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Videogame consoles as self-defense weapons

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- Sun, 18 Aug 2019 20:38:34 EST dV86rcx/ No.741721
File: 1566175114561.jpg -(34746B / 33.93KB, 605x452) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size. Videogame consoles as self-defense weapons
i always like to have a videogame console to use to defend myself in emergency situations. A guy tried to rob my house yesterday and i hit him a couple times with my wii u and it seemed to do the trick, but my wii u stopped working after that for some reason. can y'all recommend me a videogame console that you can most reliably and efficiently use for self-defense purposes i think that self defense is very important
>>
Great Mighty Poo - Sun, 18 Aug 2019 20:46:04 EST BqZ3681z No.741722 Reply
1566175564689.jpg -(21402B / 20.90KB, 434x700) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size.
The Wii literally comes with nuchuks.
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Chuck Greene - Sun, 18 Aug 2019 21:06:28 EST VnbQElvH No.741723 Reply
My brazil sense is tingling
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Augustus Cole - Mon, 19 Aug 2019 00:56:57 EST 1PRipo9X No.741724 Reply
I wasn't trying to rob you, dude, I was trying to suck you the hell off. You could've had a working console AND a sucked dick, but now you have neither. Hope you're happy, bitch
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Claude - Mon, 19 Aug 2019 01:30:25 EST +FEWF/1n No.741725 Reply
1566192625376.jpg -(19830B / 19.37KB, 500x500) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size.
The GameCube has a handle and sharp corners. Perfect for flailing around and cracking skulls.
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Nicole Brennan - Mon, 19 Aug 2019 01:55:08 EST ElXDc0JN No.741726 Reply
1566194108858.png -(257710B / 251.67KB, 579x329) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size.
During Loadscreen, I tend to hold my playstation 4 controller like a gun and pretend to shoot and reload it. I even allign the space between R1 & R2 with L1 & L2 to make sure my aim is straight. I've been doing this since PS1.
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Stryker - Mon, 19 Aug 2019 08:11:15 EST zw6D4U3i No.741729 Reply
The wii has literal nunchucks. Just fling those bad boys around. They'll get the message.
>>741726
nice
>>
Player One - Mon, 19 Aug 2019 09:14:28 EST Ju8Qha/B No.741731 Reply
>>741722
>>741729
>>741725
are only nintendo consoles good for self defense? What if you don't even like videogames, like, what if you just like watching cutscenes and jacking off to the graphics but you also want quality selfdefense then what is best console
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Falco Lombardi - Mon, 19 Aug 2019 09:21:25 EST An8kNAhA No.741732 Reply
Just use the original xbox. If you can even lift it. Even the controller was large enough to bring down most prey.
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Aeries Gainsborough - Mon, 19 Aug 2019 09:24:05 EST UcENjjuY No.741733 Reply
>>741731
If you're one of those people you might be better off smothering the home invader with your dakimakura
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Marcus Fenix - Mon, 19 Aug 2019 12:08:05 EST bgGxd7dP No.741739 Reply
1566230885429.jpg -(4755943B / 4.54MB, 5700x2620) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size.
throw it like a big rock
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Raiden - Tue, 20 Aug 2019 10:50:32 EST 6BDOIzot No.741769 Reply
>>741739
Whoa, slow down a little bit, cowboy. I don't think OP wants to kill anyone
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Lucas - Tue, 20 Aug 2019 13:55:03 EST noL7S+Qv No.741773 Reply
ah i just remembered the old XBOX HUEG meme
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Dante - Fri, 23 Aug 2019 09:12:13 EST +40USKZB No.741906 Reply
1566565933846.jpg -(80945B / 79.05KB, 600x608) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size.
Activate transmutation circle
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Earthworm Jim - Fri, 23 Aug 2019 09:29:20 EST KPChXmhP No.741907 Reply
>>741725
I actually saw a vid someday where they compared how rugged some consoles where and the GC won out still being playable after being dropped from a high building etc.
Also it´s without competition on battle ergonomics with that handle.
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Jon Irenicus - Sat, 24 Aug 2019 01:05:11 EST GVBNoZQ8 No.741924 Reply
>>741906
I don't think they properly considered the transistor count differences when factoring in their rule of equivalent exchange...
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Sarah Kerrigan - Sat, 24 Aug 2019 09:17:10 EST VvNtASO8 No.741933 Reply
>>741907
GC might have survived the drop on a pavement, but XBox probably took the pavement with it.
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Jack Rex - Sun, 25 Aug 2019 03:01:40 EST +40USKZB No.741950 Reply
>>741924
It's black-box technology. I don't have to explain anything...
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Bloodmongo McFerguson - Sun, 25 Aug 2019 04:14:47 EST A0EiJyuw No.741951 Reply
>>741933
I know what he is talking about, it was on X-Play and no, the xbox's disc drive would no longer work after the two story fall where as the gamecubes only issue was that the top wouldn't latch shut, something that can be fixed with a little tape
>>
Tingle - Sun, 25 Aug 2019 08:49:59 EST Z3rp+Sl/ No.741964 Reply
>>741721
Hey. I'm pretty sure I had almost exactly this same argument with a certain social justice/recycling organization! Only little difference was, it wasn't about consoles, it was about power supplies.

Basically, they had hoarded-up way, way more power supplies than they could ever have use for or could conceivably extract value from, and this was especially becoming problematic because the way the PSUs were stored, their wires were tangling together and they were falling, so I was pointing out that they should get rid of the ones that, ummm ... oh yeah, wouldn't make good weapons, that had to have been the important factor that everyone would have agreed with! Not to mention that every time one or two of them fell, it meant a dimminishing of their ... weaponness, yeah that's it!

There weren't too many PSUs known to make extremely good weapons, like ones manufactured by Seasonic, but there were some that unexpectedly were feeling surprisingly weaponnous, like ones manufactured by Hipro which often came with IBMs. Or sometimes with Dells, it was a bit surprising that Dell was so concerned with giving you a good PSU to hit people with.

It's particularly ironic together with that picture, there was a guy there who was like exactly like "Boxer" from animal farm, and the way he reacted to this, he felt sorry for the power supplies that didn't make good weapons and horrendously dreaded the thought of judging the poor, innocent power supplies.
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Bowser - Wed, 28 Aug 2019 21:42:59 EST 5LYJws1L No.742065 Reply
this thread is fucking weird...
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Guybrush Threepwood - Thu, 29 Aug 2019 07:05:54 EST ASnPy2v8 No.742075 Reply
1567076754716.jpg -(95111B / 92.88KB, 604x624) Thumbnail displayed, click image for full size.
>>741721
My older cousin was addicted to smokin dope off foil and my aunt caught him in the bathroom. She proceeded to hit him with a heavy bible then chucked an Xbox360 at his head.

360 no scope headshot should do it man.

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