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Harm Reduction Notes for the COVID-19 Pandemic

"missing out"

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- Sun, 26 Apr 2020 00:57:52 EST 84KHINZL No.534426
File: 1587877072716.gif -(1825672B / 1.74MB, 720x312) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size. "missing out"
How do I get over the... how to say it? The feeling of "missing out" on experiences I want to have but probably never will. I wouldn't compare it to the feeling of like, wanting a supercar or some shit like that.

For example my biggest one: I'm bisexual, lean more on the gay side, I only got into a real serious relationship with a girl a year ago, before that I was a virgin. I love her to death but I still dream about being with a man. My only hope is someday to talk to her about it. If I could work it right I think she might be ok with me seeing someone else purely for the sexual aspect. But I can't guarantee that.

Any thoughts on this?
4 posts omitted. Click View Thread to read.
Fuck Sesslestit - Sat, 02 May 2020 16:21:35 EST FO3wrxBb No.534457 Reply
Classic bisexual dilemma. I'm in a similar situation in my mind, but I prefer women and am single. Might make a thread about that one of these days.

There are a lot of girls I crushed on in college, and would have dated if I were more socially savvy. I wonder what they would've thought about my bisexuality.

Anyway, there's a lot of associated baggage that comes with bisexuality, and a lot of straight women see that as being a turnoff. It's not an easy thing to navigate.
Hedda Wedgekud - Sat, 02 May 2020 17:12:35 EST NUPLxYIu No.534458 Reply
As a young potentially bisexual man could you give me your input on a most I made over here on /sd/ >>102174

Sometimes I look at a beautiful woman and all these feelings dissolve and I only want to be straight. I've spent the last 2 days withdrawing from drugs laying in bed all day fantasizing about being in a relationship with a guy. I was gonna say boy but maybe it's more appropriate to say guy because boy denotes a younger male.

am I old fashioned and goofy for disliking polygamy?

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- Mon, 20 Apr 2020 21:13:07 EST jLsiaOOb No.534368
File: 1587431587019.jpg -(97202B / 94.92KB, 1024x576) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size. am I old fashioned and goofy for disliking polygamy?
warning: long ass vent

ok. we're friends now. things seem cool
after talking to my bros and my therapist I became more moderate regarding what I think about the issue, but still find no major flaws in my train of thought
I concluded that sure, I can't get into someone with too high and specific expectations. I can't expect something serious right out the bat when we hardly know each other
I wanted to try keeping this in mind. why not? but she's into that polygamy thing, hard. and she wanted me into her reverse harem, which I know would hurt me a great deal. if I'm in a relationship, it sucks knowing that I'd be "some guy she likes and fucks". waiting around for my turn, knowing she's around with some other dude.
it's just not how I want to manage my affections and my intimacy. I'm not religious, and I'm fairly moderate in my views. I don't think that Yahwe will smite me for not remaining chaste until marriage. but a degree of loyalty and compromise, as small as it may be, is how I like to roll

thing is, I manage my intimacy in a different way. there's nothing wrong with wanting to fuck only in a monogamous relationship. and I ain't even talking about doing it exclusively in a 3 year old relationship, or only after marriage. that's not what I think either. to, me it just speaks of trust and involvement

I know we don't share a cosmic lovey-dovey interstellar bond, but I know I'm gonna get hooked up. therefore:
-I only want to fuck her if we are in a relationship
-I'd be just another stud in her harem
which I don't want
done. conflict of interests

this does gives me some insight, although
maybe a taste will not hurt. I know very well that she ain't spiteful nor set on hurting people. some pals told me "just fuck her and be done with it"
but I fell in love. a quick fuck is not what I'm looking for. I ain't looking for hoes. I ain't looking for an open relationship
but trying out to see what happens may be a solid choice. thing is, outlook not so good down that way. in any case, I just need more time to digest the idea

damn, I'd be willing to try it out. of course the first chick I meet isn't going to be the love of my life. I know that. and since I talked to my shrink I made peace with people I like fucking other people they care more about. but I barely know her. even if she does care about me, it feels wrong

eventually I'd get thrown into the polyamorous web, which I dislike. I want to administer sex and affections as a whole, and in a exclusive, committed way. that's how I think about them anyways, because I don't think they're separate. I just don't feel comfortable with letting anyone come and go into my privacy as they please, nor doing the same to other people would make me feel good. I'd feel safe, understood and contained by only fucking people I love in a simple, non-polyamorous relationship

