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Discord Now Fully Linked With 420chan IRC

avoiding interested people and random life shit

- Sat, 19 Oct 2019 00:10:36 EST 1kZxLIuc No.532153
File: 1571458236825.png -(269992B / 263.66KB, 1016x1250) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size. avoiding interested people and random life shit
was going to post this on /b/ as a response to a thread but it 404'd and the future sucks now anyways so might as well paste it here. it's been a good 4 years since i was last here, glad to see you guys are still at it!

this (image related since i was responding to op) happened to me many times in my teens, but these are the ones i remember

14, goth chick constantly orbited me. she was a gorgeous redhead. too fucking spaghetti to realize what was going on.

15 in church, we didn't believe in god. was playing psp but i was so nervous because she was cute i just kept focusing on the game. she thought i was uninterested

16, exfriend set me up with this fat chick i had nothing in common with, we made out and stuff but it didnt last a week. i didnt like her.

at 18, second chick was this asian my group of friends hung out with for a couple years now. everybody liked her and hit on her, but she liked me. i was too shy, we walked on the beach one night for about 30min, separating from the group of friends. i think she was going to say something, but i was so silent and nervous i guess she got nervous too. after that point she started losing interest.

at 20, was doing dxm with some chick i had admired for a long time, she tried to blow me but i was too out of it to even feel anything. first sexual contact i've had. i guess all she wanted was a fuck because she never contacted me after. shes grown up into an amazing person and moved out of state. i don't think ill ever try to contact her though.

third chick, 21, first time i took initiative, i already knew she liked me so it was easier, i was older, and on drugs. started a 6 year relationship full of abuse. it destroyed me and im in debt now because of it. burned alot of bridges, but somehow kept the people who matter most to me. really wish i had fallen in love with someone else, i ignored all the red flags because she was my first. she also broke my fucking 420chan shotglass

^during that relationship we had broken up for about 6months. some lesbian in my neighborhood took a liking to me, we did alot of coke and drank together. she kept telling me she liked me but i wouldn't say it back (i didn't). eventually we fucked and never spoke again. she was crazy so it's for the best

30k in debt, absolute rock bottom. got fired from my job for reasons that aren't my fault. grandfather remarried to a younger woman who beats him since he has dementia now. she took control of the company that i worked for and fired me and my entire family. she forced me to go to rehab even though i was clean, she claimed she would pay for it, and that i would have a job when i got back. well guess what now i owe 20k and have no job. she literally told me she would fire my parents if i didnt go and did it anyways. between the betrayal of my own flesh and blood and my ex gf, this really broke me. worst of all im afraid of this coming back to me in the future if i become a pilot (more later)

after that i drank/drugged myself into an 14 day coma(pretty good story if anyone's interested, tldr i thought the surgeon was kojima turning me into a robot and shat myself, i couldn't stay unconscious during the surgery where they removed part of my pancreas so that was fucking terrifying)

here at 28, out of some miracle 2months after the coma i straightened my life again by force, got an amazing job that i enjoy being at every day. but the nights end the same, i come home, play vidya with the old pals on discord (known them for 15+yrs), eat, sleep, repeat. sometimes i go hang out with my old local friends or go racing/drifting or something. i used to be a pilot before all the drugs so i plan on getting back into that. not commercially though, i would like to but the rehab thing scares me. fucking waste of time that place was.

wondering how the hell im going to put myself back out there though. i wish i had the knowledge i have now in my late teens. but im not surrounded by people like i used to be, even still, my old habits of being super shy, the way i try to pretend to be disinterested will always keep warding off people. that hasn't gone away

the only people i hang with are a couple of old friends and theyre all settling down.

the loneliness is creeping up on me, but at the same time that sadness will never hold a candle to the terrors i had to fight back before i almost died. i hope i dont have to live and die alone, but at least i'm trying to recognize the issue. tbh, i''m not even sure if i should even be thinking about this right now.
Simon Sallerstire - Sat, 19 Oct 2019 06:26:50 EST rM9EOQD/ No.532159 Reply
Sounds like you need to focus on yourself.
Nicholas Chuggleseg - Sun, 20 Oct 2019 18:33:26 EST UC/aR6fj No.532166 Reply
We all make mistakes and look back and think "if I only I knew" to be a teenager is to not have a fucking clue.

You want to sit down and work out what you actually want. Then work out how to achieve that. Then do it a bit at a time. There's no workaround to being shy, but you can do things to make it easier. put yourself in an environment where you definitely have something in common with others and you know they're there at least in part for a social aspect. Putting yourself out there is hard but the first thing is to figure out where "there" is.

Then go out and have fun where women you have something in common with. If that fails you're out having fun and that's what matters. Going out on the pull and repeatedly going home empty handed will make you feel worse. Going out and having fun and relaxing will get you more interest.

Most dating sites are a shiftfest for most users. If you have any hobbies which aren't pure sausagefest do those and you'll meet more women by just enjoying yourself.

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