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- Thu, 17 Sep 2020 14:59:04 EST m8gMi16v No.536182
File: 1600369144805.jpg -(474107B / 463.00KB, 828x793) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size. Hrhdjruhdjkejfh
I’ve been watching “I may destroy you” and it has me thinking about all the times ive been sexually assaulted, and how 99% of people in my life dont even know about it.
i have never been raped, as far as i know. but i have been

-sexually assaulted by my cousin. I remember crying on the stairs after and him telling me that if i told my parents they wouldn’t believe me
-sexually assaulted by my brother
-drugged and maybe sexually assaulted by an acquaintance, but i never reported it so i dont know. I asked my friends about what happened and they were completely unhelpful and seemed like they didn’t want to believe something like that would happen, and i didnt want to believe it either
-pretty sure the same guy tried to do the same thing another night, but fortunately i ate too much chinese food earlier in the day and i puked. woke up topless with my shirt by the door and puke on the floor and vague memories of being bent over a couch.
-sexually assaulted by an ex-boyfriend

there is no point or purpose to this thread i just wanted this information somewhere in the world so i stop carrying it by myself. I see a therapist but when i talk about this stuff i gloss over details and act like im over it because i dont want to talk about it. I dont think theres much he could say about it anyway besides “yikes that sucks”

Thanks for reading
>>
Fanny Drunkinnidge - Thu, 17 Sep 2020 16:32:09 EST CLNa4fJu No.536186 Reply
>>536182
You know, I believe you about that and all so I’m not arguing that it happened. I am just confused.

How is it so many people who are sexually assaulted one time end up getting sexually assaulted dozens of times by different people? Like, one time I fell off a skateboard on a big hill and I never rode a skateboard down a big hill again.
>>
Phineas Crallykure - Thu, 17 Sep 2020 18:22:45 EST ch9f8L7t No.536187 Reply
>>536186
Riding a skateboard down a big hill is a choice. being sexually assaulted is not
>>
Phineas Crallykure - Thu, 17 Sep 2020 18:32:50 EST ch9f8L7t No.536189 Reply
>>536186
“Women who become victims of sexual assault are at much higher risk than other women of being victimized again. Research has suggested that psychological processes initiated by sexual victimization, especially in childhood and adolescence, result in behaviors that can increase victims’ exposure to potential offenders and make them more vulnerable to the tactics of the offenders they encounter.”

“ More surprisingly, research has shown that victims of other types of crimes are also at high risk of revictimization: robbery victims have a nine times greater chance of being robbed again than non-victims, and burglary victims have a four times greater risk of another burglary (Canada Solicitor General, 1988; National Board for Crime Prevention, 1994).”

“ A number of models have been proposed to explain how psychological processes triggered by sexual assault increase risk of future victimization. Most of this work has
been specifically developed to explain what happens to children when they are sexually abused, but much of it applies equally well to adult victims of sexual assault.
Browne and Finkelhor (1986) developed a comprehensive “traumogenic” model to explain how early sexual abuse may increase the odds of abuse later in life through four dynamics. First, Browne and Finkelhor postulate that, through “traumatic sexualization,” child sexual abuse results in the association of sex with affection or attention, thereby promoting promiscuity or compulsive sexual behavior. Second, Browne and Finkelhor hypothesize that feelings of betrayal lead to a strong need to re establish trust in others, but poor judgment about which individuals are trustworthy. Third, they believe that abuse leads to powerlessness, similar to the concept of learned helplessness described by Seligman (1975) in regard to depression and Walker, (1979) in regard to battered women. The sense of powerlessness inhibits victims from asserting themselves in rebuffing unwanted sexual advances.”