because of this, I know that if I have sex with her, I'm going to get hurt. so:
we just can't give each other what we want. she likes polygamy, I like monogamy. if we try to get along as a couple, shit will hit the fan. and I want to forwarn that

could my mindset change? why the hell not? but right now I ain't ready for something like that. I know that people who are into polygamy chose it after having a particular history. but not me. why not just start the simple way: the one I feel more comfortable with?
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Caroline Hashford - Wed, 29 Apr 2020 21:36:51 EST bnCms6Vn No.534436 Reply
>she is gonna harvest your energy. she's going to take your affection and give you back sweet poison.

We're all really lucky that this toxic mindset keeps you away from women in the first place. Jesus Christ dude.

>bad writing

What the fuck are you talking about that's a very common phrase

Being a jolly african-american

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- Thu, 23 Apr 2020 00:35:08 EST LQrqbkSc No.534397
File: 1587616508891.png -(6777762B / 6.46MB, 1125x2436) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size. Being a jolly african-american
I have the opportunity to make like $1000 a week on the side but I need a house with a name not connected to me

There’s this girl down the street that says I can use her house if I pay her. The thing is, this girl has been all over me for years and I really am not into her. Yes she is sweet but it’s very obvious she likes me a little too much and I’ve tried to just push It off and act like I don’t notice or am just straight up not interested forever.

I don’t want to fuck her. I’m not going to be a jolly african-american. I sometimes get pretty desperate though but I refuse to break down for this one. I feel like if I’m using her house to do this she’s gonna straight up try to fuck me and I’m not about that.

What do I do?
Samuel Dorringford - Thu, 23 Apr 2020 10:21:50 EST CCngDWLw No.534401 Reply
It's not who you know, it's who you blow.
Martin Hubberson - Fri, 24 Apr 2020 15:49:25 EST Qoe2oia4 No.534414 Reply
So you can get more than $500 a week easy but the only downside is you have to fuck this girl every now and then?

Time to decide what is more important to you. Money or not getting laid.

Unruly coworkers.

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- Fri, 10 Apr 2020 03:35:42 EST qTml9FbR No.534236
File: 1586504142592.jpg -(217598B / 212.50KB, 720x960) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size. Unruly coworkers.
How do you deal with subordinates at a job that are young, immature, obnoxious, constantly finding ways to slack off, and always yelling and cussing to one another in a small space when you aren't personally authorized to write up or fire anyone, and the head manager who can never will?

When two get together during a shift sometimes it's a complete shit-fest and I can't stand it. I've told them so many times to stop their behavior, but they always go right back to it. They're younger employees, and they actually do respect me and almost always do things for me immediately when I ask, but couple of recent shifts have been exceptionally bad with the two working together. To make matters worse, they know the head manager, apart from actually condoning some of their bad behaviors, will never discipline them unless they commit murder on store property, so they have no incentive to follow any rules they don't agree with.

Other people have complained about them, and one of the underlings with whom I share mutual respect has gone over the head manager's head and messaged the area supervisor about one aspect of what's going on. To be honest, there's a good chance nothing will come of it though since I know other things that have been brought to his attention have been completely ignored apparently. Apart from certain days they're generally hard workers that know what they're doing, and they're always fine when the other isn't there.

Anyone have advice? Thanks in advance.
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Lydia Fattingserk - Tue, 21 Apr 2020 06:09:38 EST o6sB5MdO No.534372 Reply
It's your manager's responsibility to deal with terrible employees. You don't have to worry for that. Concentrate being the best employee you can be.
Charlotte Wussleford - Tue, 21 Apr 2020 07:52:30 EST HQ1K9uL4 No.534373 Reply
You're getting worked up because these kids wont take their job at a pizza shop seriously and from what you've shared it sounds like management doesn't give a fuck. I think you need to realise that they are never going to take that job seriously, especially if they understand that there is almost no chance of being reprimanded. You're only going to cause yourself more grief by fixating on it.

