Leave these fields empty (spam trap):
Name
You can leave this blank to post anonymously, or you can create a Tripcode by using the format Name#Password
Comment
[i]Italic Text[/i]
[b]Bold Text[/b]
[spoiler]Spoiler Text[/spoiler]
>Highlight/Quote Text
[pre]Preformatted & Monospace Text[/pre]
[super]Superset Text[/super]
[sub]Subset Text[/sub]
1. Numbered lists become ordered lists
* Bulleted lists become unordered lists
File

Sandwich


Need new friends, but don't have time to find new friends

Reply
- Sat, 30 May 2020 08:46:00 EST zcMKtJVi No.534733
File: 1590842760883.jpg -(219833B / 214.68KB, 1600x1200) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size. Need new friends, but don't have time to find new friends
Long story short:

>worked my ass off to finally invest in my hobbies (that are snorkeling and filming underwater)
>finally got all the equipment i need
>friends have congratulated me
>but noone ever wants to go out and leave their couch

>finally some free days, we all will have vacation soon
>noone interested in doing anything
> all they do is smoking weed or playing with warhammer figurines or sitting @ their homes together and playing board-games

>when I try to inspire them by showing them the footage of my last dive they are impressed
>but whine about it beeing expensive
>they spend up to 1000.- for costumes and conventions

how do I find new friends when I don't have the time due to workload and not the best social-skills (like forgetting names and faces, the inability to listen and care about the problems of others when my work-day ends) ?
>>
Henry Bonnerbury - Sat, 30 May 2020 09:50:11 EST FWaorIk7 No.534735 Reply
>>534733
You know friends don't need to share your hobbies right?
You're into it, cool. Trying to force people you know to be into it, not cool.
Rather than try to find new people to force into your hobby, why not join a diving club or something? Make a post trying to find somebody local on a diving forum? Befriend somebody who's already into it.
>>
Sophie Dizzlebury - Sat, 30 May 2020 19:16:52 EST ocY0nHd9 No.534740 Reply
>>534733

Didnt you just get your camera like today? How did you go snorkeling so quick?
>>
Edwin Dinnerhut - Sat, 30 May 2020 19:44:44 EST 1SSFeKJF No.534743 Reply
>>534733
Board games are awesome. I'd play warhammer but it's too costly. Not that I can't afford it but given the cost and what I'd get out of it, I cannot justify it. It's an economic decision. Not "I can't afford it" but "I'd rather spend the money and time on other things".

Your friends have committed their money to something they enjoy and they do it socially. Not everyone wants to play boardgames and warhammer and not everyone thinks diving sounds enough fun for that outlay. Your friends are happy that you're progressing your hobby and doing what you want but you cannot do the same for them. Some of your "not the best social skills" particularly not caring about problems isn't a lack of skills it's just you're very self centred. Your whole perspective neglects that other people have their own desires, wants, hangups priorities and different motives and tastes. Even if you're just not an empathic, caring or kind person it's worth learning to model for that to better understand other people's decisions and choices better.

As others have said, join a diving club. There are people who like diving. It takes a certain sort of weirdo to want to spend thousands on a hobby where you can't talk to the people as you do it. I suspect you'll be able to broaden your stable of friends. You will be happy, your diving buddies will be happy. Your friends will be happy for you. There is likely an on line presence especially if they're forward looking filming types. But if not then I guess it's worth asking at the places you got your gear.
>>
Graham Curringham - Sat, 30 May 2020 19:53:43 EST nYk6cnF0 No.534744 Reply
>>534733
Go to fhe popular dive spots early in the morning and talk to other divers.
>>
Lillian Femblestad - Sun, 07 Jun 2020 16:40:35 EST 2W0CDXNh No.534863 Reply
1591562435838.jpg -(468329B / 457.35KB, 1600x1186) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size.
>>534743
empathy has its limits.
If they are seriously not even trying my hobbies thats a total lack of care from their side.

Lying in a bed in some bad home for elderlies some day and all to remember was sitting at home and playing with dolls is such a horrifying thought to me.
I know it can be comfy and kinda relaxing doing this warhammer-stuff and smoking weed in a room with friends, but in the end its a recipe for depression (to me).

If you enjoy this kind of stuff, good for you.

My friends weren't this demotivated and boring all the time. Back then we drove to some awesome swimming-sites or to these artificial climbing-gardens/woods.
But then they got all lazy at some point.
I blame youtube :-) and people thinking rotting @ home is a lifestyle.

Even more annyoing is to me the fact, that I bough a relatively expensive waterproof camera, a thing we would've killed back in the days, but now its totally uninteresting for them.
I guess they are kinda burned out of life and work, but they don't see it. THey are fleeing into their otaku and games workshop-bubble, like they are hiding from something.

idk.

I already contacted all the clubs in my area (seems we have to wait until Corona is over)
and I'll wait for their responses now.

Littlebit afraid I'm gonna meet soem snobby assholes and annoying princesses (that stopped my first attempt to get certified), but lets see...

Wish me luck!
>>
Emma Lightworth - Mon, 08 Jun 2020 09:51:03 EST U2D5rH6t No.534867 Reply
>>534863
>>judges the fuck out of "friends" for enjoying things OP doesn't enjoy
>>Littlebit afraid I'm gonna meet soem snobby assholes

Think about that for a minute
User is currently banned from all boards
>>
Walter Dellerhall - Tue, 09 Jun 2020 10:37:04 EST 7J8o2xTW No.534888 Reply
>>534863
My friends who buy their plastic crack were going to a couple of events a month where there's dozens of people.

If you provided the equipment for your friends and said "have a go" it's a bit disappointing that no one would take you up at all given they wouldn't have to commit a lot of money, just an afternoon. So yeah of course you'd be annoyed at them. At the same time maybe it just doesn't seem fun to them, it's something I'd want to try if I could do it cheap and somewhere warm but diving into the English channel in December (which I've seen someone do) sounds miserable. I don't know what you were asking though. Sometimes it's good to try new things, sometimes it's just going to be a day spent wanting to go home when you very concretely could have enjoyed doing something else with that time.

I don't know your friends lives and maybe they're richly social and you're not giving them credit or maybe it's only ever the same few of them in their bubble and you're right.

It's unfair of me to assume either way about the situation with your friends however your post is just end to end dismissal of other people and it worries me. When you both simplify people and start them on a poor footing you will find it hard to find anyone "Good enough" while in reality not giving many great people a chance. Maybe those snobby scuba divers appear to you the same way you appear to others and one of you needs to persist until that shell is cracked (and if they're sitting pretty you're going to have to do the work).

The youtube thing was 100% pure cliche though.

Report Post
Reason
Note
Please be descriptive with report notes,
this helps staff resolve issues quicker.