“ For example, Gold, Sinclair and Balge (1999) proposed that internal, stable and global attributions about child sexual abuse (i.e., the child believes the abuse was due to an unchangeable characteristic of herself that will affect other areas) may produce distress, substance abuse, or high risk sexual behavior. Arata (2000) found that both PTSD and self-blame predicted revictimization of child sexual abuse survivors in a large sample of undergraduates. Irwin (1999) found that victims of child abuse who “positively reappraised” their abusive experiences had a lower revictimization rate”
>>
Hamilton Grimworth - Fri, 18 Sep 2020 08:47:26 EST wIV+lz7o No.536191 Reply
>>536186
>implying the victim has any responsibility for not being sexually assaulted
Come on, man. Only one person is responsible for rape, the rapist.
>>
Shit Honninghall - Fri, 18 Sep 2020 17:15:46 EST CK9jwNkj No.536194 Reply
>>536191
I wasn’t trying to victim blame I was just asking how is it that it seems people never get raped or they get raped a ton Jesus I don’t know the numbers, it’s ok to ask a question

It’s like if someone got food poisoning at almost every restaurant I’d be like whoa how tf does that happen to them
>>
James Snodforth - Fri, 18 Sep 2020 19:31:52 EST jnas4L6T No.536196 Reply
>>536191

i thought the same thing. it's easy to stretch that question and apply horrible thoughts like "asking for it" and other trash, but i too have noticed there tends to be clusterings of these things. the research posted a few posts ago is very interesting, and very sad
>>
Oliver Siddlestone - Sun, 20 Sep 2020 12:06:26 EST 1SSFeKJF No.536218 Reply
>>536194
Maybe they were born in a bad area, had bad behaviour (ie all the things that would cause other people to get the fuck away from these people) normalised, maybe they're unlucky, maybe they got unlucky once and the way it made them act put them in more danger or marked them as a victim, maybe they got passed around by shitty people.

I guess if we're going to use your shitty metaphor and steer it away from the obvious. What if that person was raised by a family who made them afraid of washing their hands after shitting? Or they learned to feel that roaches crawling on the food was normal? Maybe they're living somewhere that other people are taught these things and they aren't aware this is unusual because they've never known any different?

Also plenty of people who get food poisoning once don't bring it up often. People whose lives have been repeatedly derailed by stomach flu will mention it, but someone who ate something bad will not bring it up to anyone unless it's relevent to conversation. Maybe it's just sampling bias or just not noticing the number of once raped people. If you're food poisoned it's often going to be your word against the restaurant so you just get over the illness, perhaps spend a while over compensating and then move on with your life. You don't want to bring it up or relive it. People will be more candid on image boards, few people know about the time I got heliobacter at a cafe, fewer people still know that I was sexaully assaulted by my friends when I was 15. It's half a life and I spent years dealing with the spiralling consequences of that, the knock ons, but I'd gain nothing from confronting those people now and so unless they come to me it will remain private.
>>
Walter Clinnerwin - Tue, 22 Sep 2020 23:44:31 EST /a0EWK+P No.536258 Reply
Therapist is probably a waste of time OP... just my opinion, maybe you find some good in them but I never have. What kind of a therapist could you not confide this stuff in to feel some sort of relief? All of them, unfortunately...

You're female right? I'm sure you've been raped, there's no reason to deny it. Almost every woman I have ever met has been raped at some point, some extremely violently and some under threat, some under drugs, but all of them.

I would suggest you quit drinking, it seems like your "friends" are using you as a fuckstick and drinking would make it easy
User is currently banned from all boards
>>
Jarvis Hunnerdale - Wed, 23 Sep 2020 07:11:48 EST SIQUFwhT No.536260 Reply
>>536258

No, a therapist is not a waste of time. Don't listen to this shit.
>>
Phineas Mangermore - Wed, 23 Sep 2020 08:46:05 EST ic1gmhwA No.536261 Reply
>>536258
If someone tried to convince your sister of this, you'd beat his ass. The only reason you behave this way is because people call you a piece of shit for behaving this way, so you eventually became convinced that this is your unironic personality, in an endless cycle of self-depreciation and abuse. Break free from this. Either you believe this or you don't, but you said it. Break free.
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Graham Paffingshaw - Thu, 08 Oct 2020 03:13:17 EST /a0EWK+P No.536368 Reply
>>536261
I already don't talk to my sister like ever, I could care less what you tell her, she's your friend not my wife
User is currently banned from all boards
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Hedda Sashpud - Sat, 10 Oct 2020 10:26:47 EST NMfjbxIf No.536392 Reply
your therapist can do trauma work with you if they know about this and if they are a therapist who knows how to do trauma work. There's a lot that can be done, non-PTSD trauma still has loads and loads of physical symptoms and side-effects, and they are all totally curable with the right therapist (a lot of therapists have no training in how to work with trauma though)

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