Of course if you want to get drastic then you could threaten to quit if they're not brought in line by management. Obviously that will backfire spectacularly if your bluff is called.
Ernest Windlepere - Wed, 22 Apr 2020 15:25:53 EST qTml9FbR No.534392 Reply

Well, as it is now it's really just one person who's the problem, and the other good shift lead just told me this morning that as many as three people have complained about him making them want to look for another job because of his behavior. Knowing this I feel like my GM can't ignore that he needs to do something, and if he still lets it slide then I'll just have to look for another job.

Just wanted to

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- Fri, 17 Apr 2020 13:17:03 EST 8XFIaawD No.534351
File: 1587143823331.png -(1108394B / 1.06MB, 1239x637) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size. Just wanted to
Thank you guys.
I'm sure there's a lot of people like me, lurkers, or people who share some of the issues that are being brought up - I myself have brought my issues more often than once here - who super appreciate what you guys write.

When I'm lost, you guys are my mental hygiene. Wether it's advice I asked for, or advice you're giving to someone else, I can just come here and find some form of comfort. I only wish I could come back to people with the same love and attention (and tough love, as well) some of you do. I'm not a great writer but

I just wanted to give props to everyone. Love you guys.
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Reuben Conkinhurk - Sat, 18 Apr 2020 12:51:37 EST /D+GITaR No.534360 Reply
There are a LOT of fake posts here designed to stroke people's social media anger centers.
Samuel Gabbermitch - Sat, 18 Apr 2020 20:01:16 EST 1SSFeKJF No.534363 Reply
People focus on the shitposts though. Plus the truly malicious posters tend to quick fire shitposts sometimes repeatedly bumping threads so they are a lot more visible as a result.

Covid19 in January

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- Thu, 16 Apr 2020 00:58:04 EST Kt5TMNI+ No.534322
File: 1587013084085.jpg -(127890B / 124.89KB, 1024x768) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size. Covid19 in January
Back in January of this year, I got real sick with something. Coughing, fever, aches, muscle pain, sweating, all that stuff. Legit lasted for 2 weeks. But at the end of it, this persistent cough remained.

I went to various doctors, each giving me meds, but that little, underlying cough would not go away.

Now we in the middle of a pandemic and going to a doctor right now is a terrible idea. I do wonder if I got Covid19 all the way back then, and suffered permanent scarring of the lungs or something. The cough is still there, it's become the new normal for me, and I hate it so fucking much, it makes me wish I were dead.

I just need to vent.
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John Dupperbanks - Sat, 18 Apr 2020 19:59:31 EST 1SSFeKJF No.534362 Reply
Personal experience says that you get piles first. If you persist, I don't know. I eat a lot of veg now so the awful protein shits and wax bullet shaped suppisitories are done.

Dating beneath you

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- Sat, 29 Feb 2020 21:48:53 EST 72N5BQUN No.533837
File: 1583030933049.jpg -(2066521B / 1.97MB, 2560x1524) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size. Dating beneath you
Hi /qq/, I'm a girl dating a guy who is maybe a 3/10 as far as being physically attractive goes, is really boring (we don't have mutual interests), and isn't the sharpest person ever (he thought tablespoons were the same as teaspoons, has a hard time forming well-thought out sentences, etc.). Here's the kicker: he's the NICEST person I have ever met in my entire life. Our relationship is okay, I really DO feel like I love him, but there is this very nagging feeling that I should be dating someone who is more successful and traditionally attractive. This feeling comes up whenever we are having relationship problems or when he makes dumb mistakes, which is about every week or every other week.

To put it in context, I am probably about a 6-7/10 with a good body, am quite sharp, love intellectual conversations (which he doesn't really understand/can't keep up with), am going to school for a profession that pays six figures, but am pretty much a shut-in (outside of going to the gym and school) who doesn't use social media and goes on imageboards occasionally..., and doesn't watch TV, and doesn't have normal interests. Probably a bit socially awkward tbh, but not cripplingly so. Have a few friends here and there, but I moved for school and I find myself quite lonely sometimes because I can't find anyone similar to me in my classes.

