49 EST oMFpLv34 No.529090 Reply
I wish weed did something for pain but it really doesnt. I actually slowed down on smoking by quite a lot in recent time, used to smoke every day but now I take big ass breaks and sometimes wont smoke for weeks on end.

but yeah chronic pain is a terrible thing, it ruined my life. I used to be very active and was big into working out and now I can barely get up from a chair without groaning. I had a botched hernia surgery where they put that abdominal mesh in me and its been nothing but painful ever since. because of this my back is also ruined from compensating for my abdomen.

I kind of already do that, when I take kratom I take the bare minimum to the point where if I were to quit right now cold turkey, I would not experience noticible withdrawal. I dose once a day or so and then cop fentadope (''''heroin'''') on the weekends for actual relief and recreation. that can easily be stopped but I dont feel as if its negatively effecting me much so I choose not to.

you should try kratom man, its a life saver. if it werent for it, I'd be in and out of pain clinics on massive amounts of strong opioids. they told me I was fucked and to just see a pain specialist and at the same time my friend introduced me to kratom. been doing it ever since. I mean I've abused the fuck out of opioids too after a while but it wasnt for pain reasons, I just have a drug problem.

forgot to mention I've been using a ton of coke recently as well, about half a gram to a gram a week. I mean its not a ton but its not healthy at all... but yeah. shiiiet. im a mess.
Charles Shittingspear - Mon, 29 Apr 2019 16:19:38 EST oMFpLv34 No.529091 Reply
fuck off and stop posting here cocksucker. nobody gives a fuck about you and your 'advice'.

Evil is out there

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- Sat, 20 Apr 2019 08:14:26 EST pNgQLU7V No.528894
File: 1555762466242.jpg -(48737B / 47.59KB, 500x500) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size. Evil is out there
True evil is out there. Unforgiving, cruel, sadistic, unfair, tragic, and many other words go with it. How do you handle indefinitely living among it? How do you handle having a girlfriend/wife/kids knowing rapists, sex trafficers, sadistic kidnappers, and serial killers walk among us just waiting for one of them to find themselves alone at night? How do you sleep peacefully knowing you or your loved ones end could come from llong term torture and rape? People hold so much intellectual capability and creativity and can apply it easily to do the most evil things they can either because they truly hate existence, it gives them pleasure, or both.
After enough time spent online and coming across rape, torture, snuff, gore, and the like i think i built up some serious dissociation and depersonalization (bipolar developing in full force and social isolation probably aided to this). For a while i couldnt smoke weed because id hear people breaking in to my moms room to kill her if i laid there. I constantly worry about any number of this shit happening to my girlfriend, like if she doesnt respond fast enough sometimes ill sit there and worry she got kidnapped. And theres no way for me to calm myself down because all of this is actually possible. Not likely, especially if youre careful, but possible.

Ive tried and tried and tried to learn to accept the existence of this shit but its like theres something i still need to solve. Learning to defend myself and home would probably be good but idk anymore, i think its more the philosophy that disturbs me. Im like addicted to retraumatizing myself too. I constantly will go on to stormfront or wherever and try to find the most fucked up things people have spammed or posted on some tiny dead boards and im still not sure why. It definitely doesnt help but its like im trying to hold my breath, dive in, and figure something out.

Tl;dr its really hard living in this world knowing that my loved ones or me could be raped/killed/tortured/genocided/you get the point. Not only that but its hard knowing it happens in general and images and quotes keep flashing through my mind whenever i realize “hey i havent thought about anything fucked up for a while.” My question is how do you do it?
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Charles Shittingspear - Mon, 29 Apr 2019 16:44:30 EST oMFpLv34 No.529099 Reply
having fantasies is fine, its when you start getting the urge to act on it is when you should be concerned. if you ever start planning something or going out with the intent to do so, then that is when you should definitely be concerned.

a lot of people have this impulsive thoughts but the vast majority would never consider acting on it. its a taboo thing to talk about so it isnt spoken much but if you go to circlejerk you will see this is a very normal and common thing.
Jenny Chodgebanks - Wed, 01 May 2019 07:09:13 EST WY0Rz3BV No.529149 Reply
you are imagining the worst and then cowering

Here's what you do
  1. recognize that the worst is unlikely
  2. face it anyway

say your loved one was raped, think about what you would do to support them. don't throw your hands up and think no i couldn't there'd be nothing i could do, that's cowering, think up a plan.
(and make sure they know they can talk to you about things, and in your words and actions condemn the evil, because most women have been sexually... what's a word that won't make guys on here angry... pure and simple most of us have been groped, i'd be very surprised to meet a woman who has never been groped, i might think she was lying... so make sure they know you'd never blame them, ask them what they are wearing etc. et. and then )
have a plan to help them. know what organizations are out there, know how to use active listening skills, know how to recognize if someone is suicidal and how to get them help in your state etc. etc. have an action plan.. but STILL remember that the worst (rape and murder) is unlikely.

(That's the difference between someone who has a cupboard of spare tinned food just in case and someone who bankrupts themselves buying a bunker and an armoured van and a load of machine guns because the apocalyse is definitely coming on tuesday)

if this is keeping you up at night consider CBT
Hedda Greenway - Wed, 01 May 2019 12:05:28 EST SvrL9OfC No.529151 Reply
Idk man, I just... do? I accept that it exists and move forward in my life despite it, because a whole world beyond that exists too. Fucked shit and fucked people are a reality, and great shit and great people are too. It is what it is.

A big part of being able to accept the existence of evil is truly recognizing, appreciating, and internalizing the capacity for it that exists within myself. Evil does not exist in a vacuum. People are evil. More accurately, evil exists within people. All rapists, murders, etc. are people... people like you. People like you know, people like you love. If you truly believe you are not capable of such heinous and evil behavior, or that the people you love aren't capable of it, you're mistaken.

Perhaps, as you are right now, you aren't, but given the right amount of prodding, the right manipulation, the right circumstances, you are that very evil you can't accept the existence of. You are capable of accepting your own existence, aren't you?

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