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420chan is Getting Overhauled - Changelog/Bug Report/Request Thread (Updated July 26)

illnesses

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- Sun, 11 Aug 2019 15:27:34 EST BhxVqxMT No.530961
File: 1565551654121.png -(465740B / 454.82KB, 700x500) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size. illnesses
I met a nice girl recently and things have been going well. Thing is her dad is recently quite ill with the return of cancer.

I want to be supportive without crossing the line of using her dad's illness as a way to get close to her. It wouldn't be my intention but it's hard not to feel a little weird about it as she's in a vulnerable state and it seems obvious that she'd be grateful for help. Maybe I'm overthinking things.
Anyway, advice on how to be supportive of someone with an ill parent would be good.
>>
Eugene Snodway - Sun, 11 Aug 2019 16:52:38 EST Je9nm5wp No.530963 Reply
I think if you're just candid with her about this if and when things become more intimate it wouldn't be inappropriate. I mean, obviously have tact. Don't just randomly be like "I want to support you girl, but I don't want you to get it twisted, we're just friends" Maybe just say something like you'll be there for her, whatever she needs, yada yada, and then try to slip something in there like "You know, I feel like we've really become close friends in these past few months (or whatever), and I want to help and support you in anyway I can". Workshop it a little bit obviously, but I think with this general idea she'll at the very least 100% get that you're not interested in a relationship with her, but she'll probably also pick up on what you're really doing and think it's sweet. Imo this is doing the right thing in the right way, at least putting myself in her shoes.

Also, maybe people disagree, but I honestly I kind of think that you should never even think about having a serious relationship with her at any point in time no matter what happens. After you've shared a lot of intimate time with her in a more kind of brotherly or familial role that kind of permanently alters how she sees you and there's no way to not take advantage of her no matter when you try to establish a relationship. I mean these things can work out differently in real life and if there's a genuine connection on equal terms fine, but I think it would be a kind of shitty thing to do to actively pursue her, at any point.
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Matilda Blevinglot - Sun, 11 Aug 2019 17:35:20 EST BhxVqxMT No.530964 Reply
>>530963
We are dating, I'd like to continue dating her and I want to be supportive. It just feels wrong to be building a relationship, bonding over support in such a difficult time.
There are a lot of "I want" statements here and things about how I feel. That's not right. I need to ponder this.
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Eugene Snodway - Sun, 11 Aug 2019 18:32:48 EST Je9nm5wp No.530965 Reply
>>530964
Ohhh yeah it completely just didn't register to me that "met a nice girl" obviously meant "started dating" and not that you literally just met someone randomly which is the only way I would use that phrase ok I'm dumb

I mean if you're already dating her I think it's different. I don't think you should feel bad unless you think "I'm building a relationship, this is great, she's mine" while her dad dies of cancer like a sociopath.

Dealing with terminal illness of a family member is incredibly hard and I think she really needs you right now, so honestly try to just take a break from thinking about it for a while, and focus I guess more on her instead of your relationship for the time being.

To me, the fact that you feel bad about it means that you probably have no reason to feel bad about it, if that makes sense.
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Matilda Blevinglot - Sun, 11 Aug 2019 19:15:11 EST BhxVqxMT No.530966 Reply
>>530965
That sounds right, thank you. I'll just focus on making sure she's doing as okay as possible.
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Beatrice Brookhall - Sun, 11 Aug 2019 20:58:03 EST hiKxQg3e No.530969 Reply
Eat lots of pussy and bring lots of alcohol, weed and chocolate.

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