Like I said, he is really nice, and very patient, but sometimes I can't help but feel like I am throwing all my potential social standing into the garbage. The more I'm with him the more I kind of feel like he is... well, kind of lame. I feel bad because that sounds pretty mean, but I can't help it. He likes anime, cartoons, video games, dumb youtube videos, and is generally kind of a kid. He's got tons of posters of all this stuff on his walls and has figurines. He has a lot of friends and a lot of people know him. I used to be impressed by this but I recently learned though that he used to be the most unpopular kid that people would pick on throughout middle and high school so he was kind of well-known. He's not that smart so I often don't know what to talk about with him and I find it hard to spend more than 3 nights a week with him. He was a hand-holdless kissless virgin and our sex is bad sometimes (although it really can be great). He can't have an orgasm unless he is jerking himself off and I work my ass off at the gym to look good and it kind of feels like he doesn't really find me all that attractive because he's watched so much porn. He also had unrealistic expectations of sex which we've talked about with each other, but I feel like I'm just disappointing him and he didn't focus too much on pleasing me in the beginning and I would spend 20 minutes giving him a blowjob. It was really bad in the beginning lol, partially my fault for not being so forthright about what I wanted, but even now it feels like he's just going through the motions of what I want sometimes.

I've had a tendency to date guys who aren't very attractive too, so I think something with my self-esteem is messed up. At the same time, I have enough of an ego to think that I am better than him (which is a terrible thing to admit), and it messes with the relationship. I often think about dating other intellectuals, but I don't think they will ever be as nice or as humble as this guy is and will probably be arrogant jerks like I am.

Sorry this is long, it is mostly a rant, I guess. I definitely got some good advice from this board before though, so please let me know if you have thoughts.
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Hannah Girringbanks - Sat, 04 Apr 2020 17:33:12 EST SksStEss No.534192 Reply
1586035992964.jpg -(94187B / 91.98KB, 1024x740) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size.

I'm calling it like I see it, OP's post is a troll post trying to get other people to feel bad, making guys who look at Anime and might be unattractive or inexperienced feel like if they have even a 6/10 girlfriend she will feel like you claim to.

You try to mention multiple traits a person could have for the purpose of spreading the most damage.

I'd like to express my sincerest Fuck you OP, take your bullshit somewhere else. No Bump.
Betsy Gevingcocke - Wed, 15 Apr 2020 02:42:40 EST 72N5BQUN No.534312 Reply
Hey guys, OP here. It's been a while, but thanks for the responses. Yeah, we broke up. It was mutual. It turns out he didn't find me very attractive, which is ironic and hurt my self-esteem, but I've accepted it. It explains a lot, though. Maybe I'm just not as hot as I was at 21 (I'm 27 now, he was 23). Yes, I was a bitch.

Weirdly, he said that he thought the only reason why I am dating him is "for his looks". I guess we are more similar than I thought, as one poster mentioned. I was really flip-flopped and confused. I'm still trying to figure it all out.

And yeah, I don't think I'd go as far as to say I hate myself or anything, but I know I have some issues with self-esteem and I try to be candid about it. I didn't graduate from high school, I got a GED so I always felt like I needed to prove myself useful in society, I guess. I'm actually in med school right now, which means I've come a long way, but to me, med school really feels like high school all over again (very bad for me), with cliques, popular kids, unpopular kids, etc. I think this aspect of it is bringing back immature ways of thinking about social status.

I feel a lot better now that the relationship is over. I really do have things I need to work on. I tend to eventually dislike whoever I'm with over time and think I'm better than them (ugh, if anyone knows why lmk). Sorry if this came off as being a troll post or anything. I really do appreciate the feedback, as interesting and varied as it usually is here. I got some good insights, still searching for answers though.
Cyril Sollyshit - Wed, 15 Apr 2020 09:06:43 EST rwmHBidJ No.534313 Reply
It's a troll post. You're signaling your virtues and values by writing a fictional story with characters who experience life the way you feel that life should be experienced. Why not post on a fiction board? Somewhere you can workshop this, maybe improve as a writer / author?

can't live without 'em

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- Sat, 11 Apr 2020 19:50:31 EST YTS6AkAH No.534274
File: 1586649031095.gif -(76229B / 74.44KB, 468x345) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size. can't live without 'em
I need to vent /qq/.

My girlfriend is sweet, loyal, cute but sometimes bigoted and soul-destroyingly obtuse.

She has multiple mental health issues and, to her credit, is working on them but it is at a glacial pace.

I sometimes think "maybe I should just break-up with this girl" but then I ruminate as follows:
>Grass is always greener... chances are the next girl would just have a different set of problems
>I still love her enough that I don't want her to suffer, self-harm or an hero, if I break-up with her
>She owes me USD 800 (600GBP/700EUR) which I'd probably never get back
>Maybe that ^ is sunk-cost fallacy, not that I really care about the money
>Without a g/f I'll just be up all night shitposting to feel less lonely.

Fuck, typing it that way it sounds like co-dependency. If there is no clear path maybe it's best just to ride it out and let events unfold for themselves, idk /qq/, idk.
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Hannah Blackfield - Mon, 13 Apr 2020 15:15:45 EST ROFqbd9W No.534302 Reply
>E.g. she can be very disparaging about entire countries (even though she hasn't visited them) or groups of people (even though she doesn't know any of them). I was a geography major so it is really difficult for me to hear; naturally I try and gently nudge her to think about her ideas from an alternative angle but she finds it difficult to reach understanding through reasoning and instead almost always becomes adversarial.
Education takes time. You were a geography major, so I can assume you spent four years in school, but you expect to change her worldview within the span of a single conversation? Be realistic.
It's good to encourage people to think by questioning their ideas, but it's not helpful to demand they come around immediately, even if their ideas are extremely fucking stupid. You have to be patient and persistent.

>"You don't answer me we don't even talk much you must have other bitches"
As far as I can tell the best way to respond to these kind of paranoid accusations is to deny them clearly but kindly. Allude to the universal: "everyone worries about loyalty", "nobody can be available for chats all the time", et cetera.

>I try to do things to help her help herself with her problems but the progress is so slow that when things get frustrating I start thinking about the opportunity cost of staying in a relationship with her.
You're not responsible for her mental health; she is. You need to be evaluating whether she is good or bad for you, as she is today.
I'm not recommending that you stay in the relationship; I'm not recommending that you leave. But you shouldn't choose whether to stay in the relationship based on whether you think you can fix her.
Esther Baffingway - Tue, 14 Apr 2020 00:25:00 EST 6LCI1CKD No.534303 Reply
>My girlfriend is sweet, loyal, cute but sometimes bigoted and soul-destroyingly obtuse.
>She has multiple mental health issues

Sounds like my girl.
Edwin Monkinville - Tue, 14 Apr 2020 06:05:59 EST UIa8+LGi No.534306 Reply
Manage your expectations, though. People like that often don't want to change.

fuck you

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- Thu, 12 Dec 2019 06:30:28 EST TUQC22QU No.532755
File: 1576150228439.jpg -(163776B / 159.94KB, 658x379) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size. fuck you
wemon should be mass murdering themselves in protest to misogyny.
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Cyril Chodgestone - Sat, 11 Apr 2020 02:28:57 EST TUQC22QU No.534258 Reply
He can not reproduce without you how embarrassing! Your Dr. Worm is a symptom of my universe. Because of me.
Matilda Brengerhall - Tue, 14 Apr 2020 03:41:29 EST mttQWkrO No.534305 Reply
we really peaked with a webm of a Brazillian zoophile screaming at a caterpillar in the dark while shinning a flashlight on it

I didn't like Dr. Worm as a mod that much, but as a character? The sites heel? There can be no other

Bully board?

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- Wed, 11 Mar 2020 07:22:17 EST WOlHi5IK No.533980
File: 1583925737453.jpg -(110328B / 107.74KB, 400x303) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size. Bully board?
Does this board still exist just so we can use the old supportive threads to lure new people in and bully them? That's just mean-spirited.
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Caroline Brucklewill - Sun, 12 Apr 2020 01:39:03 EST TUQC22QU No.534286 Reply
One day I noticed the Internet was a trap and I am bound to it. I thought the people here were lonely and desperate.
Molly Hurringworth - Sat, 18 Apr 2020 11:50:39 EST 80a+lf6a No.534357 Reply
the reason that most people who make threads on here are such unhappy failures is probably largely to do with a quality of irritating patheticness and melodrama regarding the slightest perceived problems and situations. This attitude is the thing that makes it so bad for themselves, something that others reciprocatively see and make it worse for them due to disliking the person, and the exact trigger of people seeing their posts online and some sort of switch triggering which just says "fuck this person"

im not generally vindictive. but i see so many posts on this board and think "fuck this person". This is my honest and thought-out opinion.

Perennial failure

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- Fri, 03 Apr 2020 09:19:41 EST UA+dazYP No.534179
File: 1585919981231.png -(8104B / 7.91KB, 562x384) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size. Perennial failure
Dear /qq/,

I’m a perennial failure. I have been on this board for a decade now and I still haven’t been able to change myself, my way of living or my outlook on the future in any significant way. I’m desperate to change this and I think I have finally come up with a guide that might help me crawl out of the miserable existence I currently lead.

I have made this thread with two reasons in my mind. Firstly, I want to share my background and current situation, as well as the knowledge and information that I consider helpful for people in my situation. Secondly, I hope people who are stuck in a similar situation as mine will share their story, their successes and the resources which have helped them.

Below my background story, I have posted a list of truths and principles I will try to implement in my life and see if I can bring about change to my life and actually improve myself. I’d be grateful to receive feedback or suggestions.

Thank you.
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Esther Wobbershaw - Sat, 11 Apr 2020 22:45:58 EST ehhnNOgT No.534277 Reply
>I don't have a job, and I don't have a social life. Not only does this make me feel ashamed and unworthy to be someone's friend, I can't imagine having to explain my life to anyone without alienating them, nor do I have the confidence to go out and socialise because I fear I will have nothing to talk about or to offer.
>I feel as I need to improve first before I can put myself "on the market." As it stands, I have little to offer to anyone. Yet, I also know this isn't a very constructive strategy, because if (more like, when) I fail at improving myself, I will feel even less worthy to go out and socialise or be someone's friend or get a job and I will just be pushed further down into the ditch I'm in.

Yes, this is the problem. I am quite familiar with it, but I think that for friendship to happen, all that really has to happen is people spend a lot of time together. They don't need to be impressed by you or entertained by you or even respect you, proximity seems to be the key. Many people have friends they dislike or even "hate", but shared experience in the same friend group is all it takes to make them a friend. I think though if others don't invite you to join them and you don't have the confidence to invite people to join you then you can get trapped in limbo and never develop the strong friendships that most people take for granted. I think the only thing to do is to break the cycle and start to invite people to do things with you. People generally don't like to host or organize social events because it's annoying and easier to just go to something someone asks you if you want to come along to.Asking people to do things with me was one of the things I always lacked. My parents gave me no help or guidance, they just took me to regularly scheduled group events which was the one way I had any sort of a social life, and when I sat home alone outside of that they never questioned it and neither did I even if I was lonely. My anxieties around doing it just stopped it from happening in the first place and it never became a thing I was comfortable with.

Modern life has made it so inorganic and awkward simply to spend time with other people on a regular basis. You have to schedule around their wage slave hours and getting everyone to synchronize plans is difficult, and then what if they don't have a good time when things finally do come together? For me it would be devastating and reinforce my feelings of worthlessness and make me fear that it would only drive them away from me even more and then my isolation would be confirmed to be something that is not a choice and not fixable and forever which would destroy me. But I'm pretty sure this is the core of my fucked up neurosis and not really rational or true. I know what I will get if I do nothing, I will get my worst fear, loneliness so it makes no sense to keep doing that. You can't win if you don't play. Ultimately it comes down to getting over my fears but I just suck at that. I know it is not the end of the world if I drive away people because they think I'm lame and boring, not everyone is going to like you after all, all you can do is find the ones who do, but this knowledge avails me little, I remain trapped by my fears. I have tried various self improvement strategies to try and gain confidence but it's amazing how quickly that confidence can be shattered. I've had jobs before and then when I try to take the next step and hang out with people, just the littlest negative things can send me back into downward spirals of fear.

I wish there were a way to simply spend this time with people as a part of life organically, but the best hope of that happening would be with co-workers and there the friendships are always shallow and impersonal because people need to be able to keep a professional working relationship and they will always value their careers and livelihoods over you. Perhaps other groups would be a good bet. Personally I'd really like to start getting involved in some sort of political organization because I think my country is deeply broken and needs reform and I want to find other people to discuss what comes next for society. I have kind of been in a state of defeat, just letting inertia carry me along listlessly, but eventually those periods have to end and you have to try something again. Perhaps this will be what I try…
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Eliza Gollywill - Sun, 12 Apr 2020 05:32:43 EST 1SSFeKJF No.534287 Reply
There's some stuff I disagree with and agree with here.

Basically though you're right that a lot of it is familiarity. If you're really awful they will avoid spending time with you. If you're great they'll make it easier and your friendship wil be better. If you don't share hobbies or having violently opposing values it's much harder to get that familiarity but you're right in that it's the key.

Friendship requires effort. You have to go out your way and so does the other person. This is why forcing it works better with people who like each other.

But you don't have a high bar to clear. Don't be awful, share interests, you're going to have to make effort. Everything is "inorganic" or whatever but fine. Book an activity or arrange stuff. You go a bit off the rails when you start worrying about things people won't feel.

You're doing that thing where a solution which could never exist and will never exist would solve your problems, then you're waiting for it. It wont' happen everyone else copes and some of them are a lot worse than you I promise.

People do hang around in places "organically" which is one of those words which is almost always bullshit outside properly defined contexts.

When they share hobbies which involve or require people it happens. Maybe it's 5 a side football, maybe it's friday night magic, maybe it's dive bars and playing pool, or making a band. Other groups are your best bet. I made a lot of my friends through a video gaming event that happened most fridays at a pub nearby after I moved into town. Most of the rest are people I see at gigs a lot. I made a couple by going to the least awful bar in town and just chatting to people who seemed alright until some people started seeming glad to see me.

"muh romantic life sux" thread #5.174x(10^12)

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- Sun, 29 Mar 2020 09:17:16 EST N4eypHeE No.534130
File: 1585487836511.gif -(99081B / 96.76KB, 235x250) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size. "muh romantic life sux" thread #5.174x(10^12)
I'm fuckin lonely. Actually I have been for most of my life.
Fuckin 29. I had a GF when I was 20. For like, 3 months. I couldn't handle it, it felt good but then my fears and insecurities crept in and ruined it all. She'd have left me anyway, right?

Maybe I deserve this? fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck. I just want to hug and kiss a lady so bad... I want to go back and try to make things work instead of breaking up. Seems like every other guy has no problem getting with girls... and it's more than that, I haven't been able to make friends since I was a kid. Even then, I was a weirdo, I was "that kid".

And I have just this huuuuuge list of problems with myself. How the fuck do I casually bring up, "oh hey babe btw I take all THESE prescribed meds for depression etc; and this one is experimental and I'm not even sure of its legality at other states, much less outside of 'merrica. Oh and I never want to reproduce, seriously I'd rather lose a limb then have a child. And then there's this whoole paranoia thing, and I'm not a 'breadwinner' in any sense ffs I still live with my parents, and all of that is just my surface-level baggage so yeah hit me up I'm sure you find me attractive :)"; THAT is what girls want to hear from a potential partner!

Now, I'm either gonna die of Corona, or live for 1-50 more years by myself. Alone. If I were capable of snapping, I'd have done it by now. I'm too weak and passive to kms.

My dog helps. Don't be a prick cuddling with animals is the most affection I can get. But damn. Life is basically just getting punched in the face over and over. I probably can't rely on having a dog forever of course, certainly not the same one...

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Simon Peddlesore - Sat, 11 Apr 2020 04:17:58 EST d4fOgvZr No.534261 Reply
I just want to thank you, OP, for helping me see how fucking insane I must seem from the outside. You dismiss every achievement you have and live in a prison of self-limiting beliefs.

A thing that helps me when I don't have your posts to look at is to think about the stuff I am *actually* limited from. Then things tend to get real real, real fast.
Like with this post: >>534145
Where you dismiss every suggestion made to you. That's cool, but if this is the attitude you're going to have you might as well be honest about what you want: An extremely specific encounter with a specific kind of person who has a specific reaction to you. I'm not saying this is impossible, but it's sure as hell going to be rare.

The *one* time you tried, you scored within thirty minutes. It's in your head, dude.
Caroline Brucklewill - Sun, 12 Apr 2020 01:21:10 EST TUQC22QU No.534284 Reply
What are his societies expectations though? Are they from realistic subjective experiences of media based or based on others experiences or a few bad experiences he will not adapt to for a reason or negligence? Social trauma is real, if the people in your area have a bad opinion of you try going somewhere where no one knows you and try to change to fit the ideal you desire.
Caroline Brucklewill - Sun, 12 Apr 2020 01:29:36 EST TUQC22QU No.534285 Reply
Well atleast some prostitutes give you a social interaction! You picked the worst part of his post to reply to, I mean your former yellow texts. Do you even have someone in mind or are you still looking? Don't stop thinking.

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